Chapter Text
“Hey Shou~~”
“No.”
Hizashi had the audacity to pout at this. “You don’t even know what I was going to say!”
Shouta rolled his eyes and sighed. “Hizashi, I’ve known you since we were fifteen. Do you think I haven’t learned your ‘I’m gonna ask you to do something and you won’t like it’ voice in the past six years?”
Hizashi laughed awkwardly and swung an arm over Shouta’s shoulder, causing the butterflies in the man’s stomach to flutter. He had been flustered by the blonde from the very beginning, when he was forcefully befriended during their first year of high school but over the past two years it only increased. For the longest time he refused to name the feeling, but eventually he accepted he had a crush on one of his best friends and only recently resigned himself to his fate. He hadn’t done anything about it, of course, but it also meant that he thought about the man more than usual.
Which didn’t mean much since he was already thinking about his friend more than the typically allocated best friend time ever since the end of the first year. But that was beside the point.
When he blinked himself into awareness, he was met with the best puppy eyes Hizashi could muster. Ah, spacing out only to come back to himself to be met with those gorgeous peridot eyes looking at him pleadingly was decidedly not safe for his heart.
And Shouta was a weak, weak man. Despite being subjected to those puppy eyes for the past six years, his immunity was non-existent, and he’d always given in. Who wouldn’t, though? (A tiny part of his mind - that sounded not unlike Oboro - was whispering that probably most people and he was just that gone. He refused to listen to it.)
“What is it,” he asked with a heavy sigh.
Hizashi perked up immediately and beamed at him.
“Sooo… you know that we have this huge 10-year reunion with my American side of the family at Christmas, right?”
“Of course. You've been talking about it since August.”
The whole Yamada family, four generations in total, were supposed to meet at the Yamada residence in the countryside for two weeks during Christmas break. Hizashi was excited to meet his cousins and nephews that he hadn't seen since the last reunion when he was a pre-teen.
“Yeah, so… My parents asked if I'll bring a date, and I panicked and said I would, and…”
Shouta's heart started racing. If he understood what Hizashi was getting at…
“Cut the crap, Yamada.”
Hizashi’s cheeks tinted pink. “So I kinda told them I'd bring… Well, you.”
Shouta looked at his best friend incredulously. He was a great man, a brilliant man (the five languages he spoke fluently were the best testament to that), but unfortunately he was lacking in the brain cell department when it came to day-to-day situations. Seemed like Oboro was in possession of a brain cell for the day when the phone call happened.
“Why me?”
“Ah, you see,” Hizashi laughed nervously and awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “I said I'd bring a date, and they asked if it'd be you? And I panicked and said yes, and please, Sho, say yes, I'll do anything for you.”
Shouta rubbed his hands, pretending to be freezing due to the snow falling around them. Why would his parents assume that Shouta would be Hizashi's date? Did they suspect something since the last time they visited the Yamadas during the summer? God, was he that obvious? Did it mean Hizashi was that oblivious or was he simply not interested?
He was pulled from his thoughts by something warm put over his hands. When he looked down, he realised Hizashi put his red woollen gloves on his hands.
“Hizashi, you don't have to…”
Hizashi simply grinned. “You know I'm always running warm! So, what do you say? Please, Sho, please, please, please, please. It'd mean the world to me.”
Shouta sighed. It was a bad idea. It was a bad, bad idea and yet…
… He didn't want to say no.
He nodded, and Hizashi cheered loudly. “Thank you so much! You won't regret it, I promise!”
I already do, Shouta thought, but it was too late. Why did he agree? Beside that, what did it actually entail? Would they have to be all lovey-dovey in front of the whole family? Would he receive Hizashi's undivided attention and affection knowing it's all fake?
God, why did he agree to it?
Shouta decidedly did not think about pretending to be Hizashi’s boyfriend for the next month. The moment his thoughts even strayed towards those parts, his heart started racing and his hands were getting clammy. He also didn’t mention it to Oboro and Nemuri, knowing they would tease both of them relentlessly, as they did ever since the end of the first year in school. He should never have admitted his crush to Oboro; it was probably the top five mistakes of his life. The constant teasing was unbearable, not because it was annoying him (that too) but because it was driving home the fact he’d never have what he desired with all his heart. Hizashi? In love with him? Yeah, sure.
Except now they’d be pretending to be boyfriends for two weeks, and Shouta wasn’t sure how he was supposed to survive that.
Before he knew it, he was standing on the platform, waiting for the shinkansen to Sapporo. The Yamada estate was just outside of the city, a huge mansion in which he, Oboro and Nemuri got lost in more times than they could count when they visited the family the year prior. It was rather quiet at the time, with only the four of them and Hizashi's parents and grandparents. Shouta couldn't even begin to imagine how noisy it was going to be when the Japanese-American side of the family would fill the rooms.
He was so lost in thought he didn't notice Hizashi - his fake boyfriend - appeared on his side and planted a loud kiss on his cheek. He couldn’t help the blush that rose to his cheeks, and on instinct he ducked his head to hide behind a curtain of hair.
“What was that?” He asked with a strained voice, avoiding looking at the blinding smile Hizashi was sending his way.
Hizashi’s smile turned sheepish. “Ah, I thought we may get into character before arriving!”
Character. Right. Because there was no way, in this reality or any of the alternative ones, where Hizashi returned his affections.
He tried to scowl at his best friend, but the effect was probably ruined by the redness of his face. Hizashi laughed nervously.
“Sorry, sorry!” He said placatingly just as their train stopped at the platform. Hizashi reached for Shouta’s suitcase and boarded the shinkansen without so much as a second look. Shouta sighed and followed him, and soon they were sitting in their assigned seats. Shouta immediately took out his travel neck pillow to make himself comfortable. He closed his eyes, hoping to get a bit of final peace before their performance at the estate began but he couldn’t with Hizashi being fidgety in the seat next to him.
He cracked one eye open. “Everything ok?”
Hizashi froze. “Y-yeah, sorry. Just kinda nervous? Haven’t seen the peeps in ten years!”
Shouta sighed. “Just listen to some music, it always calms you down,” he suggested and tried to face his friend without changing the position much.
Hizashi smiled at him softly (and oh, how Shouta wished that smile would always be on him, and only him) and reached to his backpack for the earbuds. He extended one of them to Shouta.
“Wanna join?”
Of course he wanted to. He always wanted to do things together with Hizashi, and they’ve been sharing earbuds since their first year at UA. Before Hizashi went wireless, they even had a headphone splitter that allowed the trio to listen to the music Hizashi DJed for them. When Hizashi switched to a much better quality wireless earbuds, Oboro, ever the wingman, let Shouta get the second bud most of the time, while claiming his music taste changed too much to stand Hizashi’s choices. Hizashi was offended for the entirety of three seconds and then he happily went into DJ mode.
Now, Shouta took the bud, placed it in his left ear, and waited patiently for Hizashi to start the first song.
As usual, the music worked like a charm, and soon Hizashi was sitting comfortably, not an ounce of the previous restlessness to be found. Meanwhile, Shouta let the soft pop music and the movement of the shinkansen lull him to sleep.
The next time he opened his eyes, he found a strand of blonde hair blocking his vision. He stiffened for a brief second before he realised he had migrated to Hizashi’s shoulder in his sleep. He almost sat up when Hizashi’s arm snaked around his shoulders and pressed him further into the blonde.
“Go back to sleep, Shou, we still have two hours,” Hizashi murmured, his lips brushing the top of Shouta’s head.
Well, now he simply couldn’t sit up or Hizashi would see the blush that covered his cheeks. He put down the pillow, turned himself to his left to be more comfortable on the man’s shoulder, and inhaled the scent of Hizashi’s citrusy cologne and his strawberry shampoo as discreetly as he could. It was good. It was familiar.
He fell back asleep almost immediately and dreamed of Hizashi kissing him gently in the snow.
Two hours later, he was shaken awake. He blearily looked up at Hizashi who was grinning at him.
“Time to go, Sleeping Beauty,” he said, amusement lacing his words.
“Sure thing, my Prince Charming,” Shouta replied sleepily without thought, missing the way Hizashi’s ears turned just the tiniest bit of red.
The trip to the Yamada estate took about half an hour by taxi from the station. The mansion looming in the distance was no less impressive the second time and Shouta felt the anxiety in his stomach rising, both with the overwhelming feeling the residency caused with its sheer size and the realisation of what he signed up for.
Hizashi put a hand on his knee and squeezed reassuringly. Of course he noticed Shouta was stressed.
“It’s gonna be fun,” he said with a smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners.
Shouta nodded numbly. Sure. Fun. Pretending for two weeks to be a boyfriend of your best friend with whom you happen to be madly, desperately in love with was everyone’s idea of fun.
Once they arrived, Hizashi quickly took their luggage out of the trunk and took Shouta’s hand to lead him into the building. They’ve barely managed to take off their shoes in the genkan - filled with at least a dozen pairs of shoes and boots - when they heard a loud squeal from down the hallway; Shouta barely had time to blink when a flurry of blonde hair assaulted his vision and a young woman in her twenties barrelled into them, throwing her arms over their necks to bring them into a hug.
“Ami!!” Hizashi exclaimed and put his arms around the woman’s neck. “God, you’re so tall,” he giggled, patting her hair.
“So are you, you freaking giraffe!” she exclaimed in response. It may seem like an exaggeration, but compared to her, who seemed to be about 165 cm, it definitely rang true. Both men were over 180 cm.
She turned to Shouta. “Oh my God,” she said excitedly in English, “is that him?”
Shouta frowned. Did Hizashi mention him to his American cousins?
See, contrary to popular belief, Shouta’s English wasn’t bad. In fact, he could understand it quite well and speak a little less well. The only reason his friends thought his language skills were abysmal was because from the get-go, Shouta pretended to understand jackshit so Hizashi had no choice but to tutor him. Even now, when he had English as a mandatory linguistic elective, his best friend helped him.
It was a little white lie Shouta told his friends in order to further torment himself with his crush’s presence.
Hizashi blushed a little, furthering Shouta’s confusion, and introduced him in Japanese, “Ami, this is Shouta. Shouta, this is my cousin, Ami. She’s a year younger than us.”
She beamed, smile so similar to Hizashi’s. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Shouta!” She said in Japanese.
Shouta nodded in response, still a bit confused by the whole interaction and why his friend would be so flustered. He didn’t have time to think on this much though, because suddenly they were surrounded by an army of pre-teens, all chirping their greetings in Japanese, and tugging both men towards the living room.
“Obaasan, Ojiisan! Mums!” Hizashi cheered and ran to give every member of his family a big hug. Shouta hovered in the entrance, more than slightly overwhelmed with the amount of people. He bowed to Hizashi’s grandparents and his mums and scanned the room; it seemed there were about five kids, five or six people their age, and at least six people the age of Hizashi’s parents. It was a lot.
He didn’t have time to get too uncomfortable; Shouta didn’t even notice when Hizashi got by his side, taking his hand and lacing their fingers together.
“Ok, Sho and I are gonna rest a bit after the trip!” He announced.
Shouta looked at him grateful. Four hour trip definitely didn’t require resting and Shouta knew his friend did it to give him some respite from the crowd.
“Oh, I’ll show you your room!” Aki, Hizashi’s mum, stood up and led them in the opposite direction of the rooms they stayed in during summer.
“Mum?” Hizashi asked, curiosity in his voice.
“We figured you may need a room with a bigger bed,” she chuckled, and Shouta’s eyes widened at the implication.
Surely they wouldn’t have to sleep in one bed, right? Sure, it wouldn’t be the first time as they used to have sleepovers but two weeks?
Hizashi’s grip on his hand tightened, and when Shouta looked at him, the freckled cheeks were covered with a blush.
Was he that uncomfortable sharing the bed?
Shouta exhaled slowly just as they stopped in front of the door to their room. Aki bid her goodbye and returned to the rest of the family while Hizashi opened the door to reveal a room much bigger than the ones they stayed in previously, with a plush carpet and kotatsu in the middle and a king sized bed with satin-looking covers. It looked incredibly comfortable and unbearably couple-y.
Hizashi hesitated next to him and then came up to the bed, where he sat gingerly and timidly patted the duvet. “Wanna nap before we face the hellish Yamada family?”
Well, that was a silly question. Shouta wanted to nap about ninety percent of the time.
They settled on the bed after changing into more comfortable clothes, a decent space between them.
So much, in fact, that they were basically falling from the edges. Both were stiff and radiated discomfort, the fake-relationship weighting on them. Shouta could only hope it wouldn’t destroy their friendship.
That was the last thought Shouta had before falling asleep. The next time he blinked, it was already dark outside, and there was an odd weight on his chest. He looked down and saw Hizashi’s head nestled on his chest, the blond clinging to Shouta, not unlike a koala would to a tree.
Instead of freezing up, Shouta chuckled and made himself more comfortable, bringing his arms around Hizashi’s shoulders to hug him tighter. His friend sighed contently and nuzzled into his chest, and Shouta took the opportunity to lean in and press a soft kiss to the top of his head. He lingered, inhaling Hizashi’s shampoo, heart aching with longing.
Much sooner than Shouta would have liked, Hizashi started stirring awake. He eased his embrace and let Hizashi come to his senses slowly. The blond sighed stretched his arms, nearly hitting Shouta, before opening his eyes and gazing up blearily at his friend.
“Hi,” Shouta whispered with a soft smile.
Hizashi smiled, soft and sleepy, and so intimate; “Hello, handsome,” he replied and let his head drop on Shouta’s chest again. He mumbled something against the skin.
Shouta made a questioning noise.
“Do we have to,” Hizashi sighed and rolled off Shouta to stretch his whole body. Briefly, Shouta mourned the loss.
“Weren’t you, like, super happy to meet them?” Shouta asked with amusement.
Hizashi spread out his limbs and flailed, not unlike a distressed starfish.
“I just want to stay in bed with you,” he whined.
Shouta felt his ears heating up. Platonically, he reminded himself, Hizashi just likes to cuddle.
“Come on, we can cuddle all we want after your duties are done,” he said, flipping the covers over and standing up. He extended a hand to Hizashi in an invitation, and the man took it to hoist himself out of bed. He was still pouting though and rested his chin on Shouta’s shoulder. Confused, Shouta snaked his arms around his waist and hugged him. Hizashi let out a happy sigh and they stayed like that for a moment, but eventually the obligations called. Quite literally, they were interrupted by Hanako, Hizashi’s 25 year old cousin, knocking on their door.
“Be right there!” Hizashi said and reluctantly stepped out of Shouta’s embrace.
They dressed up quietly, Shouta’s mind still reeling from the interrupted hug. Sure, Hizashi was tactile but this… this felt different. He couldn’t quite name it but he could feel the electricity in the air between them.
They left hand in hand, their fingers laced together and Shouta prayed to whatever kami might listen that his face wasn’t as red as it felt.
Hanako brought them to the dining area, everyone else was already seated around the low table and the actual feast was spread out. Shouta didn’t think he’d ever seen so much food at once in his life. There were appetisers, miso soup, at least three types of fish and meat and enough rice to feed a small army (or Oboro).
They were seated between the American cousins who immediately drew Hizashi into the conversation. Shouta was content to listen to them, chiming in from time to time but he mostly focused on nibbling on his tuna and wakame.
As the dinner went on, it got louder. It was very loud, in fact, but he should’ve expected that with so many people. Surprisingly enough, he didn’t mind it; as people moved around the room, they approached the couple to greet them, congratulate them and talk a bit. Everyone was as friendly and inviting as Hizashi, and Shouta… he would be lying if he said he hated it, even if it hurt a bit that everyone thought they were a couple. Nevertheless, he felt accepted and at home, something that couldn’t be said about his own family.
After the dinner they moved to the living room and the grandparents focused on Shouta, all welcoming smiles and warm crinkled eyes, insisting that he tell them about his studies. Shouta was more than happy to talk about his teacher’s degree and his minor in psychology and the grandparents listened intently. It was all going well, in Shouta’s opinion, when the dreaded moment arrived.
“We’re so happy for you boys,” Obaasan Rei said and Shouta did his best not to freeze. Or start crying.
“Oh yes. It was so obvious how fond Hizashi is of you when you last came,” Ojisan Akio added. Nodding to himself, he said, “We’ve known it was only a matter of time.”
Shouta bowed and mumbled his thank yous, suddenly wanting to get out of the conversation as soon as possible. His ear heated up at their comments and once again he wondered if he was that obvious. He looked over to Hizashi, a small smile involuntarily gracing his lips. His racing thoughts calmed down the tiniest bit when he looked at his friend.
“Ah, young love,” Rei sighed wistfully and followed his gaze to look at her grandson. She smiled when she saw him deep in the conversation with his cousins, Taguchi and Akari.
“Go join him, I’m sure he already misses you.” Akio nudged Shouta, and he was both relieved and reluctant to go. He did, though, and managed to beeline towards Hizashi without being snatched by another member of the family.
He approached the trio who was standing in the corner and talking in hushed voices; they didn’t notice him coming up, and Shouta hovered, considering interrupting them, when he heard what they were talking about.
“I can’t believe you finally got the guts to ask him out, dude,” Taguchi whispered in English and bumped Hizashi’s shoulder playfully.
“Riiiight!” Akari squealed immediately. “After pining for so long too!”
Hizashi’s face turned bright red, and he elbowed the girl in the ribs. “Not so loud,” he hissed.
The whole conversation was in English, which was odd enough, and Shouta was considering if he misunderstood something. He was fairly certain he knew what ask out and pining was (thanks, Nemuri) but it didn’t apply to their situation. Or maybe Hizashi had an actual boyfriend but didn’t want to introduce him to his family yet? At that thought Shouta felt a chill form in his stomach.
He quietly stepped away from the trio and was immediately drawn into a circle of kids who were playing rock-paper-scissors and wanted him to be a referee.
When he was just about to reach the limit of his socialisation for the day, Hizashi snatched him, excused the both of them, and they made their way to the bedroom. Shouta immediately plopped down on the bed and curled in on himself. Hizashi set up his phone to play a soft, calming playlist - something he had made for Shouta for when he felt overstimulated - and laid down next to his best friend, gentle fingers carefully running through his hair. Shouta leaned into his hand, too tired to pretend it wasn't everything he wanted. His heart was filled with affection for his friend, who had always understood him and helped ground him and never once complained about Shouta’s need for quiet. He loved this man so much.
He dozed off to Hizashi humming along to the tune and his soft touch.