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Daniel’s bought a taser.
He’s standing in the TV room reading the manual. He just clicked the cartridge into place and the thing should be fully operational now.
He bought a taser because, well...because of Armand. Because Armand pisses him off sometimes and sometimes Daniel needs a break. Armand always just keeps going, like a frantic ball of energy. Like a...like a cat! Like how cats will suddenly go crazy and start zooming around the room at four in the morning, bouncing off of furniture and knocking shit over when all you really want is to go to sleep.
Armand is exactly like that, except he’ll zoom all over town, all over the world, dragging Daniel from movie theaters to art galleries to illegal street races to fucking rooster fights.
Daniel loves being with Armand – belonging to Armand – but it can really get exhausting at times.
And you can’t very well go at a vampire with a spray bottle or whack them with a rolled-up newspaper. Well, you could, but it wouldn’t do anything except perhaps exacerbate the situation.
So Daniel got a taser. Just to try. Maybe tasing Armand’s ass will calm him down a little.
“Daniel,” Armand suddenly says from behind him, “this is very kinky, even for us. If you wish for us to further broaden our sexual horizons, you need only ask.”
“What I wish,” Daniel replies, turning around to face Armand and pointing the taser at him, “is for you to stop sneaking up on me like that.”
“But you love surprises,” Armand purrs. He puts his hands on Daniel’s hips, pulls him a little closer and leans in for a kiss.
Daniel dodges him, but only the kiss. Armand’s hands stay on his hips. “I don’t love jump scares,” Daniel replies. “You can be a real scary, annoying fucker, you know that? And sometimes I just wanna...” He points the taser at Armand and mimes shooting it like a gun.
“Such passion, beloved. Such creativity.” Armand pulls him closer so their groins touch.
Daniel rolls his eyes. “See? Like now.”
Armand closes his hand over the taser and pulls it closer towards himself until it’s pressed right up to his breastbone.
“Do it,” he says. There’s something dangerous in his voice. In his eyes.
“You’re crazy.” Daniel tries to pull away but Armand keeps him in place, presses himself more firmly against the front of the taser.
“Taser me, Daniel. Subdue me so you can have it your way for once, instead of me having my way with you. Exhausting you like a bad, bad kitty.”
“That’s not at all why I bought the thi – ”
“Do. It,” Armand repeats. He almost snarls the order.
He’s so annoying. Annoying enough to make Daniel want to – he flips the safety switch and pulls the trigger.
Armand jolts backwards with a yelp, then he falls over onto the sofa, laughing triumphantly.
“Oh,” he breathes. “Mmm. That is very kinky.” He closes his eyes and licks his lips, rolls his hips like he’s seeking friction against the air.
“Yeah?” Daniel asks. “This working for you?” He puts as much sarcasm in his voice as he can, because this is total freak behavior, even for Armand, but Armand does look ridiculously hot like that. Like, really really hot.
“Yes,” Armand replies, his eyes still closed, his body...undulating (Daniel really can’t think of another way to describe it) on the sofa. “You should do it again sometime.” He starts undoing his own pants, his fingers moving so fast Daniel’s eyes can barely keep up. “Now come here. I have need of your mouth.”
***
Two nights later they’re sitting in a gay bar together. It’s a slow night. A really slow night. Daniel’s two grasshoppers and a shot of tequila in and he’s bored out of his mind.
Armand is bored, too, but less so. His head is tipped slightly to the side and Daniel can tell he’s scanning the thoughts of the people around them.
“Do you see that man in the faded orange shirt?” Armand asks. “Right behind me?”
Daniel takes a quick look over Armand’s shoulder, his eyes flicking up and back at Armand in less than two seconds.
“Yeah.”
“He thinks you and I look very enticing together. He’d like to... That’s an interesting turn of phrase. He’d like to be the filling in our sandwich.”
Daniel snorts and downs his second shot of tequila.
“Do you find him attractive?” Armand asks. “We could invite him to come with us. See if we can salvage the night.”
Daniel chances another look. The man catches his eye and gives Daniel a little Hey nod. He looks eager. Too eager.
“Nah. Do you want him?”
Armand turns around on his barstool, looks the man up and down in an unsubtle appraisal. Then he shakes his head and turns to face Daniel again. “No. Not like that at least...”
Suddenly Armand’s eyes go wide. He spins back around. The guy has taken the earlier hint and looks like he’s preparing to leave.
“Daniel, give me the thing,” Armand says urgently. He tugs at Daniel’s messenger bag while following the guy with his eyes. The guy's putting on his jacket and moving towards the exit.
“Arma – ”
“Give me the taser, Daniel. He’s leaving.”
Daniel splutters in protest and slaps at Armand’s hands. “Get off! I’ll get it. Christ.”
Thirty seconds later they stumble into the alley behind the bar. Armand’s dragging Daniel along with one hand and holding the taser behind his back with the other.
Their target is about 90 feet ahead of them. “You left without us,” Armand calls out after him.
The man stops walking and turns around to face them. His face lights up a little when he recognizes them. “I didn’t think you were interested.”
“We are,” Armand purrs. He keeps walking towards their mark, Daniel one step behind. “My friend here’s just a little shy. But I’m not.”
The guy looks from Armand to Daniel (who does his best to look shy) and back to Armand. “You wanna have some fun?” he asks with a grin.
“Oh, I love fun.” Armand lets go of Daniel’s hand and slings his arm around the man’s neck. The man looks like he can’t believe his luck and Daniel almost feel bad for him. But he wants to see what happens.
He's pretty sure that's the only reason why Armand is doing this as well; just to see what happens.
Armand’s other hand comes up, too, slowly. Armand presses the taser against the man’s chest, just over his heart, and pulls the trigger.
The man shouts, longer than Armand did. Five protracted seconds of agony. Once the taser stops firing, he slumps to the ground, passed out.
Daniel laughs riotously then claps both his hands over his own mouth. “I’m a terrible person,” he whispers through his fingers.
Armand hums noncommittally and Daniel laughs again.
Armand holds the taser out for Daniel to take back while looking down on his victim. Daniel quickly puts the thing back in his bag.
“Rise,” Armand tells the unconscious form on the ground and it does. It’s really creepy but also pretty awesome, even if it does bring back some memories Daniel could do without.
Daniel can’t stop staring.
Armand takes hold of the guy’s chin to turn his face away from him and expose his neck. “Look away, my love.”
Daniel knows Armand is talking to him, and not the guy. Armand wouldn’t call a stranger that. Only Daniel. “What? Why?”
“I’m going to drain him now.”
“What, right in front of me?”
“Yes.”
“And I’m not allowed to watch?”
“You are not.”
Well, this is some bullshit. Armand’s never let Daniel watch him kill before so maybe he shouldn’t be surprised, but he just zapped the guy right in front of him. Just for shits and giggles. With Daniel’s taser!
“You wish to be more complicit in his death than you already are?” Armand asks. There’s no judgement in the question. Armand seems genuinely curious about Daniel’s motivations.
Daniel wonders if this is what makes him fascinating.
Probably not. Surely he’s not the first human with a morbid obsession with death.
“I mean, you don’t have to phrase it like that.” Daniel pulls his hands up inside the sleeves of his jacket. “I just wanna watch,” he pouts. "You like to watch, too, right?”
The guy they’re talking about killing is still just standing there. Or maybe ‘hanging’ would be a better description, though his feet are on the ground.
“Watching people have sex is very different to watching people die, Daniel,” Armand says. “In most cases.”
“Please. Babe.”
Armand sighs. “I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?”
Daniel shakes his head. “You won’t. I promise.”
“Very well.”
Armand leans towards the exposed neck in front of him. Daniel can see his fangs elongate just before they plunge in.
Daniel lets out a small gasp. He can feel his heart pounding, his blood rushing places.
It looks so intimate and gentle. Beautiful. The guy is still unconscious. He doesn’t respond in any way, doesn’t even know he’s being killed. Daniel can’t help but feel a little jealous.
Daniel doesn’t know how long it lasts.
It’s 3AM but when he pulls away, Armand tips his head back like he’s trying to feel the sun shine on his face. He stays like that for a while, his eyes closed, savoring the moment.
Then he straightens up, opens his eyes and looks straight into Daniel’s soul.
Daniel feels like he’s just had a religious experience. He’s still having one. Armand is a god and Daniel wants him. Wants to crawl into him and let Armand crawl into him in return.
Daniel lunges forward and kisses his god, hungrily, greedily.
Armand indulges him, kisses back, one hand on the back of Daniel’s neck, the other on Daniel’s ass.
Armand’s mouth is still warm and coppery from his victim’s blood. The victim Daniel helped lure to his death. He should feel bad about it but he doesn’t. He can’t.
Armand is the Devil and Daniel is his.
He whines when Armand breaks the kiss. He wants more – needs more.
“Now do me,” Armand says. His pupils are enormous, irises nearly gone. He looks like Daniel feels; horny and high.
“What?” Daniel asks.
“This is the third time tonight you have yelled ‘What?’ at me like an unmannered lout. Is your hearing troubling you, Daniel, or are you simply being impertinent?”
“No, I – ”
“You have a second cartridge in your bag, don’t you? Load it into the device and discharge it into me.”
Armand pulls his shirt from his pants and undoes the first few buttons from the bottom up. He’s wearing high-rise pants and he unbuttons those, too. Pushes them down a little. Daniel can see some of his pubes peeking out.
“Right here.” Armand taps the spot where he wants Daniel to taser him with his index finger. “Daniel.”
“Right.” Daniel fumbles the taser and the second cartridge out of his bag, somehow manages to click them together without zapping himself, and presses the weapon against Armand’s lower belly.
Armand nods at him and Daniel fires.
Armand yells something in Arabic. Daniel doesn’t understand the words, but Armand’s body language speaks volumes and Daniel gathers that the exclamation translates roughly as, “Fuck, yes!”
Armand grabs Daniel by the back of the neck and roughly pulls him in for another kiss. He still tastes like blood.
“Take off your trousers,” Armand orders when they break apart.
Daniel’s about to hit him with another What? but he doesn’t get the chance. Armand grabs his hips, spins him around and crowds him up against the nearest wall so fast Daniel’s face nearly hits the rough bricks.
Before he knows it, Armand is inside of him.
Armand fucks him so hard and so good it leaves Daniel reeling. Right then and there, up against the wall, with their victim lying right behind them.
Fuck, Daniel thinks while he climaxes, fuck! He really should taser Armand more often.