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“You can, you know.”
Zooble was snapped out of their thoughts by Kinger’s whisper. They turned their attention from the digital fishtank, eyebrows quirking in confusion. “Uh… I can what?”
Kinger took a moment to glance over his shoulder at Ragatha and Gangle, who were preoccupied talking about some anime or other. Then, he leaned in, with a conspiratorial glimmer in his eyes. “You can have sex!”
Zooble’s surprised blink was accompanied by a comical sound effect.
“Not in the traditional sense, of course,” Kinger elaborated, “But… if you get creative, there are plenty of ways to feel nice here. Caine just doesn’t like to talk about it.”
“Um… okay. Okay,” Zooble lowered their own voice and leaned forward, deciding that this conversation may as well happen. “...How, exactly? Is there some sort of Konami code that’ll give me my p[BLILP!]y back? ”
“Ah, not quite… but I’m afraid that is a journey you must take on your own,” Despite his lack of a mouth, Zooble could hear the sly smile in Kinger’s voice. Then, his tone got more serious: “I know it’s hard here, believe me. But if you can’t find the things that bring you joy, you have to create it yourself. And don’t be afraid to ask for help.”
“...Right.” Zooble’s antennae twitched. “You don’t mean– you’re not trying to–”
“Oh, gosh, me? No! I haven’t done that with anyone since my wife abstracted.”
“Your what?”
“My what?” Kinger shouted, looking around frantically, before turning back to Zooble. “Oh, Zooble! When did you get here?”
“...And you’re gone again. Okay.” Zooble sighed, leaning their elbows on their knees and placing their triangular head in their hands. They turned back to the fishtank, watching the sea creatures swim by in predetermined, looping animations. It was funny… every once in a while, things would click into place, and they’d find themself… almost enjoying the circus. The gun adventure hadn’t been bad, and hanging out with Gangle–
But it wasn’t sustainable. Trying to build joy– build a life here– wasn’t worth it, in the end. Otherwise, they’d just get stuck in the same simulated loop.
-
But despite their practiced nihilism, Kinger’s words refused to leave Zooble’s head, even as they tried to drown it in Stupid Sauce (Which Caine sobered them up from at the end of the awards show, what a buzzkill). As they detached their horns and extra arms for the night and tossed them into their toy chest, they were suddenly struck by a needling curiosity. Creative, huh…
Well, Zooble may not have a pussy anymore, but they were certainly not lacking in holes…
Zooble removed their black-striped arm with a small pop, then extended their pointer and middle finger. They brought the detached limb to their face, scrutinizing the shape and texture. Like the rest of their pieces, it was made of a hard, plasticky material. Usually Zooble hated how fake it felt, but for this… well, plastic wasn’t the worst option.
Slowly, Zooble sat down on their bed and detached one of their legs. They craned their neck to see the hole in their beanlike body– like the rest of the holes, it was rimmed with a white circle.
Close enough?
Zooble brought their detached hand to the hole, placing its palm on the rim. They rubbed at the spot, slowly at first, then getting a bit faster…
Nothing.
“Well,” Zooble said aloud, “This is probably going to hurt like a b[FLOOP!]ch, with my luck.”
Without another thought on the topic, they plunged their two fingers into the hole.
The sensation was immediate. It wasn’t exactly like what they were accustomed to when masturbating– could this be called masturbating?– but it was closer than they’d felt in months. Something was inside them, something cold and smooth, and they could feel it even though it wasn’t touching their walls. Something in the back of Zooble’s brain reminded them of the experiments they used to perform in elementary school, with two magnets repelling each other– the space inside of them felt like that.
Clearly, they weren’t supposed to be poking around in there. The thought made Zooble incredibly happy.
They scissored their fingers open, trying to get a feel for the rest of the space. As their fingers moved and wiggled, the odd feeling persisted, a funny sort of pressure building within them. Unfortunately, they could only reach as far as their knuckles into the hole before the rest of the hand stopped them. If only Zooble had something smaller, or maybe more flexible, like–
And don’t be afraid to ask for help
Zooble stared at themself in the mirror, slowly withdrawing their hand.
No.
They shouldn’t.
They couldn’t.
Besides the fact that it was out of nowhere, besides the fact that it was their best friend in this hellscape, besides the fact that engaging in a sexual relationship could ruin everything– logistically, how would they even approach the situation? What were they going to do, walk up to Gangle’s room in the dead of night, interrupt her sleep, and say ‘Hey Gangle, wanna put yourself inside me?’
It was a horrible idea, the worst Zooble had ever conceived.
And before they knew it, they were standing outside of Gangle’s door.
The portrait of Gangle stared back at them, its ever-present smile taunting Zooble. Zooble never liked the portrait– it didn’t do a good job of showing the real Gangle, only what this stupid circus wanted them to be. It wasn’t fair.
Gangle… watching them fire that tommy gun today was… well. Zooble wasn’t too proud to admit they were proud, that Gangle had come so far since they’d met. Gangle deserved so much better than this stupid circus.
Maybe… she deserved some genuine, human connection?
Zooble steeled themself, then knocked on Gangle’s door. The sound echoed through the empty hallway, and Zooble winced. Fuck, hope nobody heard that…
The door opened a bit too quickly. And suddenly Gangle was right in front of them, staring with her wide eyes. “Zooble? W-what are you doing here?”
“Heyyyy, Gangle…” Zooble leaned against the doorframe, then straightened up when they realized they probably looked like a douchebag. Okay, now they had to approach this delicately–
“Wanna put yourself inside me?” they blurted.
Shit.
Gangle stared, teardrops quivering on their mask with some unknowable emotion. “I– you want me– huh?”
“Sorry, I– stupid, this is stupid, you don’t have to– I’m sorry, okay? I was just– forget all about it–” Zooble stammered.
A small ribbon suddenly covered where Zooble’s mouth would be, and they tasted fabric. It was a strange enough sensation to shut them up.
“Zooble…” Gangle said slowly, “Is this about what you asked Caine about earlier?”
Zooble didn’t want to answer. They stared daggers into the floor, and they were certain if they could still blush that their face would be as red as the pink triangle of their avatar. But Gangle was expecting an answer, so… they nodded. “Look, I–”
“Yes.”
“Huh?”
“Yes Zooble, I will have sex with you.” Gangle spoke quickly but forcefully, a shaky smile forming on her mouth.
The reality of the situation hit Zooble again, and they hesitated. “You– you’re sure you want this, righ–”
They were cut off by the ribbon reappearing, this time grabbing one of their arms and pulling them inside. Zooble let out a small yelp as they were flung backwards onto a plush, velvety bedding.
Quick as a flash, Gangle closed the door behind them. Zooble heard the small click of a lock. Then Gangle turned back to face them, teardrops glittering in the lamplight.
“Um, so, okay– oh, I can’t believe this is happening!” Gangle’s arms flew to her mouth as though trying to hide her grin. “I– Zooble, you don’t know how long I’ve wanted this…”
“You– wait, really?” Zooble squeaked. “You mean, like, with me, specifically?”
“Well… yeah!”
“I didn’t realize you felt that way.” Zooble sat up on the bed, eyes getting wide.
Gangle scratched the back of her neck. “I didn’t think I was being very subtle, heh…”
“I just– why me?”
“You’re just so cool, and strong, and your voice is so gravelly and low and… mmmph…” Gangle sank lower behind her hands, still smiling. “You’re… Zooble!”
Zooble felt their heart swell. “Oh. Uh. Yeah. Thanks, Gangle.”
The pair waited in the quiet for a brief moment, before Gangle let out a little hum. “So, um, I’ve– I’ve noticed that sometimes, if I touch this bit of ribbon–” she gestured to the end of the spiraled ribbon that composed her body– “It feels sort of weirdly nice? Um, I’m not sure how we could… use that…”
“Wow, has everyone in this circus been jerking it except for me?” Zooble wondered aloud.
“Wh– who else did you–?”
Zooble shook their head, chuckling slightly. “It was actually Kinger who gave me the idea to– uh– start exploring myself, let’s say. He was weird and cryptic about it, though… And he said something about his wife?”
“Huh,” Gangle offered. Then, “Wait, you think this has anything to do with the door that’s got the Queen chesspiece on it? I’ve always been curious about that, but I– y’know, seemed insensitive to bring it up…”
“There’s a door with a Queen chesspiece?”
“Yeah! It’s– WAIT, WE’RE GETTING DISTRACTED!” Gangle suddenly exclaimed. “WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX!”
“Right!” Zooble said, feeling their eyes crinkle in amusement. “Alright, so, uh… this may be a little strange…” They bent down, pulling their leg out of its socket.
“Oh! Your limb holes?”
“Yeah. Like you said, it feels weirdly nice.”
“Okay!” Gangle said. “So, uh, I guess I’ll just… stick it in there!”
Neither of them moved.
This time, Zooble was the one to break the tension. “Okay, uh, full disclosure, I usually– well, back before the circus, I was typically the one, uh… putting it in, you know? So sorry if I’m… bad.”
Gangle let out a huff of air that slowly morphed into a laugh. “Zooble, I… I’m sure you’ll be great.”
“Appreciate the vote of confidence,” Zooble said, getting into a more comfortable position on the bed.
Gangle stepped forward, and Zooble watched with anticipation as the ribbon at the end of their body began to unfurl. It wove through the air like a cobra ready to strike, and Zooble swallowed. “Didn’t know you could control your ribbons like that,” they commented, reaching a hand out.
“Yeah… it’s a bit strange but– oh!”
Gangle was cut off as Zooble’s hand brushed the tip of the ribbon. Zooble watched as a scribbly smile formed on her porcelain face. “Feels good?”
“Y-yeah– oh, but I’m supposed to be– in you, right?”
“Mmm. Just a sec, I want to try something.” Zooble allowed Gangle’s ribbon to settle in the palm of their hand. The tip was trembling slightly with anticipation, fluttering against their palm like a butterfly wing…
“So delicate…” Zooble mused. “Let’s take this slow, okay?”
“Oh, oka-–y–yyy!”
Zooble began to trail their fingertips up and down the length of the ribbon, feeling the vibrations increase like the strings of a guitar. Gangle whined, hands balling into knots as she leaned forward.
Before they really processed what they were doing, Zooble was rising to meet her, ribbon in hand. Their plastic face was soon only inches from Gangle’s mask, close enough that one of Gangle’s tears slid onto Zooble’s cheeks. The water was warm.
“O-oh, Zooble,” Gangle breathed, smile growing. “C-can I– can we?”
Zooble was uncertain if she was asking about permission or logistics– after all, it was hard to kiss when only one party had a mouth. “Well… only one way to find out.” Leaning closer, Zooble shut their eyes and allowed their faces to touch.
The cool texture of porcelain flooded Zooble’s mouth, mixed sporadically with the unexpected taste of ink– was that what her mouth was painted with?– that reminded Zooble of their time as a tattoo artist. The taste was comforting, the texture smooth and inviting, and Zooble leaned in further.
Gangle nuzzled their mask into Zooble’s face, and the ribbon in Zooble’s hand began to wind around their finger. Zooble used their other arm to gently grab the front of Gangle’s mask and leaned backwards, allowing themself to lie down fully on the bed.
Gangle began to giggle, and the ribbon around Zooble’s finger tightened. Zooble sucked in a breath, an idea occurring to them. “Okay, you ready?”
“Y-yeah,” Gangle purred, pulling back ever so slightly so that Zooble could see their face. Fresh tears had sprung onto their mask, and they glistened in the low lighting of the room. Her dark eyes were crescent shaped with pleasure, and her smile was wide. She was.. beautiful.
“Alright, pretty girl,” Zooble softly teased, leaning upward to approach where Gangle’s ears would be. “What was that you mentioned about my voice, again?”
“Z-Zooble…” The ribbon continued to constrict as Gangle whined.
“Oh, needy, are we?” Zooble managed to raise an eyebrow, despite the fact that they were similarly shaking with anticipation as Gangle writhed on top of them. “You wanna go inside me?”
“Y-yeah– yeah, please, yes–” Gangle panted.
“Hmm… I dunno…” Zooble was being mean now, and they knew it. They were pretty sure their finger would have lost circulation long ago had it still been made of flesh. “You don’t seem that enthusiastic…”
Gangle took a shuttering breath in. “I want to be inside you!”
Zooble felt themself go warm, and took a second to swallow before proceeding. “Well, if you put it like that…”
Shifting slightly on the bed, Zooble positioned their arm so that the finger with the ribbon could reach their leg hole. Then, with a final deep breath, they pushed it in, hard.
It all happened so fast. The ribbon was loosening, spinning out of control, and Zooble could feel it as it unraveled in quick spirals. Their chest heaved with pleasure as more ribbon rushed in to fill empty space, undulating about in a dizzying dance Zooble could only imagine. Zooble’s eyes unfocused, but through the haze of double vision they noticed that Gangle’s arms had disappeared, alongside most of her torso. Only enough ribbon remained to suspend her mask above their face, delighted smile multiplying in Zooble’s vision.
“Ohhhh, oh f[BOINK]k, s[PLOOP]t, F[WHEEP]K!” Zooble shouted, feeling their own tears spring into the corner of their mismatched eyes. They felt so full, satiated in a way they hadn’t been in a long time. They could barely think over the pressure in their stomach, the feeling of soft satin rubbing against their walls, soft and smooth and perfect.
“You’re perfect,” Zooble breathed.
After what might have been an eternity (but was still too short), the storm inside Zooble slowed. Slowly, Gangle began to slide out of Zooble, soft and slick. Zooble gave one last shudder at the sensation. “Wow,” was all they could manage.
“Heh, yeah. Wow.” Gangle echoed their words as her body reformed into its original spiral, then laid down next to Zooble. “Thank you.”
The couple laid still for a while, breathing in the silence. Then, Gangle began to speak: “Um, I should– well, I should probably let you know– uh– well, I’m not sure if this even counts, but– um–”
“Hey, it’s okay,” Zooble said softly. “...First time with someone who wasn’t a guy?”
“Mmgh… first time, period.” Gangle’s ribbons formed knots at their sides. “Which, I know, is kind of embarrassing, but– I’m not squeamish or anything, I just…”
“Never found the right person?” Zooble guessed.
Gangle went quiet. “I thought I had, a few times. I guess they never agreed, heh.”
“Ah.” Zooble placed their hand on the rim of Gangle’s mask, tilting her head to face them. “Well… their loss. I’m honored to be your first.”
Fresh tears sprang into Gangle’s eyes, and Zooble brushed one away with their thumb. “Ah, Zooble… I don’t deserve someone like you.”
“Well… you’ve got me. And I’ve got you too, okay?”
“...Yeah. More than okay.”
-
Zooble slept well that night.