Chapter Text
Prolog
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The waves.
It was the only thing I heard.
I was floating.
It felt like being free for the first time since I could think.
Without my brain burning.
Free from the pain.
Free from the unknowing.
Free from guilt.
Free from the person I was becoming.
That I have been for a long time.
Deep inside. Or not so deep.
It was all clear when I was with you.
You.
After the short feeling of freedom there was pain. In my chest, my face, my shoulder. My whole body ached. It felt familiar.
All too familiar.
Realization.
I wasn‘t dead.
Coughing the waves out of my lungs. It felt real.
Blood washed away in the sea.
My eyes opening.
You.
Your body laying on the shore, swept there by the waves, facing the sky, moonlight hitting you. Eyes closed.
I crawled out of the shallow sea, slowly reaching you.
My full body still on the ground. Too hard to get up.
I stretched out my hand and put it on your chest. I waited until I felt something.
A slow beat.
I try to get my upper body up, heaving my head to your chest.
I looked to your face, your eyes open just slightly, looking at me. You put your hand on my back to feel for the same. For life.
We share the pain in this moment. We know it, we feel it, all too often. I feel your agony and you feel mine.
We blurr.
This was the most human I have ever seen you. Hurt, vulnerable, weak.
Beautiful.
I couldn‘t let you die. Not with me living.
There was no life without you anymore. I tried it before and I don‘t want to try it again.
I know now what is right for me. You knew it all along.
My eyes couldn‘t leave you even though it took me so much to keep them open.
You struggling with the same. But your eyes not leaving me for more than a second.
„Will“
Your voice.
Just a whisper.
It was all I needed.
„Hannibal“