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“Daengie!” Yushi called out to the younger as he ran towards him, across the park they were in.
Daeyoung gave a small smile, opening his arms for Yushi to jump into. “Looks like someone’s in a good mood today.” He brings his hand up to push the hair out of Yushi’s eyes.
”I haven’t seen you in days, I missed you so so sooooo much!” Yushi buried his face in the taller boys chest, wrapping his arms around his waist.
”I’m sorry my love, I’ve just been busy with things at home, I should have called at least.” Daeyoung threads his fingers through Yushi’s hair, gently combing through it as they stand there in each others embrace.
The two walked around in silence for a while, hand in hand. Yushi was happy he finally got to be with his boyfriend after not seeing or talking to him in almost a week. Daeyoung on the other hand, felt troubled. He hoped Yushi wouldn’t notice the way his hands were slightly shaking, his breathing uneven, he hoped it wasn’t obvious that there was a storm brewing inside him that he didn’t know how to stop.
It feels like the storm is getting too strong, it’s bound to take over fully at any moment.
”Yushi,” They stopped walking, Yushi turned to look at Daeyoung, a questioning look on his face.
”You know I’ll always love you, right?”
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”Yushi, you should try to get some sleep..” Riku peeks his head into his best friends room, seeing the younger boy sitting with his back against the headboard as he stared at the wall in front of him.
Riku walked over, cautiously sitting on the edge of the bed, not wanting to alarm the boy. “Ushi.. This isn’t healthy.. Please you need to rest..”
Yushi blinked, eyes still focused on the wall, his expression is empty, but Riku can see the tears rolling down his cheeks. Seeing him like this breaks something inside him every single time, and he hates that there’s nothing he can do to make all of his pain go away.
”Daeyoung..?” Yushi was now looking at Riku, eyes widened slightly. “Is it really you?”
Riku could feel his heart shatter in that moment, he hadn’t heard Yushi speak properly in weeks and he didn’t expect it to be like this at all. He knows Yushi had been mumbling to himself, staring at certain places around him as if he’s talking to someone.
While Riku is trying his best to not break down, carefully helping Yushi out of the episode he was in, Sion stood in the doorway watching, a hand covering his mouth to muffle the sobs that threatened to escape.
Seeing Yushi confuse Riku for Daeyoung was a breaking point for them. They knew something was happening, Sion knew exactly what it was.
Daeyoung has been dead for 3 months now.
And Yushi had begun to develop broken heart syndrome right after it happened.
After Riku finally got Yushi to sleep, he and Sion slipped out of the room, closing the door behind them. Sion immediately pulled Riku into his embrace, his quiet sobs the only sound in the empty hospital hallways.
”I know he doesn’t realize.. But it hurts so fucking much Sion..” Riku could feel his chest aching, his sobs coming out in uneven breaths. “I can’t lose him too..”
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Daeyoung and Yushi had been best friends since they were kids. The two were basically glued at the hip, they were inseparable. Daeyoung is somewhere? Yushi is there too. See one of them running? The other isn’t too far behind.
They didn’t realize they had feelings for each other until their early teens, Daeyoung confessed to Yushi under the starlit sky in the park. Yushi loved how Daeyoung’s eyes sparkled in the moonlight.
Riku and Sion came into their lives in middle school, all four of them immediately became close. When the other two learned that their best friends were finally together, they couldn’t help but cheer loudly, earning a few groans and shushes from the people around them that were trying to study.
One thing Daeyoung had always dealt with on his own was his mental health. He knew it was declining, he just didn’t want to burden anyone with his problems.
Sometime along the way, Yushi found out about Daeyoung’s diagnoses, severe depression and anxiety. He thought about it for a long time, recalling times where Daeyoung acted weirdly or seemed even the slightest bit off.
After the day he found out, he made it his mission to always be there for Daeyoung no matter what, always making sure he was feeling okay. He knew there were days where Daeyoung would lie just to make him feel at ease, but he still did everything he could to take care of him.
But doing your best isn’t always enough, right?
The night Daeyoung and Yushi met in the park after not having contact for a week, Yushi could sense that something was off, he just couldn’t put a finger on it.
He tried so hard to shake the feeling, wanting to focus on spending time with Daeyoung. But the moment those words left his boyfriends mouth, the anxiety crept back up.
”You know I’ll always love you, right?”
Yushi wanted to stay by Daeyoung’s side for the rest of the night, but the younger insisted that he should go home. He tried to refuse, tried so hard to convince Daeyoung to let him stay, but he wouldn’t give in.
Daeyoung sighed, placing a soft kiss on Yushi’s forehead, then his nose, then finally his lips.
”I love you, Yushi. No matter what.”
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He should have fought harder, he should have held onto Daeyoung as tight as he could so he would have no choice but to let him stay. But he didn’t. And now he lives with that regret forever.
He sees him sometimes. Daeyoung. He hangs out in the hospital room with him late at night, either when Sion and Riku are asleep or when Yushi is alone. It makes Yushi happy, seeing him there with him.
He talks to him, asking questions like how he’s been and why he did it. He never received an answer, just an apologetic look from the younger, and concerned looks from the two older boys from across the room.
”Three months..” Yushi looks over at the boy beside him. “You’ve been gone for three months and still haven’t told me why.. Why did you have to leave me, Daeng?” The younger boy let out a sigh, holding out his hand for Yushi to take.
Yushi looked at him confused, but took his hand anyways. It was surprisingly warm to the touch, a feeling he knew all too well, one that he missed so much.
”Let’s walk and chat, shall we?” Daeyoung spoke, making Yushi look at him in shock, he thought he couldn’t speak.
The two made their way out of the hospital room hand in hand, talking about everything that was on their minds.
What Yushi didn’t hear, however, was the constant beeping of the machine in his room, the sobbing from Sion, the screaming from Riku.
”Call it.”
”Tokuno Yushi, time of death 2:43 a.m.”
Cause of death: Broken Heart
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