Chapter Text
Author’s Note
I’m adding this here because I’ve seen a few comments questioning whether this work is AI-generated, and honestly, I no longer have the energy to keep addressing it individually.
For clarity: this story began as part of a book project I was working on long before I ever posted it here. The core premise already existed in an earlier draft, written before my current novel project, Sonder. I eventually set that version aside because the characters did not yet have the emotional depth or complexity I wanted.
After reading Heated Rivalry and The Long Game, and later watching the show, I felt inspired to return to that old premise and reshape it around Shane and Ilya. That means a lot of the bones of the story already existed before posting, which is why some updates have come quickly. What you are reading now is a heavily revised, expanded, and reworked version of something I had already written.
Because of that, earlier chapters are also being continuously edited and expanded as the story develops. Some scenes have been rewritten entirely, new material has been added, and certain dynamics have been deepened for continuity and emotional build-up. If you read the earliest versions of the fic, you’ll probably notice differences.
I also want to clarify that while I’m borrowing these characters from Rachel Reid’s universe, this is ultimately still my interpretation of them. I’m trying very hard to maintain the emotional essence of Shane, Ilya, and the Game Changers world, but over the course of such a long and psychologically heavy story, they will inevitably feel different in some ways from Rachel’s original characterisations. That isn’t me trying to “replace” canon — it’s simply the nature of transformative work and long-form reinterpretation.
Several supporting characters have also been added or expanded, including Morris, Markovich, Dev, Aaron, Farah, and others connected to the investigation, media, security, and team dynamics surrounding the central story. Morris and Markovich, especially, are entirely original characters created for this fic. Some of these characters actually existed in the very first version of the project years ago, and I initially thought I should remove them when adapting the story into the Game Changers universe. Over time, though, I realised they added depth, realism, and emotional texture to the narrative, which is part of why the earlier chapters have undergone such major revisions and expansions.
The earliest version of this premise was written during my late pregnancy and early postpartum period with my first child, when I was on bed rest and had an unusual amount of time to write. I spent long stretches of the day working on it with headphones on and a very depressing playlist, because apparently that was the emotional climate I chose.
Writing has always been deeply personal to me. I’ve been writing short stories since I was thirteen, and it has always felt like a space that belongs to me.
I know I said before that I would not let these comments get to me, but the truth is that they do. Even when they seem small or silly, they create a background anxiety that makes it harder to enjoy writing and sharing this story.
Please also read this story with care.
This fic is intentionally heavy and explores serious topics in significant emotional detail, including kidnapping, captivity, coercive control, psychological abuse, trauma, dissociation, panic attacks, self-harm ideation, non-consensual sexual situations, injury, recovery, and the long-term aftermath of violence and emotional manipulation.
A large part of the story focuses not only on trauma itself, but on what happens afterward — shame, survival responses, disrupted identity, fear surrounding intimacy and touch, depression, anxiety, and the complicated process of trying to feel like a person again after something devastating.
Please prioritise your wellbeing over finishing the story.
If you are struggling, or if any part of this fic becomes overwhelming, please consider reaching out to someone you trust or using one of the support services below:
UK & ROI – Samaritans
Call 116 123 (free, 24/7)
Samaritans
USA & Canada – 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
Call or text 988
988 Lifeline
Australia – Lifeline Australia
Call 13 11 14
Lifeline Australia
International crisis support directory:
FindAHelpline
And finally — thank you to everyone who has supported this work, read it in good faith, commented kindly, and allowed the story to grow and change as I continue revising it. Your encouragement has meant more to me than you probably realise.