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“Harukawa-san, are you busy?”
Maki lifts her gaze. She heard Kaede come into the dining hall and had been listening the entire time as the other girl made her way across the room on trepidatious feet, but a part of her hadn’t expected to actually be approached. She sort of thought she made her feelings about socialising in this place obvious, yet when she studies Kaede’s face, she finds a lopsided smile and a hopeful tug at the corner of her lip, like she still has some kind of expectation.
There’s nothing all that wrong with that, Maki supposes. It’s only natural to have expectations… but Kaede is most definitely barking up the wrong tree right now.
Still, Maki fidgets with her bracelet and shrugs. “Not really. There isn’t a lot to be busy with here.”
“That’s true!” Kaede agrees. Her thumbs hook over the straps on her backpack and she rocks from her heels to the balls of her feet, then back again. “...Well, if you’re not busy, would you like to spend some time together? I thought we could have some tea, or if you’re not interested in that, then something else…?”
Maki stops fidgeting and frowns into Kaede’s smiling face. “Why?”
“Eh?” Kaede blinks, looking a bit surprised, but shrugs. “I mean, I’m not busy either, so…”
“Is Saihara busy?” Maki questions. She leans forward and props her hands against her knees. “Could you not find someone else to bother?” That sounds unlikely. Statistically speaking, the odds of fourteen people all being too busy to make time for Kaede and her tea hankering… well, Maki thinks they’re low, not that she ever got a formal education in math. More importantly, most of the idiots here really like Kaede, and would probably be foaming at the mouth for the chance to spend time with her. That’s certainly true of people like Tenko and Kaito, so Maki can’t make sense of why Kaede would choose to proposition her of all people.
Unless she finds them as grating as Maki does, but Kaede doesn’t really seem like the type, always prattling on about friendship. She’s got to have some other reason.
“I-Is it that weird to want to spend time with you?” Kaede huffs and folds her arms across her chest. “Why the interrogation? I want to make friends with everyone here, you know that?”
“Yes,” Maki says flatly, then clarifies, “it is weird.” Losing patience, she stands and moves past Kaede, angling towards the door. She stops, or rather is stopped, by the feel of Kaede’s hand on her wrist.
Before Maki can even snap her arm away, Kaede withdraws. Her touch had been gentle, barely-there, probably some side effect of having pianist’s fingers. Not that Maki would know. Her hands are soft if a bit clammy and cool at the fingertips, lacking all the callouses that make Maki’s own such an eyesore.
Out of courtesy, Maki stops, but only for a moment to hear what Kaede has to say. “What?”
“Why are you so—” Kaede trips over her words, sounding frustrated. “Cold, all the time?”
Maki tugs at the bottom of her shirt and frowns. She has no idea how to answer a question like that. What else should she be? “Do you think I should be warmer because of my talent?”
“Well—yes!” Kaede huffs. “But more than that, it just—don’t you ever get lonely, Harukawa-san? I don’t mind if you’re nervous, or—or new to this, I’m new to having friends too, but you don’t have to… push me away so strongly, you know that? I mean, I’m not going to bite you.” She lets out a little, nervous-sounding laugh. “I’d almost be okay with it if I thought it was just that you hate me so much, but it seems like you’re like this with anyone who wants to spend time with you…”
At least that part is apt; Maki’s rejection of Kaede has nothing to do with her personally. She just isn’t built to maintain something like a ‘friendship’ and hasn’t been for years. The last friend she had, she killed with her own hands, and the last friend before that died in a car accident while she became a monster to keep her safe. So suffice to say, it’s not exactly an experience Maki is keen on repeating…
But even if that weren’t the case, in a situation like this, Maki would be lying implicitly if she chose to spend time around Kaede. If she chose to open herself up a little, but only halfway, and befriend her under false pretenses—Kaede wouldn’t want to be friends with a murderer if she had all the information, would she? And it isn’t like Maki can tell her the truth. Even if she wasn’t forbidden from revealing herself, it’d be as good as painting a bright red target on her back in the midst of a killing game.
Maki sighs. “You’re taking it personally. This is just how I am.”
“I don’t believe you,” Kaede asserts. “You’ve got to be putting on some kind of front.”
“Do you really think everyone in the world is nice?” Maki grouses, looking over her shoulder. “You’re going to get yourself hurt if you keep believing that.”
Kaede pouts at her when their eyes meet. “I don’t believe anything like that, it just—you’re just—” Her hands ball into fists and she stamps her foot, declaring, “You’re too cute to be so brusque! You have to have some kind of soft side that you’re hiding! I just know it!”
Maki’s mouth falls open and stays that way. It’s just not the emotional appeal she was expecting. Kaede’s face flushes, so it’s obvious she realises how stupid it is what she just said, but she holds her ground, and out of a lack of options, Maki merely sinks back down to sit in the chair she was occupying a moment ago. She feels utterly dumbfounded.
At least it makes Kaede beam at her. “So you’ll have tea with me?”
“I guess,” Maki says, her head still spinning. “Your logic is—” It’s truly indescribable. Maki has never known someone like Kaede before.
She has the audacity to giggle in response to Maki’s stupefied look. “Yeah, I know. To be honest, I’m not that intuitive about people. I just think what I want to think.” She swings her backpack from her shoulder and sets it in the seat across from Maki. “I’ll set up a teapot for us. Is green tea okay? It’s just going to be from a bag, I’m not anywhere as good as Toujou-san…”
Maki truly doesn’t care, and says as much. She watches Kaede disappear into the kitchen in silence, only becoming aware of the heat in her face once she’s alone. What a stupid conversation she just had—and now she’s given in, so Kaede is going to walk away and think that she should actually be interacting with people in that way. It’s absurd.
Pressing down on her chest with a hand, Maki breathes until her heartbeat starts to relax. It takes far longer than she’s expecting, and hasn’t quite returned to normal by the time Kaede returns, carrying a tray with a steaming teapot and two cups. All the progress that Maki manages to make in that area is disrupted anyway when Kaede beams at her, and Maki bites down hard on her lower lip to prevent a huff. This girl is so insanely stressful, she almost can’t see why everyone else her is so enamoured with her.
…No, that’s a lie. Maki can absolutely see why… but you’d be hard-pressed to get her to admit it.