Work Text:
"Above my fortunes, yet my state is well.
I am a gentleman."
– "Cesario" to Olivia, Twelfth Night, Act 1, Scene 5
Olivia stepped out of her advanced math class as the bell rang to announce that school was over for the day. Her brain was absolutely fried after that exam on algebra kicked her in the ass. Even so, her confidence didn’t waver on how well she did on the test. She had studied all week and had gotten 100% on all of the worksheets and homework.
Olivia weaved through the swarm of students as she made her way down the hall. Now that the pressure of the math exam was off of her shoulders, Olivia was going to treat herself to a weekend of relaxation and recuperation with her best friend Maria. Once she finally reached her locker, she put in the combination and swung the metal door open. As she was unloading the week’s academia back into its chambers, a tall guy with sandy brown hair sauntered up to her. “Hey, Liv,” he said as he leaned his elbow up against the locker next to Olivia’s.
Olivia glanced out of the corner of her eye to see who was talking to her; Nathaniel, one of Petruchio’s groupies. They were always harassing Katherina Minola, calling her a difficult harpy. “Oh, hey, Nate,” she mumbled as she exchanged her algebra textbook for her world history textbook. That essay on the Byzantine Empire wasn’t going to write itself.
“Wassup,” he said.
Olivia tossed her math notebook into her locker as her eyes steered clear of making any sort of contact with Nathaniel’s general being. Though he still stood there like an obstacle in her way. “Did you want something, Nate?” she asked.
“What? No, no,” he said. “Well, actually, I did wanna know if you’re down to go to dinner with me Friday night.”
Olivia furrowed her brow as she grabbed her history notebook. “What, to just, like, hang out?” she said.
“Yeah, you know. Like a, date sort of thing.”
“A ‘date-sort-of-thing,’” Olivia repeated as she stuffed her math homework into her locker with a little more force than she intended.
“Yeah. We could just . . . eat and talk. Just the two of us. Nothin’ fancy.”
Olivia rolled her eyes into the back of her head. Unbelievable. For all of the confidence Nathaniel oozed, he sure knew how to make a woman feel special. “You know, Nate, I think I’m gonna pass.”
“Oh, what? Come on, I’ll buy you dinner,” he said.
“You don’t even have the nerve to call it a real date,” Olivia said as she slammed her locker door shut and turned away from him.
“Come on, Liv, don’t be like that. You should be grateful that guys still want you after you got dumped by that college guy.”
Olivia whipped around and glared at Nathaniel. “The only thing I’m grateful for is having standards higher than you could possibly meet. We’re done here, Nate.”
Olivia spun on her heel and started marching away from Nathaniel. What did he take her for, some kind of desperate chump? She may have been dumped by a college guy, but at least she had enough dignity to say no to a guy who put in less effort asking women out than he did spending time admiring his own reflection. He could woo another girl with his half-act.
“You need to get over yourself!” Nathaniel called after her. “No one’s gonna want you if you act like a b—,”
The final bell rang just in time to bring an end to the school day. Olivia took a deep breath as her blood pumped in her eardrums. She trudged her way outside of campus all the way over to one of the empty benches, and threw her stuff down and plopped down next to it with a huff. She put her head in her hands and wiped her face in frustration as she stewed in her disdain for Nathaniel and guys like him. Why did they always ask her out without putting in any effort? They might as well have been asking her what her favorite color was or what the weather was going to be like. Did they believe her to be so desperate that she would throw herself at the first measly guy who half-heartedly poured half his heart out to her?
It wasn’t like she was asking to be courted like it was the 1800s, just maybe a bouquet of flowers or a nice handwritten note about how much they wanted to get to know her as a person. Maybe that was her problem; she was just asking too much from them. She had set her standards too high, and now she was this unattainable conquest all of the guys at Illyria had to face at least once in their high school careers. In retrospect, her standards weren’t even that high; she just wanted to be treated like a person, not some prize to be won. She had her own way of going about the world that nobody, especially the boys, seemed to grasp. Though, there was only one boy who seemed to live up to—go above and beyond, even—Olivia’s standards.
“Hey, stranger,” a soft, masculine voice rang in her ears and broke her out of her brooding. She glanced up, and there was Sebastian Hastings. His hair was mussed up and his uniform was a bit crumpled, and his English textbook sat snug in his armpit.
Olivia shot up so fast that she knocked the wind out of herself. “Sebastian, hi,” Olivia said as she tucked her hair behind her ears and smoothed out her skirt. Great, possibly the only time she didn’t want Sebastian to see her. “Umm, what, what are you doing here?”
“I got a few minutes before soccer practice, so I’m just chillin’,” Sebastian said and shrugged. “Patrollin’ the perimeter.”
“Cool, cool.” The image of Sebastian at soccer practice flashed through Olivia’s mind. All out of breath and exhausted, his jersey stained with dirt and grass, sweat dripping from his brow. Whenever Olivia just “happened” to walk by the soccer field, she made sure to always keep her eye on Sebastian. One time, on a particularly hot day after the coach had made the boys run extra laps, Olivia had caught Sebastian hydrating. He had held the water bottle over his head and squirted it into his mouth, and shook off the excess water that dribbled on his chin like a dog. Olivia had replayed that image in her mind for two days straight.
“Mind if I join you?” he asked.
“Oh, no! No, go right ahead,” she said. She moved her books and binders to under the bench so Sebastian could sit.
“‘Preac’,” he said and flumped down next to her with a soft grunt. He spread his legs apart and his knee brushed up against Olivia’s, and it ignited a fire within her chest. Sebastian put his satchel in his lap and stuffed his English textbook inside. “So, whatcha think Mrs. Franklin’s gonna teach is in science class tomorrow? That elephant toothpaste experiment the other day was pretty off the freakin’ chain, right?”
“Uh huh,” Olivia responded. Her heart chided her brain for only giving Sebastian half of her attention, but that interaction with Nathaniel still ran rampant in her mind. Her body cranked the heat up as her blood simmered over the stove. Her brow pinched together and she gnawed on her bottom lip as her hands gripped her skirt until her knuckles turned white.
“Hey, you okay? You look like something’s bothering you,” Sebastian said.
Olivia cursed Sebastian’s emotional intuition. Normally she’d appreciate it, but now she wished that he was just another clueless, idiot boy. Olivia cleared her throat and shook her head. “It’s nothing, really,” she said.
“Oh yeah? Try me,” Sebastian said and turned his body towards her. He propped his elbow on the bench and rested his temple to his first. His lips curled into that crooked smile that made Olivia’s heart skip one too many beats. “I’m a pretty good listener.”
Olivia blinked a couple of times as her eyelashes fluttered. Her attention had been focused on the way Sebastian had flashed her that boyish grin. She shook her head again. “No, really. It’s, it’s stupid.”
“Hey, I’m very familiar with stupid! Stupid’s my best friend. Stupid and I are like this,” he said and crossed his fingers together.
Olivia had to fight to hold back a snort, though a faint smile was able to slip through the crack of her lips. It was hard not to smile around Sebastian, he was just so endearingly goofy. It was especially difficult when triumph sparkled in his eyes whenever he made her smile or laugh. “Seriously, Sebastian, it’s not a big deal.”
“Seems like a big deal if it’s bothering you this much.”
“Yeah, well, I can handle it.”
Sebastian tucked his tongue into his cheek at Olivia’s insistence. He cleared his throat as he shifted on the bench and draped his arm behind her. “Come on,” he said, “tell Aunt Vi—tell Uncle Sebastian what’s wrong.”
The snort Olivia had pushed down finally escaped and she raised her eyebrow. “‘Uncle Sebastian’?”
“Yeah. I’m your fun uncle who you can confide in about anything to. Your ‘funcle’, if you will.”
Olivia scoffed at Sebastian’s antics, and if it were anyone else pulling this then Olivia would have walked away by now. “Okay, ‘Uncle Sebastian,’ I don’t really feel like talking right now.”
“You know, it never hurts to talk about things. Might make you feel better.”
“I highly doubt it.”
“Come on, tell me.”
“No.”
“Please?”
“No.”
“Pretty please?” Sebastian said and tilted his head and made his eyes all big and sad, like a puppy dog begging for treats.
Olivia’s lip quivered as her resolve crumbled the longer she stared at his cute pout. “Sebastian!” she protested.
“Olivia!” he countered.
Oh, why did he have to care so much that she was feeling bad? Why couldn’t he just brush it off as “womanly woes” and talk about something mindless? Not to mention that kicked puppy dog look of his wasn’t doing Olivia any favors. She groaned and puffed a few strands of hair that had fallen out of place, and she sat back on the bench. Her mind flickered back to that conversation in science class when they were dissecting the frog, how Sebastian said that she was one of the only people he felt comfortable around.
“I got asked out by a guy today,” she admitted.
“Oh,” Sebastian said as his features wilted. “Did . . . Did it not go well?”
Olivia sighed. “He asked me if I wanted to go on a ‘date-sort-of-thing,’” she said and mimed the quotation marks. “I mean, what is that even supposed to mean, anyway?”
“Ouch. That sucks. I’m sorry,” Sebastian said. His tone was empathetic and sincere, not like most people who took pity on her, but it was actually like he understood what she was going through.
“It’s just . . . I mean, I am so sick of guys asking me out,” Olivia said, and scoffed at the words that came out of her mouth. “Sorry, I know that sounds very bitchy and ungrateful.”
“Not really,” Sebastian said. “I mean, I’ve had my fair share of guys—girls, definitely girls ask me out whom I haven’t been interested in.”
Olivia let out a slight laugh. All of the rumors that had spread like wildfire around Illyria painted Sebastian as a regular stud muffin. However, every time Olivia was around him he was so awkward and sincere, almost as if the whole “playboy” act was just that, an act.
“I just . . . I get tired of it,” Olivia said. “It seems like every guy is the same. They just ask me out in this casual, nonchalant way and expect me to say yes to boost their egos, or something. Like, there’s no actual thought put behind it. I’m not even a person to them. I’m just a gloating trophy to parade around.”
Sebastian’s eyes softened as he listened to Olivia’s frustrations, and his heart ached to somehow ease the pain she was going through. “You know, for the record, you deserve to be asked out the way you want,” he said. “You know, giant bouquet of flowers, a heart filled with chocolates, a poem that captures your essence.”
Olivia let out a small laugh. “I mean, at this point I’ll take someone following me around with a guitar while singing love songs.”
“I knew a guy who did that once. The entire lacrosse team gave him a wedgie during fourth period.”
“See? That’s just wrong. I’m sure those dumb jocks were just jealous he was able to express his feelings in such a refined way.”
“Oh, believe me, if you heard the song, you’d agree that a wedgie was letting him off easy.” Second-hand embarrassment coated Sebastian’s face as he recalled the whole Cornwall lacrosse team giving the guy a wedgie right in the middle of the cafeteria.
Olivia chuckled. “Okay, so maybe not a big gesture like that. But seriously, are guys just allergic to putting in effort? I mean, I’m not asking for much, I’m just tired of all the lame offers of going to dinner or a movie. It’s like they don’t even think about what I want.”
“You’d just like to be considered,” Sebastian offered.
“Yes, exactly! God, I feel like I’m crazy!” Olivia said as she took an exasperated breath.
“Tell me about it,” Sebastian mumbled. “You wanna know how my ex—I mean, my sister’s ex-boyfriend asked me—I mean, asked her out?”
“How?”
“He threw a rock at her during soccer practice.”
“Wow. That’s even worse than mine. I’m surprised she said yes.”
“She was going through a difficult time in her life,” Sebastian retorted as he frowned at Olivia.
Olivia grinned at Sebastian’s defense of his sister. They seemed to care a lot about each other. That was one of the things she missed the most about her brother, how much he stuck up for her whenever someone questioned her. Yet just another admirable trait Sebastian Hastings had in the endless list.
“Well, I guess I can’t really blame her. Trying to find a decent guy while weaving through all the bad apples is a tedious task,” Olivia admitted.
“From what I’ve gathered, most of the guys here are either obliviously stupid, insatiable jerks, or understandably average.”
Olivia scoffed. “Yeah, tell me about it.”
Sebastian cleared his throat. “But you know who is a decent guy? Duke Orsino!” he said. “I’m one-hundred percent positive he’d do all that romantic stuff.”
Olivia frowned as Sebastian mentioned Duke Orsino in passing once again. Somehow it seemed that all of their conversations led back to Duke; if Olivia didn’t know any better, she’d believe Sebastian had a big, fat man-crush on the guy. “I guess,” she said, “but he always hangs out with those other jerks from the soccer team. He doesn’t seem like the guy who would buy me flowers or take me dancing.”
“Sure he would! He’d do all those things and more! You just gotta give him a chance!”
“So you’re saying that he’d actually put in effort? He’s not just another nonchalant guy who just sees me as a prize to be won.”
“I promise! Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye!” Sebastian said and pointed to his eye.
Olivia scoffed as she smiled at him. “Okay. If you say so.”
“I know so. Trust ol’ Uncle Sebastian. He’ll never lead you astray.”
“Sure, whatever you say, ‘Uncle Sebastian.’”
Sebastian let out a chuckle, and Olivia pursed her lips as her smile threatened to get wider and wider. However, her heart ached at the idea of Duke putting in all of the effort she wanted in a relationship, because even though it would be everything she asked for, she didn’t really like Duke. She would always be craving those things from someone else. Why did she have to not be Sebastian’s type? What did she have to do to make him consider her in a romantic light? It would be so much easier if he just like her back.
“Hey, don’t let it getcha down,” Sebastian said as his voice became sincere. “One day you’re gonna meet someone who’s crazy about you. You won’t even have to ask for all that romantic stuff ‘cause they’ll know you too well. They’ll have a PhD in the subject of Olivia Lennox.”
Olivia let out a breathy giggle at Sebastian’s clumsy analogy, but her heart skipped a beat at the image of who that person would be. Of course, she pictured the guy with the soft, boyish features, and the dark brown hair, and warm green eyes, who wore a red soccer jersey with the number “13” on it. Olivia furrowed her brow as she tucked her lips into her mouth. “Thanks, Sebastian,” she said as her voice was tender and genuine.
“You know, all those guys are just wasting an opportunity to be with you, ‘cause you’re awesome,” Sebastian said. “If I were them I’d be shooting myself in the foot if I fumbled my chances to go out with you.”
Oh, there was just about nothing that Sebastian could do to ruin his chances of going out with Olivia. While many boys had tried and failed to win Olivia’s affections one way or the other, Sebastian simply had to exist and her heart had claimed him as the object of her affections.
“I mean, you’re a guy, Sebastian,” Olivia said as her eyes scanned him up and down. The tip of her teeth grazed her bottom lip. “What would you do if you were trying to ask me out?”
“If I was trying to ask you out?” Sebastian said and pointed to himself.
“Yeah, just, hypothetically,” Olivia said and shrugged.
Sebastian’s brow creased in contemplation. “Uhh. . . . ‘Hey, lil’ mama, what that mouth do?’” he said.
Olivia’s face scrunched up into an amalgamation of amused bewilderment. The unexpected reply from Sebastian caused her to erupt into a fit of laughter. She smacked him on the thigh and said, “Stop! I’m being serious!”
“That was me being serious!” Sebastian said as his voice raised an octave higher.
“No, it wasn’t!” Olivia said in between giggles.
“Yes, it was!” he insisted.
“No one in their right mind would seriously say that to someone they wanted to go out with.”
“Are you saying you don’t seriously wanna go out with this?” Sebastian put one hand behind his head and one on his hip. He chomped on his bottom lip in an unflattering overbite and flared his nostrils as his eyes bore into Olivia’s soul. Olivia couldn’t contain the smile she had on even if she tried despite the fact that Sebastian was trying to make himself look as unappealing as possible on purpose, his goofy demeanor just tugged her heart closer and closer to him. She scooted closer to him on the bench and their knees brushed together again.
“Come on. What would you do if you were asking me out, for real,” she said.
“For real?” Sebastian said.
Olivia nodded, and Sebastian furrowed his brow in contemplation again. Olivia would have given her left kidney to get a single inkling of what was going on inside of that head of his. “Well, first I’d say, ‘Hi, Olivia, I think you’re very pretty. Can I take you out to dinner?'”
Olivia bit her tongue as an enthusiastic, “Yes!” threatened to escape from her lips. It was just a hypothetical, Sebastian wasn’t really asking her out. Her heart thudded against her ribcage as her mind wandered down the path of what it would be like if it weren’t just a hypothetical.
“I’d get you your favorite kind of flowers, just because they reminded me of you,” Sebastian continued, “I’d hold your hand in the hallway as I’d walk you to class, even if mine was all the way on the other side of campus. I’d write silly little love notes and leave ‘em in your locker for you to find. I’d listen to you talk about your day, and ramblings about anything and everything. I’d climb up onto the roof and shout your name, ‘Olivia’, so that everyone would know I’m yours. I’d tell you every chance I got how much you mean to me and how grateful I am that you’re in my life. How lucky I am that you choose to love me.”
Olivia was floating on Cloud 9 as her entire being basked in the warmth the heavens bestowed upon her. Her ears hung onto every single word of Sebastian’s confession and studied them of their own individual importance. Her eyes sparkled as her heart called out to him and her body ached for him to say more, an entire dissertation if he dared. She was so high above the clouds that it didn’t register to her that Sebastian had stopped talking. His lips weren’t moving to make words anymore, yet the only thing that Olivia wanted Sebastian’s lips to be doing was kissing her.
Her eyelashes fluttered as her senses creeped back over her, no matter how much she rejected them. Her muscles ached and her eye twitched with agitation as her Sebastian-inflicted high eased away. She stared into his eyes as her voice crawled up to her throat and words managed to become a concept to her again. “Wow. . . . You’ve really thought about this a lot, Sebastian,” she said as her breath hitched and she swallowed the glob of spit that was lodged in her throat.
Sebastian let out playful scoff. “What can I say? I’m a real gentleman.”
Olivia let out the faintest breath of a laugh as her eyes were glued to Sebastian. His eyes, his hair, his smile. . . . Olivia wanted it all committed to memory so even on her deathbed she could still picture his face.
“Welp. I better get goin’,” Sebastian said. He hopped up off the bench and adjusted his tie. “Dinklage does not take kindly to tardiness, and them balls won’t kick ‘emselves.”
Both Olivia’s heart and brain screamed for Sebastian to stay, but she was frozen in place after he had just dropped the most heartfelt love confession she had heard from someone.
“Catch ya later, Olivia,” he said and threw out a peace sign.
Olivia snapped out of her stupor was she watched as Sebastian fumbled off to the soccer field.
“Yeah. . . . Bye. . . . Sebastian.”
The words Sebastian said still echoed in her mind; it was like nothing she had ever heard before. Even that college guy she had dated had never said anything so romantic and heartfelt. Sebastian just had a way with words, he was so eloquent even when speaking to her as a friend. Maybe that was part of the appeal, that there was no ulterior motive with him, his friendship was true. He never asked anything of her but her presence. Why was it tat the only guy who hadn’t hit on her, that’s who Olivia fell for? Suppose it was delicious irony. She definitely needed that girls’ weekend with Maria now.