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The music was too loud, the lights were too bright, and the lights were strobing at mismatch intervals. He didn’t even want to come. Yeah, he’s having fun, yeah he won the game against Ottawa. But why do they have to stay here? Why do they need to celebrate every single win? Why were the centaurs out as well. They seemed less upset than almost every other team in the league. He wants to leave. He texted Ilya twenty minutes ago mid beer, but he’s yet to hear from him. How hard was it to look at your phone? Someone approaches him at the bar.
“One please.” JJ says before looking over at him, “I lied. Two please.”
“Same thing?” The bartender asks JJ.
“Yeah same thing as last time!” JJ throws his arms around Shane and suddenly Shane is very aware he’s been sipping on a beer for an hour. He’s handed some fruity monstrosity he doesn’t want to imagine the amount of calories are dumped in this thing.
“Looks great man!” Shane says, stepping away from the bar with said fruit drink.
“Try it! You’ll like it!” Shane doesn’t to try it, but he does anyway. And it’s good.
“Holy shit.” He mutters.
“Crazy right! Just tell Jackson you need a JJ special!” JJ is back in the crowd before he knows it. He drinks the drink too fast, clearly trying to seem calm when he is anything but. The next song comes on and the strobing lights are officially too much. He looks around for Ilya, he’s here somewhere.
“Boo!” Ilya grabs him from behind and he screams, clearly startled.
“People could have seen! What is wrong with you!” Shane squawks back at him. He wanted to see him from across the room not feel like he’s being jumped by the guy.
“Relax. No one even looked our way. I wanted to ask if you are okay?”
“I’m fine Rozanov. Don’t scare me like that again.” He huffs and attempts to walk away. A hand stops him from going to far.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, oh my god. I’m getting another drink. See you at two.” He leaves, not turning around to see Ilya’s face because he knows he’d lose it. He’d cry and break down because everything is so loud and it feels like it’s getting bigger. Hey orders another cocktail and sits on at the bar.
“Hey I’m ready to go.” Is whispered in his ear. Well Shane was ready to go an hour ago. He doesn’t want to talk to anyone, well maybe the bartender. One more JJ special and he’s in the clouds. Now he wants Ilya. Now he’d be fine getting jumped by him.
“Well I’m not. I’m fine.” He crosses his arms.
He loops around the bar twice looking for him and he doesn’t see his eyes. He’s a hard man to miss just by his physical stature. He wipes his eyes a couple times before deciding to get an uber. Ilya must have left him behind. Shane sits on the curb and waits and waits and waits some more it feels like but it’s here.
“Hello, are you Shane Hollander?” She asks him.
“That’s me.” He crawls in the back seat. Maybe he shouldn’t text him he’s on his way, a text from him is the easiest thing to expect. But still the phone screen stares empty. Why hasn’t Ilya called him yet? He left the bar? Yeah he told the guy to buzz off, but now he wanted him. He wanted him before too, he just had to prove a point.
“Here.” The kind woman says and he nods, giving her a fifteen dollar ship and stumbling towards the front door. Thank for electronic locks because could have never gotten on the house with his set of keys.
“Ilya!” He calls out while he toes his shoes off and rushes to the kitchen. He should have a snack. No he should get paci first. Maybe he should lay down first.
He goes with the third option, on the floor.
“Ilya!” When there’s no movement a second time he knows he’s not here yet.
“Ilya! Rozanov! Please! I’m sorry.” He cries and realizes the man really isn’t there. He fishes his phone out of his pocket and is clicking lily’s profile immediately.
“Where are you?” It’s gritted in this teeth.
“Home.”
“I’ve been looking for your for twenty minutes freaking out, Hollander! Am going to car now. How did you drive? You were drunk?”
“Wasn’t drunk. Didn’t drive. Hey weird question, where do we keep the, you know.” He blushes at the thought of the word.
“‘I’ll be home in ten. Drink water please.”
“Okay.” The line goes dead and he adjusts to get a glass from the sink. He chugs it and just sits back down. He likes sitting on the floor, he knows Hayden called it his version of tummy time or floor time, he likes it. You could see everyone and everything. He’s liked it since he was a kid.
“Shane?” Is called out by the door and his whole face lights up.
“Ilya!” Shane giggles from his spot on the floor.
“Okay, you are safe and okay.” He kneels down the kiss him.
“Why didn’t you wanna leave?” Ilya looks around as if he’s on candid camera
“I asked to go when I asked if you were okay. You were swaying like you do when baby.”
“No I wasn’t.” He uses his sleeve to scrub tears off his eyes.
“Come on love. Let’s get ready for bed.” He holds his hands out and after a huff Shane takes them to be helped up. He stumbles into Ilya while giggling.
“Hello.” He slurs.
“Oh you are not going to like yourself tomorrow, come here, let me carry you.” He picks him up and Shane instinctively wraps his legs around the other man.
“Missed you.” He thinks he might cry again. When he sets him on the floor row shocking. He wasn’t ready for that.
“I missed you too. Let me get you pajamas. Go potty.”
“I don’t have to go potty.”
“Then try!”
“Don’t have too!” He shouts at Ilya and he walks back in, looking fed up.
“Let’s just get ready for bed.” He gets closer to Shane and hears his giggle before he adds on “how little are we feeling tonight?”
“Not little. Need paci to be little.” Shane points out.
“Okay, well, are we going to have a wet bed tonight if we don’t wear protection?” A shrug, he responded with a shrug.
“I don’t know. Maybe?” Ilya sighs, carrying him back to bed.
“Wait here.” He instructs him, but Shane is too busy finding his things. He’s fucking rhythmically and rubbing blankie the same way.
“I’m Still in outside clothes!” Shane reminds Ilya, he knows how much Shane dislikes that.
“Coming. Comimg. Here big tee shirt.” He has more than the big tee shirt, but Shane strips the top half of his clothes away.
“Smells like you.” Shane mumbled as he put it on.
“Me or you?” He asks and Shane looks at the supplies.
“You.” He’s holding the loon over his head now and dropping it every couple seconds to catch it. Ilya has gotten faster at diaper changing or even diaper placing in the last few months. Once he’s settled and Ilya pats him to move he curls up. He shouldn’t have drank tonight. He shouldn’t have been a fish at the restaurant. Mister I want to leave I want to stay.
“Can we tell stories?” Shane asks after the lights are flicked off.
“Sure, of course we can….”
The next morning when Shane stretches he’s unhappy to see Ilya has vacated the bed. He’s not a huge fan of that. He rubs his eyes some more and sees a pair of socks labeled with his name in them so he puts them on before walking about the house.
“Ilya!” Is shouted behind his pacifier, his blankie hangs around his shoulders.
“Ilya! Found you!” He rushes over and crawls on his lap, a gentle kiss hits his temple.
“Didn’t want to wake you.” He says.
“Missed you this morning.”
“Yeah? How’s your tummy?”
“Weird.”
“Yeah, you had a lot of alcohol and not a lot of food. How’s your diaper fairing?” He reaches one hand down from his laptop and makes a noise, “see we did the right thing last night.” Shane nods in agreement. He was lucky Ilya had thought of that.