Chapter Text
Qifrey awoke to a shooting, electrical throbbing in his head. It was the kind of headache that had taken root in his eye socket, radiated down into his jaw and made his damaged shoulder ache. It was the kind of headache he has had for two weeks straight, the kind that no amount of tea, chewed herbs or alcohol could take the edge off. He wouldn’t have called what he did last night “sleeping”, more so that his body finally shut off from the shaking exhaustion of constant pain. Qifrey awoke, knowing that he had hit his limit and that this was the day.
A pity, he thought, with almost no feeling but cold, feather light relief. I had almost made it.
“Well… just one more breakfast, Qifrey,” He told himself as he went through the motions of his morning routine. Glasses on, collar laced, leg straps tied, skirt on, belt. He put a tranquileaf in his mouth, even if chewing aggravated the headache without doing much for the pain. “Then a lunch and dinner. A midnight snack with Olly if he’ll have us. We simply must to do a good job on these next few meals.”
He was almost grateful he could no longer see his haggard visage in any detail when he looked into his mirror. His remaining eye had slowly developed something of a shining, silver, moon-like cataract over the surface of his cornea that burned in a searing pain when he was in the sun. When it became visible enough to worry his apprentices, he told them that he was to be scheduled for a very simple and very routine surgery in the near (but vaguely defined) future to correct it and that he would be just fine once it’s over. He told the same lie to Olruggio, his heart breaking when he saw how happy Olruggio was when he thought that Qifrey was finally taking care of his health.
He always hated himself for having to lying to them.
He prepared the batter that would become pancakes, then let the batter sit. Letting the batter sit let the flour evenly absorb all of the liquids for the best consistency and gave him a few minutes to chop up fruits or prepare berries. He used some of the time to think about Coco.
She left the day after they returned to the atelier from the last Silver Eve any of them ever wanted to attend. Despite his and Olruggio's best efforts, she never came back home. They all tried so hard to bring her back but she was fast and remained just out of their grasps.
Maybe he should be grateful. Fearing and worrying about Coco’s fate kept him alive long enough to almost see his other three apprentices graduate. Even now, thinking about his lost apprentice either cold, hungry, dead or in the hands of the Brimhats was enough to make the silverwood inside him furl up when nothing else could. He hoped he had taught her enough to keep her alive but had his doubts. At least he held some hope that she could have learned whatever she needed to thrive out in the unknown.
Coco would have known he was full of shit. She probably already knows, now that he thought of it.
He smiled as he served up breakfast to his beloved remaining apprentices. They were all grown women now, just short of going out into the world as witches, but they got fed three meals a day regardless of their age or abilities while they were still his. His smile felt real today, fueled by the idea of the bright future each of his girls were going to have.
After they cleaned up, he sent the girls away to study for the final test. He had lectured them right up to the last page of The Primer two days ago and had nothing left to teach them.
It was an odd feeling, knowing there was nothing left for him to give them.
When they had all gone, he sat down at the table at the seat they used set every night for Coco, just in case she decided to come home. He held his head in his hands, trying to bring up whatever horrible thing he could to make the pain in his head ebb just enough for him to do the dishes.
A warm, steady hand appeared on his shoulder along with a familiar twisting feeling around his intestines.
“You alright?” Olruggio asked him, with that typical gentle gruffness of his.
“Oh, yes. I’m sorry,” He said, taking his head out of his hands to look at this best friend. His sunlight. His partner in pain. He couldn’t see his sweet face clearly anymore but he didn’t need to. Olruggio’s face was burned into his memory like sunlight on a clear day. Every detail, every eyelash, every way he smiled, all the times he looked at Qifrey when he thought he wasn’t looking… Qifrey held onto all of them, even if they hurt. “I’m surprised to see you get up this early. I’m afraid you missed breakfast.”
“Bold of you to assume I slept,” He chuckled as he started a pot of tea. Judging by the smell of the opened tin, it was something floral and relaxing. Probably more tranquileaf, if he had to guess. “I'm going to bed after this cup of tea.”
“There should be some fruit left,” Qifrey gestured to the counter where he had left the last of the fruit. He hated to waste food but he couldn't see much if a point in stretching those last few pieces into another meal. “Have some, please.”
“Yeah yeah,” Olruggio waved him off, though he did what Qifrey requested.
With a stabbing ache in his heart, Qifrey wondered who will nag him to rest and eat balanced meals when he's gone. He wasn’t sure what Olruggio would do in their empty home. Maybe he would move back to the Great Hall and be the star of the witches’ capital city.
“Olly?” Qifrey asked, trying to sound as normal as he could. “Would you mind spending some time with me tonight?”
Olruggio paused for a moment at the question.
“Sure, yeah. I don't mind at all,” He answered, a suspicious apprehension in his voice. “You sure you're okay?”
“I'm… just dealing with not being a teacher anymore,” He answered, not quite lying but not quite telling the truth. “I'm sure you understand.”
“Aw, don't be like that,” Olruggio said with a shake of his head. He poured two cups of tea, putting the first one in front of Qifrey. “They’re grown up but those kids are always gonna call you Master Qifrey, ya know.”
Qifrey watched the blurry shape of the steam rise from the cup.
“Maybe you can take on a few more troublemakers,” Olruggio suggested, blowing on his tea. “The house might feel empty otherwise.”
“I never thought I'd see the day you would suggest that I take on more apprentices,” Qifrey said with a little laugh. He wrapped his hands around the cup and felt the warmth of it soak into his perpetually cold fingers. “Would you have wanted me to do that?”
“Sure,” Qifrey could hear the smile in his words. “I gotta say, I think the Watchful Eye thing grew on me.”
“Oh, isn't that the understatement of the century,” Qifrey teased, wishing he was holding Olruggio’s hands instead of just another damned cup of tea. All he wanted right now was his warmth, his reassurance, to be with him through the horrible thing he was planning to do. “You know you wear that title so well.”
“Whatever,” He scoffed, though Qifrey could tell he was flattered by the complement.
“Olly?”
“Hm?”
“Thank you for doing this with me,” Qifrey said softly, unable to look directly at his kind, radiant Olruggio. “I… well, I really couldn't have done any of this without you.”
“What's up with you? You're talkin’ like you're dyin’,” He said with a good natured scoff, throwing back the last of the tea like a shot. “You don't have to thank me, Qifrey. I'm happy to do it. You know that.”
“I know.” He did know. He really, truly knew. “I just wanted to say it.”
“I guess I appreciate hearing it,” He admitted, throwing a couple of berries into his mouth. Those berries were probably the last of the season, so Qifrey hoped he enjoyed them. “I’m not busy right now. You need me to do anything while I'm out here?”
“Perhaps…” Qifrey said, hesitantly. Normally, he would shoo him away. He’d tell him he’s perfectly capable of taking care of everything and to go to bed, Olruggio. It wasn’t a normal day, though. He looked to the sink and winced at the idea of glass clinking against his headache. “Perhaps you wouldn't mind doing the dishes for me?”
“Yeah, I can do that,” He smiled, surely happy that Qifrey finally asked him for help. “What are you doin’ with the rest of your day if you’re not teaching? Am I gonna catch you chewin’ on the furniture?”
“Ah, no, don’t worry about me being idle. I still have some things I need to attend to,” Qifrey said, watching Olruggio tie up his sleeves. He always moved so confidently, lending a unique gracefulness to his actions. “I’m fairly good at staying busy.”
“Don’t I know it,” He chuckled as he began on the dishes. “I’ve been thinkin’... Maybe we can do some traveling after the kids take the test, just something for the two of us. There’s some restaurants down south I think you’ll like.”
“Olly, are you trying to take me on vacation?” Qifrey laughed at the absurdity of it all, despite the stabbing pain in his eye socket. When have either of them taken a vacation? Do witches truly ever take vacations?
“Yeah, I guess if you wanna call it that,” Qifrey didn’t need to see his face to know he was blushing. “I thought it’d be nice to celebrate.”
Qifrey was quiet for a moment, using a sip of tea as an excuse to not speak. Could he hold out with all this pain and his failing vision long enough to go on that vacation and try all of Olruggio’s hand picked southern restaurants? He wanted to. He felt roots move in the darkness of his lungs.
“It would be nice, wouldn’t it?”
While the girls studied, he put the final touches on their goodbye presents. After realizing that he had never written down his recipes, he spent several months slowly collecting their favorites into one tome. He surreptitiously sent the precious collection off to be replicated and bound by a book binder he trusted. The five recipe books came back to him last week in a satisfyingly heavy box. They were beautifully bound and, in his opinion, something to be proud of leaving behind.
It really was not a bad legacy to leave behind, all things considered. He liked knowing that the girls could always come back together to share one of his meals. Or, even better, a meal of his they made their own.
He rewrote the letters once more, making them as perfect as one could make a suicide note to one’s children, partner, master and friend. He burned the previous versions, unwilling to let any of them see the rougher drafts. Letters to Beldaruit and Alaria were sent on a delay. The books and letters to his apprentices and Olruggio were to be left on the table for them instead of breakfast.
Qifrey didn’t know if Coco would ever get her gift and letter but he couldn’t die with himself if he didn’t include her. Maybe they would find their way back to her. Maybe not. He wouldn’t ever know.
At lunch, he insisted the apprentices take a break from studying and come to the table for lunch. He told them and himself that studying without adequate nutrition won’t help them retain what they’ve studied. Really, he knew he just wanted to see most of his apprentices all in one place as many times as he could before they left him and he left them.
“I feel like Agott,” Richeh muttered, rubbing her eyes with the heels of her hands. “Richeh does NOT study like this.”
She had gradually stopped speaking in second person as she grew, mostly doing it now for dramatic effect.
“Maaaaybe that’s not a bad thing,” Tetia said before shoving a grilled cheese sandwich into her mouth. “Tetia also doesn’t study like this.”
“Vindication feels so good,” Agott said flatly through a smirk. “I can do this all day.”
“But please remember that you shouldn’t,” Qifrey piped up, more or less pretending to eat the tomato soup in front of him. “Rest is just as important as studying.”
Says the hypocritical witch.
The apprentices left the kitchen spotless for him after lunch, bidding him farewell when they returned to their studies.
He found that there was nothing left for him to do but prepare for dinner and his last evening with Olruggio.
It was selfish of him to make his favorite foods for dinner, a plethora of spicy, savory dishes. He tried to tell himself it was fine, since he had cooked everyone’s favorite meal at least once in the last week but the guilt gnawed at him regardless.
“Ooo, it’s Master Qifrey dinner night,” Tetia said as she took a big serving of Four Spice Soup. “You did everyone else’s favorite dinner so I was wondering when you would do your favorite dinner.”
“You noticed?” Qifrey asked, a little embarrassed that he was caught. “And here I thought I was being discreet.”
“We notice everything,” Richeh said, ominously, as she dulled the spice in her soup with a big dollop of sour cream and a handful of shredded cheese.
“It’s true, we do,” Agott said, making steely, pointed eye contact with him. Such a hard expression for someone so young, though he hasn’t truly seen Agott’s expression soften since the night at Silver Eve he saw her doodling and laughing with Coco.
“Did you make the appointment for your eye yet, Master Qifrey?” Tetia asked him. Between her and Olruggio dogging him, he wished he really could make that appointment.
“No, not yet,” He answered, putting a spoon full of the soup into his mouth. He silently cursed the full moon in his eye for trying to give up his secrets. “My apologies, I’ve been busy.”
“Masterrrr.”
“I know, I know,” He shook his head. “Don’t worry about your old master, I will take care of it.”
“You better,” Richeh said, threateningly. “Or you’ll get so many AngRicheh points.”
“We wouldn’t want that,” He wonders how many AngRicheh points he will gain tonight. “Don’t worry about me, right now. You have a test to worry about.”
“Fried flying shrimp? Hell of a breakfast,” Olruggio joked, still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes when he made it to the table.
“I also made dessert,” Qifrey smiled through the pounding in his head. “Which I’m sure you smelled. Alcohol as well, unless it’s too early for you. How did you sleep?”
“Like a rock,” He answered with a yawn and a stretch that brought forth a series of harmless cracks. “I think I’m getting too old for all nighters.”
“You said it, not I,” Qifrey said fondly. Maybe they didn’t get as old together as Olruggio had pictured but… He liked to think he made it pretty far, considering what he was. “Do you plan to take on less work once the girls have graduated?”
“I’ll try,” He shrugged, taking a seat at the table. “I have a feelin’ that might be more effort chasin’ people away than it would be just acceptin’ the work.”
“Do people not listen to fireballs launched at them?”
Olruggio laughed around a mouth full of flying shrimp.
“You’d be surprised,” He said with a shake of his head. “Some of em are pretty persistent.”
“Well, no, I know how popular you are,” Qifrey said, wishing he could reach out and touch him. It was almost impossible to hold back the silverwood these days, the roots wrapping tighter around his organs at every brush of Olruggio’s hand. Sometimes he felt it squeeze when he was simply in the same room as his oldest, dearest friend. If he could feel anything but pain and the impending relief of ending it, he would feel angry that he couldn’t stroke his hair and tell him he’s sorry for what he needs to do.
Olruggio looked at him, his eyes narrowed.
“Qifrey, are you sick?” He asked, wiping his hand on a napkin before putting the back of his hand on Qifrey’s forehead. Presumably, he was checking for a fever. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sick sick but you look like hell right now.”
That’s definitely what he felt like. He didn’t doubt that’s what he looked like as well.
“I don’t think so, no,” He sat still, patiently allowing Olruggio to fuss over him. It was nice to feel cared for, even if it made the silverwood wriggle like worms under his skin and in the marrow of his bones. He supposed it didn’t matter now if the tree grew in a little more. “Do I have a fever?”
“No…” Olruggio took his hand off his forehead and put his palm on his cheek. “Are you just not sleeping well?”
“I am… admittedly, not sleeping as well as I would like,” He answered, so relieved to finally have a single truth to tell him. He touched the back of Olruggio’s hand gingerly with the tips of his fingers, brushing over the all the burn scars on his knuckles. He wondered if he will miss his bright, gentle Olruggio when the silverwood finally ends his tenure as a witch. “I’m hoping I can rest easier tonight.”
“I hope so, too,” Olruggio smiled and patted his face gently. “I’m the only one who gets to have bags under his eyes here.”
After the meal was over, the desserts were polished off and the wine was finished. Qifrey found had nothing left to offer Olruggio in order to steal just a few more precious minutes with the love of his life.
“You should get to bed,” Olruggio told him, cleaning up the remains of their evening. “I’ll take care of everything here. You get some rest.”
“That’s what I’m supposed to say,” Qifrey said, hoping it wasn’t obvious that he was holding back tears.
“Weird feelin’, aint it?” Olruggio dumped everything in the sink, then came back to shoo him to his bedroom. For a moment, Qifrey considered listening to him. “Go on. Get some sleep, professor.”
Qifrey wrapped his arms around Olruggio and pulled him into a hug. It felt nice to rest his head on his shoulder, despite the roots stabbing into his bones. It felt nice to feel Olruggio rub his back and tell him that everything is okay, even when he felt leaves in his throat and tasted ink and bile. It was just so nice to be with Olruggio, even if it was killing him as much as it had kept him alive.
“Thank you, Olly,” He said, pulling away when he almost couldn’t chase back the tree with all of the despair he held in a reserve in his heart. “Maybe I will rest tonight.”
It was late when Olruggio finally sent him to bed, and most of the lights in the apprentices’ rooms were off.
He silently opened the door to Tetia and Richeh’s room, a slow, practiced motion he always used when he snuck into check on the girls. He stopped doing it for the most part as they got older in respect for their privacy but… well, he wanted to see them safe one last time.
He found that they were both out cold, exhausted from the day of studying.
He went to Tetia first, his bold, mysterious apprentice. He had asked all of his students individually what they planned to do once they graduated. Tetia told him that she had held on to her dream of traveling and learning how to say “thank you” in every language. She still wanted to make everyone comfortable and happy. Throughout the years, Qifrey had chosen to ignore the stolen books on medicine he sometimes found hidden in the atelier. He prayed she never ever got caught in her quest to bring comfort to everyone she meets.
He stroked her hair, picked up one of her fallen plushies and thanked her softly before going to Richeh.
Richeh had always been a craftsman but at some point, her contraptions began to seriously impress everyone, including Olruggio. He had said once that he admired how pointedly she used light, the opposite of the ambient way he used light and heat.
She had spent a lot of time since that Silver Eve perfecting the split-shard rings and bangles. They now could locate each other over at least a hundred miles and had built a rather large savings from their sales but she never seemed entirely satisfied with them. She never talked about why. Qifrey wondered how far she could get them to connect once she had a full workshop of her own to tinker in.
He brushed her bangs down with his fingers and told her goodbye.
The light was still on in Agott’s room, which was no surprise to him. He tapped on her door, wondering how he was going to say goodbye to an apprentice who was still awake.
“I- I’m finishing up now,” She said, voice muffled by the door. “I’m going to bed soon.”
“I’m not really worried about that, Agott,” He said, gently. He couldn’t stop Agott if he tried. And he has tried. “May I come in?”
There was a pause. Then footsteps towards the door.
“Sure?” She said, opening the door and letting him in. “What’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing. I’m just visiting for a moment,” He smiled, gaze wandering to her overflowing desk. “What has you studying so late into the night?”
“Everything,” She said with a sigh. “I’m going to get full marks on this test.”
“You’ve been working so hard that I don’t doubt it,” He praised. “Agott, what are your plans once you pass the test? If you don’t mind indulging your old master.”
She looked at her desk, all the open books and scrawled notes.
“They’re not going to pick me to be the next librarian, are they.” She said, not asked, shoulders slumping.
“Do you really still want that?” Qifrey asked, not from a place of judgment but of curiosity. Qifrey knows rejection when he sees it and he sees it so clearly in Agott’s family.
“I… I don’t know,” She admitted. “I think so.”
“What will you do in the meantime?”
He saw her hesitate, nervously shifting her weight from one foot to another. Then she took a deep breath and stood firmly.
“I'm going to find Coco,” She answered confidently. “I need to know where she went.”
“That… that certainly explains the maps, doesn't it?” Qifrey said, trying to focus on the unfurled map on her desk. It was weighed down with ink vials and one of Richeh's crystals.
“You're not going to stop me?” She blinked, clearly expecting more of a fight. Maybe she would have gotten one if the circumstances were different.
“No, not at all. You're going to be an adult. I can't and won't stop you if that is the path you choose to take. I only hope I gave you the tools you need to take it,” He felt his smile falter. “My only request is that when you find her, please tell her I'm sorry.”
Agott stared at him, but the cold steel in her expression was absent.
“I will,” She agreed, determination set in her voice. “But… are you okay, master?”
“I wonder why everyone keeps asking me that,” He shook his head. “Yes, I'm fine. Perhaps a little tired.”
Agott clearly did not believe him, waiting in silence until he spoke.
Qifrey sighed, knowing he could never explain himself fully to her. Definitely not in the little time he had left to borrow from her.
“It's… difficult knowing that I won't be your master anymore.”
Agott threw herself into his arms hard enough to almost knock the wind out of him.
“Oof- I appreciate your enthusiasm,” He held her against his chest and stroked her hair. “Oh, my dear first apprentice… you make me so proud. You’re going to be a fantastic witch, I just know it.”
She didn't respond for a moment, only hugged him tighter. He let her.
“Master?”
“Yes?”
“I'm going to bring her home,” She said firmly. “You can apologize to Coco yourself.”
“I would love to,” He tried not to choke on that answer. “Agott?”
“Yeah?”
“You should take the fifth test some day. I think you'd be a good teacher.”
“Wait, what?” She said, surprised by the comment. “You… actually think so?”
“Why not?” He insisted. “You wouldn't know it, but I was a lot like you growing up. You should consider it, at least.”
“… Okay, I'll consider it,” She slowly releases her grip on him. “No promises though.”
“I expect nothing less.” He smiled, getting one last look at his apprentice. “Go to bed, Agott. You'll have time to study tomorrow.”
Before he left his atelier for the last time, Qifrey put on his cloak and his hat. He lived as a witch and he was certainly going to die as one. He closed the door silently behind him and walked to the overhanging ledge some ways behind the atelier.
It was open there, endless starry sky in front of him, his beloved home behind him, the full bright moon above him. He took a deep breath of the clean night air and wished he wasn’t doing this on such a lovely night.
He held Olruggio’s ribbon tangled in his fingers, a token of the promise he was about to break. He had half a mind to take off the ribbon and throw it over the ledge but his body refused to carry out the action. Instead, he turned to face the atelier.
He took one last lungful of the night air.
Then… he gave up.
He stopped thinking of all the little anxieties that made his heart race and kept him alive. He stopped thinking of all the chores and grocery lists and teaching lessons that kept him moving. He stayed still. He thought of the beautiful night sky and the fireflies in the fields. He thought of the full body hug Agott had given him and how proud he was of the things she taught him as a master. He thought of the way Tetia and Richeh cared about his health and how wonderfully these young women will change the world. He rubbed the ribbon between his fingers and remembered how nice it felt to be in Olruggio’s arms.
The silverwood was released from its seed in a dizzying, thunderous burst from his body. It was eager to finally take root after decades of waiting and many aborted sproutings. Branches sprung from his empty eye socket, knocking his glasses clean off his face.
He wished he wasn’t alone. He was so tired of facing all the pain alone.
Roots shot through his spine and into his nerves. They wrapped fully around his organs, sharp jabs of organic matter forced its way into his liver, his lungs, his stomach… He tried not to scream around the horrible taste of ink in his mouth. He had no idea if he was successful.
He knew at some point in the process it stops hurting. He had to hold out until then, though he really didn’t have much of a choice in the matter.
“Qifrey?”
“Olly,” He smiled, the relief and the joy of seeing his best friend, his brightest star, the love of his life, his sunlight, washed over him. “My Olly. I missed you so much. I knew you wouldn’t let me do this alone.”
“Horrified” was something of an understatement of the expression on Olruggio’s face.
“Shit, Qifrey, I-” The blood had drained from his face as he tried to process what he was seeing. “This… Why do I know what this is? This has happened before, hasn’t it?”
“It has, yes,” He said softly, reaching his hand and his branches toward Olruggio. “So many times. This is the last time, Olly. Let it be the last time.”
“How do I stop it, Qifrey? Tell me how to stop it.” He looked around desperately, as if the answer was in the grass somewhere. “Qifrey, don’t you fucking leave me like this.”
Then he spotted Qifrey’s hat beside his roots.
“Please don’t,” Qifrey begged. “Please don’t save me, Olruggio.”
“What the fuck is wrong with you? Why shouldn’t I save you?” Olruggio picked up the hat, pulling down the flap that hid that horrible, horrible seal. He was glad he never had to cry bitter tears to make that damned ink. “Let me help you, Qifrey.”
“This is helping me. Letting me die is helping me,” He said in almost a whisper. “I’m always in pain, Olly. Everything hurts all of the time. I can’t see. I can’t sleep. I can barely eat. There’s nothing left of me but silverwood. If you love me as much as I love you, you would let me go. Please let me go.”
“There has to be something-”
“There isn’t,” He said sadly, salty, inky tears dripping down his face. “We’ve tried, old friend. Hours of research. There’s nothing. Please don’t stop this.”
“You… you weren’t supposed to leave me. You were never supposed to leave me,” Olruggio said, brushing away angry tears with his sleeve. “What the hell do I do now, Qifrey?”
“Stay with me for a little while. This process is… unfortunately not as instantaneous as I would like it to be,” He answered, strained from the roots wrapping around his esophagus. “Please just stay with me. I just want to see you.”
“What do I tell the girls?”
“Nothing. Letters are on the table.”
“Well, fuck me,” Olruggio laughed in disbelief. “You really do think of everything.”
“I try,” He couldn’t help but laugh a little, too. “Olly?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m so very sorry you’re seeing this.” The silverwood choked him tighter, squeezing on his heart. “I’m sorry. I love you.”
Olruggio dropped the hat and climbed through the branches up to Qifrey’s face. Just like he did the first time.
“I’m the one who’s sorry, Qifrey. I wish I had known how bad it was. I wish I could have known.” He caressed his cheek, gently tracing his cheekbone with the pad of his thumb. It felt so nice to be in his arms. “I love you, too. Ever since I first saw you. I’ve loved you this whole time. I’m so fucking mad at you for leaving me.”
“Can’t say I blame you.” Qifrey said, so full of love and happiness that the last thing he will see is Olruggio’s kind, beautiful, tear-streaked face. He got to look into the sun one last time. What more could a witch ask for? “I wish I didn’t have to.”
Olruggio thought for a moment.
Qifrey enjoyed the warmth of his hands.
“Will you let me help you one last time?” He asked, voice shaking with a sob. "Please, Qifrey?”
“Okay,” Qifrey agreed, feeling the roots pierce through his lungs. “Okay, Olly.”
“Rest easy, Qifrey. I love you so much,” Olruggio said before kissing him.
Qifrey felt his lips on his mouth and Olruggio’s tears on his face. He felt a root pierce straight and true through his heart. He felt nothing after that.
The Star of Ghodrey climbed down from the silverwood that was once a witch named Qifrey. He collapsed to his knees at the base of the big, terrible tree and sobbed until his eyes burned, his head pounded and the dawn rose. He hated the way the light reflected off the silver leaves with that awful malice.
“Qifrey,” He said, his voice hoarse with sobbing. He wondered if the girls heard him or if they had found the stupid fucking letters that Qifrey had left behind. He wondered if Qifrey left him one, too, though he wasn't sure if he wanted to read it. “I don’t know if you can hear me but if you can…”
He stood up on his shaking, grass and blood stained legs. He dusted off the hat and collected his glasses, resting them at the base of the tree.
“I’m going to take our girls to their test. I’m going to watch them graduate in your place and send them off into the world like their master should have done.”
He wiped his face again with his sleeve, ignoring the burn of his face rubbed raw from the fabric.
“When they’re gone, I’m going to join you,” He said, definitive and not open to an argument. “Wait for me. I’ll be with you soon.”
(Art by lizardsarecute linked in comments. Thank you!!)