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I was finally getting some sleep. I was.
Five seconds of the infinite bliss of being in Morpheus's arms was all I got before a certain someone dragged me out of it.
I am Joe’s wet erection.
My eyes opened slowly, the world moved at a movie-like slow motion and my chest was already going up and down, and my heart was already speeding up, trying to get blood supply to where it was really necessary right now.
Why am I like this all of a sudden? What the fuck was I dreaming of?
Air blowing over my wet, previously warm, shaft.
I jolt at the discomfort. I lift my body slightly to get a better view of whatever was going on there. Tyler Durden is what’s going on.
“Morning.” Tyler said.
I was too drowsy to react to him at all. I was not sure of what I should feel like, aside from the natural pleasure this kind of interactions naturally provide. Was I even drowsy? Was I even asleep before Tyler got my dick stuck in his mouth?
What are you even doing? I asked.
He smiled and got back to it, I could feel his warm throat, that characteristic chipped teeth brushing the delicate skin occasionally and his saliva slowly going down all the way through my sack.
I was baffled, lost in my own confusion, I can't even bring myself to feel my swollen, fresh wounds from last night's fight club. I just lay my head down again. Let go.
Tyler puts his hands around my thighs as he sucks harder and faster, then one of them on the base of my penis.
I can't help but whine, moan and squirm around here and there. I’m ecstatic, unable to pull away, but unable to look at him. My hands automatically go to his hair and play with it, never controlling the pace, just letting him know I’m feeling everything he's doing.
Squeeze.
Let go.
Tremble.
Repeat.
He deepthroats. I moan loudly and pull his hair upwards, my other hand travels fast to the hand that just stopped moving up and down on my dick. I can feel the burnt scar in the back of his hand. Tyler's kiss. My kiss.
Prepare to abandon soul in three, two, one.
I can feel dopamine, oxytocin and other whatever hormones being distributed all over my body. I think this is the first time I've ever ejaculated in someone's mouth, my sperms may be asking each other “Where’s the ovum, man?” as they are mercilessly swallowed by Tyler and dragged into his stomach acid.
He suddenly climbs on top of me, the sight of his perfectly sculpted tits and his waist and his erect cock was enough to make me hard again. Don't even get me started on his coffee cup themed robe hanging from his folded arm as he reaches back to stuff himself.
I panic and reach for his arm. Wait a sec, I say. Tyler seems visibly confused. My breath is fast again and my mind is clogged between the pleasant thought of having my first time with Tyler and the shame of this being my first time, in my thirties.
No way, Tyler says, you've never fucked anybody?
I’m Jack’s warm, gut wrenching shame. No.
Tyler laughs.
Relax, he says, you have the easy part, laying down and feeling good.
No, I say, Tyler. No, wait. Tyler. I don't think—
Slide.
I'm inside. I'm in Tyler's cave, literally.
I'm in Ireland. That little trip where anarchy settled on my brain. I'm kissing one of my friends and touching his waist and drawing his crotch to mine and oh I'm enjoying this little act of rebellion. I'm enjoying him getting handy, his tongue exploring my mouth and the shame, the beauty that only the forbidden pleasures can possess.
Slide.
My eyes were shut tightly, I don't even know when my arms got to Tyler's thighs.
Open your eyes, Tyler says, this is one of the greatest moments of your life and you're trying to sleep through it? I obey like a puppy and open my eyes.
Tyler's hands are on my chest, he's jumping on me, his stupid robe is still attached to his wrists. I can see the dark, purple, yellow and green uneven patches that adorn his skin and his face, they make me even more excited. My mouth is agape as I watch this distorted angel in front of me, he's beautiful in every way, not perfect, may God forbid him being perfect.
My hips suddenly move on their own. I suppose nature is still established deep inside my brain and the reproduction instinct is coming out. My hands tighten around his waist, his sweat is hitting my skin like tiny punches, his voice is getting louder and I can't get enough.
The position slightly changes before I can even notice. Now his arms are around my neck and he's fucking himself on me. I kiss him, he kisses me and we draw blood out of each other. He comes down to my neck and draws blood once again, my shirt is now tainted red, mixed with my sweat and his.
I can't suppress the instinct anymore. I pounce into him now he's under me and my hips move on their own. I'm not Jack or Joe or Mr. Whatever anymore. I'm a primal being driven by its primal desire.
I thrust into him. Hard. Contundent. Firm. My mouth meets his tits and sucks into them until they're purple too. My teeth get blood out of every inch of his body that's unmarked by me. Not caring if that inch is bruised by a rando at fight club, not caring if he cares. He does this as well.
We are now just giving into our pleasure and moaning like animals in heat.
“That's it, psycho boy.” Tyler whines. “Let go, fuck me like you mean it, beat me up.”
Don't mind me.
I punch him in sync with my thrusts. First in his face, then to his ribs, I punch him everywhere for a while and he's laughing, oh he's enjoying every painful second of it.
Then I touch his hand again, my kiss bunt into his skin and my soul is ready to evacuate again.
Five.
Four.
Three, twoone.
I fall next to Tyler in the bed, we're both exhausted and sore for multiple reasons. He gets a crushed pack of cigs out of his gown's pocket and lights one on. Takes a drag and blows the smoke on my face. I'm too exhausted to move or protest. There is no aftercare, no romcom stuff, but I couldn't care less. I just got back to where I was before, sleeping, but this time I could do it soundly, knowing that Tyler was right beside me, and that he would not leave my side for a while.