Chapter Text
“You have plans with Frank again tonight?” Becca asks from her spot at the kitchen table, she had slept over at Mel’s new apartment for the first time since Mel had the day off today and they were both still puttering around the kitchen in their pajamas after a late breakfast.
“What do you mean again? We haven’t met up since last week.” Mel says as she puts down the coffee pot a little too hard on the brand new stone countertop. She lifts it back up to make sure she hasn’t chipped anything; she’s never lived in a place this nice or new before and she wants to keep it perfect for as long as possible.
“You met up last week to watch a movie…” Becca says suggestively and Mel knows her thoughts on this, she’s not heard the end of it all week. A movie with a boy is a Date Mel… Becca has told her a few times now. Mel rolls her eyes and looks over the top of her coffee cup at her sister as she continues. “Plus you spend every day with him.” Becca reminds Mel with a suspicious raise of her eyebrows. “He’s practically your boyfriend”
“It was a medical documentary, Becca, and don’t say that, it’s not true and it’s disrespectful to him and to his wife.” Mel scolds her sister, they’ve been through this before as well. But Becca refuses to let it drop, every time Dr. Langdon comes up in conversation, her expressive face does the same thing and she asks the same annoying questions. Questions like, when is he going to ask you out? Have you kissed him yet? You do like him though, right, Mel?
“He likes you too though, I can tell!” She snaps back suddenly serious. Probably because Mel is being serious and Becca has a habit of mirroring her mood.
“Doctor Langdon does not like me.” She doesn't bother to argue that she doesn't like him though, they have had that argument as well and Mel never liked how it made her feel afterwards to lie to Becca and tell her she didn't care about him...
“Frank.”
Mel gawks at her sister.
“What?”
“Frank, he told you to call him Frank when we were in the car on the way home from trunk-or-treating at the hospital.”
Mel remembers that day and how he’d given them a ride home in the rain because Abby had come separately with the kids and taken them home early. She remembers the way his long hair stuck to his forehead as the three of them rushed to his car and he opened the door for her… The trunk-or-treating and its festive halloween mood had been somewhat overshadowed however, by the day after and the twelve hours from hell that fell on the thirty-first.
It had been the day she lost the eighteen year old boy named Aaron who’d been in a drunk driving accident and Doctor Langdon—Frank, had treated an attempted overdose survivor that just so happened to be a thirteen year old with terminal cancer. She remembers with a slight shiver the feeling of Frank's hand on her back when he had found her on the roof that night after their shift and they’d sat together in silence for over an hour.
She hasn’t told Becca about that though and besides, that was two months ago, they’d only been meeting up occasionally for coffee on Saturday mornings, sometimes he even brings his kids, Penny and Tanner. Or even more rarely he’ll drive her home from work and they end up sharing a soda or on Mel’s front porch before he heads home. It is not like they are dating and much to Becca’s disappointment, Frank is not her boyfriend.
“Why don’t you go get dressed so we don’t get the worst seats at the movie theater.” Mel says, not wanting to talk about Frank anymore.
Becca fixes her with a scowl as if there’s nothing she’d rather talk about than Mel’s love life, or lack there of, and hops out of the kitchen towards the guest room.
Mel sags against the counter, drains her coffee in one long gulp, and prays that Becca’s ride, which is scheduled for four, is on time and that she is on her way back to the center well before Frank arrives at five. She knows Becca’s feelings about movies with boys—she doesn’t want to find out what she might think if she knew Frank was taking her out for dinner.
Mel’s stomach does a little flip when she remembers how Frank had worked a night shift and he’d waited outside the ED until she arrived in the morning to talk to her about the new restaurant he wanted to try.
“It’s really close to your apartment… I figured I’d see if you wanted to try it, it could be like your new neighborhood spot” he had said excitedly despite the dark circles under his eyes that accentuated the blue of them.
Not a date, very clearly not a date.
Mel didn’t ask why he didn’t just try the restaurant out with Abby and tell her about it later if it was good.
She’d agreed right away and they’d texted to schedule for that Thursday once Frank had gone home and slept off the night shift stupor.
“You’re not dressed.” Becca says as she pokes her head into the kitchen and finds Mel still leaning on the counter with her empty coffee cup in her hands. She rolls her eyes and drags herself to her bedroom to get ready for the day.
—
Mel regrets her outfit choice the second they get to the movie theater and the heat is cranked up high to combat the December Pittsburgh chill. Her nice cashmere turtleneck even though it’s thin, and perfect for going from day to night like seventeen magazine taught her when she was twelve, becomes a sensory nightmare.
The theater is across town and it’s old, not one of the fancy places with recliners. Mel hates how small the seats are and how her arm presses against Becca’s as they watch the revival showing of The Sound of Music. She can’t stand it by the time Lisel starts singing to her soon to be Nazi boyfriend and Mel makes a a quiet excuse to Becca before ducking out of the theater and dashing for the front door.
She’s left her coat behind but the cold air on the street is a welcome change and it soothes her nerves. Mel takes a deep breath and uses the moment alone to check her phone.
Three Instagram notifications from Samira, two security alerts from Becca’s center and to her surprise, one text from Frank.
Hey, Abby left early for the weekend with the kids. I’m unexpectedly free for the afternoon
Mel’s mouth drops open and she checks the time stamp. He’d sent it twenty minutes ago.
She taps her phone and responds quickly,
I’m about half way through a showing of The Sound of Music at the Hoffman theater with Becca.
Frank’s read receipt shows that he sees the message immediately and Mel wonders what circumstances have Abby leaving him behind for the weekend while she goes off with the kids. Not that it’s any of her business.
Mel is about to add that she has Becca until four anyway but before she can type it Frank replies. He always was a weirdly fast texter.
Cool, I love the sound of music, I’m on my way.
No, no, no, she thinks. She can’t sit through the second half of the movie with Captain Von Trapp and Maria falling in love on screen sandwiched between Frank and her sister. She’ll never hear the end of it.
But—
There’s something about the idea of sitting in a dark theater with Frank's thigh against hers that she can’t help but to find exciting. When they’d watched the documentary weeks ago it had been at her apartment and he’d sat on the floor while she curled up on the far end of the sofa. There had been no touching.
Mel shivers and thumbs up reacts to Frank's message before she can change her mind. Then she ducks back inside, feeling much less itchy and a little nervous for reasons she doesn’t want to examine.
“Frank is going to meet us here” she whispers leaning in close to Becca as she stares wide eyed up at the screen. It takes a second for her words to sink in and then Becca whips around and smiles broadly at her. She opens her mouth to say something but Mel shushes her before she can. Becca falls silent and slowly turns back to the movie.
It can’t have been more than fifteen minutes but Mel hears the heavy clunk of the door behind them opening and she doesn’t want to seem too eager so she doesn’t look around to see if it’s him. Just as Julie Andrews steps out onto the dance floor and begins to dance the Laendler she feels him fall into the open seat beside her and Mel glances up.
Frank grins at her, lit only by the purple-blue of the scene playing above them and Mel’s heart skips beat. He’s closer than usual, and he’s leaning in, Mel notices that his hair looks a little windswept and his cheeks are patchy and red from the cold. She can feel the frigid air from outside clinging to him still.
“Hi.” Mel hisses, feeling her own lips pull into a smile that mirrors his.
“Hey…” he breathes.
“Hi.” Becca says a little too loudly from the other side of Mel and Frank reaches around Mel’s shoulders to fist bump her. His hand brushes the back of her neck on the way back to his lap though and Mel tries not to react. She makes sure Becca is back to paying attention to the movie before she looks at Frank again, he’s also watching the screen until he feels her gaze on him and his eyes shift downward towards her.
“How’d you get here so fast?” She asks, tuning her head to whisper closer to his ear.
“I live right around the corner” he whispers back, shimmying down in his seat a little so they’re at eye level. He’s so close that Mel can feel his breath on her face and it smells like mint and coffee, and it reminds her of early in the morning when he greets her at work, always leaning in a little closer than he needs to to say hi…
“How didn’t I know that?” She asks, the movie almost completely forgotten and Frank opens his mouth to respond but Becca shushes them dramatically and they both snap back to looking at the screen as she feels Frank shake with concealed laughter where his arm is pressed into hers.
She feels his laugh infecting her and swats at his hand that’s hogging the armrest. She thinks he’ll acquiesce and give her the coveted real estate but instead he flips his hand over quickly and wraps his fingers around her wrist. She stares at their hands where they touch and her skin prickles with some kind of nervous energy.
Her eyes flash to his and he’s already looking at her.
“Watch the movie.” She urges quietly and lifts her hand out of his reluctantly, planting it in her own lap firmly so she’s not tempted to let her fingers slide towards him again. Frank turns back to the screen and Mel pretends to pay attention to the movie she’s seen at least thirty times.
The end of The Sound of Music always bores her anyways, she always seems to lose interest after the wedding, and today is no different. Her mind whirrs and shifts from topic to topic as she stares blankly ahead but her thoughts all seem to come back to Frank sitting beside her. She nearly jumps out of her skin in the last ten minutes of the film, when the Von Traps are hiding in the graveyard, and she feels Frank's pinky reach across the seat beneath the armrest and fiddle with the seam on the outside of her thigh. She doesn’t look at him as tries to figure out what he’s doing.
He could just be fidgeting, she knows he’s always playing with his bracelet or a pen or… or he could be trying to get her attention. She doesn’t want to give it to him though, not when the movie is so close to the end. He can wait. And his fingers feel… nice on her leg. Especially when he flattens his thumb against her and his fingers grip into her thigh gently.
The music swells and the Von Trapps escape through the mountains like always, and Frank pulls his hand away before the house lights come back up — Mel feels like she can breathe again.
“Well, I’d hate to go hiking in those clothes.” Frank says and leans forward to look past Mel and over at Becca. “What about you?” He asks as she turns to him and Mel finds herself trapped between them.
“You missed the whole first half! We’ll have to watch it again some time… why were you so late?” Becca asks as she stands up and shoves the empty popcorn container into Mel’s hands.
“Oh I’ve seen it before Becs.” Frank says as if they're best friends. He tosses Mel a funny look that she can’t quite parse out before standing as well and stepping out into the aisle.
Frank and Becca walk together in front of Mel while she tosses their trash and she loses sight of them as they hit the lobby before her in the small throng of people. Mel checks her new apple watch and sees that it’s just past three and they still have plenty of time to get Becca home before her ride.
“Over here.” She hears his voice before she lays eyes on him and he’s smiling at her again with that same grin from before. Mel feels her stomach do a little drop and she admonishes herself to get it together before she joins them by the door and follows out onto the sidewalk. It’s gotten colder as the sun has started to dip and she goes to pull her coat on but the sleeves are all twisted and inside out from being balled up at the back of her movie theater seat.
She makes a small frustrated sound and Frank immediately looks at her and swoops in to help. His movement is swift like he’s done this a thousand times and he pulls her sleeves out so she can shove her arms in and pulls the collar of her coat snug around her shoulders. His hands linger at her neck for a second too long however and Mel feels his knuckles bump her braid.
She ducks away from him and looks over at Becca who is staring at them, agog.
“Come on, we gotta get you home so you don’t miss your ride.” She says and zips her coat before taking Becca by the arm.
“Ride?” Frank asks as he falls into step beside them.
Becca fills him in on the details of their plan for the afternoon including her ride back to the center.
“My car’s around the corner, I’ll take you now and then Mel and I can head to the restaurant a little early.” He offers with a shrug and Mel feels her face go red. She had purposely not told Becca they were going out for dinner and now she was looking like she was going to burst out of her skin as the smile on her face grew wider. Mel tried to communicate telepathically, praying for some kind of twin magic to help her out, to tell Becca not to say anything too embarrassing, but they never were good at the twin communication thing and Becca opens her mouth to say possibly the most embarrassing thing Mel could think of.
“So it is a date!”
Frank sputters and Mel ducks her head as she grabs Becca by the sleeve of her coat.
“Becca that's not… not appropriate.” She snaps, but Frank, ever kind and courteous puts his hand on Mel’s shoulder and laughs like there’s nothing to worry about.
“No, just dinner… Your sister’s too good for me anyway.” He says softly with his eyes twinkling in a way that makes him look younger and Mel’s mind can't wrap around his words when he’s making that face and his thumb is still pressed into her shoulder blade. He definitely didnt say… no I’m married. Or, no I don’t think of Mel like that and her head is spinning a little. Becca opens her mouth to say something but Frank points up the road and Mel looks up to see his black BMW parked along the street.
“Last one to the car’s a rotten egg.” He says, and he and Becca are off up the street, leaving Mel alone to catch up and try to get her emotions in order. She had felt great about their dinner plans, but now… now there was a layer of something thick and weighty covering the evening ahead of them. She wished Becca hadn’t said anything. She wished Frank had shut the date idea down entirely rather than… saying that…whatever that meant.
Becca is already waiting in the back seat and Frank is standing by the drivers side when Mel reaches them.
He looks at her over the roof of the car.
“Alright?” He asks just loud enough for Mel to hear, and her worries fade as she sees the concern on his face and the small smile on his lips. He always knew how to make things better, he always knew just what to say to cut the tension…
“Fine, yeah… Thanks for offering to take Becca home.”
He grins a little wider and leans on the roof but doesn’t say anything and they just stare at each other for a long second before Mel tears her gaze away and hops into the car.
“You think we’re gonna get snow tonight?” Frank asks when he starts the car and glances in the rear view mirror.
“Are we supposed to?” Mel asks, she hadn't checked her weather app in a few days and she’d canceled her cable subscription because the news just pissed her off. Becca makes an excited sound in the back seat and Mel laughs, she’s always loved snow, Christmas, anything wintery.
“They’re saying maybe two feet, but Chicago is getting like four.” He explains.
“Do you get another day off if it snows a lot? We could have another sleepover!” Becca suggests, leaning forward in her seat.
“No, the ED doesn’t shut down for snow, sorry.” Mel explains, looking over her shoulder.
Frank turns off the side street and onto the highway that takes them along the river and over the bridge towards Mel and Becca’s side of town again and the trio rides in companionable silence until Frank turns the radio on.
”What should we listen to?” He asks and Mel suddenly can't tear her eyes away from his side profile, the way his hair flops over his forehead like he’d forgotten to put any product in it this morning… the way his nose has a little bump in it that's highlighted by the setting winter sun behind him. She feels her heart race pick up and the need to feel his hands on her again threatens to consume her and his words from before echo in her mind.
Your sister’s too good for me anyway…
“Mel?” He asks, his voice soft, pulling her out of her cloudy reminiscing.
“Oh… whatever Becca wants is fine.” she says, shaking her head and looking forwards through the windshield again. God she really needs to get a fucking grip, she thinks.
“Katy Perry!” Becca says and frank taps the CarPlay screen until Firework is blasting out of the speakers.
It's not a long ride to the center and when Becca gets out of the car she leans down into the driver side window and waves at Frank saying a quick thanks, Mel steps out with her to walk her to the door.
“Becca…” Mel says seriously when they reach the entrance to the building, her sister turns and looks at her seriously. “I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier.” She says, taking her hand.
“It’s alright, I shouldn’t have said that… I—I know you’re embarrassed about it.”
“I’m not embarrassed!” Mel quickly deflects and she sees the irony immediately in her defensiveness. “Frank is a really good friend, I just dont… dont want to make things weird between us if he thinks I like him more than I should.” She rambles, trying to explain.
Becca looks at her blankly.
“Well… I hope you have a good snow day tomorrow, I’ll give you a call in the morning alright?” Mel says, putting her hand on her sister’s arm gently.
“Yeah alright, love you.” Becca replies, hiking her backpack over her shoulder and dipping inside.
“Love you…” Mel mutters even though she knows Becca can’t hear her, and she turns back to the car. Frank is leaning out of the window looking up at the sky like a weirdo.
“What are you doing?” She asks, jogging down the steps towards him.
“Trying to see if this weather forecast could possibly be right.” He said, straightening and catching her gaze. “I just checked my phone, it says blizzard conditions starting at nine.”
“And you can tell that from what? Looking at the clouds?” Mel laughs as she gets back into the passenger seat.
Frank just shakes his head and joins her in laughter as they pull out of the parking lot. It’s starting to get dark now and the confined space of the car, sans Becca and the annoying Katy Perry song is comforting after a day of loud noises and people.
“Have you worked in The Pitt during a blizzard before?” He asks quietly.
“Oh… uh, no we didn't get much snow last year and I was out of town when that one hit around new years.” Mel explains, tipping her head towards him, the light of the streetlights coming on makes his skin glow orange.
“Right…where did you go again? Somewhere weird I remember.”
“Greenland is not weird.”
“It’s not most people’s choice for a January vacation, Mel.” He laughs,
”I wanted to see the northern lights!” She argues back but he cuts her off,
“You could have gone to Aruba, or Jamaica!” he chimes, the smile evident in his voice.
“Or Bermuda… Bahamas?” She says, rolling her eyes.
Frank finishes the song as if unable to help himself,
“come on, pretty mama
Key Largo, Montego, baby, why don't we go?
Ooh, I wanna take you down to Kokomo.”
Mel bursts into laughter at his off key rendition of the beach boys tune and he chuckles alongside her. They laugh until Frank slows the car and begins to look for parking on a street that is a mere four blocks from her new apartment.
“How’d you hear about this place?” She asks.
“Oh… uh…” Frank starts and she can hear the trepidation in his voice. He puts off answering until he finds a parking spot then he turns in his seat to face her.
“I was looking up your new address when you told me you were moving…” He starts, and Mel is immediately curious as to why he was doing that.
“I moved a month ago, you've been to my place a few times now, why were you looking up my address?" She asks, pushing the door open and climbing out of the low passenger seat.
Frank follows her and they step onto the sidewalk together.
“I just… I wanted to make sure it was a safe neighborhood before you moved in.”
Mel falters and her mouth falls open. She can't tell if he's being patronizing, or just overprotective like he can be with his patients, or his kids, or if it's something else. She looks up at him to try and read his face but he’s just looking ahead and walking briskly.
Mel gets a funny feeling its not because he thinks of her like a patient or a kid… she thinks he just cares about her safety and it makes her warm from the inside out, she wants to lean on his shoulder and thread her arm though his—but this isn’t a date, and he still has a wife, and friends didn't hold hands… or grab each other’s thighs in the darkness of the movie theater… She thinks stupidly.
“Here.” Frank says when they reach the tiny restaurant that doesn’t look like much from the street. It’s a narrow building with a large window and a tiny neon sign above the door that says pizza. They walk in and it's busy, cramped with more people than Mel would have thought for a Thursday night, but the lights are low and the music isn’t too loud and Frank gives the host his name and they’re taken right away to a little round table in the back corner. Mel hasn't been on many dates in her life, and none in the last three years, but this place feels like exactly the kind of spot that someone would go on a date, and as she sits and looks around she notices that all the tables are for two. Even at the small bar people are paired off and talking close, she looks up at Frank and finds that he’s leaning back in his seat watching her.
“Nice place.” She murmures just loud enough to be heard over the low chatter.
“Just opened last week, that's why I didn't ask you out sooner.”
Mel chokes a little at his phrasing…
“Uh… oh, thats cool?” She mutters, picking up her water and gulping it down.
Frank lifts his menu and leans across the table,
“They do like personal sized pizza, wanna share a few different ones? They all look so good.” He says casually.
Mel nods and hopes the waiter comes soon, she needs a glass of wine. Or maybe a shot.
“Becca always makes us get plain cheese, I always keep a bag of pepperoni in the fridge cause she won't eat it if she has to pick it off.” She sighs, looking at her own menu, Frank is right, everything looks good, and there isn’t even a plain cheese pizza on offer.
“Well you should pick tonight then, I’m not picky, get whatever you want.” He sighs and puts the menu down, he’s looking at her intensely, like he wants to say something and Mel knows it's just pizza, but her chest gets a little tight at his words and the way he’s staring at her again… she reaches across the table and puts her hand on his arm briefly. He opens his mouth to say something but the waiter chooses that moment to take their drink order and Mel yanks her hand back and asks for a glass of Chardonnay, Frank gets a club soda.
“Is it okay if I drink? That's not gonna—“ she starts to ask,
“It’s fine, Abby drinks all the time,” he mutters waving his hand but then his face gets serious… “I mean… not like… all the time, I didn't mean it like that.” He stammers and Mel has to wonder if he maybe did mean it like that. He barely talks about her, Abby, but the things he does say don't make her sound all that great. Mel had only met her the one time at Trunk-or-Treating.
“She’s in Ohio for the weekend with the kids right?” Mel asks, trying to keep it light and brushing past the drinking comment.
“Yeah, she’s with her parents, they have a farm, we’re all supposed to go up there for Christmas…”
“What kind of farm?”
“Uh, just chickens and some ponies, it's not like a real farm, they don't grow anything.” Mel thinks that sounds pretty nice but frank sounds a little dismissive about it. “They don't even take care of the animals themselves, they have a groundskeeper that does all that.” He adds and his attitude makes a little more sense, she’s heard his complaints about rich assholes at work plenty of times.
“I bet Penny and Tanner have fun there though.” she sighs trying to lighten the mood, and Frank grins at the mention of his kids. She loves the way his face lights up when he talks about them, it never fails to make her smile in return.
“Yeah, they love it, they have a pony named Grinch, he’s a mean old bastard but Tanner thinks he’s the funniest thing in the world.”
Mel laughs and they continue talking about the kids and Mel tells him about how she and Becca went to pony camp before her parents split up. Their drinks arrive and Mel orders a fig and goat cheese pizza, an artichoke and prosciutto pizza and one called Green Boy, which has pesto and green peppers and arugula. Frank smirks at her when she finishes ordering,
“Sound good?” She checks.
“Sounds perfect.” He mutters and passes their menus to the server.
The wine is cold and crisp and just what Mel needed as the feeling of the alcohol hitting her bloodstream quickly makes her a little looser, less worried about what this is.
“It’s snowing.” Frank points out and she turns in her seat to look past the other guests at the window and sure enough, fat white flakes have begun to fall outside.
“It’s gonna be a bitch to get to work tomorrow if we really do get a lot of snow.” She grumbles and Frank raises his eyebrows at her in shock as he lets out a surprised laugh at her language.
“Would it be less of a bitch if I picked you up so you don't have to take the bus?” Frank asks and leans across the table again.
“I’m not gonna make you drive all the way over here just to head back to the hospital.” Mel argues, feeling a blush creep up her neck at the way he’s looking at her.
“You’re not making me do anything, Mel, you should accept some help for yourself every so often.” He says, his voice low and calm and suddenly it feels like he’s the only other person in the room, like his voice is the only one she can hear through all the noise. He’s right, of course. He usually is.
Mel just nods and lifts her wine to her lips before she realizes the glass is already empty.
“It might not even snow that much.” she sighs and Frank laughs gently.
“Yeah, we’ll see what happens.”
Mel looks over her shoulder and sees that the snow has started falling harder and suddenly she’s the least excited she’s ever been about snow before.
“So what do you think?” Frank asks suddenly not so seriously, she looks at him, not sure what he's talking about. “Do you like it here? Can you see this being your new neighborhood hang out?”
Mel shrugs.
“Becca won't like it.”
“Becca doesn’t live in this neighborhood.” He reminds her and she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear that’s fallen out of her braid and looks anywhere but at Frank who’s gaze is back to being intense.
“I don't know, doesn’t really seem like the kind of place to come alone…” Mel murmurs as her eyes land on a couple at the bar that are sitting so close that their barstools are touching. ”Besides, we haven't even eaten yet, what if the pizza sucks?” She asks, trying to change the tone back to lighthearted.
Frank laughs, and their food arrives and it definitely doesn’t suck, but three pizzas between the two of them was absolutely too much food. They end up with almost a whole Frankenstein pizza made out of leftovers and after a second glass of wine Mel doesn’t even complain when Frank pays the bill without asking.
“That pizza might be worth the embarrassment of being the only solo diner here.” She says when they stand up he helps her with her coat again.
“Or you could… ya know, invite me, I’ll never turn down Pizza.” He mumbles as he finishes putting his own heavy looking pea coat on.
They’re standing in the middle of the tight aisle between tables but Mel freezes when he puts his hand on her lower back and tries to guide her towards the door. She’s never experienced paralyzation but her brain jumps stupidly to spinal injuries and the associated loss of function, to explain why she can’t move. She wonders briefly if she pinched a nerve as she stood out of her chair but then Frank’s hand slides across her back until it's wrapped around her hip and he gives her a small tug just in time to move out of the way as a waiter tries to make it past them with a tray of glasses.
“Alright?” He asks, and Mel’s heart rate doubles as he leans close.
“Yeah… shouldn’t have had that second glass of wine maybe.” She lies and scurries towards the door with Frank at her back. They emerge into the winter wonderland and Mel notices that there's already about a half inch of snow on all the cars, the cold wafts over her face and slows her breathing, though she can still feel Frank’s hand on her like he’s branded her flesh. This whole thing was a bad idea, she shouldn’t have agreed to getting dinner with him, she thinks as she watches him start to walk towards the car—
Becca was right.
This was too close to a date for her to not feel— confused, and by the way Frank was acting, paying the bill, touching her casually, laughing at her stupid jokes… she had to wonder if he was maybe confused too.
She hurries to catch up behind him and when she falls into step beside him he looks down at her with a gentle smile, like nothing is wrong. Like this is all part of some plan she wasn't informed of.
“Frank?” She asks, a little annoyed at how much she likes saying his name and how her voice cracks a little as she does. He just continues to look at her as he walks.
“Why didn’t you leave town with Abby for the weekend?” she asks, feeling like it's a cop out for the question she really wants to ask.
“Work.” He says with a shrug, and she knows he has plenty of vacation days saved up, it's the end of the year and he’s hardly missed a shift since rehab. “Why?” He questions like he's daring her to continue the line of questioning.
“I dunno, a snowy weekend with your kids on a farm sounds a lot nicer than working a shift during a blizzard.” She mutters, trying to sound casual.
“If it was just my kids—yeah, that’d be great.” He says but his feet falter a little and he comes to a stop, Mel freezes.
“What… what do you mean?” she asks, though she knows it before he says it. He’s been dropping hints about it all month. All year really— And it's not like Mel hasn't heard what Dana says when Frank isn’t around. She knows things with Abby are bad, but this is the first time he’s been so direct about it.
“I never liked going there cause my in-laws don't exactly love me… especially after rehab, but now…” His voice trails off and he leans against the nearest lamp post, Mel notices that there are snowflakes clinging to his hair and eyelashes already and she steps closer despite herself.
“But now?” She parrots.
“I’m fine with Abby ignoring me at home, I have the kids and—and no one is there to see it, but it's really embarrassing when she does it in front of her parents.” He says it quickly, all in one breath like it's his deepest secret and Mel can't help herself, she knows he’d do the same for her if she was confessing something so heartfelt… she reaches out and her hand tangles awkwardly with his, their fingers twisting together.
He looks up at her and Mel’s taken aback by the way his eyes shine.
“It’s… really nice to have you to talk to, outside of work I mean, I— I don't really talk to anyone else but the kids.”
“Thats why you asked to come out tonight?” She whispers, and looks down as he adjusts his hold on her hand so that their fingers are laced together more securely and his thumb wraps around to stoke the back of her hand.
“I guess.” He sighs.
“I like talking to you too Frank… we don’t have to sneak around to restaurants across town from your house to talk though, you can just… text me when you need to.” She murmurs and there's something there that hints at what she really wants to say, and she knows he picks up on it because he squeezes her hand and looks at his feet. She wants him to drop it, she doesn’t want to have this conversation yet, or at all. They’ve been having such a nice night, the serious stuff can wait, but his hand is still in hers and she feels like she wants to lean into him, she feels like he’d let her.
“Mel…” He starts.
“Don’t, let’s just… just get going.” She stops him and tugs her hand away.
They reach the car and Mel feels silly letting him drive her the four blocks to her building but he insists since it's snowing and apparently she can't say no to him, ever, because she slides into the passenger seat and he reaches over to turn her seat warmer on when he shuts the door.
“I had a really good time tonight.” Mel says when he looks up at her as the car starts to warm up.
“Me too, thanks for letting me crash your movie.”
”Becca isn’t going to feel right until she makes you watch the first half, you know that right?” Mel laughs, glad that the mood has shifted back to friendly, friendly is safe…
“Well I guess we’ll have to do another movie night soon then.” He sighs and Mel thinks he’s reaching for her for a heart wrenching second but he puts his hand on the headrest of her seat to look out the back windshield as he backs out of the parking space.
“I’d rather watch something scary…” Mel sighs.
“You like scary movies?” He nearly snorts with laughter.
“Yes. I never get to watch them!” Mel says as she watches Frank take a wrong turn, away from her apartment. She doesn’t say anything though, because she loves riding in the car with him, especially since he hasn't taken his hand off the back of her headrest and his arm is mere inches from her face, if one wrong turn ends up as an extra five minutes in the car she’s not going to complain.
“We could watch a scary movie, I have practically all of them on blu-ray.” He laughs.
“Do you have The Texas Chainsaw Massacre?" Mel asks excitedly.
“Which one? I think the only one I don’t have is the two thousand and three one… with Jessica Beil?”
Mel makes a face, and shimmies a little in her seat.
“That one sucks anyway, the original is the best.” She explains.
His hand falls from the head rest and lands on the back of her neck,
“A girl after my own heart.” He sighs as he looks out the window and turns again. Mel feels frozen and also boiling hot when he's touching her, but it only lasts a second because he puts both hands on the steering wheel as they hit a slippery patch of the hill that leads to her street. There's something so… dizzying about the way he touches her so casually, every time he does it catches her by surprise and makes her blood race. She watches his hands as he concentrates on the road, his competent hands that always seem steady even when he’s working, or touching her, or driving up an icy Pittsburgh hill… she wants to kiss them.
“Frank, I do think I’ll take that ride in the morning if it's still up for grabs.” She mutters, and he turns and looks at her with a quick smile before refocusing on the road. Mel leans back in her seat, and tries not to feel like the worst person in the world for the thoughts that his hands are conjuring up in her mind.