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Upon their return to Erid they and Adrian had clung to each other with desperation. It had been λ weeks of nonstop movement around the globe to send Taumeoba off to 'Threeworld'. Rocky and Adrian had been at the center of a lot of it. Even before departing for Tau Ceti, Adrian had been a notable political figure and an intercultural diplomat, one of the first to band together to find a solution to the star sickness. They had always cared so much about Erid, they may have become a social figure, but at least one of their hearts was devoted to science. And they had spent years researching all that was known about Erid for fun. It meant when they came searching for people qualified to go, Rocky had been right there to volunteer.
They hadn't left the field in Rocky's absence. Actually it seems they had gone full throttle, working on every stop-gap fix that could save people and give them time until the ship came home. (They would later explain having thrown themselves into their work to avoid having to think about how empty their house was.) As a result, they were also roped into leading the mission for Taumeoba. They had also been given lead over Grace's biodome, but no amount of work could make that upset them.
However, despite remaining attached by at least one set of limbs at a time wherever they went, they and Adrian hadn't had much time alone. And after Grace's health began to improve and they were able to talk and laugh again, their body was finally leaving the survival mode they had been in for so so so many years. At least they were trying to. Their mind didn't seem to be getting the message.
★-----★
It had all been going so well!
For the first time since they had finally gotten back from their extended space voyage, they and their mate had an entire day off, at home, alone. And with their nerves having calmed down and their natural cycles regulating more easily while constantly around Adrian as a biological reference point, they really really really wanted to spend hours in their nest with their wonderful gorgeous mate who had waited so long for them. (Having spent even longer waiting than Rocky due to time dilation, they had realized with horror halfway through one conversation with Grace on the way back to Erid.)
And Adrian had been more than on board, they were both so very worked up at this point. They had been caressing each other in the ways Rocky had been convinced would forever remain in their memory alone. Each stroke or gentle tap sent their nerves into overdrive. They felt as if they were leaving fire in the wake of their fingertips tracing down their arm..
★-----★
Alarms blared throughout the ship, something had caught fire on board.
This was now the λrd disaster scenario actively plaguing the crew. Of course there was the disaster they had come out here to fix, the tiny creatures eating their star. Then the crew had starting dying, which presently left Rocky and V others able to help try and solve the fire. Iλ had already died. Every other was too weak to do much. Left in the med-bay day after day getting no better. Rocky still didn't know why they had seemingly been spared from this new space infection that was taking their crew out so quickly.
Why couldn't they do anything to stop it?
As the fire spread they worked with their crewmates to smother it as quickly as possible. One of them got badly burned. The arm never healed. Their cells had been too overwhelmed to rebuild while under attack. It had gone too slowly and whatever had been taking them out got to them first. Their corpse sat there for years in the quarantine room of the sick bay with all the others, still scorched and cracked from the heat.
Rocky had memorized every detail, in some vain attempt to feel less alone.
It didn't work.
They were still alone.
Alone.
Alone
Alone alone alone
And they would die alone they would-
★-----★
Another firm gentle tap ran through their side right over the heart nearest their mate mark. Adrian said if they truly could only get one of their hearts they claimed that one. If Rocky got to choose, they would have it, and the one nearest their mission tattoo would be Grace's.
That tap had finally brought them back to the present.
Adrian was still holding them, still pressed close, but they had stopped moving all except one limb. Rocky realized they had stopped moving too. Or more accurately, they had stopped effectively moving. They could now feel themselves shaking lightly against Adrian.
Damn it. Damn it all, all the way back to Tau Ceti. They had been so happy to finally be more physical with their Second Song after years and years and years of separation. Why then? Did their body choose now to show them visions of their crewmates miserable deaths. They thought they were getting better.
They just had to go and ruin it. It was doubtful Adrian would be willing to just go back to what they were doing with Rocky so obviously having become a nervous wreck. It made them want to curl in on themselves and cry. They hunched lower without meaning to.
"°I'm sorry.♭" They said so quietly they weren't even sure it had actually been out loud until Adrian spoke up.
"♪Why?♫" They asked, so gently. It was so simple, Rocky hadn't been clear it made sense that Adrian would need clarification as to what just happened. But Rocky knew they meant they saw nothing for them to be sorry for. And that was dangerous right now.
They pulled Adrian closer, beginning to feel the pressure building in their resonance chamber that would soon be a sob
"♩It's been so long. I just want to be close to you and my mind keeps taking me farther away. I feel like I'm going to lose you if I fall asleep or lose focus for too long.♬" they could feel the first small stuttering sobs creep out underneath what they spoke.
At this, Adrian began to drag their hand along the sides of Rocky's arms again, more slowly. Less frantic and sexual. It felt nice, but they really really really wanted to feel Adrian inside them once again. And they weren't sure if that was an option for today any more. But either way, the slow tracing of their carapace was bringing them quickly back to themselves and how warm they had been before the ghosts of their past came calling.
"𝄞Adrian- please..♫" They cried out softly, embarrassingly accompanied by another sob.
"♬Are you alright love? Would you like to continue?♪" Their mate coaxed them gently, all the while picking up the speed of their touch once more. Pressing more firmly and sending waves through their body in a way that drove them mad.
"♮Yes! Please! Please please please Adrian love- I want you so badly. I'm sorry for the odd things space has made of me.♩" they babbled out, joy ringing through them at the thought that they hadn't stopped their intimate moment in its tracks.
"♪Nothing that you have become to survive and still come home as yourself needs forgiveness. I will cherish all of you, new and old.𝄞" They purred out directly against them, their movement regaining heat all the while. Rocky's movements felt less coordinated in comparison, at least to them, as they got increasingly worked up. However Adrian was far from unaffected, and the low whimpers that became of their sobs seemed to be riling them up insanely fast.
Their angle shifted quickly and soon Adrian was tracing along their seam which had slowly been opening and dripping mercury onto their nest. Causing full body tremors to shake through them. "♩♬♪! Adrian, I don't deserve you.♭" Their mate traced the edges of their opening once more before they finally felt their ovipositor brush against the hand dipping beneath them both. Sending another round of shakes coursing through them.
"♬You may be right, you deserve so much more than me. And I am so very grateful that you choose to live your life by my side.♫" The intensity that Adrian had said that with, combined with their own ovipositor (extended, as opposed to Rocky who was just leaking like a mess this time.) brushing just barely past the lip of their entrance had them writhing.
They began moaning in earnest now, sounds slurred with their body open like this. It was wonderful. Their ovipositor twitched from where it was still tucked internally, ready to welcome Adrian's inside. If they would please please get to it-♮𝄞♪♬!!
Either they read their mind or had been watching them squirm and decided to finally take pity on them. The stretch and slide when Adrian finally finally pushed in was so incredible it nearly knocked them out right there. They knew they were screaming by now, but couldn't tell if they were saying anything intelligible. Adrian was rumbling against them with such a warm tone, completely losing themselves in sensation.
They were barely inside yet, but it had been so long it made little difference. They began slowly pushing further in, causing them both to sing out in their combined pleasure.
"♪Rocky- my love- I have missed how you feel, how you clench around me so beautifully-♫°♩" Adrian muttered as they continued pushing in, drawing another low whimper out of them. They sounded utterly debauched. Rocky knew damn well they were no more presentable, that wasn't the point. It was doing unbelievable things to them to be able to hear Adrian lose themselves to pleasure so close. To feel it as their words ran through where they were connected causing another sharp jolt of pleasure.
They could feel the ridges along Adrian's ovipositor bunch up and beginning to catch against their own already very prominent segmentation. It felt Divine. It almost made them sad to think how they were almost finished. As if this had to be the last time.
As they drew impossibly close to release they clung to Adrian with a vice grip, letting out a loud low melody that Adrian matched without a second thought. It pulsed through them both as they were both thrown over the precipice. They felt a rush of fluid inside them and savoured the feeling they thought they'd lost forever.
It felt almost as if they were back in ℓg, weightless and supported on all sides. Except Adrian was here and it was infinitely better than being in space anymore. Space was where people died. Or almost died. And they'd had enough of that. Here on Erid the people they cared about were as safe as possible.
They floated in unfocused bliss with Adrian for several minutes longer, never disconnecting as they simply held on.
After they both began to regain feeling beyond the subtle hum lacing through them Adrian shifted just enough to drag against their interior and oh-
They whined again, hypersensitive from the recent stimulation, but it felt so so so good and they just wanted more. Anything that Adrian would give them.
Adrian had stilled at their noise and then, very purposefully twitched inside Rocky. They began to shake again, vents working overtime to cool their rapidly overheating core. This had a similar effect on Adrian. They felt a tremor run through all 5 of their limbs as they suddenly gripped their arm just above their mate mark with desire seeping through them at the contact.
𝄞Beloved- please. Would you let me keep going? I want to find everything about you I have missed. I want to remember every part of you I had kept in the back of my mind in fear of the pain. I need to feel every part of you.♬" They were speaking so rushed and low it felt like an onslaught as it passed through their entire being and stuck in their hearts. As if they could keep the feeling of being so close with them forever.
They pushed out the only thing they could think in response;
"♮♪! Please, have me.♩"
Later on, much later, they have a more thorough reassuring conversation. And Rocky will remember this day for the rest of their life. But much of Adrian 'remembering' was lost to them. They only remember being so deeply happy that they were finally finally finally back home.