Chapter Text
Rain tapped against the striped corner outside the shop in a lazy soothing rhythm as always when the weather got teary. Karakura always smelled different after dark—wet pavement, cigarette smoke drifting from alley mouths, ramen broth from a restaurant down the block. The city felt alive without much bite on each corner, perfect for domestic life honestly.
Naruto Uzumaki leaned back in his chair with both boots propped against the counter, lazily flipping through a porn magazine he absolutely hadn’t paid for. Which wasn't his to be fair, this was more or less a freebie than anything else since he found this gem on the desk of one Kisuke Urahara.
‘I’m sure he won’t mind…’ He absently thought, turning a page in the less than family friendly magazine.
“Your taste gets worse every week,” said a voice from the back room, followed by the footsteps of entering a room.
It was his, so why the judgement? Naruto snorted without looking up. “And yet you still keep stocking these, Kisuke.”
The bead curtain rattled. Kisuke Urahara emerged with his fan hiding half his face, striped bucket hat tilted low, his eyes sweeping to land on him and sat there like some foreign object.
“I keep it in stock as a secret. That and my shop attracts a very specific clientele outside of candy.”
He snorted. “Lonely middle-aged men?”
“You.”
Naruto barked out a laugh. “I didn’t know I was middle aged, are you sure you just didn’t look at the mirror today?”
The old wooden shop creaked softly around them from the breeze coming through an open window. Urahara’s candy store looked harmless from the outside. Cheap snacks lined along the windows, dusty shelves, and toys settled on it. Nobody walking past would guess that beneath it was a dimension used by beings who could shatter buildings easily and other all soul society dohicks.
“Too early to be this nitwiticky isn't it?” The shinigami complained lightly.
Nobody would guess monsters slept there either. Not literally speaking of course.
“Never is it too early, sides, don't you think Ururu and Jinta running into these would spell doom for you?” Naruto yawned, stretching an arm over the back of the chair, his white jacket hung open, black shirt underneath clinging to lean muscle. A silver chain bounced lightly against his chest when he shifted. Jinta was usually the errand boy, but since he was doing another errand himself. Well Naruto was the victim today.
“True… “ Urahara gave it some thought, Yoruichi already gave him flack alot but she might actually kill him if he exposed the two to that filth. He stayed silent, not following up his words with anything else but a stare at Ichigo.
“You’re staring,” he mused, catching the other man's gaze, “a bit creepy, you know that?”
SMACK!
The blonde hissed in pain. “Ow! What was that for?” He nursed the spot where it stung, alleviating the pain but not the confusion at Urahara’s actions.
Kisuke Urahara’s expression was only amused, no doubt finding entertainment in his suffering like the bastard he was. “You were supposed to run an errand for me. Remember? Not only that but you were also supposed to get stuff for her, need I remind you how pissed she'd be?” He hummed, moving past Naruto and snatched the magazine from his hands. “And why even bother reading these? You can't even get off from this, you told me that.”
Powerful or not, the man's words made him spring into his feet to stand at full height. Not out of fear, but annoyance at the possible price to be paid being subjected to the mischief and stock of angry cat-like behavior from the woman they both knew and adored. Well… adored was a strong word. Yoruichi was something else to be described.
Now what was he supposed to do again?
Oh right.
“Fine, fine. Hold your horses old man.” He grumbled slipping past the hat wearing eccentric shinigami, and slid his white long coat over himself in practiced smooth motion. “No need to show your age.”
“I'm not old.” Kisuke laughed before he paused, “okay maybe I am, but you are too. We just don't look our age. Anyway… don't forget.” Urahara dug into his bag, the telltale clatter of metal was a sign it wasn't something for friendly playful usage. Then tossed an object towards Naruto who caught it without looking.
His fingers latched around the object, and found himself… curious. This didn’t feel like anything like a sword or device with familiarity, then he turned to look at the object on hand. It made him grin. “Oh, for me? Wow you shouldn't have.”
Urahara waved, playfully dismayed. “After all the trouble I went through to get that, I'd thought there'd be more gratitude.”
“I am showing my gratitude.” He hummed. “A revolver huh? Any chance you could get me another one?”
It was a rather large one. As if it were made for killing elephants rather than anything human sized.
“Sheesh…”
The closer he looked. This weapon… It was a work of art. Naruto felt the ivory steel on his palm, hiding a shadow of power underneath ready to be unleashed. Black engravings running down the barrel like twisting ink. A dark dragon coiled around the frame, with the handle colored in brass orange—and the nine round revolving cylinder was marked on each chamber by the Kanjis of numbers: Ichi, Nii, San etc.
“This thing is sexy.” He whistled, then looked at the man.. “Please tell me it shoots bullets that explode.”
“No. It does not explode.” Urahara smiled.
“Aww.”
“It does, however, fire nine condensed spirit rounds strong enough to remove most low-class Hollows from existence just with casual use. But with its design you can empower it with your own, so it could theoretically take out much bigger than that.” There he goes explaining the mechanics in a way without using simplicity. Classic.
Naruto grinned wider at that. “So it explodes people.”
Kisuke sighed tiredly. “Why do I even bother explaining things to you?” Always so simple…
“Because I'm your favorite.”
“Are you now?” He hummed, “or is it actually Yoruichi because unlike her. You're my biggest problem.”
Naruto pointed finger guns at him. “I'll make the argument for it being the same thing...” he paused, a smirk on his face. “So… when’s the matching set being completed?”
“Here he goes again being greedy.” Urahara sighed, “I told you, it took me a lot of time to get something like that made.”
“So it's a no?” Naruto barely hid the disappointment from his voice, it would've been so cool. “Here I thought you were a genius.” He flicked the revolver to the side, opening the cylinder to roll, testing just how much it felt being smooth. Hopefully maintenance wouldn't be such a drag, “yet you can't outsmart Japanese customs? Tsk tsk…”
Urahara felt a vein of impatience pop on his forehead, though less actual anger and more comical than anything. “Yeah yeah laugh it up!” He gripped both of Naruto’s shoulders, and pushed him out of the shop’s door without much effort. “Now get going, shoo! I've been needing what I told you for a long while now, get to it!”
Naruto only rolled his eyes but relented. The revolver disappeared into a ripple of distorted space near his hand, stored away instantly as he stepped out.
As for worrying about losing it in spiritual form, that wouldn’t be a bother. He just bonded it to himself—no need in worrying about not being able to use it outside of his gigai.
“Alright…” he muttered. “Grab groceries. Maybe pizza. Avoid Yoruichi murdering me. Sounds like a solid plan.”
There was a pause as well, an image of an orange haired teen flashed in his mind. He hadn't talked to him for a while after that accidental cake mishap happened. That boy was trouble. And Naruto liked trouble.
“…Might go see Ichigo too.”
That kid had way too much spiritual awareness for a human teenager, still rough around the edges though. Angry too. Reminded Naruto a little too much of himself sometimes, but hey! He had potential… if there was any way powers would manifest on him, but seemed unlikely.
“Okay, pizza and ramen after errands.” He murmured to himself, finishing the quick warm up and headed down the street, coat flapping behind from the gentle early afternoon breeze.
The streets of Karakura were quieter this far from the shopping district, the only sounds were from the ambience of the wind, and distant clatter of metal from stray cats running across rooftops.
A biker tore through the intersection ahead of him, music blasting loud enough to rattle nearby windows before disappearing down another street. Somewhere nearby, someone was yelling over baseball scores through an open apartment window.
Okay. Maybe not too quiet.
Naruto walked without much hurry. Honestly, he could’ve flash stepped across town and gotten the errand over within five minutes but then he’d have to go back. His eyes drifted sideways slightly in thought. Seeing a Plus sitting quietly beneath a bus stop awning nearby. Elderly guy. From the looks of it probably died only a few days.
The old soul noticed Naruto staring, and was shocked. Naruto only gave him a small two-finger salute. The ghost nodded back awkwardly. Anyway, going back that quickly meant Kisuke finding another thing for him to do.
Hell no. Doing errands was one thing but he was not an errand boy, he had his own job for crying out loud!
It didn’t take him long to arrive at his destination. The convenience store doors slid open automatically as he stepped inside, meeting the cold air instantly refreshing him with whatever storefront fragrance it naturally had to calm him.
“Rice… tea leaves… cat food… Jesus, does she eat the cans too?” Naruto muttered while pulling the crumpled list from his pocket again, staring at it more confused by the second. “Why the hell does she need this much cat food anyway? She literally changes forms whenever she feels like it.”
A passing high schooler buying some snacks glanced at him strangely hearing the mutters.
Naruto blinked. “…What?”
The kid immediately looked away and speed-walked down outside and into the sidewalk.
“Huh.” His lips pursed in thought, people in Karakura could be jerks sometimes. “Wonder what that was about…” he sighed, “anyway I should get the stuff Yoruichi wanted from the list. Urahara will throw a fit if I only got hers…”
People in Karakura did that a lot around him; most couldn't actually see spiritual beings however, but sometimes they still picked up on things subconsciously. An Instinct of sorts, a six sense. Like animals sensing predators before they could comprehend the danger.
He slid into a corner, grabbing a basket. Throwing in a stack of rice packets first. Tea leaves, then cat food—a lot of cat food cans.
“She better give me a kiss after all these…” he murmured to himself, then at the corner of his eyes, Naruto saw an older woman beside him slowly moving her cart further away hearing those words.
The blonde frowned. “…Okay now you're just being rude.”
He tossed another can into the basket anyway, sighing in acceptance. Whatever. The fluorescent lights overhead buzzed softly while rain began to patter against the windows outside for a few minutes, everything stayed quiet. Naruto’s hand reached for the cup of ramen without even looking—beef flavor, not because it was his favorite, but because it reminded him of something rather than someone.
A long time ago.
A version of himself that felt very far away now, like trying to remember a dream you had as a kid but didn’t quite have an exact clue, he left the store quietly and fist pumped like he accomplished a difficult task.
Naruto took a shortcut through a covered alleyway, just so he wouldn’t get soaked from the sky's tears. It was a quiet day, something to be appreciated, especially with the life one like him lived. Maybe he’d get to—
CRASH!!
Rubble flew everywhere as the wall in the alley blew open, in a spray of concrete and screams of terror as an innocent man was held by a hollow through the bricks… just about to bite his head off, until it paused sensing him nearby.
He closed his eyes. “Just had to speak too soon had you?” Naruto groaned.
Though beneath the veil of exhaustion was a thrill of excitement. He hadn’t gotten to stretch his legs for over a week now, and this opportunity presented himself.
The Hollow was big.
Not impressively big that’ll have you rethink existence—but big enough to rip a chunk out of a concrete alley wall on its way through rebar jutted out like an exposed bone. A white mask split by a grin that had too many teeth, not a sense of sanity in that Centipede body. Six uneven limbs, one held the man like a toy ready to be chomped on. A tail that kept slamming the wall behind it, like it hadn’t figured out where the rest of itself was supposed to go.
Naruto stood at the alley entrance with grocery bags in both hands. He looked at the Hollow.
The Hollow looked back with his eye—well, turned its mask toward him. It was the same thing anyway for them, he knew that personally.
Without wasting a single second Naruto glanced down at the bags. “…Give me a second.”
He set them carefully against the wall under a shallow overhang, just out of the rain. Adjusted them once, like that mattered where they were positioned. Then straightened up, rolled his shoulders, and cracked his neck—left, then right.
The Hollow screamed. It wasn’t so much sound, more or less pressure. Windows rattled and the feel of the alley seemed to tighten around it. Somewhere, a cat bolted.
Naruto just yawned, and flicked his revolver into existence. “Alright,” he said, almost casual with a grin on his face. “Let’s do this.”
And fired.
BLAAM!!
The reiatsu empowered spirit-bullets struck the limb that held the man, he fell to the ground and ran instantly without waiting to wail or question what just happened. Just ran like a marathon prize of a million yen was on the line.
“Take care! Victim-guy!” Naruto yelled at him. Now that he could focus on this Hollow… It was time for fun. No need to go all out now.
A limb raced towards him, reacting to the bullet that struck him. The second limb came down fast, concrete cracking under the impact where he'd been standing half a second ago. He'd sidestepped without any particular urgency, and used the appendage as a handstand.
“Come on! That's all you can do?” He taunted.
The Hollow roared in protest, Naruto heard a tell of annoyance in that shriek—almost human, a remnant of a person that was once in there.
“Geez man, with a voice like that you’d make for a good idol!”
Another limb came flying to sweep where he stood, only to miss thanks to a well timed backflip. It helped that the attack felt a bit too telegraphed all the way from Narnia. The Hollow yanked the limb back. He rode it up, twisted off the top of the arc, and dropped back to the ground in a crouch that he didn't need to be in. The force of his landing slightly cracked the floor.
There was no necessary guideline for doing this, Naruto just thought it looked good.
And it did look good.
“Come on,” he mocked, tilting his head at the Hollow like he was genuinely encouraging it. “You've got six of those things. Try coordinating for once!”
Seriously? Why attack one at a time. They should at least make this challenging by launching simultaneous strikes, it was only logical and served their own benefit to themselves instead of whatever random bullshit go academy for combat they attended.
College would straighten them up. But there was no Hollow College available for all. So he'll make one instead, protected with fists, a gun and weapons—all kinds of other things.
Almost as if hearing those thoughts, four tentacles finally raced across the air towards him. “Finally!” And the childlike joy in his eyes turned to glee at finally having the opportunity to have some fun with.
Naruto dashed forwards, rolling the revolver mid-air as they soared towards him without any hint of stopping… Well when in doubt because of a lack of a component.
Just make one yourself.
The fight went on for the better half of thirty minutes, Naruto showed no signs of exhaustion inside his gigai body—despite the fact it handicapped him on fighting because of the design feature of being unable to withstand the true spiritual pressure of a Shinigami, part Hollow in his case…
But he couldn't lie and say this wasn't just as fun, being forced to fight an enemy so easily dispatched at his natural state, the adventurous joy and explicit challenging appeal of fighting at an enjoyable ground… well it thrilled and pumped the blood hot inside him.
But nonetheless he felt bored again. Why?
The Hollow was already falling apart when Naruto stopped taking it seriously. Not that it was true, he never took it seriously at all, this was just fun at least until it started losing.
Not because it had suddenly become weak technically, but because it had already spent everything it had trying to stay whole. The limbs still moved, still swung, still tried to force him into a corner like repetition would defeat him but alas…
The corrupted spirit was on its last legs. Riddled with bullet holes it couldn't patch, while Naruto fiddled with the weapon mid-battle. It wasn't his main weapon, but a substitute no doubt felt more or less appropriate to practice with.
Okay, maybe it might've been because it got weak. Not suddenly of course, but still weakened all the same.
Naruto shifted his weight slightly to his left, letting one strike pass just close enough to feel the wind of it, then stepped inside its range without really rushing, he just slid in without resistance. The revolver came up in the same motion more out of habit born from shooting than any kind of urgency.
BLAAM.
One of the limbs snapped clean off at the joint and dissolved mid-air, scattering into pale fragments that the rain immediately swallowed from the opened holes above.
“Yeah,” he winced, playfully then smirked . “That’s better.”
The Hollow recoiled in horror and something like pain. Its body twisted wrong for a second, like it forgot which direction it was supposed to exist in. Another limb came down anyway, slower now—telegraphed without so much a problem.
Especially with how desperate and uncoordinated this Hollow was.
Then came the last one. Multiple tentacles snap down towards him and Naruto didn’t even fully dodge it with full body motion. He just leaned out of the way and let it hit concrete instead, the impact shaking dust loose from the alley wall, one of limbs stuck through on the ground.
it was an opportunity.
He clicked his tongue. “You’re getting sloppy, now you're boring.” The Hollow answered with a sound that used to mean something with words it said, instead this was the sound of a long lost individual lashing out from corrupted influences in death.
He lined up another shot.
BLAAM.
This one took out the base of its movement, and the whole thing dropped unevenly like a sack of tires, dragging itself against the broken ground like it was offended by gravity being still applied to it. Naruto watched it struggle for a second longer than necessary, then lowered the revolver slightly.
Not out of mercy, but rather timing where it would snap at, like it would sharpen his senses by thr hundredth.
A flicker of recognition flashed in the Hollow’s mask, catching his scent. Betrayal and anger colored the monster’s eyes while talking at the very thought of…
Wasn't the first, shouldn't be the last.
“…You’re still in there somewhere, huh,” he muttered, mostly to himself
There was no response that made sense of it. Just noise, something familiarly useful for him to detect with—experience and abilities alike.
Naruto exhaled through his nose, rolled his shoulder once, then fired again.
BLAAM. BLAAM.
The rhythm stopped being a fight after that. It turned into a cleanup by an exterminator. Each shot didn’t feel like a field test of an experiment so much as it felt like a correction to be fixed. This should've been done earlier but what fun would he find then?
Regardless, no point in lingering about wasted past spoils. The Hollow’s form broke down in uneven stages. First movement. Then structure. Then even the idea that it was supposed to be standing here at all.
By the time the last few shots landed, it didn’t just begin fading. It was just… unraveling like a bowl of spaghetti that fell high. Naruto lowered the revolver fully when it was over, letting the cylinder hang open for a second before snapping it back once he filled it with spirit bullets.
Rain surged through an open space above after the Hollow slashed open a tarp that covered the alley from any further water spilling onto it. No longer had been its purpose other than another hole for rain to seep in thanks to their fighting, but honestly? Could’ve been worse.
He stood there for a moment, staring at where it had been. “…Well,” he exhaled, low and flat. “That was anticlimactic.”
Each word unable to hold in the disappointment at the quick submission of the enemy hollow against him. His attention shifted away from where the Hollow once was.. The grocery bag sat where he’d left it, untouched, stubbornly ordinary against the aftermath of violence. Naruto let out a small breath of relief.
Still there.
He walked over and picked them up again, rolling the weight as if getting used to the domesticity of grocery shopping once more.
“Yeah,” he muttered, already turning away, “she’s definitely gonna say I took too long.”
He started walking without waiting for an answer from the alley, stepping through the puddles without looking down—like he didn’t want to risk seeing anything staring back. Like the eyes of a young boy, hungry and starved while underneath was the mask of a corrupted half of a monster waiting for its prey…
He felt another two streets from Urahara's shop.
Small one. Freshly turned, still learning what it was—the reiatsu signature had that particular unsteadiness to it, like a new flame before it figured out which way the wind was blowing when it came to life for the first time ever. It was crouched behind a vending machine at the end of a narrow side street, which was almost sad. Not threatening. Just lost in the way newly turned Hollows were lost, all hunger and no direction yet…
Naruto didn't break stride even if it were something tragic. Because that energy? It was a child’s. He didn’t dare show emotion otherwise he’d break at the loss of such an innocent soul to corruption. He set the bags down against a telephone pole, drew the revolver in one motion, turned the corner, and fired before the Hollow had fully registered he was there.
BLAAM.
Clean through the mask. Center, and painless.
The Hollow made a sound that was almost relief before it came apart, dissolving in pale threads that the atmosphere of rain absorbed without ceremony. The chain of fate—whatever remained of it—flickered once and was gone. Purified. His job was done.
He was back to the bags before the last fragment finished fading and picked them up.
Naruto didn’t pause, and kept walking. “Rest easy,” he murmured a quiet and quick prayer that the soul of the child would rest easy in the afterlife.
The shop lights felt warm even through rain-blurred glass, that amber spill that made Urahara Shoten look like it sold sweets instead of secrets. Outside, Karakura kept raining like it had unfinished business.
The door slid open with a tired jingle.
Naruto shoved in with his shoulder, bags in both hands, water dripping off him in uneven lines. He kicked the door shut behind him.
“I'm back,” he called, like anyone had been waiting.
From above—something dropped without a sound or warning: A black cat landed on the counter with infuriating ease, as if gravity had personally apologized to her on the way down because she was the one who owned it.
Yoruichi Shihōin in cat form stared at him. “You’re late.” She said in that deep masculine voice, it was strange why it was that way in her cat form.
Naruto blinked at her. “That’s what you’ve got for me? Not ‘hey, you’re alive’?” He placed a hand on his heart mockingly playful.
“You’re standing n in front of me,” she replied. “Alive was already assumed, I’m not going to state the obvious.”
He snorted, setting the bags down on the counter. “I ran into two Hollows today, man they were difficult.” Naruto groaned ironically. They weren’t at all difficult, he just liked the fun and acting humble.
“Lying doesn’t suit your pretty face, Naruto.” She snorted, licking her paws.
“Aw, you think I’m cute?”
From the back, a lazy voice drifted out in an echo like it belonged to the building more than the man. “Stop flirting, you’re dripping on my floor again.”
Urahara didn’t bother appearing yet. Just his voice calling from inside like some haunting ghost with regrets, well… in a way that was true in another point of view but that was a topic for another day.
Naruto glanced toward the curtains trying to find where it came from. “Your floor can survive being a little wet. It’s tougher than you are.” The feline shinigami snorted in amusement.
“I heard that,” Urahara replied. “Don’t go laughing at my expense, I could die.”
“You were meant to.”
The cat had already started inspecting the bags, always critical in that familiar way like she’d done this a hundred times, which she had, still found mildly insulting; he didn’t just count what he brought. “This is the right brand,” she observed. “But this isn’t—”
“Enough?” Naruto interrupted, leaning on the counter glancing down at her. “Of course it is.”
She almost hissed. “You said last time you’ll get the right amount.”
“Hey I told you last time it was a supply issue.”
“It wasn’t just that you brought me something that tasted like paper.” Yoruichi glowered at him, barring her fangs. Though it was less hostility and more banter than anything.
“Have you heard of something called emergency procurement? Because that’s what it was.”
“That’s not a thing.”
“It is if you think about it too hard.”
She gave him a slow look, and huffed. “Why are you proud of always being a smartass?”
“Because I’m smart and handsome.” He retorted.
Urahara finally stepped through the curtain, fan half-open, grin already in place. “I see you’re still feeding her like she owns you,” he smiled.
“With how much she keeps ordering me around, I’d say so,” Naruto replied immediately casually, without paying any seriousness to his words
“That is not how ownership works,” Yoruichi said without looking up, sniffing the cans.
Naruto shrugged. “Feels accurate though.”
Urahara tilted his head, glancing at the other grocery bag. “Did you get the seals I asked for?”
Naruto tapped the side of one bag with his foot. “Yeah. And before you say anything, no, I didn’t break any of them. Much.”
“That’s concerningly vague.”
He chuckled, "No, that's me being considerate old man, try to keep up.”
Yoruichi hopped down from the counter, landing lightly beside him. She circled once, then stopped near his wet boots like she was judging the concept of why he was soaked in water like he hadn’t run through rain just to get here.
“You got followed,” she observed catching the whiff of a Hollow trailing behind him, something distinctively that was him. “You were speaking the truth I see.”
Naruto didn’t bother pretending otherwise, they knew his business. They all shared the same one, what was the point? “Yeah.”
“Gave you much trouble?”
“Not really no.” He shrugged.
“Dead?”
“Eventually.”
“Good.”
Urahara sighed. “I miss when people used to say things like ‘good morning’ in this shop.”
Naruto wiped rain from his hair, in a mock salute. “Good morning.”
“It’s almost evening, man.” The shinigami sighed, fanning his face with his fan.
“So? Still a good greeting..”
Yoruichi brushed past his leg, tail flicking against him like an afterthought as she glanced up to his coat. “You’re bleeding.”
Naruto glanced down, a thin slick of blood on his white outfit, and he shrugged. “Wasn’t mine, don’t worry.” Though laundry taking out that stain would be a bitch though.
Urahara leaned slightly closer, fan lowering. “You didn’t notice that?”
He didn’t admit defeat, like Sun Tzu said. Misdirect your enemies or something. “I noticed. I just didn’t care.”
Yoruichi looked up at him. “You always say that like it’s impressive to not notice blood on you.” The implication of him being just full on bloody everytime hanging in the air.. There was a degree of concern in her voice, a lilt of protectiveness he couldn’t help but inwardly smile for. Despite all her stand-offish behavior, he was her long-time friend. She cared.
“It is.”
“No,” she retorted, a bit more heated than she’d expect. “It’s just annoying.” Then, quieter—she sighed. “You should sit down.”
Naruto blinked at her. “Is that a concern?”
“More of an instruction.”
The man had the gall to grin at her. “Sounds like a concern.”
“No It’s not.”
From the back, Urahara chuckled, agreeing with the assessment of the cat lady. “That sounded like concern.”
“Don’t start,” she said.
“It's not mine anyways. I’ll just clean it…” Naruto dropped onto the floor, took off his wet boots and settled on the edge of the elevated floor, watching her like she was the more interesting subject. “You worried about me, Yoruichi?”
She didn’t answer immediately. Just climbed back over to the table at the center and sat where she could look down at him properly. “No,” she responded. “I’m deciding how much effort you’re going to cost me later after asking for an outfit.”
“Not a thing because I’m the one who’s going to be doing laundry.” He gestured at himself annoyed..
She instantly shut that down. “No you aren’t. I help Tessai with the menial work, and I'd appreciate your acknowledgement of it. Especially since my powers help clean the clothes better.”
“.... that’s a little stereotypical for a woman don’t you think?” He voiced it aloud.
That statement got him a swipe of claws that he narrowly avoided.
Urahara set a hand on his chin. “This is why I prefer the newer machines, less… complicated behaviors like yours.” He flicked a piece of paper which Naruto flicked back at him.
“You can barely build anything that doesn’t explode,” Naruto snorted. “Let alone proper machines, just stick to soul business.”
If he was offended. Urahara didn’t show it in his gleaming eyes. “At least they're honest about their intentions, and aren’t always brat.”
Yoruichi flicked her tail once and climbed onto Naruto’s shoulder. “You’re both too loud tonight.”
The blonde only grinned slightly. “Don’t act like you don’t like it.”
“Tolerating isn't the same as liking.” She denied instantly. “There’s a bit of a difference there, no?”
“That’s closer to liking than you think.”
Yoruichi leaned forward at the corner of his face just slightly, eyes narrowing into slits. “And how is that mister?” she pressed.
Naruto raised both hands a little. “Hey don’t ask for specifics. I just like being tolerated by you.”
Silence, nothing awkward just the kind that meant nobody wanted to ruin it first as they stared at each other.
Urahara opened his fan again, blocking his view of them. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear any of that and return to my own brand of suffering.” Though there was a grin on his face that was barely hidden.
Both of them didn’t think too much about it, considering how awkward enough it was.
Naruto pushed off the floor, feeling a bit beat staying in his gigai longer than usual. “You’ve got training for me?”
Yoruichi hopped aside as Naruto moved past, brushing his shoulder with her tail as he went. “Don’t die,” she cut in casually stretching her cat-legs.
“Yes,” Urahara responded to him. “Unfortunate for you.”
“Unfortunate? Nah. I’m feeling fortunate today.” Naruto grinned before he paused just enough to glance back at the feline shinigami hearing her words. “You know Yoruichi it sounds like you’d miss me much.”
“I’d notice the noise was gone.”
“Well it's the same thing!” He called out following Urahara into the shop’s basement or otherwise, a pocket dimension.
She didn’t argue and that was the closest thing to agreement anyone ever got from her without a blade involved.