Archive of Our Own

Dan spent nearly the entire journey to Manchester thinking about Phil’s cock down his throat.

Chin in his hand, eyes out the window, music blasting through his headphones, he thought about the things they got up to the last few times he visited. Phil was as eager as a puppy to take him around town and show him all the little places he loved, places that wouldn’t mean a thing to Dan outside of their importance to Phil. Dan had always followed him around, grateful for the chance to be in a more interesting town than his own, but mostly happy just to be with Phil. Sometimes, he would catch himself just wishing he could sit and stare at him for ages, just to make sure he was real, before realizing that real people with real friendships have to do real things. So he let Phil choose the real things. 

And then, in the secrecy afforded by nighttime shadows, huddled together under Phil’s duvet, were the realer things, the electric things. There were warm, wet kisses that met in the middle, that lingered on Phil’s earlobe, that found Dan’s neck. Dan’s eyes fluttered shut thinking about those nights, especially when Phil’s parents weren’t home, when the kisses sometimes turned into a bit of frenzied grinding, or a hand slipped underneath a waistband. Phil’s hand was so warm, and so strong, and he was so kind and careful with Dan. It never went very far beyond that, and kissing always remained above the collar bone, but it was intoxicating enough that it had lingered in Dan’s dreams for weeks after he came home. 

So Dan had decided: he would be the one to take it further. He’d been researching, brushing up on what a “good blowjob” entailed, determined to not only give Phil the best blow he’d ever received, but to be so good that he ruined Phil for any other man who wasn’t Dan. 

He’d done it before, he supposed, but he didn’t really care about it then, not like he did now. To him, this is when it actually mattered. And now that it mattered, it was time to get good. 

With a feeling like he was revising for an exam, Dan considered the task before him all the way to Manchester, only shaken from his state when the train began to slow, coming to a stop at the station. 

And when he got off the train, and saw Phil waiting for him in the same place they’d met last October, for a moment, he forgot about his entire plan. 

When he was far away from Phil, stuck in his room (literally) and in the closet (figuratively), Phil became a sort of beacon, or icon, for every repressed feeling that Dan thought he’d never have the chance to share with a world outside of Phil. All in one, Phil was safety, reassurance, romance, and sexuality. The longer Dan spent away from him, forced to be content with Skype calls and text messages and — he would never admit it to Phil — Phil’s own YouTube videos, the easier it was to conjure Phil’s image as a parochial vision of heroism, sexualized and romanticized as Dan’s personal “savior.”

Dan would’ve hated that if he consciously knew he was doing it. He hated it when people put him into boxes, and he would’ve felt guilty for imposing that on another person. But he didn’t know, not really. It hardly phased him when, in the moment he met Phil’s eyes across the platform and began to walk towards him, he flipped that switch in his brain. 

Suddenly, Phil was the same he always was when they were together. He was goofy, nerdy, and a bit of a dork. He talked a lot about things that seemed to just pop up in his brain that didn’t matter, but Dan loved to listen anyway. He walked with a slight stoop in his shoulders, and his clothes smelled freshly laundered, and without realizing it, Dan wasn’t thinking about blowjobs; he was thinking about the video games Phil had at his house, and the walks they took around town, and the way Phil laughed after a stupid joke. 

“Hi,” Phil said, stopping at arm’s length from Dan. He was smiling, and Dan wouldn’t have thought it to be awkward were it not for the knotted fist Phil was half-sticking in his pocket. 

“Hi,” Dan smiled back. 

“Are you hungry? Mum’s gone out for errands so I was thinking we could go ahead and get groceries on the way home.” 

Dan started walking, Phil joining in beside him.

“Sure. I could also go for a snack there. What sorts of things did you have in mind?”

Dan didn’t really like to talk about his previous experiences with men. This was largely a result of not having anyone to talk to about being attracted to men in the first place, but a fair portion of the reticence belonged to the experiences themselves. 

It wasn’t that they were awful. He’d been more than consenting on the odd occasion that a guy had asked him for one, and he really didn’t mind it. He wished they’d have been a little bit more gentle, and maybe a little bit nicer, but he didn’t bear any trauma from it. It’s not like he was expecting a cock down the throat to be a pleasant experience. He was just hoping that it was a good experience for the other guy, that maybe the other guy would think a little more favorably about Dan in return, or call him again, or be nicer to him at school. 

Or, at the end of the day, Dan was hoping that those experiences would make him at least a little better about giving head when it would really matter in the future. But he didn’t want to think about it too much, in the fear that he would find something that would scare him away. 

For Dan, it was bad enough to be gay. It would be so much worse to be gay and not actually enjoy any of it. 

Phil hadn’t really asked him for details about his history. He’d asked once, over Skype, if he’d done anything with other guys, and Dan had nodded. He didn’t offer up much more than that, and quickly changed the subject. 

Dan risked a glance over at Phil now, slurping on steaming Ramen noodles from a styrofoam cup on the other side of the couch. They’d picked up a few at the shops earlier, along with some other quick meals, and had been playing video games ever since they got back.

Given Dan’s history, he was a little hesitant at the thought of blowing Phil, at first. Their friendship — and even the quiet, more tender moments they’d shared at night — was such a soft thing to him. He’d never felt more endeared to another person in his life, not platonically, romantically, or sexually. He didn’t want anything to get messed up, especially when what they had was so nascent and impressionable. 

But then he thought about those other times, with other men. He thought past the roughness of it, and the shame of having hooked up with someone that may not have been good for him, and thought about the better moments. There were those times, when, cock down his throat and fist in his hair, he let the embarrassment of the position overtake him, and the slutty feeling within him rose to the occasion. When that feeling appeared, sultry and hot, it made his body warm all over. He loved it. Those were the few moments when he felt like he had control, when he was the one running the show. 

When he thought about Phil on the other end of that feeling, he suppressed a shudder. He may not love giving head, not when something like that was so rough, but if it was Phil? That, he could enjoy. 

And so he had poured himself into his research, preparing for the moment when Phil would, inevitably, ask him for one. 

The problem that Dan was encountering — twenty-four hours into their visit — was that Phil wasn’t asking him for one. 

It wasn’t a huge problem, not necessarily, it was just that a guy had never gone this long without bringing it up. If Dan was another kind of person, it might’ve worried him, might’ve made him think that Phil wasn’t all that into him or something. But no, Dan was beyond that point. He knew how they felt about each other. He knew that that was safe. 

Maybe he was shy? That wouldn’t be beyond the realm of possibility, especially for Phil. Dan had curated the majority of their first touches, but even then, he could tell it was because he was just a little bit braver. Phil always responded to those gestures in equal measure, it was only that Dan had to be the one to break the seal. 

These were the thoughts that circled through his head as he laid in Phil’s bed, the water in the bathroom across the hall beating against the tile. They spent so much time together during these visits that showers, whether they be Phil’s or his own, were the only opportunities he had to really think by himself. 

When the water cut off, and Phil returned to his room with a towel around his waist and a towel across his shoulders, Dan stopped thinking so hard. 

Phil caught sight of him in the midst of picking up clean clothes, and stopped.

“What?”

Dan realized too late that there was a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He tried to ease his face back to a neutral expression. 

“Don’t worry about it. Just. Hurry up.”

Phil rolled his eyes at him, smiling, and returned to the bathroom with his clothes. Dan heard the hairdryer click on moments later.

Well, Dan mused, returning to his earlier train of thought. There’s no harm in asking. 

So when Phil returned, and turned off the lights, and laid next to Dan in the darkness, Dan turned over and kissed him. At first, the kiss was slow and tentative. Phil liked foreplay, possibly liked foreplay more than any actual event, and Dan didn’t want to surprise him into backing away. By beginning with light touches that bordered on a caress, like a siren, Dan slowly pulled Phil down into the thick of it with him. 

Once he knew Phil was on the same page, he picked up the pace. He swung his leg over Phil’s torso, straddling him as he deepened the kiss, and felt the cool air against his face when the contact forced a sharp inhale out of Phil. Dan had no patience to be subtle or waste anymore time. His intentions were clear in his kiss, which held no room for insincere chastity. 

In the tussle, Phil hands had found purchase on Dan’s body. One was at Dan’s upper arm, clutching awkwardly at the bony muscle underneath. The other was grasping the bend of Dan’s hip, and his fingers were kneading the scrunch of flesh that had formed there. 

Phil would kiss him like this for hours if Dan didn’t do something about it. 

He slowed their kisses, turning them languid as opposed to frantic, and pulled back just enough to speak.

“Can I blow you?” he whispered, forehead-to-forehead with Phil.

Phil pulled back suddenly, looking at Dan in surprise.

“What? Are you sure?”

To Dan, Phil looked disbelieving, but even in the dark shadows of the room, he could tell that his pupils had grown wide. 

“Yes,” Dan said, intentionally using a tone that attempted to sound sardonic, but ended up more defensive.

“Have you…” he trailed off, likely recalling Dan’s earlier hesitance to speak about his history, but then continued. “Have you done this before?” 

Dan rolled his eyes then.

“Yes, Phil, I’m not going to bite your penis off.”

Phil laughed, making a sound of disgust. 

“Argh! Don’t say penis!” He nudged Dan with his knee. “I just meant to say, like, ‘are you comfortable with this.’ I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything.”

This wasn’t the first time Dan had heard something like that, but it was the first time he actually believed it. Before, a check-in like this would have been hasty, thrown out at the last moment with a degree of insincerity laced in the question, like they were really hoping Dan would still acquiesce. But Phil was asking upfront. Dan’s wellbeing was his first concern, not a platitude thrown into the air when his pants were already off. 

Still, Dan didn’t hesitate. 

“I want to,” Dan said, firm in his tone. “If…you want to, I mean.”

Phil stared at him for a moment, breath still heavy. He opened his mouth for a moment before closing it again.

He nodded. “I…yeah.”

Dan couldn’t help it. He smiled. 

“Okay,” he said, then met Phil in the middle for another kiss. He inhaled through his nose, breathing in Phil’s scent and letting it swirl into his brain. For a moment, his hand cupped Phil’s jaw, and he could feel the remnants of overlooked scruff. This, too, ran circles around his head, a reminder that Phil was a man, a man with facial hair, and chest hair, and knobby knuckles, and a cock that he was about to put in his mouth.

Dan began trailing his mouth to those hairs on Phil’s jaw, then down further. At the same time, he used his hands to tug on Phil’s waistband.

“Can you—” he whispered, before Phil understood and lifted his hips to help slide his pants off. 

Well this was the moment, he supposed, settling between Phil’s legs. He nipped at the insides of Phil’s thighs, relishing in the jumpiness it produced. From above him, Phil laughed, but it sounded strained coming through his labored breathing. 

It was like all of the research he’d gone through the trouble of finding over the last few weeks disappeared, and he was left with what he was sure was going to be the sloppy instincts that had led him to this point.

Tentatively, Dan gathered saliva to pool on top of his tongue, then licked one long stripe from the tip to the base of Phil’s cock. 

Underneath him, Phil’s body tensed, his legs drawing up slightly. Phil released a strangled exhale.

Good, Dan thought, but he could do better. 

He wet his tongue again, then worked backwards, beginning at the base and licking up to the tip. Then he stopped, just at the underside of the head, and pressed a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss there.

Phil exhaled again, but this time it carried the trace of a whimper. His cock twitched slightly, and Dan let the tip fall back to his lips. From this angle, Dan watched as Phil’s hand clutched the thin fitted sheet beneath it. 

“Okay?” Dan asked with a grin.

“Yeah,” Phil eked out, not catching the tease behind the question. His eyes were screwed shut.

Dan huffed a laugh, wrapping a long-fingered hand around the base of Phil’s cock. It was still wet from his spit. 

“Is there anything in particular you like?” 

He was doing his absolute best not to sound like he needed assistance, but so many of those forums and websites had emphasized how important it was to find out what sorts of little details the other person enjoyed. Here was Dan, forced to find the balance between showing Phil he was a sex god and getting enough information from him to actually achieve that goal. 

“I’m…easy,” Phil breathed. “Just do whatever you usually like.”

Right. Dan pulled a face, knowing Phil still wasn’t looking at him. He wasn’t sure if Phil meant what he likes when he’s giving or when he’s receiving, but he was kind of fucked either way. By this point, guys would tend to take over and guide — well, grab him into what they wanted. Dan didn’t really have to do much in terms of making decisions or thinking about any kind of finesse. 

And, well. They had never really reciprocated when they were done. 

Dan shook off his uncertainty, hiding it behind a hum. He gave the base of Phil’s cock one or two light strokes with his hand, then enveloped the tip in his mouth.

He hummed again.

“Fuck,” Phil gasped, barely audible. His hips wiggled, but he didn’t thrust. If anything, it seemed like he was consciously trying to avoid it.

As Dan began a slow rhythm — using his thumb and middle finger to form a ring of extra pressure around his lips — he felt a bit alone on the water. This sort of treatment was, no doubt, highly preferable to the rough and frenzied motions he’d experienced before, but the total responsibility for the game at play was mildly overwhelming. 

If it weren’t for Phil’s body language, his gasping and grasping at the sheets, Dan wouldn’t really be sure that he was doing the right thing. But, given that very feedback, he was trying to trust himself, and trust Phil, that he hadn’t fucked anything up yet. 

The consistent bobbing was working well for him, at least, until he got overconfident. 

On one particular downstroke, he took in too much of Phil’s cock and gagged.

“Sorry! Sorry!” Phil was saying, sitting upright and reaching out to hold Dan’s face in his hands. The sudden movement was startling, more so than the gagging. “Are you okay?”

Dan huffed a laugh at him. 

“I’m fine,” he croaked. He placed a hand on Phil’s sternum and gently pushed him back. “Lay back down.”

He was more than fine, he thought, watching Phil trying to let himself relax again against the pillows. That had been exactly what he needed. That feeling of being overcome by his body, and by Phil’s body, turned his blood hot and lit something insatiable behind his eyes. 

This was the slutty feeling he’d been chasing. If he was honest with himself, he almost wanted it to happen again. 

“We can stop—”

“Shut up.”

This time, Dan concentrated on honing that feeling. He restarted his rhythm on Phil’s cock, relishing in the hissing and cursing coming from above him. He closed his eyes, focused on the feeling of being used, even more delicious now that it was Phil, someone he really liked, someone who really liked him, someone who was being so nice to him. He relaxed his throat, just a little bit, in the hopes of getting those extra few centimeters this time. 

He held it for a few seconds — the farthest amount he’d been able to take — then pulled off completely for a breath of air. 

“You’re so good at this,” Phil slurred. It sounded like he was trying to make light of how good he felt, but he really just sounded helpless. “Your — you — you feel so good.”

Dan took him back into his mouth and hummed. Phil was too coherent.

A scratchy, shuffling sound brought Dan’s attention back to the sheets that Phil kept grasping next to his hip. Sinking back into the slutty feeling that was making his mouth water, Dan grabbed Phil’s hand, plucked it from the bedsheets, and plopped it on top of his own head. 

Yes, that was it, he thought, feeling the goosebumps ripple across the back of his neck. The weight of Phil’s hand was just enough to send him careening back into the zone he loved so much, and he could feel his own cock throbbing and tenting the fabric of his pants. He wasn’t pushing — Dan was starting to think that Phil wasn’t going to make any movement that had a chance of making Dan uncomfortable — but gravity was pulling enough that he could pretend that he was pinned between Phil’s hand and his cock. 

It was such a heady feeling, and he hummed involuntarily when the fingers in his hair twitched, spreading across his scalp. 

Fuck, that was it. That was exactly it. 

As he started his rhythm again, he snuck a hand down his own pants, attempting to relieve some of that pressure and get himself off. He hummed around Phil’s cock at the touch, lost to the onslaught of sensation around him. 

That’s when he felt Phil’s foot nudge at his hip.

“Hey, stop it,” Phil said.

Dan startled, pulling off and up. 

“What? What’s wrong?”

Phil was looking at him fully for the first time in several minutes, and Dan noticed that looked freshly fucked. His hair was sticking in all sorts of directions, and when he spoke, he sounded strained, like his mind was still somewhere else.

“Stop touching,” he said, nodding down at Dan’s crotch. “You next.”

For a second, Dan didn’t really know what he was saying. Then the words caught up to him.

“Oh!” Then, “You sure?”

Phil was the one to break the pattern, shooting Dan a withering look.

“Okay, how about we agree that we’re sure about everything we say.”

Dan huffed a laugh, the heat of his sluttiness abating in favor of his normal dynamic with Phil. They were so similar sometimes that it ended up being a hindrance, like this. 

“Okay,” he laughed, then settled himself between Phil’s legs one more time. 

Phil placed his hand back on Dan’s hand, running his fingers through his hair. Dan’s eyes fluttered shut, and he relished in the feeling for a moment.

“You really like someone playing with your hair, don’t you?”

Dan smiled and hummed, keeping his eyes closed. Normally, he would be worried about his hair getting out of place, but if Phil had a problem with the way Dan looked after he’d been blowing him, Phil could deal with it.

“You know, I’ve been watching your videos,” Phil continued. “I keep getting distracted, though. You have such plush lips.”

At this, Phil used his thumb to trace Dan’s bottom lip, swollen from the use it’d been put through. He could only imagine what he looked like right now.

Dan was struck with a thought. 

“Watch me?” he asked, looking up at Phil.

Phil blinked. “While…?”

The implication was heavy. Dan smiled and nodded, leaving it at that. He’d been told before what he looked like while he was sucking cock. Some of the comments were crass and unnecessary, but he always liked when they talked about his eyes. That was usually the point where they were close, fistful of Dan’s hair and moaning about his big, round eyes looking up at them while he took their cock. 

Phil didn’t seem to be a huge fan of eye contact on an average day, and Dan was starting to realize that he didn’t relish in an opportunity to treat Dan as lesser than for his sexual interests, but after a moment, he nodded, tentative. 

“Okay.”

His own cock still heavy in his pants, Dan restarted his teasing. He lowered his head, not taking his eyes from Phil, although Phil had already broken the contact to look somewhere around Dan’s mouth. 

He pressed another kiss to the underside of the tip, then lapped at it with his tongue, then enveloped the head entirely. 

Phil’s expression crumpled and he let a gasp escape behind his lips.

“Jesus…”

His hand was back in Dan’s hair, but the grasp he had wasn’t painful. It was just enough. 

Dan moaned, his eyelids droopy but not closing, and picked up the pace.

Phil was having a hard time keeping to the terms of watch me, but Dan could tell he was trying his best with what he had to handle. As Dan’s rhythm increased, Phil’s body became restless, squirming and twitching underneath him. 

“Fuck…Dan–”

Dan moaned around his cock, and Phil threw his head back in a gasp before remembering the eye contact.

He looked down at Dan for a moment, a moment that Dan took to intentionally look as sultry and alluring as one could in the middle of a blowjob, before Phil grimaced and shook his head.

“I’m close– I can’t–”

Without glancing away, Dan raised his free hand and grazed a light touch against Phil’s balls. 

The effect was instantaneous, with Phil’s grip on his hair tightening to a delicious burn and his body making infinitesimal bucking motions beneath him. Dan could feel the warm cum land in the back of his mouth, and he continued his motions while trying to swallow what he could. 

“God…fuck…” Phil whimpered.

If Dan were in a different headspace, he might’ve been worried about being overheard by someone else in the house. But watching Phil orgasm after he’d been dreaming and researching and working for this very thing made him realize he didn’t all care that much. 

He liked the way Phil writhed under him when pleasure was wracking his body. In that moment, all of his attempts at research and all of his previous practices were worth it. This was the powerful feeling he liked. This was the moment when he felt like the world’s biggest slut, but one with the ability to take his new lover apart. 

Phil came down from the high way too soon, Dan thought as he pulled off. He was already back down to big, deep breaths and languid movements. His hands were brushing against Dan’s shoulders. 

“Here. Come here.”

Not sure what Phil really wanted, he rose, crawling back up Phil’s body, when Phil wrapped his arms around his back and pulled him down. 

“Oof!”

“That was so good…” Phil was mumbling. “‘S so good. Fuck…”

Dan chuckled into the crook of Phil’s neck, then buried his face in the scent of him. He could die here, he thought. He still felt a little dirty — sweat sticking between the two of them, hair rumpled, sore jaw — but knowing that Phil was so satisfied and pliant, and knowing Dan had made him that way, it was enough to make him the happiest he had been in a long time. 

He’d nearly forgotten about his own hard-on when Phil spoke. 

“Are you still…can I give you one?”

In the safety of his hiding spot, Dan’s eyes widened. He froze for a moment. 

“Don’t feel like you have to,” he said hesitantly. 

Without warning, Phil flicked the fleshy part of Dan’s ass, and he yelped. 

“Okay!” he conceded. “Okay, yes I want it.”

His heart was pounding now, more anxious than he was before, when he was giving. This would be completely uncharted territory for him. What if he embarrassed himself? What if it changed the way Phil thought of him, like something was wrong with his dick and it freaked him out and never wanted to see him again?

Phil moved underneath him, turning them both on their sides when Dan said:

“I, um—”

Phil looked at him, expression open. No, he deserved to know. This wasn’t some random guy. This was Phil. 

“I’ve never had, before, I mean— I’ve only given, I haven’t…”

He closed his eyes, too focused on what he was seeing and not what he needed to be saying. All of his bravado went out the window as soon as he spoke, and he was about to start openly cringing at himself for his awkward phrasing. 

Phil grabbed one of his hands, gently. Dan looked at him. 

“I’m not going to bite your penis off,” Phil murmured, smiling. “Promise.”

Dan smiled back. Phil always knew how to settle his nerves, even if Dan himself struggled to. 

Phil kissed him. He could probably taste himself on Dan, a thought that made Dan hesitant to return the kiss, but when Phil didn’t go anywhere, Dan gave in. This was really someone that liked him. This was a guy who actually wanted him around, even after sex. 

When Phil pushed him back to the mattress by his shoulders, Dan’s pulse increased. When Phil began to travel down his body, leaving little laps and licks on the way, Dan’s breathing became faster and lighter. 

“You’re so hard,” Phil mused, almost as if to himself. The warmth of his body and breath was driving Dan crazy. “Sorry I kept you waiting for so long.”

Dan was about to wave the comment away, insisting he enjoyed every moment regardless of how much attention his cock was getting, when Phil began to mouth at him overtop of his pants. 

Involuntarily, Dan let out an embarrassing noise, somewhere between a groan and a gasp. His hands flew to Phil’s hair, then, thinking better of it, placed them on his shoulders instead. 

“It’s okay,” Phil said, and the mixture of his hot breath and the vibrations of his voice felt electric against his cock. Phil grabbed one of Dan’s arms to bring his hand back to his head. “I like it too. Just don’t push.”

Phil continued his attentions as he wiggled Dan’s pants down below his waist, then, with one hand, brought Dan’s cock to his mouth and enveloped the tip. 

Dan made a sound like he’d been punched, and his whole body tensed. He could hear sounds bouncing off the walls of the room — his gasps and groans, the slightly wet noises beneath him — but they came to him as if he was underwater. 

Phil didn’t waste any time with teasing, and somewhere in the back of his head, Dan was immensely grateful. He’d been hard for what felt like forever, and this was the exact amount of attention and pressure he’d been looking for. 

“Phil,” he whined. God, he sounded pathetic, but he couldn’t care less. 

With his hand still resting on Phil’s head, he could feel Phil’s movements, up and down, and the thought of it went directly back to his dick. 

“Phil, please—”

Christ, it was so much warmer than he imagined, so much wetter. He had no idea this could feel so good. It was like his whole body was on fire and dunked under warm water at the same time. 

And it was Phil who was doing it. 

Fuck. 

“Phil I’m close, please— please please—”

Dan came, much faster than he’d anticipated, and he had just enough foresight to place both hands on the mattress. He gripped the sheets beneath him as hard as he could and used all of the remaining willpower in his body to keep from bucking his hips. He just hoped he had warned Phil in time to make an informed decision about where he wanted to be, because Dan definitely just came down his throat. 

He was making so many embarrassing noises. Whatever. 

Phil was still giving his cock attention when it became too much, and Dan began to nudge at his shoulders to push him away. 

“Okay…okay—”

Phil pulled off, climbing back up the bed with a grin. 

“Was that to your satisfaction?” he teased. 

“Oh my god,” Dan whispered in lieu of a response. 

Phil smiled, and to Dan’s horror, he noticed a little bit of his cum leftover at the corner of his mouth. 

“Oh, you have—”

He raised a hand to wipe it away himself, but before he could, Phil lapped it up with his tongue. He didn’t look away from Dan once. 

“Did I get it?”

Dan stared at him. 

“Are you real?”

Phil dissolved into giggles, nuzzling his forehead into Dan’s chest before sinking the rest of his body on top of him, as well. Dan wrapped his arms around him, a feeling as natural as breathing, and buried his nose in Phil’s freshly-washed hair. 

He relished in the moments of grounding stillness like this, moments that reminded him that Phil was real. Dan’s mind wouldn’t be able to conjure the feeling of him like this, not the details of muscle and bone and the warmth of them, or the smell of his shampoo mixed with the natural scent of his bedsheets. 

Phil was so real, and here he was, with Dan. 

“Don’t get too comfortable,” Phil mumbled into his chest. “We should probably brush our teeth again.”

Dan hummed. “You get up first.”

A few moments went by, and neither of them moved. Phil sighed. 

“Don’t wanna. Too tired.”

“Too—? Oh for goodness sake,” Dan muttered, then poked Phil where he knew he was ticklish. 

Phil yelped, squirming until he was on the other side of the mattress. 

“I hate you,” he mumbled. 

Dan laughed, stood, and ruffled Phil’s hair in the way Phil hated. 

“Come on buddy, let’s get the cum out of our teeth.”

Phil made a fake retching sound behind him, and Dan laughed all the way to the bathroom.