Chapter Text
Steve Harrington had the kind of confidence people had where they know they’ve won the lottery. Not the actual lottery - the one that matters more. The one that decides who gets the looks, who gets born to rich parents, who gets the ability to be a varsity athlete, who gets the charm. Steve Harrington had won the genetic lottery, and he knew it.
And yeah, sure, he didn’t get the intelligence. His grades would tell anyone that. And, well, yeah, his parents were assholes, who didn’t give a damn about their only son.
But life was all about trade offs, wasn’t it? Steve wasn’t stupid enough to think that anyone could have it all. He had enough. And more than enough to make him popular.
Right now, leaning on his precious Beamer after school, with Tommy and Carol and Nicole all arranged around him, Steve really felt popular. He knew he was. He was just that kind of guy. He was charming, good looking, girls were drawn to him. He didn’t even feel bad thinking it - that was just the way it was.
Nicole was laughing a little too loudly at his jokes, tossing her hair from her seat on his car engine. She wanted him, it was obvious to Steve. There was nothing wrong with Nicole, but Steve was completely infatuated with someone else. Nancy Wheeler - a sophomore.
Their relationship hadn’t gone much further than making out in the toilets before school started, and Steve climbing through her bedroom window to help her ‘study’, but still, she thrilled Steve. She was different to the girls he normally dated, though. Very much a good girl. Which wasn’t a problem, Steve could behave himself around her. But right now, with just his old friends, Steve didn’t have to behave.
And speaking of sophomores, another one was walking past Steve’s car. Jonathan Byers. He was an easy target for Tommy: poor family, not many friends, kind of a loner, a freak, somebody who never said anything back, just bowed his head lower and walked away.
Jonathan Byers was an easy target. And with his girlfriend watching, Tommy already felt under pressure to put on a good show.
“Well, look who it is!” he shouted, coming to a stop right in front of Byers, who just tried to walk around him. “Hey, don’t be rude, I’m talking to you.”
Steve would be expected to join in, of course, being the popular jerk that he was. And luckily for Steve, he’d noticed something. Byers had been holding a bit of paper that he’d hastily shoved into his pocket when Tommy stepped in his path. Whatever he’d been holding, it was obvious he hadn’t wanted them to see.
“What was that I saw you holding?” Steve asked lazily, moving over to join Tommy. He then quickly reached into Byers’ jacket pocket, grabbing the paper.
“Hey!” Byers said, grabbing Steve’s wrist with a surprisingly cold grip, but Tommy was quick to bat his arm away.
“Why so defensive?” he jeered.
“Give it back,” Byers said, almost desperately, unable to reach out because of the way Tommy was blocking him.
Steve looked down at the paper in his hand, and saw that it was in fact a letter.
“Jessica Barns,” he read aloud from the return address, “Woah, Byers, you got a girlfriend?” Byers glared at him as Carol and Nicole laughed from somewhere behind Steve.
“Open it, Steve,” Carol called, “Let’s see what pervy stuff the freak and his girl are into.”
Steve felt a twinge of guilt. Was that too far? Well, he was in too deep now. He turned the letter over in his hands.
“Wait, no, don’t,” Byers blurted out, actually sounding panicked now.
“Oh my god, what the hell is in there that’s got him all panicked?” Nicole laughed. “Come on, Steve.”
Steve ripped open the letter. Who sent letters anymore, anyway? He was honestly kind of curious as to what it might say now.
He unfolded the paper.
“To Jonathan Byers,” he read aloud, over the laughs of Nicole and Carol behind him. He continued to the next paragraph, squinting slightly to make out the messy handwriting, saying the words as he read them. “I’m sorry to inform you that your father has… died.”
Died.
Steve’s entire body went cold.
Oh fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
He had not just done that. He had not just been the one to tell Jonathan Byers that his dad had just fucking died.
Carol and Nicole had gone completely silent. Steve looked up, noticed that Tommy had backed away from Byers. Byers just stared at Steve, brow slightly furrowed, as though he couldn’t quite believe that Steve had just done that either.
“Why would you do that, Harrington?” Tommy suddenly said, looking at the surface, disgusted. But Steve could see the traces of humour in his eyes, could see that he was about to make this into some kind of joke.
And it was not the time.
“Dude, shut the hell up,” Steve said harshly, still completely shocked at what he had just done. Oh god, he was such a jerk.
Byers finally moved, tearing the letter and ripped envelope out of Steve’s unresisting hands.
He started to walk away. And, shit, fuck, he had just found out that his dad was dead! That envelope was sealed - Steve was the one to first open it.
“Jonathan, wait…” Steve said quietly, but the other guy completely ignored him, walking away with his head bowed low, looking at the crumpled paper in his hand.
“Dude, I can’t believe you did that,” Tommy said, and to Steve’s horror it looked like he was suppressing a laugh.
“What is wrong with you?” Steve demanded, stepping away.
“Chill out,” Tommy said, giving him an odd look. “He’s gone. It’s fine.”
“You know, Stevie, you delivered that news really well,” Carol teased, her and Nicole coming to join him and Tommy.
“Do none of you realise what actually just happened here?” Steve asked, genuinely shocked. “Why are you joking about this?”
“We’re not talking about the dead guy,” Carol pointed out, “We’re talking about you.”
“I can’t believe you did that,” Tommy said again, this time dissolving into laughter. Carol and Nicole joined in.
“Did you see his face?” Nicole cackled. Steve felt genuinely sick. He stepped away from his friends, looking over at where he could still see Jonathan, weaving his way around others students milling around.
Would other people hear about this? If Tommy and Carol thought it was funny, they were gonna spread this story around. Nancy was gonna hear. And she sure wouldn’t want to make out with Steve after she heard about that.
Steve had messed up really bad.
———
Steve Harrington wasn’t really the apologising type. However, when you accidentally read aloud a letter that reveals that someone’s father died, it warrants an apology.
He pulled his car into the Byers’ driveway and cut the engine. The lights were on in the house, so someone had to be home. Oh god, what if the door was answered by Jonathan’s mom or something? What was Steve meant to say to her? Christ, he didn’t feel emotionally prepared for this.
Maybe he shouldn’t be here. He was probably the last person Byers wanted to see right now. And Steve couldn’t blame him for that. But he had this weird sinking pit in his stomach. He’d had it before, whenever he and Tommy had gone too far, but he was usually able to push it down until it faded. This time, however, Steve had majorly fucked up, and the guilt wasn’t going to fade.
He realised he’d been sat in his car for far too long, and finally pushed the door open and got out. He felt slightly sick as he approached the front door. He hadn’t even thought about what he would say - he could hardly just say sorry and call it a day. But Steve wasn’t really one with words, and orchestrating anything more than a surface level apology was far above his abilities.
He knocked on the door, and tapped his foot impatiently as he waited for it to open. He suddenly had a surge of dread as he imagined Jonathan swinging it open, and the two of them being face to face. But surely that would be better than someone else answering. Like his newly widowed mom. Or… did Jonathan have any siblings? Steve had no idea.
What he was not expecting when the door was finally opened to be faced with Nancy’s little brother. What was his name again? Nancy had mentioned it a couple times, and Steve had seen the kid around, but his name had completely slipped Steve’s mind.
“What are you doing here?” the kid asked, hands on his hips, looking more fierce than any eleven-year-old should.
“What are you doing here?” Steve shot back, taken aback.
“Who is it, Mike?” another kid said, entering from another room, eyeing Steve suspiciously.
“My sister’s boyfriend,” Nancy’s brother - Mike - said. “What are you doing here?”
“Um.” Steve shifted his weight from side to side. “Is, uh, is Jonathan here?”
“No,” the second kid said, moving closer. As he did, Steve realised he slightly resembled. Right, so this kid was his brother. And Mike must be his friend, since they both looked the same age. “Are you one of his friends?”
Well, Steve could hardly answer that he and his friends sort of bullied Jonathan. And it seemed like the guy hadn’t told his brother or Mike what Steve had done to him earlier.
“Yeah, I guess,” Steve lied, “Uh, do you know where he is?”
“Yeah,” the second kid said. “He went-“
“Wait, Will,” Mike cut in, “Are you sure you should be telling…” He waved a hand over in Steve’s direction, raising his eyebrows. Wow, okay, Steve clearly hadn’t made a good impression on this kid, even though he hadn’t ever spoken to him before a couple minutes ago. That wasn’t going to make things any easier with Nancy.
“It’s okay,” Will said, “He said he’s Jonathan’s friend.” The kid was looking at Steve with eyes as trusting as Mike’s were hostile, and it was making the guilt in Steve’s stomach twist horribly.
“Jonathan went to our dad’s place. He said he wanted to go check on Jessica - that’s our dad’s girlfriend - but Jonathan doesn’t even like Jessica, so we think he’s actually gone to make sure our dad’s really dead.”
“Wait, what?”
The kid nodded sadly. “He’s faked it before. For legal reasons or money or something. Jonathan didn’t tell me much about it. I think he’s worried that our dad’s done it again.”
Jesus fucking Christ. The way this kid, this literal child, was talking about all this so casually was making Steve feel about ten times more sick.
And he’d had no idea about any of that. He hadn’t even known that Jonathan’s parents had split. Why would he?
But the fact that he’d gone to check that his dad hadn’t faked his own death - again! - just went to show how shitty this guy must be. And Steve had thought that his parents were bad.
What had Steve done? He thought he was just opening some guy’s letter from his girlfriend to make fun of him, but now he’d somehow become involved in something much darker. And Steve didn’t think he’d ever felt worse about himself.
But even if he knew the address, he knew it would be a bad idea to try and find where Jonathan had gone too. He’d have to save his apology for next time he saw the guy in school. Oh shit, Tommy and Carol. They’d never let Steve live it down if they saw him apologising to a freak in the year below. He’d have to try and do it when they weren’t around.
Mike was glaring daggers at Steve. “If you tell anyone…”
Steve was literally twice his height, but somehow he still felt threatened. “Yeah, of course not.” Tommy would have a field day if he caught wind of any of that tragic backstory.
“I should get going,” Steve said, backing away from the door and towards the safety of his car. Will gave him a halfhearted wave as he reached the vehicle, before Mike slammed the door.
And it was only then that Steve realised that Will hadn’t seemed sad at all about the supposed death of his father. Which maybe went to show just how shit of a father he really was.
———
Nancy wasn’t talking to Steve.
Tommy and Carol had spread the story of what had happened - making Steve seem like the only one in the wrong - around the school, and by the end of second period everyone had heard about it.
Jonathan Byers hadn’t been in, but Nancy had come up to Steve during their lunch break, by his locker where they usually met. She’d told him that she was disgusted by what he’d done, and that he needed to apologise. Steve had tried to explain that he had tried to apologise, but Nancy had just stalked off with her stuck up ginger friend. Honestly.
Steve had tried to call her that night, but her shitty little brother had picked up instead, and told Steve to get lost in language an eleven-year-old should not be using. As much as Steve was into Nancy, the whole situation was starting to feel a little high maintenance. He was King Steve Harrington, for god’s sake. He had the pick of any junior girl, and most senior girls too. Nicole had been flirting with him since September.
But despite everything, Steve was drawn to Nancy. She was different to other girl’s he’d dated. She was smart, sophisticated, surprisingly sarcastic. He couldn’t allow this stupid letter thing to ruin what he had with her.
Which is what Steve told himself was the only reason he was going to apolgise. Not the twisting guilt in his stomach, or the fact he’d hardly been able to sleep the past two nights. It’d been almost exactly two days since the incident, but Steve still felt awful.
Byers had been in school today - Steve had noticed him between third and fourth period, clutching his textbooks and determinedly ignoring the eyes following him as people gossiped about what had happened.
Steve was supposed to be at practice, but instead he was sat on the engine of his car. He’d deliberately parked close to the entrance of the school, so he’d be able to catch Byers as he walked out. Tommy was at practice, Carol had left with some of her cheerleading friends, and Steve had no idea where Nicole had gone. In fact, twenty minutes after the bell had rung, almost everyone had already left the school. The parking lot was almost completely empty, bar some freshman gathered right at the other end of it. Which meant, thankfully, there would be no one to witness Steve’s apology. If only Byers would hurry up.
Steve had just started to get restless - he was missing practice for this, for crying out loud - when the doors to the school finally opened, and Nancy and Jonathan came out together, talking quietly. Steve leapt up, stepping a little closer, waiting for the two to notice him. When they were a few feet away, they finally did, and they both stopped dead.
“Uh, hey,” Steve said, after a few seconds silence, completely losing the ability to form intelligent thoughts.
“Hey, Steve,” Nancy said slowly, glancing back at Jonathan, almost protectively. Steve felt a stab of jealousy.
“What do you want?” Byers suddenly said, after the silence had stretched a little longer.
Steve’s mind had frozen. Fuck, what should he say? He wasn’t good at this. He wasn’t used to apologising.
“I’m sorry,” he blurted out, “For, um, you know. That… that was a shitty thing to do.”
Nancy gave him a sort of awkward, half smile, but Byers still looked annoyed.
“…okay?”
Okay? What the hell did that mean?
“Okay,” Steve said back, feeling way more awkward. What else was he meant to say? Nancy and Jonathan were glancing at each other now, like they knew something that he didn’t. Steve felt the stab of jealously again. Nancy was supposed to be into him. She was supposed to be looking at him like that, not making him feel like the outsider.
“What do you want me to say?” Steve suddenly said, the words coming out harsher than he meant.
Jonathan just shrugged, then began to walk on, moving past Steve. “Uh, nothing,” he said. Nancy started to follow him. Steve could feel the situation slipping out of control. This was supposed to make him feel better! But somehow, impossibly, he felt even worse.
“Look, man, wait. I just… I messed up, okay?” Pause. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s… fine.”
“What?”
“You’re an asshole,” Byers said bluntly. “You know, I’d expect you to make fun of me. But to come to my fucking house? Talk to my brother? Spread the whole thing around the school? That’s a really shitty thing to do, even for you.”
Woah woah woah. “Hey, that wasn’t me spreading it around. That was Tommy and Carol.”
“Right, yeah, that’s better, then,” Byers scoffed, rolling his eyes.
“What is your problem, man?”
“What’s my problem?”
“Hey, let’s just…” Nancy looked between them almost desperately. “This is getting out of hand. Let’s just go.” She moved closer to Byers, and something in Steve just snapped. Nancy was supposed to be into him.
“I didn’t know you were such a slut,” Steve muttered. Nancy’s whole expression turned cold.
“What did you just say?”
“I mean, come on, Nancy. This,” Steve gestured vaguely between the two of them. “I wouldn’t have expected this from you.”
“Don’t talk to her like that,” Byers snapped, looking pissed now. The way he’d instantly jumped to defend Nancy seemed to prove whatever was going on between them. And come to think of it, Steve had seen Nancy talking to Byers before in school. He’d never thought much of it then, but now…
“What are you gonna do about it?” Steve challenged. Byers somehow looked even more angry. His hands were closing into fists, and for some reason Steve wanted to egg him on, see how far he could go.
And to think he’d been trying to apologise to the guy. He was King Steve of Hawkings High. He didn’t apologise. This was what he did.
“I never realised your father was such an asshole. I mean, he abandoned your family? Moved in with his girlfriend? What, your mom wasn’t good enough for him?”
“Steve!” Nancy gasped.
“How shitty does a guy have to be for you to think he faked his own death? Was that how desperate he was to get away from you?”
“At least I have one parent who cares about me,” Byers shot back, “That’s one more than you.”
Steve felt like he’d just been slapped. “What?”
“You always brag about having a big house, but it’s always empty, isn’t it? That’s why you always throw parties. Your parents just don’t give a shit about you, and don’t want to be around you.”
Oh no. No no no. He did not just…
Fuck him. Steve’s parents did care about him. They did. They…
Fuck. Fuck this guy.
“Jonathan, let’s just go, come on,” Nancy pleaded.
“Your whole family are failures,” Steve snapped, “Remind me how much your mom makes.”
“Fuck you.”
“And your father, I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised if you grew up to be just like-“
The force of the punch caught Steve off guard. He stumbled to the side, pain exploding across his face. He stared at Byers, shock fading, then lunged at him.
He got in a couple good hits before Byers got the upper hand. And, Christ, the guy could fight. Steve was older, and an athlete, but somehow Byers was landing more hits, shoving Steve down on the ground, each of his punches causing more pain. He was good, and try as he might, Steve couldn’t him off of him.
He could feel blood dripping over his face, hear Nancy shouting from close by, and other voices that might be those freshmen from the other side of the parking lot. Steve struggled, managed to land another punch.
Then suddenly Byers was being wrenched away. People had surrounded them, but Steve couldn’t make out much over the pounding in his head. Above him, the sky spun.