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This is fine. Really, it is.
Ed deserves some time with his friend, and Stede isn’t going to take that from him just because he’s feeling small. No matter how badly he wishes to be taken care of…
It’s rare this happens, even now that Stede has a better understanding of it. He’s still a caregiver at heart, he hasn’t slipped quite like this since…
It must have been that first time, mustn’t it? He’s felt the fog fall over his mind in little increments here and there, a softness to his thoughts as he falls asleep or a floaty feeling as Ed washes his hair, but it hasn’t happened in full since then, never enough to feel fully aware of it…
What little progress he’d made feels distant in the wake of not having Ed around to care for him, but… He can manage. For just a bit, surely. Jack won’t be here forever… Right?
He holds his plush bunny close. Vel makes things a little easier, at least. They’re comforting, and their ears are soft and nice to run between Stede’s fingers. They distract him just a bit.
Vel is no substitute for Ed though. Stede sighs, holding them a little tighter.
He’s curled up in bed, because as much as he’d love to be around Ed right now, he just… Can’t be. He can’t be around Jack, for one. In this state? He’d break down faster than he wants to admit. But more than that, Ed would sniff him out immediately, recognize what was going on far too easily and insist on taking care of Stede.
It’s different from last time. It’s not that Stede feels he isn’t deserving of it. But surely Ed spending time with his friend is more important? He can look after Stede some other time. It’s not that important, really.
With a sigh, he shuts his eyes. A nap sounds nice right now, if only because it’s all he can think to do that won’t make him just wish Ed were here instead. Maybe he’ll wake up and feel normal again…
Stede wakes to the sound of the door to his quarters opening. He’s always been a very light sleeper, after all. He hears footsteps, notable only a single pair, and for a brief moment he feels giddy that perhaps Ed has some free time to look after him now.
His giddiness fades as he sits up and is met only with gruff laughter.
Blinking the blurriness of sleep from his eyes, Stede is decidedly not giddy to be met by Jack, seeming incredibly amused. It takes a moment to realize Jack is laughing at him, with his plush bunny and his soft blue nightgown and his thumb between his lips. He pulls his thumb away, but he doesn’t dare let go of Vel.
“The hell is all this?” Jack spits out, delighted by the sight in the worst way possible, his amusement dripping with malice. Stede whimpers, which Jack only seems to delight in more.
And then, before Stede can properly brace himself, Jack lunges forward and grabs Vel.
“No!” Stede reaches out in an attempt to grab them back, but Jack pushes him back onto the bed.
“Relax, I’m just looking.” Jack holds Vel up by one of their ears. That’s not a good way to handle them at all… “Try to grab it again and your precious little toy might accidentally lose an arm.” Jack dangles the toy in front of Stede, as if daring him to grab them. But Stede knows if he tries to grab them, Jack will only tug back, and Stede really doesn’t want to think about Vel getting hurt…
“The fuck kinda pirate sleeps with a little toy and wears frilly little dresses and sucks their thumb?” Jack laughs.
“Please… Give them back…” Stede asks, voice small and quiet.
“Or what? You gonna cry for your mommy?”
Stede knows, he could call for Ed, but…
What if Ed sided with Jack? Even if he didn’t really agree, Stede knew he wouldn’t agree, what if he lied just to seem cool to Jack? He’d side with Jack and who knows what Jack would do to Vel and then he’d never see them again…
“Please…” Is all Stede manages, even quieter than before.
Jack smiles, a horrid, untrustworthy smile. “Nah. Might make good firing practice though, yeah?” Jack tosses Vel into the air before catching them again. “Oh yeah, definitely.”
The thought makes the tears that have been welling in Stede’s eyes finally fall. Vaguely, he hears footsteps approaching, and he’s not sure if he feels relived or terrified when Ed steps in.
“Jack! There ya are, I’ve been-” Ed freezes as he looks back and forth between Stede and Jack. “What’s goin’ on here exactly?”
“Oh nothin’, just havin’ a little fun is all.” Jack says, holding up Vel as if that’s an explanation.
“Not fun…” Stede says quietly, scrubbing at the tears on his cheeks.
Ed seems to catch on quickly, but he looks to Stede and gently questions him anyway, before he does anything drastic. “Stede,” He starts softly. “Did you give Vel to Jack?”
Stede shakes his head frantically, and Ed turns to Jack in an instant.
“Give me the bunny.” Ed says firmly.
“Oh, you can’t be serious. It’s just a fuckin’ toy! He’s a grown man, what does he need this for?”
“Jack. Give me. The bunny.” Ed repeats, sounding far more threatening than before. The tone must work, because Jack hands over Vel, feigning indifference.
“Whatever.” He says, like he wasn’t just at risk of being seriously maimed if he didn’t hand Vel over.
Ed takes Vel gently but swiftly, before Jack can even consider changing his mind, and strides over to Stede.
“Here you go, pumpkin. They’re okay, see?” Ed says as he hands Vel back to Stede. Stede grabs them immediately, clutching them as tight as he can, rocking back and forth as he holds them to his chest. “It’s alright, dove.”
“Ugh.” Jack makes a show of sounding disgusted. “What kind of pathetic captain needs to be coddled like a toddler by his boyfriend?”
The word pathetic rings in Stede’s ears, but before he can be too hurt by it, Ed is standing, striding back over to Jack. Stede’s pretty sure he sees Ed take his knife out.
Stede doesn’t hear any of what Ed whispers into Jack’s ear, and he knows that’s on purpose, that Ed doesn’t want Stede to hear any of the things he’s saying to Jack while he’s still small. Whatever it is though, Ed’s face looks intense, and Jack’s looks decidedly petrified.
Ed pulls away, knife in hand. “Got that?” He asks, now audible once more. Though Jack had clearly just looked absolutely horrified, he tries once more to play it off as if he’s the coolest person in the room.
“Whatever. Have fun playin’ dress up or some shit. I’m out.” Jack trudges away, making sure to slam the door on his way out. Once he’s gone, Ed turns back to Stede, gentle once more. He quickly moves to join Stede in bed.
Stede hiccups, trying not to cry anymore. He scrubs at his face some more, still rocking and holding Vel tightly as if he could somehow lose them again at any moment if he isn’t careful.
“C’mere hun. It’s okay.” Ed holds his arms open, and Stede crawls over to him and curls up against his chest in an instant. Ed wraps his arms around him, rocking him slowly.
“He’s gone now. He’s not comin’ back, ‘less he wants me to do somethin’ about it. You’re safe. And so is Velveteen.”
Stede lets out a sigh, tension starting to drain from him. His hold on Vel loosens just a bit.
“I’m sorry.” Ed says quietly. “If I had known he would treat you like that, I never-” He sighs. Stede doesn’t tell him it’s okay. It’s not, and he knows it doesn’t have to be.
“Not your fault.” He says instead, because that is true. Ed hadn’t known just how cruel Jack would be, there was no way for him to know.
“Next time,” Ed starts, running his hands through Stede’s hair, tousled from his nap. “Come get me when you’re feelin’ small, okay? I don’t want anything hurting you.”
Stede nods. It’ll be hard to ask to be taken care of when it seems Ed always has something better to do, but he’d rather risk that than deal with something like this ever again…
“Thank you.” Ed says, like he’s the one who should be grateful here. He presses a kiss to Stede’s forehead, and here wrapped up in Ed’s arms, Stede feels safe again.