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Daryl is so fucking sexy when he's writhing around below me. Every time I'm in him his moans drive me wild. His back arches. Mouth drops open gasping for breath. Letting word slip out like "yes" and "more" and "don't stop". Sayin' my name like he's praying to God. I've seen him come before I can even lay a hand on his cock just from me being inside of him, taking him and having him be mine in this basest most primal way. And how can I see all this and hear all this and not want to know what the fuss is all about?
I've wanted it for weeks but didn't want to ask until Daryl was more comfortable. Because I know no matter how uncomfortable or nervous he might be about the idea, he'll give me what I want.
It's my biggest problem about having a thing with Daryl Dixon. (Gotta call it "having a thing" for Axel's sake. - long story). Anyway- the problem with Daryl is he'd do anything for the person he loves. Anything. If I told him I wanted him to die his hair red and wear pink panties, I can guarantee you he'd be hitting a hair salon and a Victoria's Secret on the next supply run.
I'm the luckiest man on earth to have Daryl. And I'm glad I have him, cause if the wrong kind of person had him, they'd really take advantage. So once I decide Daryl is comfortable enough with sex now that I could ask, I still spend a few extra days fighting with myself about whether or not asking for it is taking advantage.
But then we had a week where we were doing it everywhere. In our cell, out hunting in a bed of scratchy pine needles, on a run at a discount mattress store, in one of the SUV's. And we were going non-stop multiple times a day. And I had to see him taking it and being in absolute ecstasy. And don't get me wrong- I was in ecstasy too. But just hearing him. His slow, deep groan as I push all the way in. The muscles in his arms tensing up as he grabs onto my hips. And the words he's leaking. "Fuck me, Rick," and "I need you inside me now!" And his head thrown back and his body moving with mine.
And finally I can't take not being taken. So I ask after we do it in our cell one night.
And he's laying there, gorgeous, as my hand brushes through his hair in a way I know he likes.
"Hey, Daryl," I say as casual as I can.
"Mmhm," he says still dazed from his orgasm.
"I wanna try it," I whisper.
"Try what?" He asks.
"I wanna feel what it's like to have you in me, bein' all yours. Like how you describe it. Let's do it that way next time." I say.
I'm trying to remember my CPR training cause I suddenly don't feel his pulse anymore as I'm laying against him.
"We don't have to," I say starting to brush it off like it was a stupid thought. "Stupid idea." And I try to laugh at it. But he hears in me that I want it for real.
"No, 's ok. We can do that." He says in his soft voice.
"You sure?" I ask.
He nods, and I know he's already deep in thought about how to do it.
"No pressure or anything," I say, "we can just see how it goes tomorrow night."
He nods again and I know I'll get it. He loves me and wants to give me things the same way I want to give him things.
Gave me a rock once cause it was blue like my eyes. No one ever gave me a rock before. Something picked out so personal and private just for me. Lori's gifts were always practical and given emotionless. Like giving me a watch that still had the price tag on the bottom of the box with a receipt afterwards in case I didn't like it. And she only gave it to me cause she had to since it was my birthday.
Wasn't my birthday for the blue rock. And he didn't just give it to me and walk away. He showed it to me close while we were laying in bed together. Turning it around in his hands and holding it up to my eyes to compare the color. He watched as I held it and turned it around in my hands and marveled at how soft and smooth it was. He grinned as I admired it.
I told him it was the most romantic gift I ever got. Which kind of killed that little romantic moment cause he went into laughing fits at me thinking a dirty rock was romantic. I love my blue rock and put it in my pocket everyday and when I'm not with Daryl cause I'm working in the garden or tending to other tasks, I can reach for it and rub on it and think about how much I love him. He probably thinks I threw it away.
All day I was getting excited to be Daryl's in a whole new way. I didn't see him at all that day. Just had my rock to rub between my thumb and forefinger and images of him in my head.
He didn't show for dinner. Carol said he was out at the fence helping Glenn. I'm sure. I feel guilty now for wanting it and asking for it because I know Daryl and I know he's been over thinking it all day. Probably putting poor Glenn through lord knows what kind of god-awful line of questioning.
But frankly, I'm kinda nervous and overthinking today too. Which is weird cause that's not like me at all. I'm the one with the experience, but in this case it's reversed. Daryl's the one that knows this. Knows what to expect and how it will feel and the thought of him guiding me and being gentle with me and taking my body like this is making me as hard as the blue rock in my pocket.
----
I hear his footsteps and for some reason I'm cramming nails into my mouth. Biting on several at once. Nervous.
As the privacy curtain parts he comes right to me. "Wha's a' matter?" He says all comforting. He pulls my hand away and brushes his fingers through my hair like I do for him when he's the one nervous.
"Just nervous," I tell him.
"You ain't never nervous. That's kinda my thing." He says smiling, "Sure ya wanna do it like this?"
I nod my head, "Definitely," I say, "just a little nervous is all."
He sits down beside me and looks at his thumb like he's thinking about biting on it. But he doesn't. He climbs the rest of the way onto the bed and leans over me kissing gentle. Hands in my hair. Taking the lead. He's done that before with kissing so he's comfortable right now and I'm comfortable.
He kisses me till our mouths are dry. Laying on top of me and up on his elbows with fingers still twisting in my curls he quietly says "'s gonna feel weird at first with fingers." His mouth is still so close to mine. So intimate a conversation. "And it'll hurt a little at first when I put myself in. Ya gotta relax once I'm in and it'll start ta feel a lot better." He sounds so fucking hot talking like this. I don't say anything because I'm just completely drunk in the sound of his voice. Low and instructive. Telling me how it's going to be.
He's kissing my neck. "I won't be offended if you needa stop me or change your mind, k?"
"Yah." I say and my voice sounds hoarse and foreign.
"Just talk to me ok? Tell me to slow down or stop or whatever you need," he says between nibbling on my neck.
When did he get so confident and comfortable?
"Are you nervous?" I ask. I don't want to be selfish. This is going to be new for us both. I don't want to forget about his feelings.
He stops what he's doing to my neck and locks blue eyes with me. "I was nervous all day. But not now."
He kisses my lips soft.
"How did you stop being nervous?" I whisper.
"With you now. I know you'll tell me nice if I do anything you don't like. And I want it. Want to show you what it's like and want to feel what you been feelin' of me."
He's right. It's just us. We're together. No need to be nervous or afraid. I'm here safe with Daryl and he's here safe with me and I'm put at ease just from knowing that he's at ease.
I pull off his shirt. He let's me do that now, though it took weeks of patience and understanding and encouragement. He helps me out of mine and we both fumble out of our jeans.
Daryl kisses down my body. Neck. Nipples. Stomach. Hip bone. He kisses the tip of my cock.
He situated himself between my legs and grabs the bottle of lube that always sits on the floor by our bed.
He coats two fingers while I'm watching and not sure what to do with my hands.
He looks at me, head cocked to the side. He doesn't say anything but I can read him. His pupils are blown and he wants this now just as bad as I do.
He pressed my knees out and back with the palms of his hands to get better access and pressed gently against my entrance massaging circles with his finger.
"Relax," he says with his soft voice. "Gonna put one in." And I feel him press inside. I feel myself tighten like my body's initial reaction is to expel something foreign that's invading me.
Daryl puts his other hand gently on my thigh and rubs and squeezes as he moves his finger slowly in and out. He takes my hand and lays it on my cock. "You can touch yourself while I'm getting you ready. Feels good." He tells me.
I keep my gaze on Daryl as he concentrates on what he's doing to me. Studying me. Looking up once in a while to check on me and each time I nod slow and he smiles.
"Two now, k?" He says and looks for my nod. His fingers work to spread me and I close my eyes and breath focusing on relaxing. I rub softly on my cock unconsciously as I'm feeling Daryl's touch in me. His fingers feel like they are dancing together in me, moving around each other, separating and then coming back close, bending and stretching.
And then he reaches the spot. Like a bundle of nerves deep inside that have never been touched but have been desperately waiting for it and I didn't even know. I gasp and my body convulsed like I just got zapped by paramedics with the paddles. I press back into him when his fingers disappear from the spot in me that I need him to touch.
"Jesus Christ, Daryl." I cry.
"It's good, right?" He says.
"Fuck. Yah. It's good," I pant. And I understand the desperation in his voice when he's begging me to fuck him, to get inside him. Cause now I need it.
"Ready for you now," I breathe. "Want you. Need you," I say.
He's over me, cock in his hand rubbing plenty of lube on and lining up to me.
"Now," I moan, growing impatient and needy and dizzy with want.
He pushed in slow. Slow. My heart is racing and my head is just spinning with urgency. "More," I gasp. And Daryl is right, there's some pain. But Jesus I want it. I want it so fucking bad. My hand is still on my cock and I stroke it as he presses all the way in, filling me with Daryl til I have all of him,
"'S fuckin' so tight, Rick. And hot." He whispers.
He thrusts in and out slow and careful and I feel him lift up on my hips a bit and he's pumping in and out faster hitting that spot. He knows just what to do and he's got me filled and under him and I'm his and he's taking me faster and I don't recognize the sounds coming out of my throat. His hands are tight on my hips. I'm stroking my cock and feeling him slam into this secret spot deep inside that belongs to Daryl now. He owns it. Owns me. Has me. And I call out his name cause I have so much to say but nothing comes out but an animalistic growl as I come hard over my stomach. And I feel him letting go inside me. And I feel his cock inside pulsing as he comes and he mumbles "Rick. Rick. Rick." with each twitch.
He pulls out slow and it feels strange to have him leaking out of me. And it feels empty with him suddenly missing from me.
We just laid next to each other coming down.
"I could do that again if ya ever want." Daryl said.