Work Text:
:¨·.·¨:
`·.. ♡⃗ Shinonome Ena ˎˊ˗
Ena fiddled with her dress, it wasn’t anything fancy, though most thought it should be. But it was unconventional, like her and Mizuki. Like their relationship.
She didn’t know how they had convinced her to marry them, she just remembered drinking with Rui, Airi, Mizuki and the others in one of the Tenma’s spare bedrooms and the next minute she was awake, their limbs tangled under the covers, naked bar a paper ring around her ring finger a similar one on theirs. They looked peaceful like this, truly, their head stuck in her neck, arms around her waist and holding her close to them as the snored blissfully, murmuring every so often.
She liked it like this, she liked being encased in their arm’s, yet she could only remember flashes of the night before as her head pounded.
She tried to escape their grip, but she couldn’t. They were holding onto her like a cage, they were always so scared she’d leave. That she’d run away. But she could never leave them, no, not her Mizuki. Not her Amia.
It got worse after they had a fun time, sometimes they never got over the fact they had to come clean about their secret. But she would’ve waited, Ena was patient when it came to those she loved (unless she was worried, that was a different story).
If Mizuki had told her to give them her heart so they could keep it wrapped in chains so tight it would kill her alive, she’d do it.
If they promised her they’d find peace if she walked away, she would in a heartbeat even if she would be in utter pain, she’d do it for them.
“Enanan?” they whined sleepily from beside her, moving around to find her hand, attempting to find her hand through her nails as they caressed it over and over. Rubbing their thumb over the back of her hand, smiling softly when touching the gems of her nails before trailing down to her ring finger and thumbing the paper and hot glue gun engagement ring. They smiled sleepily, gummily and goofily as they sidled up to Ena closer even if it was impossible both emotionally and physically.
“Yes, Amia,” she groaned trying to look at them and only see the mop of pink hair.
“Did we really get engaged last night?” they asked dreamily but Ena could hear the hesitation in their voice. She had known Amia far longer than she would like to admit, she knew them too well. They were always friends and then they became something mkre as the seasons changed and flowers of love bloomed in their hearts.
“Yeah, yeah we did,” Ena breathed out. If she were anything like those girls from those movies Airi adored, she would’ve giggled right now and smiled so wide she could crack the sky. But she didn’t, she just looked at Mizuki as they pulled away, a wide smile on their lips as they laughed looking at her, cupping her cheek delicately before their hand trailed down further.
“I-“ they smiled kissing her before pulling away, “Love,” and they did the whole rigmarole again, “You.”
And Ena melted, for someone so hesitant on saying ‘I love you’ to say it so freely now was something she adored, something she loved.
They existed in a grey zone, moving too fast and moving too slow. Marriage was too fast, but moving too slow in the intimacy, both physical and emotionally. But when Mizuki climbed on top of her and kissed her one last time, slowly, intensely and passionately. Ena could only smile into the kiss and reciprocate the feelings wholly, two becoming one in every sense of the word.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
“-You scared?” Akito asked, fixing his tuxedo beside her, combing her hair so it laid flat and he looked presentable. For as small as the wedding was (only ten or so guests in it’s entirety), Akito wanted to make his sisters day special. They may have fought a lot... A little bit too much, yet, he never wanted to ruin anything for her. He wanted it to be special, even if it meant Mizuki would be his in-law.
“No,” Ena replied coolly, but Akito could see through the act. Through the demeanour she portrayed as strong and powerful, she was terrified, she was twenty-four and about to get married.
Akito scoffed as he squeezed her shoulder, “You’ll be fine. The both of you.” He reassured in common Akito fashion, saying too much yet nothing at all.
“I know that,” Ena snapped as she looked to Akito in the mirror, they had changed so much. She had changed so much, for the better or for worse she didn’t know. But they were both the same Shinonome siblings. Apathetic Akito and enraged Ena. Two opposites yet so similar it was eerie and they would never change. Their childhood had solidified that, but they both still did care a lot admittedly.
“Look at us,” Ena stated, pulling at her long hair and looking at that one (hideous) bleached strand in his hair. It was different. Abnormal.
He hummed as she looked in the mirror before huffing and fixing his tuxedo collar adorned with one of Mizuki’s favourite flowers, foxgloves.
Ena was impartial on flowers, you could show her a dandelion and she’d believe it to be a sunflower. Show her a narcissus, and she’d find it to be bluebell. Flowers were beautiful but unimportant to her, but not to Mizuki.
Their accommodation was filled with fake plants, and real ones when Ena wanted to be that little bit more cliché and gift flowers.
A smile played at her lips as she remembered them, a day apart and she already wanted to race down that aisle and say ‘Fuck you’ to the priest and kiss them properly, claiming they were married at this point. She was addicted to them, bonded to them eternally and-
“Stop fussing over my suit, I have it under control,” Akito stated as Ena scoffed before slapping him hard on the chest.
“Your bow tie was crooked and your foxgloves were also crooked, god, how could your boyfriend let you walk around like this,” she argued with him, glaring up at him though it wasn’t a sharp glare. It was more weakened than normal.
“My boyfriend?” Akito asked shocked, a true hint of genuine emotion in his voice as Ena laughed.
“Yes, that Toya or whoever, the polite one.”
“He isn’t my boyfriend, he’s my partner-“
“Same thing, I mean, you always told me I was living in denial when Mizuki and I became partner’s for my project.”
“That was because you’ve known Mizuki since you were fifteen? Sixteen?”
“Sixteen.” Ena confirmed as she got lost in her own head, in her own mind.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena was sixteen, sixteen and young and dumb. Sixteen and an artist failure, she would never succeed. She knew that, she knew it, but she wanted too.
But it was fine, she was able to soothe her urge through posting to social media, the comments flooding as they said how pretty she was, how stylish she was. How amazing Ena was.
They never cared about her captions or her artwork, but they loved her. They loved her way of posing, the lighting and the way she would visit cat cafés, everything she did that wasn’t true to her they loved. Everyone was like that about Ena she presumed.
There was only one person who appreciated her artwork, Amia. They never posted their face or anything of the like, they posted their own artwork, design sketches and videos they had edited.
They were good. Talented though Ena was loathe to admit it, she hated admitting people were more talented than her. It was an admission she was weak and pathetic and everything her dad said she was and she never wanted to prove him right, she would rather swallow knives and have them tear out her throat than admit Shinonome Shinei was ever right about his untalented daughter.
Especially when Akito had the natural artistic talent, because of course he did. Of course Akito the jock had the natural artistic talent, not her the one who had the passion of the arts. Yet...
Never mind.
It would do her no good to be jealous of him, not right now. Not when he was struggling? She was unsure. They never spoke much and would never have a relationship when she proposed.
She felt her phone buzz, the likes pouring in but only one notification was different, it blasted her room loudly causing her to wince and silence it before anyone woke up.
God. Amia was a strange person, a colleague who wormed their way into Ena’s heart though she knew nothing much, in fact she knew nothing at all. All she knew was that they were a student, younger than her and preferred to go by Amia.
They were special she presumed, like Airi. The only other one to have a unique notification. “Yes, Amia?” she asked, her breath hushed as she heard Akito’s movement come to a halt in the hallway.
“Enanan!” they exclaimed, always so loud and excitable. Ena wondered how they were so cheery living in this world, in this hell whilst she was barely surviving and didn’t want to. But they still called her near enough daily with whatever smile they had gracing their face.
“Who else would it be?” Ena asked snappily as she sat at her desk and picked up her sketch book, twirling a pencil in her hand.
Amia always inspired her artistically, always pushed the boundaries and made her want to be better and to do better with it. Her art that was usually dead and devoid of emotion, that was static because it had to be had life again.
to their teacher in art school at least, though Ena found it to be a total fabrication.
“Your mum!”
Ena frowned and clicked her tongue, “this is why no one loves you.”
Amia laughed and it was a hearty laugh, a strong one. It was unrestrained, they were acting as if it wasn’t one in the morning and everyone normal was asleep. Only they were awake and a few other’s.
“But Enanan~~~ you love me don’t you~~” they teased softly, she could hear them tapping their desk, the nails giving a soft sound. “Otherwise, you wouldn’t call me at this time.”
Ena hummed in response. She didn’t outright deny it but she never confirmed it, Amia just gave her the attention and validation she needed. And was great for conversations as Airi was asleep and Akito and her never had a true conversation, only her asking for items qnd vice versa. Plus, he slept as he attended dsy school and not night school like her.
“You can’t even deny it, look at you Enanan~~” they taunted before all Ena heard was typing on a laptop fast and rapid, each key chosen with perfect precision. “Anyway, what do you think of the video so far?”
“I like it,” Ena replied coolly. “Though, I find the chorus too cluttered. It would work with the end but not the beginning nor middle, they are desperate but they hold onto some semblance of sanity.”
Mizuki hummed thoughtfully, “So, what do you suppose I do then?”
“Not too many effects, I like them, they fit the piece of music-“
“And your art,” they added on gleefully.
Ena frowned and rolled her eyes though they couldn’t see the action, she tapped the microphone with her pencil as they hissed. “My art is not that good,” she admitted quietly to which Amia sighed loudly into the microphone.
“Your art is phenomenal, it captures the pain the best,” Amia admitted, “Your flaws are a lack of versatility. Something I possess.”
Ena scoffed, “Stop pitying me.”
“I don’t pity you...” they hesitated as Ena felt anger rise up, her pride swelling immensely.
“What do you mean by that then?” She snapped, throwing one of her cheaper pencils across the room.
“I... I mean.... Nothing,” they sighed reluctantly. “Nevermind.”
“No. Not ‘never mind’. You, you, are being dishonest. Be truthful about my work, it isn’t hard or an impossible ask,” Ena countered, her temper fraying.
Amia sighed audibly, “Alright. Okay. I conceed.”
Ena hummed proudly though her hands began to sweat, her heart was pounding and she felt utterly sick to her stomach.
“Your art is good but, it lacks emotion. And when it has emotion its suffocating, too much at once, it drowns you in its pain, which is fine. I like it but its overwhelming, and your outfit design choices are very... questionable,” they rambled, their own anxiety getting to them as they tried to justify what they wanted to Ena. They liked her, a lot, and they didn’t want to offend her.
Ena hummed as she listened to their words, “Okay,” she agreed. She wasn’t satisfied, in fact she wasn’t near enough mentally prepared for the pain Amia had inflicted onto her. She never could be admittedly.
“How do you propose I improve?” Ena asked, trying to force a smile into a voice as Amia replied instantaneously, “I never thought you’d ask.”
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
“Jesus, I’ve known them for eight years,” she muttered to Akito thinking on it carefully.
“Eight years and dating for?” Akito asked, genuinely interested, checking his phone for a text from Toya most likely though it could An since she was their bestfriend.
“Three. Though, we did e-date for a year,” Ena muttered as she looked over Akito’s shoulder. “No text about when you’re walking me down the aisle?”
“None. Continue to prepare yourself or whatever,” he grumbled, waving her away as Ena fiddled with her lipstick and carefully reapplied it, making sure everything was perfect. Though, Mizuki would love her regardless she wanted to, no, needed to look good.
“You could at least care more. I’m your sister.”
“Yet, not my only one.”
“And it’s not like An is speaking to you after what happened with Kohane,” Ena pointed out fiddling with her necklace.
Akito winced as he flipped her off and Ena laughed, it was still a sore spot. An awkward response to how they would both be attending the wedding being their closest confidants.
“You say this like either ‘Yuki’ or ‘K’ are attending,” Akito retorted as Ena frowned.
“Low blow,” she stated as she thought into it.
Yuki and K.
Her colleagues and supposed friends.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
“Oh my God! Enanan. Enanan. ENANAN!” they squealed through Ena’s headphones, her head booming. She had only fallen asleep an hour ago and it was ten o’clock, she was absolutely shattered.
“What is it?”
“Did I wake you up? I’m sorry Enanan~~~” they pleaded on the call, Ena could only nod to herself as she felt her tongue was weighted by cotton.
“Its fine, you never call this early unless its important,” Ena justified, holding a blanket close to her as she tried not to fall asleep.
“I mean this could’ve waited and it can, you know, why don’t you go to sleep. It’s fine I should’ve-“
“You’ve woken me up already and wasted my precious time and ruined my beauty sleep,” Ena retorted, sitting up in her chair avoiding slumping into the blanket she was holding just under her chin, snuggling into the fluffiness of it. She just wanted to sleep but she couldn’t, not now with a restless Amia at least.
“It’s not like beauty sleep works for you-“
“Amia!” Ena screeched, her eyes pinging wide open as they giggled down the microphone. She wondered how the looked when they laughed so prettily.
“I’m kidding Enanan~~~ though, I do wonder if you’ll do a new post ‘just woke up. How do I look’ followed by some sort of emoji,” they teased whilst Ena grumbled.
“Is that what you ruined my sleep for? I was having the best dream, a world without you-“
“That sounds like a nightmare. Everyone should have a world with Amia in it, don’t you agree?”
“No, hence why it was ‘the best dream.’”
Amia huffed into the microphone, “and here I was about to tell you about our fan made music video and how we got a job but someone decided to be so rude to me.” They taunted sighing loudly, “what a shame.”
“You got us a what?” Ena asked, she was ignoring the dull throbbing of a headache from a lack of sleep and she no longer slouched. She was sat up straight, perfectly resting on the back of the chair as she leaned closer to her microphone and monitor seeing Amia’s icon flash on the screen.
“Well, it was a joint effort,” Amia continued before Ena heard a notification go, a little bubble appearing in their chat as she got off of their screen of just the cursive ‘A’ in a pastel circle to see a screenshot.
She heard Amia giggle as Ena read through it once, then again and then again, gasping the third time. “You’re lying? This has to be a shitty joke of yours.”
“Hey! I do not tell shitty jokes! You cannot understand my intellect, I am far superior to you,” they defended, their voice changing to an annoying teasing tone. She wanted to wipe whatever smirk they were likely adorning right off their face.
“But no, I’m not joking, that isn’t to see the dm isn’t a scam but. I really think its true Enanan. I mean it has to be. How couldn’t it be?” they rambled to themselves.
Ena scoffed as she realised that it could be false as they got lost in their own ideas. “It probably is, I doubt K would ever reach out to us with my horrible drawings and your amazing videography. It’s probably someone who was bored and decided to mess with two teenagers.”
“I don’t know...” Amia trailed off as they typed intently, “First the grammar and the likes was definitely that of a Japanese native. Theoretically, if I were a true sceptic, arguably someone who lived in Japan for a long enough time, but, it isn’t a foreigner playing a prank. It’s someone with a clear knowledge on Japanese and dialect and sentence structure. That is an obvious clue that shows this may be genuine. Secondly, ‘K’ used some slang in the speech indicating they at least live in Tokyo by being a native or a very good natural linguist-“
“And this is important because?”
“Because true K released a song called ‘From Tokyo’ among others such as ‘Tokyo 4am’. Plus, her only tweet dated from the fourteenth of march last year is her in Tokyo calling it ‘Home.’”
“Coincidental at most, maybe they’re a super fan like you and are playing an elaborate prank.”
“Can you let me finish? Because the more stop me the longer you’re away from your beauty sleep.”
Ena sighed, “Go on but this better be worth it.”
“Do you know how long I’ve resisted calling you about this?” Amia asked, “Very. I needed all the evidence to convince you to do this with me.”
“With you?”
“What if it’s a paedophile preying on young children?” Amia asked typing a way seriously making a humming whine with their words. “Would you really let me experience this alone Enanan?”
“You alone or two girls going down together? I’d much rather you alone,” Ena replied as she heard Amia whine before she sighed. “Though, if you have satisfactory evidence, I guess I could take the risk. But at the first sign of danger, I am leaving the call.”
She could hear Amia clap down the microphone, but it seemed they had moved away after the one time Ena had complained about it as they watched a movie through the call. They could be considerate if they tried.
“Anyway, back to my amazing-“
“Sub-par.”
“Amazing,” they gritted out, huffing loudly. “No judgements until the end.” Ena rolled her eyes but said nothing, leaving only a silence which Amia assumed meant they could continue to talk.
“Good, now where was I? Oh yeah, K seems like a Tokyo native and this messenger also seems like a Tokyo native. Furthermore, I think two years ago, K reached out to another fan artist similarly. The text is almost the same word for word but the first one seems slightly more casual, maybe more hesitant? Our one seems more professional.”
“Send me a screenshot of it,” Ena demanded as she picked up a maths textbook. If she was wasting her time, she ought to do something somewhat productive.
“I am, give me a minute,” they stated as Ena frowned.
“The technology magician needs a minute?”
“I cannot be perfect all the time Enanan.”
“You? Perfect? Be serious,” Ena retorted, “I was just pointing out for someone so adept with social media and algorithims, you taking your time with a screenshot is strange. It’s alarming. Are you doctoring it so I can join you?”
Amia laughed heartily, “That would’ve been easier and far more legal than what I’m currently doing. But no...” they trailed off typing intensely, “Here. Look at the highlighted details, such as the guest ID that is identical to the one who messaged us, the wording of some phrases were the exact same and we all assume this is K because after the artist posted it they were blocked and K released a cryptic song-“
“Let me guess, it was called ‘Everyone has a knife.’”
“No? I don’t think so at least? What makes you say that?” Amia asked, confused as Ena smiled to herself, tucking some of her hair behind her ear.
“Oh, it’s based off an English saying-“
“Oh. English. That’s my weak point in school,” Amia sighed.
“I thought you pass every class with flying marks?”
“I do, English is just a memorisation of the most common questions for a quiz and the answers and then you pray,” Amia reasoned. “I mean, I can do basic phrases naturally its just very... complicated with pronunciation. I can write it well... enough.”
“And yet, you don’t know one of the most common English sayings?”
“No... How do you know it?”
“My brother,” Ena justified, rubbing out her working out for the maths question, frustration growing. “He talks about it occasionally.”
Amia hummed as they continued to type, “Oh, the screenshot does match up enough too so its more plausible.” Ena added as she continued to figure out how to do this maths equation.
“I knew it would, it was too much of a coincidence especially since that was when they released their first song with Yuki as the lyricist.”
“Yuki?”
“Oh K’s friend? Look all you need to know is that she’s talented, very much a talented lyricist,” Amia explained briefly. “Her twitter account being yukl, the ‘i' is replaced with an ‘l’ and if I look through this account’s likes, they are all from Yuki bar some odd ones. Such as the only interview K and Yuki have do-“
“They’ve done an interview?” Ena asked, forgetting where she was up to in the equation. She was intrigued and invested now. Too far gone with the need of the knowledge of whether or not this was an elaborate prank.
“Only one. It was made into a video format, though I would find an article better since neither speak. It is just some guy reading out their answers,” Amia stated, “But well. You know Yuki is a Japanese name leading me to believe that whoever Yuki is, because lets be real its an alias, is Japanese first and foremost. Especially as in this article and I quote, Yuki says, ‘I love cherry blossom season a lot. It’s just as school finishes so to be surrounded by them especially in this abandoned school nearby to my city.’ Then there’s more talking this interviewer going on about the abandoned school and Yuki lets slip it’s one where a girl had so many expectations, she just buckled and killed herself-“
“What!?”
“Yeah, its a cool story and all-“
“Cool story?”
“Seriously Enanan, I thought you were a Tokyo native? This is a very common tale to tell children,” Amia scoffed. “Unless, you’re scared~~”
Ena guffawed, “Incredulous. My parent’s just... aren’t that into horror and the supernatural.”
Amia giggled to themselves, “Sure they aren’t Enanan~~. I’ll believe you... for now.”
“Back to this interview, this tale as I stated is known to every Tokyo native meaning Yuki has to be Japanese.”
“Just because she’s Japanese doesn’t mean K is.”
“It does as K also stated she doesn’t know English and only knows Japanese-“
“And you didn’t begin with this?”
“No. My other evidence was satisfactory enough-“
“It really wasn’t.”
“Just-“
“Fine. Fine,” Ena huffed. “Do you have any more evidence?”
“That I do, but you promise not to get me in trouble. Right Enanan?”
“It depends.... What is it about?”
“Well~~ since we both know K is real, at least this account is. The IP address and everything else useful is linked to a flat in Tokyo, as I suggested, and the flat is owned by a famous musician who has a daughter called Yoisake Kanade. Her age, allegedly, works out to be the estimated age of K now based off of how old she was in that interview.”
“I’m sorry, did you just doxx someone?”
“I didn’t leak their address.”
“Amia! That isn’t okay!”
“Okay, but now there’s a slim chance its a pedophile so we should so do it-“
“No, we shouldn’t. Amia what the actual fuck! HAVE YOU DOXXED ME?”
“Not intentionally, I just know the cafés you’ve been to but that’s none of my business,” Amia defended as Ena sighed.
“I can’t believe you know how to doxx people,” Ena sighed, rubbing her head as the excitement of K’s praise wore off and Mizuki doxxing K was stressing her out. “I’m going to sleep. And we are never mentioning this again because when you get arrested, I’m not going down with you.”
“But Enanan~~~”
“The less I know, the better I’ll be. Good night Amia.”
“Good morning Enanan~~” they replied, though it seemed a little more flat than normal. But Ena snorted anyway, a way to let them know she wasn’t mad truly, but she was a little upset. And tired. Very tired.
✩⡱
Ena was nervous, she has fallen asleep after that fiasco (somehow) but she hadn’t slept. She was dreaming but not really, any small noise awoke her before she began resting again as her heart hammered. She was terrified, for multiple reasons.
The first was the potential that Amia and all their doxxing proved to be true, the second was the fact someone needed her artwork. That was a terrifying prospect especially as she was a failure to everyone around her, her dad, her art teachers, those stuck up men that she would have to attend dinners of occasionally. She had failed all of them. She saw how tense Akito’s smile grew as she displayed a new piece, how her mum sighed with how much money she had spent and her father no longer looked at her, he much preferred to pretend she was dead. And she- reluctantly- agreed with him, Ena was so much betted dead but she was also petty.
That pettiness meant she wouldn’t prove him right, she wouldn’t let him know he had given birth to a failure. So, in her dazed stupor, she created a pro and con list about this call with ‘K’ and ‘Yuki’. She weighed out her options and she had more pros than cons (though they were half assed) and that was that. She had decided then and there that she would do it, no questions asked and with a clear mind.
Something Amia did not share her sentiment on.
It seemed, when they were nervous, they had two modes. Complete and utter excitement where they constantly needed to talk, never once stopping for a breath until their monologue ended and they had to take in air. Or they were quiet, hesitant and an over thinker. Stopping every ten or so words to formulate their next sentence without considering how it seemed to others.
“Amia, can you shut up?” She groaned in frustration. “We will be fine, let’s just do this with a clear and empty mind.”
“Enanan, this is K we’re talking about, I’ve been a fan of hers for so long I’m really scared. Because, God, imagine if she really did love my videography work. That is absolutely insane. I need it to go really well, she’s like.... my idol,” Amia justified, the worlds slurring together with the speed of their speech as she heard them play on their table rhythmically. One hand then the other then two slaps on the table followed by a pause and then repeat. One hand then the-
“You’ll be fine, you have me,” Ena stated trying to instill confidence in Amia.
It was times like these when she realised they were younger than her. When she had to act older and mature. But that led to all the hairs on her arms sticking up as, when it came to Amia, soothing their fears was easy, she knew what to say. But, if you asked her about her actual brother, she would stumble and hesitate and only make the situation worse and their relationship was bad enough already. If he were wandering the halls and was able to listen through the thin walls, it would become irreparable.
“Look, Amia, K wants you for your talent. That is an undisputed fact that you possess one,” Ena tried, her tongue burning as she was forced to acknowledge she was working with someone far superior to her. Someone who had natural talent, not a forced talent. Her heart clenched but she didn’t stop, she ignored the fire on her tongue.
“And you’re great with people, you’ll be fine. And, as I said, you have me. We can do it together, so stop moping or whatever and get a grip of yourself. There’s nothing to fear.”
Amia sighed loudly, “I guess you’re right-“
“I’m always right,” Ena replied haughtily as she checked her clock. “Shit, its like 5 to one. Do you think...?”
“Yeah, yeah, we should. Better to be early than late I always say,” Amia laughed though it seemed forced, their nerves seemingly getting the best of them to which Ena could only sigh and leave the call. If Amia wasn’t listening, who was she to try and help, though she wanted to. Somehow, she wanted to reach through the screen and help them, but she couldn’t so she looked at her nightcord screen and joined the call.
Her heart was hammering as Amia’s icon appeared, a familiar face. Then, an icon appeared that was a beautiful purple with a snowflake on it attached with the name ‘Yuki.’ This prompted Amia to message her privately with a string of gloating kaomojis, how they were able to make them gleeful and gloating non verbal responses Ena didn’t know, but they managed it.
“Ah, good evening,” Yuki spoke, her voice was very forced. Very high pitched and kind. “It is a pleasure to meet you Amia and Enanan.”
“Good evening Yuki,” Amia responded, their words very rushed. “I’m Amia.”
“And I’m Enanan,” Ena continued, her voice nearly shaking at the severity of Amia’s voice. The deep, low timber of it. She had heard that before, before it became the voice she knew but she must’ve forgotten it.
“It is a pleasure to be working with talented individuals,” Yuki continued. “And I’m glad you two are early, it always makes for a great impression.”
Ena frowned but said nothing as Mizuki tried to laugh, “I see, I’m glad you like that about us Yuki.”
“Of course, I’m very glad to work alongside the both of you and so is K.”
Ena nodded along, “Yuki. Erm. Do you know where K is?”
“K will be here shortly, she rarely is ever earlier to our calls,” Yuki replied as she began to hum a song under her breath.
“Oh, thank you, I just wanted to ask her something.”
“You could always ask me,” Yuki offered.
“It’s something more reserved for K-“
“Uh, I’m sorry I’m late Enanan, Amia and Yuki. I has gotten a little distracted in this one piece of work, my deepest apologies,” A soft spoken voice stated as Ena looked to the call screen to see three icons. The most recent addition was a basic nightcord icon but in a beautiful red colour, it almost seemed pink.
“It’s alright K,” Yuki comforted. “We all got here early.”
“That’s right,” Amia jumped in, their voice still not as lively as it was. The words seeming rehearsed. “We were just eager to make a good impression so we joined a little early. I apologise if that made you panic.”
“It’s... okay.... Amia? It’s fine,” K attempted to reassure. “Enanan, you said you had a question for me?”
Ena gulped, “Ah, yes. I was wondering...” she trailed off feeling her hands shake, she could do it. She had to but she couldn’t. It was part of the reason she wanted to believe it was a fake message to Amia earlier, the more she could deny it the more she could accept her art was abysmal with someone who she admired complimenting her.... Well, her chest felt tight.
“I was, erm, wondering if you had possible made a mistake in what you told Amia,” Ena continued, her voice shaking.
“What did I tell Amia?”
“About my artwork and how it is good. I was wondering if you were lying.”
Ena paused as silence fell over the group, her heart was beating so fast she thought it was going to explode and she was going to die. It was awkward, she could feel the tension and she hated it because why was K hesitating. Why oh why oh why-
“I found it good. I found that your art had a talent to capture my songs,” K stated simply. “I need your artwork.”
It wasn’t a false comfort. It was direct and somehow, Ena liked that, she liked the way it eased the pain in her heart and made her blush.
“I agree with K, your artwork captures emotion very well, you draw with emotion and not a purpose,” Yuki added. “Other people, other creatives do their art for a purpose and ignore the emotions. You don’t. Its very admirable.”
Ena paused, pondered over the words before smiling, “Thank you.”
“No, thank you,” K countered. “Yuki and I have seen many fan made music videos, but none of them capture what we wanted. You two, however, did. You understood our songs on a deeper meaning, you didn’t gloss over the story in them. It was very intense.”
“I would like to thank you both very much,” Yuki added, her voice never wavering. “Our song has reached more people and there are more views and comments than ever. We’re very grateful to you both for this opportunity to reach more people in this world.”
“We can’t take all the credit,” Ena rushed to say, she felt a guilty feeling somewhere in her chest. “It was because the song was good and can resonate with many people, or so I assume.”
“But, I’m glad we were able to help,” Amia added slowly. Hesitantly.
“You two helped me realise I want my music to resch many people and many hearts, if we combine our talents, we can do so. I would like to work alongside you both now, hence why I contacted Amia. I didn’t have any social media to contact Enanan, but I’m glad you received the message.” K continued, “To do so, I would like for you to listen to this demo of what I hope to be the next song. It’s unfinished but I hope together we can finish it to reach the heart of someone out there.”
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
“Hello? Earth to Ena?” Akito asked, wafting his hand across her face as she looked up to him. Ripped out of her thoughts that were slowly becoming bitter since K and Yuki were unable to be there for the two of them, but she still valued them both. A lot.
“What do you want?” Ena countered.
“Nothing. You were just a little too quiet,” Akito stated. “You’re never this quiet, you’re either laughing too obnoxiously or screeching your heart out, damaging your lungs.”
“I do not damage my lungs, unlike you, I have a natural musical talent.”
“And I have the natural artistic talent should you want to go there.”
Ena scoffed before she picked up some sweets in a bowl beside her and launched them at Akito. “Go to hell.”
“You first.”
“Trust me, I will make my way to heaven just to make sure I don’t have to spend eternity in the same place as you,” Ena hissed, playing with one of the bows on her dress. “Now, leave me to think.”
“You and thinking? That’s a terrible idea.”
“For once, it isn’t negative, I’m just thinking about me and Mizuki-“
“And that isn’t negative?”
“Not all the time, no. Sometimes yes but that’s to be expected in any form of relationship, whether it be platonic or romantic. And most of the time, though they annoyed me, it was never negative. It truly was my highlight.”
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
It was only her and Amia today. Yuki was revising for exams as she was a gifted student and needed to keep her prestige whilst K was missing and withdrawn rhe whole day. She claimed it was a very ‘personal’ day for her which led to only her and Amia doing work this evening.
She ought to have left, but, she didn’t need the other two for her art. She needed Amia the most, the other two were secondary because she just had to make sure they were all sharing the same vision, but Amia and her had to have the exact same idea. It could not have a slight variation in the slightest otherwise the music video would be messy, or worse, delayed.
“Have you checked your messages Enanan?” Amia asked, their voice was no longer that deadpan voice it had been in the recent weeks. They seemed less hesitant to ask for anything and more confident, especially with her.
“Give me a minute, I’m working with clay right now,” Ena justified. They wanted to try a new medium for the music video especially since it was one of Ena’s art school projects to do something with clay work.
“Ah, okay, take all the time you need,” they reassured.
“Don’t worry, I am,” Ena retorted as she heard them moving around their room. They had grown more confident to just let the audio be from their natural speakers instead of their headphones.
“What are you doing?” Ena asked, she was confident in this piece. She was proud of what she was able to create the day prior and the day before that so she just felt the urge to talk, to keep something alive between her and Amia. Especially because she liked their voice.
“Sewing,” they replied simply. “I have nothing better to do whilst you become the next pottery master, so I might as well as create new clothes.”
“You make outfits?”
“Yes. Do you not remember how we met? Do you not know my social media account?” They pouted as Ena laughed.
“How could I forget?” Ena remarked with a hint of bitterness in her tone as she smoothed down the cracks on the clay. “I was just trying to enjoy my day out and then someone decided to be rude-“
“I wasn’t rude. It was constructive criticism, your outfits in your artwork were impossible,” Amia defended. “And they were ill suited for you art.”
Ena rolled her eyes though the comments hurt. They really stung but, she knew they were right about it. They had an eye for fashion like her, but they had the better eye as Ena could never capture what she wanted. Whether that was an asymmetrical dress wirh a certain hem line or a ball gown that was big and grand but she had no clue how.
Amia helped with that.
“It was still rude and then you commented on my next selfie I had posted as if you hadn’t just wounded me!” Ena retorted as Amia laughed a beautiful laugh. God. She wanted them to laugh like that forever so she could capture it and keep it close to her, keep it sacred to her.
“It’s not my fault I found a pretty girl and I wanted to point that out,” Amia huffed as Ena blushed.
“I- There were still- You- You could’ve-“
“Are you shy?” Amia asked, giddiness in their voice. Their sewing machine had stopped as they seemingly got closer to their speaker, “Is my Enanan shy at a little compliment? A mere observation of her undisputed beauty?”
“Shut- SHUT UP!” Ena yelled causing Akito to groan through the walls as he stumbled awake. She took a deep breath in before simmering down her temper as Akito lingered outside her door. “What do you mean by your Enanan? I’m my own person Amia.”
They giggled, “I know that but... you’re my Enanan!”
“You’re unbelievable and utterly rude why-“
“Ena!” Akito yelled, hammering at the door. “Are you okay? Alive?”
“Yes! Go away!” she yelled back, as Akito jiggled the lock on the door. “Akito!”
“What?” he asked, standing in her room as she heard the sound of Amia leaving the call. Probably to give her privacy as they often did whenever family was involved, too much knowledge for online strangers was dangerous.
“Get out!”
“Not when you’re making a racket and waking the whole house up, frustrated with your recent art project.”
“No actually, I was talking with a friend,” she huffed, scoring the clay carefully with a scalpel. “Now can you go so I continue this conversation.”
“Airi probably wouldn’t mind me being here,” Akito continued as he walked into her room and sat on her messy bed. “Dad was looking for you earlier.”
“Whatever Shinei wants is of no concern to me,” Ena replied as she stood up, rubbing her hands on her apron. Sweat forming on her brows as she looked to Akito, half asleep and barely looking at her.
“What’s up with you?” she asked, looking to him as he moved back on the bed, laying on her pillows. “Are you fucking serious? Shinonome Akito get your ass out of my bed.”
She pulled his arm as he held a teddy close to him, one gifted by his partner a good man that Ena liked. He improved Akito as much as Akito improved him. “Get the fuck up? I need to do my work.”
He scoffed, head into the pillow, “You and working? As if.”
She rolled her eyes as she picked up a new pillow and launched it at him. He groaned slightly, opening his eyes to glare at her before going to sleep. “You’re an asshole, you know that?” Ena stated, grabbing her headset and sitting at her desk as she was responding to Amia’s frantic messages.
Amia:
hellooooo
enanan?
you okay?
enanan~~~~
Enanan:
i’m sorry
my brother’s here
i’ll be back in a minute
promise
Amia: okay
＼( ≧▽≦) ／
Ena frowned as she logged onto nightcord, making sure she wasn’t too loud. “Hey, sorry about earlier. I woke up my brother and now he’s in here so I can’t be too loud.”
“Awww, I can’t tease my Enanan anymore,” they pouted as Ena flushed red. She wanted to punch her monitor every time they spoke, but she did truly enjoy their time and attention and their banter. Though they greatly annoyed her, Ena couldn’t remember a time without them.
“You can, just don’t make me yell by doing something so shameless.”
“Me? Shameless? That is defamation, I’d never dream of it Enanan,” they stated to which Ena scoffed as she read through their messages.
“It’s not really a dream when its reality,” Ena countered as she looked through every image carefully, typing up a response to each one.
“To you at least,” Amia mumbled as Ena blinked, believing she had misheard them before she heard their laughter once more. “Thanks for the corrections by the way, I did think that the bridge was a bit too messy.”
“I mean, I get that Yuki sounds emotional as she sings, and so do you. But that takes away from the beauty of your vocals and the song,” Ena justified.
“My vocals aren’t good with this part.”
“Amia, you’re the only person to be able to sing, ‘katamichi bun no rou wo motte. Kesanai you ni hisshi ni natte, wazuka terashita issunsaki no, anaboko wa dare ga ochita ato?’” Ena sang missing the way Akito twinged under the cover as she rested her chin on her hand waiting to hear Amia.
“What if I let K down?” they asked, unsure, hesitant and scared.
“You could never let K down,” Ena reassured. “But, if you’re really scared and could ruin my chance at stardom. Well, then, lets do this together. Run over it with me.”
“Really? But didn’t you wake your family up?”
“Exactly, they’re already awake so lets do it now,” Ena encouraged going to find the instrumental and lyrics. Her heart beating as she read the lyrics and remembered Yuki’s rough version.
And so, that was what they did until the sun came up with Akito still asleep in her bed. She didn’t even remember he was there nor see the odd expression on his face because Shinonome Ena sang and made memories with Amia. Her closest friend.
｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡
ﾟ。 Akiyama Mizuki
ﾟ･｡･ﾟ
Mizuki was nervous, very nervous as they fixed their dress, their hands sweating immensely as they sat with An and Rui their best friends.
Since mizuena (as everyone called them) were unconventional, they said fuck having bridesmaids and the likes and just had their best friends by their sides. Airi and Akito for Ena, An and Rui for Mizuki.
“I can’t believe you’re getting married,” Rui stated, knocking back a shot of whiskey as he fiddled with his bow tie. An laughed to herself as Mizuki paced the room not even giving Rui a reply.
“I mean, I can,” An replied, looking up from her phone and her heart felt messages to Kohane. “Do you remember what they were like about her in high-school?”
“I wasn’t that bad, at least I wasn’t like you with Kohane,” Mizuki retorted before they walked to the vanity in the room and looked in the mirror, playing with their hair. It was long and no longer in a ponytail like it was when they were younger, and in university as Ena loved to play with their hair, she loved to be able to twist it and play with the strands as she buried her face into their back.
“I wasn’t that bad-“
“You were,” Rui and Mizuki stated at the same time as An looked away, a red dusting on her cheek.
“Are you excited? Nervous?” Rui asked Mizuki as they began to reapply their makeup.
“Both with an unhealthy dosage of wanting to die because fuck, have you seen my future wife?”
“Yes, trust me, I’ve met her multiple times,” Rui scoffed. “I was there when you first realised you liked her and then cried about it for a week because you went through many existential crisis’.”
Mizuki flushed red and nearly dropped their lipstick as they became very embarrassed.
Good Lord. They had forgotten about that.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Mizuki was sixteen and in their first year of high-school and they were rarely there. Today was the one day where they had to attend after being hammered with calls from their teacher and An.
They didn’t want to be there. Not with the way everyone stared as they hoped the cardigan covered everything up enough, hoped that the makeup they applied to their neck worked well enough.
Everyone was so judgemental now a days.
Especially when it came to them and their teachers offered no comfort, telling them to suck it up and deal with it. They didn’t want to deal with it, they didn’t want to be judged for who they were. It made everything so much worse.
That was why they were alone on the rooftop, bread in hand and phone in the other as they looked through nightcord. No one was active, as normal.
They didn’t know why they expected different, maybe it was because they hoped someone sensed their sadness and reached out but everyone was preoccupied with their own lives. Their lives that seeped into their music such as Yuki and her struggles with her mother and everyone’s expectations. Enanan and her need to succeed, the way she would claw her way to the top to succeed, destroying everyone in her path. Then K with her guilt and need to save someone, Mizuki’s life hadn’t leaked over into the music. They let everyone take centre stage since no one could resonate with someone like them.
They closed their eyes, the sounds of the bird were nice overhead as they just lost themselves up there. There they were nothing, there they truly didn’t matter. They were nothing but a piece of dirt staining this beautiful picture, it felt nice to be insignificant.
They jumped when someone walked up onto the roof top, the door swinging open as they ran to escape from the pressures below.
They turned to look at the person, purple hair with a blue streak and a cocky, teasing grin.
Mizuki was about to cry.
“Rui!” they exclaimed, wanting to get up and hug him but they kept their distance. They didn’t want to taint him they supposed.
“Aya, Mizuki,” he smiled, sitting across from them as they picked their knees up and brought their legs close to them.
“How are you?” They asked, ignoring the look of concern from him as they looked at their phone. A notification from Enanan appearing causing a soft smile on their face.
“I’m good, hehe, just hiding from some teachers,” Rui explained as they could hear teachers yelling to one another asking for a Kamishiro.
Mizuki rolled their eyes as they began to type to Enanan, “You never change do you Rui?”
“I have actually, I’m no longer alone anymore.”
Mizuki hummed, “I’m glad.”
“Yeah... What about you? How are you? You look different, more like yourself.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“You know exactly what I mean.”
Mizuki turned off their phone and looked to Rui. “Okay, maybe I do look more like myself but that’s not a good thing. Its a hard thing to keep to myself, but some people figure it out and, well, I don’t go to school.”
“Those people are bastards then. I should do a show with them with some pyrotechnics-“
“No. Just leave it. I just don’t want everyone to know about it.”
“Why?” Rui asked, excited at the idea as Mizuo8 tried hiding their phone.
“Nothing. I just don’t want everyone to know, especially because there could be people I know online here and if we happen to meet up. Well, I don’t want to ruin their idea of their good friend especially.... Nevermind.”
“Especially who? You can tell me you know? What are they like? Are they a good friend or a good friend?”
“There’s a difference?”
“Yes. One is something more, the other is strictly platonic,” Rui explained as Mizuki frowned.
“She- I- We. She’s a good friend... platonically,” Mizuki justified. “Besides how could I ever like her, I’m straight?”
“You seem a bit unsure of that one.”
“Well, I liked you but. I don’t know, I might just be confusing platonic feelings for romantic feelings because Enanan was there when I was struggling.”
“Like trauma bonding?”
“Except we don’t know each other’s trauma? Yeah. But- I don’t know, I don’t think I do. I just find her charming, fun to tease and utterly beautiful. I mean, it could be because I want to be her instead of being with her.”
Rui scoffed and flicked a rock at them as they fiddled with the bow underneath their neck, “Stop worrying about everything. No one can notice-“
“People have Rui, but it’s fine because it’s not like she’ll be in my life forever, plus I’m straight.”
“If you keep calling yourself straight I’ll laugh so hard I won’t give a fuck if I get a detention from a teacher, because you my friend are the furthest thing from straight. Especially about Enanan because your eyes light up the same way they did with Mia.”
“Mia was gender envy so Enanan has to be the same thing or similar.”
“I’m going to kill you one day. Seriously Mizuki are you-“
“MR KAMISHIRO, YOU HAVE A TWO HOURS DETENTION FOR THIS RECKLESSNESS. COME WITH ME NOW!?” a teacher yelled stopping Mizuki from arguing their case. They didn’t have a crush on Enanan, not in the slightest. She was just a good and kind friend, hence the smile on their face reading her most recent message.
Enanan:
How are you amia?
Ah
Youre in school arent you? Ill leave you be then.
Good luck amia! You can do this!
Oh
Erm
Do you mind helping me tonight? I want to design some representative outfits for niigo and ig i need the help...
Amia:
you guess?
Enanan:
I know
Amia:
hehe
sure
see you at 25:00
ly enanan
( ◕ ‿ ◕) ♡
Enanan:
Ily2
Also stop with the kaomojis pls
It makes me suicidal
Amia:
youre always sucidial? whats new?
Enanan:
Die.
Amia:
you first <33
✩⡱
Mizuki didn’t realise when they had fallen Enanan, they never would they assumed, but they realised the fact that they had one summer evening.
It was too hot out.
Far too hot to be normal, and they were working late. Everyone else in nightcord had left, all claiming they were exhausted from the heat, but not Mizuki. They couldn’t leave. Well they could, but they didn’t want to.
“Amia? Why are you still on call?” Enanan asked as she joined, her voice breathy and hoarse. A fan beating loudly interrupting her voice and causing a distraction to Mizuki. But they ignored it and focused on Enanan.
“Hm? I still had work to do-“
“In this heat? Are you serious? It’s too hot to be sewing or near anything right now.”
“Hence why I’m not sewing, I’m doing costume design though,” Mizuki countered. Crossing out the design they had started for Rui.
“Amia, you need to take care of yourself. Go to sleep or something,” Enanan scolded lightly to which Mizuki laughed.
“And you, Enanan, need to stop posting selfies then,” Mizuki countered as they still liked the post and commented regardless.
“Yet, here you are feeding into my internet success.”
“Only because I liked twenty videos from that cat fan page-“
“You conniving little traitor!” Enanan exclaimed.
“It’s a cute fucking cat. Maybe you should be cute for a change.”
“Play in oncoming traffic, here I was caring for you and this is how you repay me!” Enanan continued at her loud and betrayed volume as Mizuki giggled at her responses.
“That’s such a boring method of suicide,” Mizuki replied. “If anything, I would like to drink poison created by you.”
“Poison?”
Mizuki hummed as they leaned closer to the microphone, “Poison just like the venom you say to me daily.” They teased before leaning back, “or at least something that would cool me down and poison is meant to be cool before the person dies.”
“You have to be a psychopath.”
“I don’t have to be.”
“You know how doxx people and have a planned method of suicide,” Enanan pointed out in what would usually be a judgemental tone, except it was more intrigued.
“I don’t have a planned method, it’s not like I want to die and kill myself. It’s just, if you gave me a glass of poison, I’d drink it simply put.”
“That’s a lot of trust for someone you’ve met online.”
Mizuki froze as they realised what was happening. They said nothing and bit their lip as they felt sweat forming, not from the humidity as it was a cold sweat. A sweat that made them swallow intensely as Enanan continued talking on the call.
“Hello? Amia? You there? Did you die of dehydration?”
“No, no, I’m here still Enanan. Just... thinking...”
“About?”
You. Me.
“This outfit.”
“Ah, Amia, always the hard worker. Its admirable, but seriously, why don’t you sleep? It’s hot out and you’ll be more productive tomorrow.”
“I’m not tired.”
Now I’m going to be awake panicking if I do truly have a crush on you or if I want to be you, but I already know the answer. I know it’s because I like you, but it’s weird because you don’t know what I look like and you’d never like me. Not once you know the truth at least.
No one loves me when they know the truth.
Enanan groaned down the microphone as Mizuki heard different things be moved and Ena shuffling. “Then I guess I’ll do some work with you.”
“You guess?”
“Must you say this every time.”
“Yes.”
“I’m going to kill you one day.”
“I’d love to see you try.”
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
“Amia? You awake?”
“Yeah,” Mizuki responded yawning, sleep clinging to them as they worked with Enanan in companiable silence.
They enjoyed it as Enanan never checked in so they could think and attempt to realise when they had developed a crush on Ena.
They hadn’t.
They just realised that they had at some point and it was a scary feeling. A feeling of being crushed under a weight and dying.
“Jesus Christ Amia, go to sleep,” Enanan demanded as Mizuki heard her close up her sketchbook and the likes.
“I will. Later.”
“No, now.”
“No-“
“I’ll sing for you.”
Mizuki froze as they listened to Enanan. “You’ll what?”
“Sing for you. Are you deaf?”
“No, that’s just oddly nice of you.”
“I can be a nice person, besides, I need you alive and having a good amount of sleep keeps it so. So, get into bed and finish that design tomorrow,” she reasoned yawning every so often.
“You’re tired, why don’t you sleep-“
“Not without you first, I’ll sleep once I know you’re asleep.”
Mizuki sighed, “I’m not winning this am I?”
“No. I’m a stubborn individual you know, so now go to sleep, I promise I’ll sing to you.”
Mizuki nodded snd got into bed, moving to nightcord on their phone as they set it to charge. “Hmmmm what do I sing? I know! ‘Happii shinsesaiza kimi no mune no oku made. Todoku youna merodei kanaderuyo.’”
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
“You were exaggerating, I didn’t cry for a week. I cried for two days because I was in perpetual turmoil,” Mizuki emphasised, dramatically falling on the couch, their hand on their head like they were in a period drama.
“You cried for a long time.”
“Because I was scared. I mean I didn’t even know if she was gay and then well, she didn’t know it.”
“You always let your fear control you too much Mizuki,” An stated, looking at them through her mirror. “I mean, didn’t you nearly quit after you realised Ena went to your high school. Also, how did you even know that?”
“Does your fiancé know that you knew her identity for a while?” Rui asked.
“That got revealed on the fifth date.”
“Fifth date. Jesus christ,” Rui groaned whilst An furrowed her brows.
“Was this the fifth e dating or fake dating thing or like real dating?”
“Real,” Mizuki scoffed. “The fake dating was publicity for ‘Keitai Renwai’ and also proof that Ena was gay. She came out to me then actually.”
“Okay and that doesn’t establish how you knew Enanan was Shinonome Ena.”
“It was an accident-“
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ
Mizuki was still sixteen, sixteen and alive. Somehow, they hadn’t killed themselves yet which was a shock since they thought they would die at any point.
They didn’t expect to see the sun set earlier where there was a chill in the air forcing them to wear a scarf and warm clothes. Not that they wore them properly, carrying their coat as they walked through this exhibition.
Everyone looked to them and judged them but Mizuki didn’t care for once. They were here to do Christmas shopping, they wanted to decorate the small tree their mother had bought them for their room but the decorations clashed with their room theme. Silver was not pretty in a room solely based on pink.
But, they had gotten distracted. Could you blame them? The snow had started and the bus lines were busy so it was easier for them to wait it out and have their mother pick them up. So, to pass time they wandered until they happened upon an art exhibition by chance.
They had heard people talk about it online, apparently artists world wide would gather there but it was insanely popular in Japan since Shinonome Shinei would be there. This was his first exhibit in a long time, his artwork was a masterpiece apparently.
Mizuki couldn’t argue against it, but his art never spoke to them. So they weren’t fused on the exhibit, but upon further reading there were many famous designers there and Mizuki loved them. They admired their designs and some of them had worked with famous doll lines, others on action figures for anime’s and there were allegedly future designs to be shown.
It was a wide open space, many banners littered for the different artists and each person had different art. Some were unsettling, such as a display of many marionettes, others were beautiful like a display of Bratz doll designs.
They continued to walk, occasionally purchasing items (thank God for their part time job) and it was a good thing too as they find extra baubles they hadn’t discovered anywhere else. And as they walked they came to Shinei’s display where there was a massive crowd.
The display took up twice the amount of space as everyone else’s and the painting was up higher than anyone else’s. He had many people filtering around and one was a girl with a brown bob and a fast pace.
Mizuki just knew in their gut to not walk forwards, so they lingered as the girl helped someone out, seemingly smiling at them based on her body language. “Ah of course, my father is a wonderful artist,” she continued and it seemed as if time stopped.
They knew that voice. They knew Enanan’s fake voice when meeting new people. They didn’t move a muscle and instead filtered through the crowd, moving between everyone and trying to see if it was her.
And it was. It was Enanan. And they knew this because they had seen her face multiple times, I mean, she did use filters so it was harder to see her but that was Enanan. The same eyes, the same smile, the same makeup style and hair.
They sounded obsessed seeing these details right away, and maybe in a future they would be persecuted and judged more so than now. But they knew it was Enanan and that was confirmed as they received a notification from Enanan’s social media saying how she was there.
Their heart hammered, they were nearly unable to breathe so they left.
Of course their talented artist was the daughter of Shinonome Shinei, of course that was Shinonome Ena. Their Enanan.
They were sick.
✩⡱
“Amia?” Ena asked, it was only them on the call ans it was awkward. Mizuki was a nervous wreck now that they knew who she was exactly. Now that they knew her real name and identity and all Ena knew about them was the fact they were only just sixteen.
It was also more awkward because Ena had suggested fake dating for Keitai Renwai to succeed which meant K and Yuki left because they found that to be an awkward conversation. The only good thing about it was that Mizuki finally had confirmation Ena was gay, but that wasn’t too good of a benefit to have to have this conversation. But, it was a bonus if Mizuki had to be optimistic like everyone thought they were.
“Amia? You there?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m here,” they breathed out, anxiety swelling. Neither one of them were mentioning the truth or the awkwardness of what Ena had suggested flippantly, which was odd seemingly.
Ena was not cool or collected. Mizuki knew that, but Ena was not reckless and impulsive in the sense to ask someone to fake date someone. No she wasn’t that stupid, that was a Mizuki statement and not an Ena statement.
“Good, so, do you mind doing that? For publicity of course,” Ena continued, her voice shaking with hesitance as if she was scared of the answer.
And she should’ve been.
Any normal person would’ve been as fake dating rejection was almost on the same level as actual rejection admittedly. It also seemed presumptuous to ask someone to date without any knowledge of their sexual orientation, but with the messages Ena was subjected to, Mizuki could admit it was a fair statement.
“I mean, do we have to?”
“Well, no, but it would be good. Plus when we stage a break up I get more likes.”
“Is that all that matters to you?”
“No- My art matters and this group does too. Why?”
Because I wanted to know if I matter to you the way you matter to me. I wanted to know if I could trust you.
“Nothing, you just seem very focused on getting likes from this,” Mizuki justified.
“Well, I want K and Yuki’s song to reach many people and make the song seem real. It’s not a tall order, you know how K gets when a song goes somewhat viral.”
“You’re pretty selfless Ena-nan. Enanan,” they stated absentmindedly ignoring the way they almost slipped up and how wrong Enanan sounded in serious conversations.
Mizuki was all for nicknames, but they were on the idea of nicknames in everything but serious conversations. Knowing Ena’s true name and having a serious conversation made them want to call her Ena constantly, never to call them Enanan. But they couldn’t let her know that they knew who she was.
It was another dirty secret of theirs alongside that secret, their sexuality, who they loved and now, that they knew who Enanan truly was.
“Of course I am, why do you say that like it’s so shocking. They have talent and it needs to be shown because talented people should not hoard it to themselves,” Ena justified haughtily, it sounded as if she was turning her nose at the microphone with how her voice got further away.
“But what do you say? I mean, we only need to keep it up in posts so the odd message here or there and that would be it. It wouldn’t be hard to do, but I’m fine if you’re not okay with it or just not gay in general,” Ena continued as Mizuki laughed.
“I wouldn’t be opposed,” Mizuki teased, drawing out every word. “Though, I must say, dating you seems like a chore.”
And a painful journey.
“A chore?! Ugh, I’m already regretting this-“
“But, wifey, you suggested this.”
“Wifey? Jesus fucking Christ, Amia, are you trying to make suicidal.”
Mizuki gasped dramatically. “Me? Never. I love you too much for that my friend, well, wifey.”
“You took to this way too easily,” Ena stated, suspicion lacing her tone. “But I will not let you win beloved.”
“Win? Is this a challenge? Who can make the other want to fake break up first?”
“Actually, yes, and you will not win Amia.”
“Oh, I think you’re wrong about that Enanan. I never want to get away from you.”
“Hm? I think you’re wrong Amia, I’ll never let the people I care for get away, you know. Try as you might but you will never escape,” Ena teased back and Mizuki’s heart crumbled.
It was a stupid idea but at least Keitai Renwai was a success and apparently sounded more emotional than anything they had heard from either Amen (Amia and Enanan merged together for their subunit name). It was fire with fire, but at some point fire would extinguish and dis-ignite so the end came a year later.
All good things must come to an end.
:¨·.·¨:
`·.. ♡⃗ Shinonome Ena ˎˊ˗
Ena sighed as she reached the area where she would have to wait before Akito led her down the aisle and gave her to Mizuki to look after and cherish. Which they did enough anyway. They always had looked after and cherished her dearly and when they would reminisce together, they would always let details out that Ena thought they didn’t want.
Like the fact they had a crush on her since they were sixteen and her seventeen. The fact they liked the real her when she was eighteen and everything crashed and burned.
It was why Ena lost the bet admittedly, everything was crumbling around her. Her relationship with her father had dissolved entirely, Akito and her were fighting more often and college exams were upcoming and she was burdened.
It was as if everything she touched she ruined, leaving a trail of mud behind. Even Airi was leaving her alone as she began to date Shizuku as they were absolutely in ‘love.’ Ena doubted it now, but back then, there was no couple like them.
Ena was eighteen and struggling, she was barely able to help nightcord out, but the same happened for K and Yuki. At points, it was just Mizuki holding the fort down, teaching themselves anything they could to keep nightcord relevant but they couldn’t and soon nightcord at 25:00 faded into obscurity and for a while, Yuki and K and Amia were distant memories.
Distant voices that when Ena was studying too hard, she could hear echo in her mind. Telling her not to give up or let herself be creatively stifled. But she knew it was false, they were all burdened in their own pain and neglected Mizuki’s pain of being alone.
Some day’s, Ena would see the messages but be tok drained to formulate a response to them. To even open them and soon they stopped coming but when the pain grew too bad, when Ena needed them, they came back.
Maybe it was toxic.
Maybe it was cruel whenever she looked back on it, but she was glad they always came back because it gave her good reason to chase when they ran. When they wanted to escape Ena would follow and would unlock the cage on their heart somehow. Someway.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena was drained. She couldn’t think anymore ahe couldn’t feel anymore. Everything had lost its appeal, it was just grey. Everything.
She didn’t know how food became grey but it did. Her art was grey and though she knew, she knew she was using a red paint and a cream paint and the likes, it felt wrong they were in colour. If was odd to normal people, but that was how Ena’s brain was working in the moment.
She wanted to claw it out like she had clawed Akito’s arms again forcing Ken to make the ginger live with him.
That was reasonable admittedly, but she was annoyed. When would someone save her from Shinonome Shinei? Akito never had to deal with his cruelty or anger, he just had to deal with Ena’s inability to process emotions. If someone had just saved her, then Akito wouldn’t need saving.
Why didn’t people look further into the issue’s of the Shinonome household?
Oh, but Ena knew why, her father was such a loving, prized, blunt and honest man. His disappointment to aspiring artists served as inspiration for others. His scathing words were passing thoughts, they didn’t contain the same weight as them coming from your father who had a favourite child who no longer lived in the same house because his disappointment forced him out.
Oh and that caused arguments in the household. Ena versus Shinei, Ena versus her mother, Shinei versus her mother and then there would be tag team arguments. It was the most hellish thing until Ena gave up. She wouldn’t say she was sorry, she was too prideful for that and she would never be sorry for lashing out at Akito. Sometimes, her jealousy couldn’t handle it because she knew why her father favoured him. He had the natural artistic talent. He was the prodigy, was he wasting his talent by going down the route of music, yes but that was his passion and Ena wouldn’t stop him from doing that. Not when she led him down that path. And by leading him down that path, Akito was happy and Ena had the chance of earning her father’s love again. Though, that would never happen.
No one could reason with Shinonome Shinei. Not even the golden child as he was there that evening because of course he was. Their mother wanted a family dinner to mend the bridges broken but they were broken beyond repair. Shinei and Ena would never see eye to eye, they would never be the loving family her mother wanted.
That evening solidified it.
At least she didn’t have to cut off Akito, not wholly. He still was good enough that Ena didn’t loathe him, she couldn’t. Even if he was a pain and she wanted to hate him, he was still her younger brother.
She didn’t know when the tears had started to fall on the cold bathroom floor, when the banging on the door had stopped. When there was no yelling of her parents.
Why was she crying?
She knew he hated her, always had. He would never love her, never be able to love her and never wanted to. She was the disappointment of the family, whatever she touched was ruined.
If she touched someone’s heart, they were tainted with bad thoughts, if she touched one of Akito’s drafts it became soulless. A knife ceased to be just a knife and became a friend, cold friend that would drag along the skin but make everything else not drag- No. That was too depressing for her.
It was why she locked herself in the bathroom. In her room she had a scalpel, small knives and scissors ajs the likes.
In here, it was only his razors and Ena was petty, but she wasn’t killing herself with his items. Letting him have the last laugh. If Ena were to commit suicide, it was through her own means and methods, taking control of her life like she always had.
So it was just her, the cold floor and a phone.
She couldn’t post to social media, posting her crying face would be disgusting and she would have to come clean to thousands of people online about her struggles. Additionally, some people knew her as Shinonome Shinei’s daughter leaving her with no one to turn to online.
Other than...
No, K was busy revising, Yuki the same and Amia. Sweet little Amia who she had ghosted. Was she that cruel?
Evidently, her fingers lingering over the nightcord button proved she was. And if she had already gone so far to do this, then what would pressing it do.
She was already a pathetic failure, what was more disappointing action to do to her? Nothing.
It was why she ignored the pangs of guilt as she read through Amia’s messages. They were caring and doting, making sure Ena was okay and alive. She wasn’t okay, but she was alive barely if that was consolation.
Amia:
May 23rd
enanan
you okay?
i miss you
good luck this year
you can smash this
if you need any help/inspiration im here for you
hehe
speak to you if you have the time
ly wifey~~~
☆*:. ｡.o( ≧▽≦)o. ｡.:* ☆
June 6th
hey enanan
its been a while
well not really
but okay maybe a little
erm
i missed you
and i wanted to see if youre okay
remember to take breaks
dont overdo it okay?
ily
June 30th
were all on call now
wanted to see if you wanted to join
enanan
you know i can see your posts
whatever
ill tell k and yuki youre busy and leave you alone
good luck revising
July 17th
*attachment*
i made a song for you
its bad but
i wanted to show you how much i missed you
lol
thats pathetic hehe
but its true
i miss my wife and i hope shes taking care of herself
August 27th
you not joining the call?
oh
okay
i expected you here when you said you wanted us all to celebrate our birthdays together but i guess youre busy
you do have entrance exams soon huh
good luck btw
theres an art university that i think youll try to get into
theyre rlly good apparently
i hope (if you are going there) you get it because you can do it enanan
you have the talent
dont get stuck in your head okay
hehe
ily
October 4th
hey are you alive?
ive missed you
and the rest of niigo
its lonely you know?
its hard keeping down the fort with no guidance honestly
its scary too
but i guess my fears are childish compared to yours though
hmm
im bored honestly
i miss talking to you about utter nonsense and my animes you hated
so im going to use this as a place of dead space
such as rui has been leaving me because he got a partner. Idk much about them, he wont tell me. it stings honestly, but it could be worse i suppose.
*message has been deleted*
ah that was too much info let me delete that hehe
what else can i go on abt
theres not much tbh
life has been boring. theres been little to no laughter but that is what happens when everyone hates you isnt it hehe
you would know that wouldnt you enanan~~~
ahaha
thats cruel actually
im sorry
i just
miss you
let me know youre alive
just an ok will do
or even a k
or any letter
this is pathetic actually
ignore me and my ramblings
good night enanan
November 5th
idk why i still try
but
i hope youre alive enanan
and you can do this
im here for you always
hehe
November 12th
Enanan:
Amia
You there?
Amia:
ENANAN!??!?!?!?!
YOURE ALIVE
AND HERE
OH MY GOD
ITS A MIRACLE
HOW ARE YOU
WE HAVENT SPOKEN IN FOREVER
and i missed you alot
especially when you posted to social media but never replied to me
i was wondering if you had muted me or hated me hehe
Enanan:
Hate you? How could i hate you?
Youre my partner.
Amia:
you havent been replying
but its fine
everyone has shit right
how have you been
Enanan:
*message is deleted*
Good
Enough
Amia:
enough?
thats not actually good then
lol
whats wrong
do you want to call?
for old times sake
Enanan:
No
Amia:
oh okay
do you need anything
Enanan:
No
I dont know why i did this honestly
Amia:
reach out to me?
Enanan:
Yeah
Never mind
Forget this happened
Ill only fuck you up the way i am
Amia:
??????
enanan~~~
enanan
pick up
please
let me help
enanan
you havent spoken to me in months
you reached out for a reason
let me help please
let me help my wife
Enanan:
Stop calling me that
Amia:
what?
you my wife?
Enanan:
Yes.
Amia:
why
Enanan:
Because ill ruin you too
Ill make you see the world like this
This was a mistake
Im sorry
Amia:
nothing is a mistake you know
but im not leaving you
i swear
let me in
ill worry about you forever
Enanan:
Forever?
Even when im a broken mess whos been ignoring you for months?
Amia:
yes
and youre a bitch for that
but
yes ill worry forever enanan because i care for you
a lot
Enanan:
Alright
But dont make fun of my voice
Crying makes me ugly, both in voice and looks
Amia:
youre never ugly
youre always beautiful and so is your voice
my favourite drug
Enanan:
Youre so strange.....
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena was never one to believe in romance. She was often said to say that chivalry was dead, and it was, but that evening sitting on the phone talking to Mizuki soothed everything.
Confessing to them her fears and worries, talking a little about her struggles without giving too much away they could figure out who she was as she knew they could doxx people who had little to know info on them. What could they do with someone with a very famous father?
But they didn’t doxx her, largely because they knew who she was already, and they liked her enough to not do so. They were a calming presence in the ocean of stress, in her fight to pick up everything and run away, changing identity, moving from place to place.
They grounded her and in that year and stress and disappointment. In that year of getting disowned and outed, Amia was her anchor as she got lost in sea. As she got lost in a world without passion or life, as she had to admit to herself she had lost herself.
But she would find herself again, suitcase and belongings in hand as entered university.
Shinonome Ena was nineteen and free.
｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡
ﾟ。 Akiyama Mizuki
ﾟ･｡･ﾟ
As they stood there and looked out at the small venue, a little backroom in ‘Weekend Garage’ courtesy of Ken. Mizuki realised how small and insignificant their life was for a while, how when their life truly mattered they were with Ena.
When they were eighteen, their memory was patchy. They just remembered how they had learnt how to drive and passed the university entrance exams with flying colours. They were a naturally gifted student even if they were still never there.
But, at eighteen, that was when Mizuki stumbled upon ‘Weekend Garage’ late at night. The cold biting their cheeks as they stumbled through the streets, they decided to loosen up for once and be adventurous. And visit and see new parts of Tokyo.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Mizuki was walking, strange for someone like them, but it was a trek nonetheless. It was late out, a beautiful February evening. The sun had just set and the moon was up above, guiding them as they explored the new place, careful of the graffiti on the ground and avoiding the bars.
Their head was down as they walked, careful of the wiring for the live music acts that weren’t accepted into any of the lounges.
“Oh, come on Akito! Be serious!” A girl yelled, walking out of a café that was still open based on the amount of people sat there.
The bell was ringing as they stood outside and Mizuki just stood there and watched. Intrigued admittedly.
“Can you blame me! I don’t want to be there with her, she doesn’t even like me,” the ginger man grumbled as the blue haired girl slapped his chest.
“That is your sister, she just has her own way of caring. Maybe her being argumentative is her way of expressing it,” the blue haired girl countered, flicking her hair back.
“Can you stop seeing the good in people and just accept- Oh, hello,” the ginger greeted, cutting off the argument as he spotted Mizuki stood there like a deer caught in headlights.
They gulped and then tried not to gulp again, any throat movements always let people clue themselves in on it. They were still a nervous wreck, but had perfected sounding more feminine over time as they fiddled with their skirt.
“Oh, hi! I’ve never seen you before, I’m An and that’s Akito,” the blue haired girl smiled, cocking her head to the ginger. “Welcome to Vivid Street. You seem lost, are you okay?”
“Fine, I was just... looking at new scenery,” Mizuki answered hoping they sounded confident. “I didn’t mean to over hear-“
“It’s fine,” Akito stated, his voice losing a cheerful aspect. “It’s nothing that others haven’t heard here.”
An laughed stiffly at the fact before hitting Akito, “But, that doesn’t mean its a regular occurrence. Vivid Street is the place to be and so is Weekend Garage, why don’t you come on in with me and Akito?”
“This seems like a ploy for something,” Mizuki stated as they walked forward to An, “Lead the way An.”
“I like you, its been a while since I’ve had a girl around here,” An rambled as Akito stalked behind them, him missing the way Mizuki stiffened at being called a girl. They knew An didn’t mean ill from it, it was an honest mistake but they still were uncomfortable with it. Internalised hatred was somehow the worse they realised when confronted with bright and cheery An.
“Hey, dad!” An called out, walking to the bar, Akito coming behind Mizuki and her. “Give us the people’s favourite, I have a new friend here.”
“A new friend? Is this your partner?” Ken teased, moving around and getting out different granules. Akito laughed behind them, taking off his jacket and placing it over the counter as the café grew loud wirh music.
“There’s a reason they’re new,” An stated, confusion with the usage of ‘they’ as she looked to Mizuki almost as if she knew something. And Mizuki hated that.
They thought they looked feminine, why wasn’t it enough? Why did people notice? Did she hate them? Would she talk about them behind their back? Or did she notice them stiffen at the usage of ‘she?’
It wasn’t a negative thing, just more of a shocking thing. Most people realised they weren’t who they presented themselves as, well not when they were born. People would take a glance over and realise who they were, most often made fun of them for it. Being ignorant and unaccepting, but it was fair enough when they barely accepted themselves.
How and why did they get upset when people assumed they were female yet get upset when people realised who they were? It wasn’t fair. It was stupid and cruel and hypocritical. But that was how they were, they wanted people to see them as female but not refer to them as such.
Was that difficult to understand?
“So, in kind words they aren’t,” Akito grumbled, resting on the counter. Hand in chin as he looked to Ken, “Can you make me-“
“I have a hot chocolate on the way, don’t you worry,” Ken justified as he set out a tray. “And there’s cheesecake for you too and your drink and dessert An. What would you like Mizuki?”
“Erm, I would like some strawberry cake.”
“Good choice, dad makes it the best, especially around here,” An boasted to which Akito scoffed.
“Could you be less of a boaster about Ken?”
“I’m merely telling Mizuki how good this café is, its good advice anyone would give to a friend.”
“You’re friends?”
“We will be! I’ll make sure of it, they’re going to be apart of our community. Trust.”
✩⡱
Mizuki enjoyed their time with An, according to Ena they seemed happier and free. They were still hesitant though as in one week they’d be starting university, An was by their side though in a way. So was Rui, both were attending the same university as them but Mizuki was still scared.
As much as An had become a safe space, a safe person, someone who helped them with their singing and their voice. She was still unaware of their secret and the people Mizuki would have to dorm with would be too.
But it was going to be fine as they were both older, second year students. They didn’t know how it happened, originally they were staying with a first year student who was a Musical Theatre studier but then they made a mistake on the system and had to swap one of them with another person. Mizuki was the one who was swapped.
They didn’t know who their roommates were or if they would be accepting. It was hard to hide their secret with people they were close to.
One example was K the other day, they were singing a new song. One based off of a ‘hunch’ Yuki called it. Whatever the context was Mizuki had practically forgotten as they focused on K’s words looping in their mind. Since K agreed with Yuki and was the actual composer, her words held more of a graveness to them than Yuki’s.
What she noted mattered more.
‘There’s a quality to your voice that the rest of us are unable to match.’
K was a mysterious person Mizuki had realised. One minute she was perceptive, the next a pun could be said and Yuki would have to explain it to her as Ena lacked the patience and Mizuki felt too guilty to speak. She barely noticed Ena’s obvious habits such as when she had artists block, she would post many times (though only Mizuki contained this knowledge) and she would be late. Yuki agreed with Mizuki on this observation, but K didn’t as she didn’t realise it.
Yet, K was able to recognise when Ena was in a good mood and confident in her art, she would be talking and lively. Constantly engaging with them and letting her presence be known and if she was in a bad mood, the opposite would happen.
That made Mizuki nervous and hesitant, I mean it had taken her what? Three or four years? That wasn’t too bad, but it made them nervous with how she had recognised.
If the most oblivious person known to man could see that Mizuki was a lying fraud, then why didn’t everyone else?
And what would their dorm mates think of them?
Mizuki was a bundle of anxiety, so much so, they missed whatever An was talking to them about. Going off on a tangent about whatever music she was into as they were drinking coffee on their way.
“Hello? Earth to Mizu?” An asked, looking to Mizuki who seemed to be somewhere distance, off in a different place as she led them into Weekend Garage. It was empty and quiet for once, a nice space for a private conversation Mizuki supposed judging from the determination on An’s face.
“What’s wrong with you?” An asked, leading them to a table where they could face one another as Mizuki smiled at her.
The grin hurt to force.
They had gotten used to not having to force a smile, they needed to fix that. They had to.
“Nothing, just thinking about university and my course,” they reasoned. Trying to smile at An as best as they could.
“Ah, university, God we’re old,” An laughed.
Mizuki laughed too, emptily though they tried to get emotion into it as their heart clenched. It hurt, a lot. It was a new environment with new people where they had to live on the edge and-
Why did their heart hurt this way?
They weren’t stabbed, unfortunately, so why did it hurt and why were they shaking like a leaf? It was cold, sure, but they weren’t dying. It wasn’t as if lakes were frozen anymore, it was just a simple and dull chill that was biting at their shoulders and cheeks.
“Hey, hey, don’t cry? What’s wrong?” An rushed out, moving a tissue towards them and holding their hand tight.
God they hated that.
They had to have noticed how big their hands were, how undainty and ladylike they were. Why didn’t she say anything? Life would be so much easier if she did and then orchestrated them like everyone else, judged them for what they were.
“Hey, Mizu, breathe.”
Stop. Just stop just stop. Stop being affectionate and caring. You’re killing me An. You’re killing me but you’re not fucking stabbing me yet. Give me the God damn finishing fucking blow An. Fucking end me. Let me fucking die. I can’t fucking breathe.
“Hey, Mizu, its just me your An. What’s wrong?” she continued, pestering them. She was too loud, but she was there. They could reach out to grab her and they did, tears staining their eyes as they broke and everything was spilled.
They didn’t know why An made them feel safe, maybe it was the way she picked up the subtle context clues of them being trans yet not wanting to be referred to as femininely because they were them. They liked being Mizuki, the only label being that they were transfem.
An also understood their fear of staying in an apartment with people, she didn’t understand it in a sense she could resonate with it but she was able to comprehend the issue and sympathise with them. She was able to soothe their fears of people judging them because she didn’t. She accepted them wholly and when Akito came over, she grew defensive and moved the conversation to her childhood bedroom.
And An was always a good friend, but from that point onwards, they were best friends. Mizuki trusted An too much as she would protect them too, even in university as society would always be judgemental assholes. But An never let Mizuki veer too far into the darkness because she was understanding and a safe space.
She never pried though she assumed their secret but she let them talk to her and Mizuki was happy. Mizuki was free for a while, until university started and Ena was complaining in the group chat.
Fate was weird.
:¨·.·¨:
`·..♡⃗ Shinonome Ena ˎˊ˗
Ena was annoyed, very annoyed. She had gotten used to dorming with Tsukasa and Rui including whatever their relationship was. She was able to tune them out and live in peace with them, each one understanding they had to give a wide birth to one another and never prying more than necessary. She actually liked them even if she was loathe to admit it to anyone.
But, now, she had to get used to someone new. Someone strange living with her and Tsukasa all because Tsukasa and Rui couldn’t be trusted. Admittedly, it was a fair enough point after they nesrly blew up the school. However, Ena still hated it and what made it worse was that it was a freshman who was joining them.
Ena could feel her tempter fraying. She hadn’t felt like this since the night she got disowned, but she stayed calmed and plastered a smile on her face and posted to social media.
When in doubt let others soothe you with their lies when they were certainly talking about you behind your back.
Let others calm you, such as Amia and Yuki. K was doing K things (sleeping on a desk) whilst Yuki was also moving back into her dormitory at her university, her new home until she became a doctor like she wanted. Amia on the other hand was still on their way to their new dormitory as they were only starting university, it was stressful for Ena to be unable to help them but that was the curse of internet best friends.
Enanan:
The intruder still hasnt arrived yet
Lol
Amia:
would it kill you to be nicer to them
Yuki:
Good luck Enanan.
Enanan:
Thank you yuki
And to answer your question amia, yes it would
I had a routine with the other two
Now i need to re-establish it
Amia:
oh no
how horrible
Enanan:
Could you try to be sympathetic
Amia:
OH NO!
ENANAN THAT IS SO FOUL!
I cant believe~~~ you have to be nice to someone
how cruel
....
is that better
Enanan:
I need you to die.
Yuki:
No death threats.
Please.
It’s Amia’s first day at university, let them experience it properly. Then you can tell them to die.
Amia:
WTF YUKI???
Enanan:
HAHAH
DESERVED
Yuki ily
Youre my fave
Amia:
go fuck yourself
HOLY FUCK
I FINALLY FOUND THE FUCKINF ACCOMODATION
Yuki:
?
Enanan:
What do you mean by finally
Amia:
youre smart
ish anyway
i can finally park this car and UNPACK
Enanan:
You drive?
What the fuck?
Amia:
yeah
did i not tell you
lol?
Enanan:
NO
YOU DIDNT
IM BETRAYED
Amia:
Im sorry enanan~~~
can i kiss you to make it up to you
( っ ˘з(˘ ⌣˘ ) ♡
Enanan:
Never mind that just made me more suicidal than i am
Amia:
NO KILLING YOURSELF
OR ELSE
Enanan:
What are you going to do hm~~~
Amia:
that feels so wrong when you do it
but idk
i could always doxx you and kill you
Enanan:
...
Fair enough
I didnt say anything
Shit
Sounds like theyre here
Ughhhh
Wish me luck
Yuki:
Good luck Enanan.
Amia:
YEAH!
YOU GOT THIS ENANAN~~~
Ena stood next to Tsukasa who seemed ready and firm in his stance. Confident as always whilst she seemed meek in comparison to his powerful stance. She was under dressed for this, but then again, it wasn’t as if she needed to make the best first impression on them anyway.
No, Ena needed to look professional and pretty though in case they recognised her from social media.
She had a reputation after all as the member of Nightcord at 25:00 who wasn’t anonymous, though she was getting closer for Amia to break that vow and also no longer be anonymous but there was hesitance there.
For as much as Ena denied it, Amia didn’t trust her the same way she trusted them and it hurt a little. Actually, a lot when she thought about but she wasn’t too bothered by it.
At least that was what she told herself to stop herself from frowning and scaring her roommate away (though that wasn’t a bad idea admittedly).
“Stop frowning, you are in the presence of a future star,” Tsukasa stated proudly, fixing his glasses as he combed his fingers through his hair.
Egoist.
“I wasn’t frowning-“
“You were and it ruined your makeup,” Tsukasa stated, holding up a mirror to her face as Ena tutted and rubbed away the smudged lipstick. She loathed it when Tsukasa took care of her like she were his sister, but it felt nice for someone to look our for her, in their own way.
“Fuck me, I thought you said it was transfer proof!” Ena exclaimed, reapplying it where it had disappeared, a crease forming on her forehead.
“That’s what it said it was! And according to my sister it is!”
“Well it isn’t!”
“I’m sorry Ena!”
“You should be!” Ena huffed and glared at him playfully before she pulled out her phone to quadruple check she looked perfect. She was getting better at not living up to expectations, but she still felt the pride and fear as her father’s daughter. Though she no longer was technically.
“Oh look,” Tsukasa pointed out, gesturing to the door. “Our roommates here.” And Ena groaned and the door swung open and it was like a breath of fresh air.
She was pretty, pink hair in a ponytail, a nervous but bright smile on her face as she wore something akin to a Victorian Child’s outfit. A dark blue bow was attached to her ponytail, the exact same bow hung around the neck of her dress which was whites and greys. Very minimalist but very stylist.
Ena liked her though she seemed very scared upon noticing her. It was like a startled cat, she looked like she wanted to run away but she didn’t and smiled at them. Saying nothing.
Ena frowned and nudged Tsukasa, he was always rhe nicer of the two, plus she was mentally swooning over the girl finding her insanely pretty and her makeup and style was perfect. It reminded her of Mizuki oddly enough, though she assumed they did not like to dress in a Victorian style. They seemed to haughtily to do so.
“Ah, welcome!” Tsukasa beamed as she jumped from the intensity of his voice, looking to the ground and moving her suitcase in front of her. “I’m the world’s future star, the most famous actor in the making, Tenma Tsukasa. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”
She nodded and smiled at Tsukasa before hesitantly turning her gaze to Ena, who frowned but spoke anyway. She found it rude that she didn’t offer Tsukasa a reply, but maybe she wanted to extend the gratitude to them both at the same time.
“Pleased to meet you, I’m Shinonome Ena, an aspiring artist,” she greeted, her taking a cheery tone causing Tsukasa to scoff and the girl in front of her to bite down on her laughter.
“You are?” Tsukasa asked, gesturing to the person in front of them as she blushed red, fiddling with her skirt.
“I’m- I’m Akiyama Mizuki,” they stated as Ena was hit with a sense of whiplash recognising the voice instantaneously. The person she had had some deep and meaningful conversations with, the person she had cried to with, dreamed about because she hated the way they teased her yet loved it all the same.
They looked away as Ena stared at them, feeling as if they had walked up to her and slapped her in the face. She was frozen especially as they looked up at her, scared and hesitant, their throat going like crazy with stress.
Ena wanted to scream, but she couldn’t. They wanted to be upset, but they couldn’t. People chose the life they wanted and Amia, well Mizuki, wanted to be anonymous and hide their identity.
Ena could never be upset at them, but she was hurt by the notion they knew her. Which made sense, she trusted them enough to have her social media, but to not say anything upon seeing her.
That hurt.
It also hurt her to call them ‘her’ multiple times. She had listened to their rants after K had called them ‘her’ once in a call and they seemed very disparaged and upset. She had been there for them in their time of need, and yet they had fucked up and did something wrong.
Their best friend.
That was also what hurt Ena, she had thought this fleeting crush on pixels would fade. And it had, it was why she so stupidly wanted to fake date even though they cursed one another, they yelled, they spoke sweetly to one another. Seeing them and what they looked like, Ena was in shock.
They were gorgeous. Better than what she originally thought. Not that she thought they’d be ugly, she always knew they’d be pretty since they had an eye for fashion and had a nice personality and-
Fuck.
Ena was fucked as they smiled coyly at her.
“Mizuki, nice name,” Tsukasa complimented. “What do you do because Ena is my super star artist, so I need to give you a nickname worthy of a star from the brightest star of them all.” He practically yelled as Mizuki jumped and Ena slapped him harshly.
“Ignore him Ami- Mizuki. Mizuki,” Ena stated, “He’s arrogant and loud.”
Amia laughed, tension leaving their body as they looked to Ena. “Why don’t I help you get settled and Tsukasa can order us food in thanks to his rich parents?” she smiled to them both, forcing a smile at Tsukasa so he could get the hint.
“Do I look like I have that money?”
“So whenever Rui asked for it you would do it but I can’t ask for a treat to greet and welcome our new friend into this accommodation? Sexist. Besides, a true star would help his friends to shine alongside him,” Ena continued smiling widely.
“You!”
“Me!?”
“What would you like Mizuki?” Tsukasa sighed as he opened his phone, “And no Ena, you don’t get a choice on where we eat. As it’s for our new friend, she-“
“They,” Ena stated rapidly causing Mizuki to flush and bounce on their heels. “They.” She repeated getting it into Tsukasa’s skull without forcing a conversation out of Amia, they never mentioned it so that was that. She never felt the urge to bring it up unless they wanted to.
“They’re our new friend then, they should choose where to eat from,” Tsukasa continued looking to Ena who gave no response as Amia played with their hands, running their hands over their nails and toying with them.
“Erm, I’m not really hungry, why don’t you two decide?” They insisted to which Ena clucked at.
God they were too considerate. She wanted to kill them.
“Just order us something from a place that sells curry and chips,” Ena waved off, frustration brewing at this meek Amia in front of her.
Amia blinked, their pink eyes going wide as they stared at Ena in awe before regaining control of their emotions and shying away from her and Tsukasa who raised his brow. “Okay? But you don’t like curry-“
“So? Its for Mizuki,” Ena justified heading towards them and the door, “Come on. Let’s go and get the rest of your stuff because I doubt this is all of it.”
“You’d be right about that,” Mizuki smiled as they pushed their suitcase out of the way of the small living room, dining room, kitchen and entrance way.
They still seemed scared and ready to flee, as if Ena was intentionally trying to corner them and murder them. She wouldn’t, she liked them enough to not do that and they hadn’t annoyed her though she was frustrated at how little they spoke to her. At how they had retreated into the shell they lived in when she first met them and then when they met K and Yuki.
“Good! I’ll help you as Tsukasa order’s himself food and Saki and Rui and-“
“How did you know that?” Tsukasa asked harshly as Ena merely chuckled and wrapped her hand on Mizuki’s elbow, having to reach just a little as they were taller than her, disgustingly, and dragging them outside.
“Ena!”
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena was about to explode as she heard the music begin, it was a rendition of ‘Lower one’s eyes’ soft and melodic. The song that became her’s and Mizuki’s song as they broke down each other’s walls, the song that promised they would always stay together no matter what which was shocking.
Looking back, Ena had expected them to run away when she tried confronting them the first time when she was nearly twenty and they were turning nineteen that summer.
The fear on their face was something Ena would never know until later, they would never confess to her their identity until later still scared Ena would run away. Yearning to keep their love the same and everything frozen in place.
But that couldn’t be. That would never be and this song and this wedding was a symbol of them moving forward and onwards together.
Ena smiled tensely to Akito as he held out his elbow, she thought that when this would happen she would feel worse about not having a father, but her brother was someone better. He was a better man than their father ever could be with the way he acted and how he carried himself.
“You scared now?”
“Very,” Ena replied, smoothing her dress as the doors began to open slowly. Almost teasingly as she grew frustrated, shaking viciously whilst Akito smiled.
“You’ll be fine, you two truly love one another,” he justified to Ena, trying to soothe her worries.
“I know that. I know how strong our love is. I’m just. A nervous wreck, weddings are always scary, but at least I have you by my side.”
“Me?”
“Yeah. You’re a good brother.”
Akito didn’t grace her with a response as the door swung open, courtesy of a Shizuku who looked upset and a Tsukasa who looked near enough to tears with happiness.
Ena wasn’t upset, she couldn’t ask for a response from Akito, but the fact he was there and was standing by her side was proof enough. The fact he was going to stand next to Airi (who looked gorgeous by the way) beside her as she was an emotional wreck, was enough proof that he cared for her.
She smiled softly as she walked the small pathway, it was short but she was glad for it otherwise she would’ve expected Mizuki to run away by now. But they hadn’t. The whole time they stared at her as if she was their world, their whole world and sun and life.
She blushed holding the bouquet of narcissus, drawing closer and closer to them and whoever would make them legally married.
Her heart was hammering as she looked at how their hair was, pearls in the braid as their hair fell down their back, cascading beautifully as their dress was pleated and ruffled. A Mizuki creation, same for everyone else’s outfits bar hers as, well, she was superstitious and wanted to avoid a cursed marriage to Mizuki. She was strange like that.
“Hi,” she breathed out as Akito handed her towards Mizuki who took her hand daintily and led her to stand in front of them as Akito stood beside Airi who swatted him for his unbuttoned tuxedo causing the group to stifle their laughter.
“Good morning.”
“Formal.”
“I know.”
“Scared?”
“Never. Are you scared Enanan~~?”
Ena laughed to herself as Shizuku and Tsukasa took their seats near the front (though they were the only guests outside of Ken). Shizuku moving slowly and gracefully as she tried not to cry whilst Tsukasa had already started sobbing.
Rui rolled his eyes as Mizuki laughed, “Thank God Saki isn’t getting married,” they teased him, still holding Ena’s hand as he began to sob loudly.
Ena loved this.
She loved her made family.
“Don’t tease him,” Akito grumbled from beside Airi who swatted him with her bouquet.
“Akito shut the fuck up!” An yelled, playing with her dress that was similar to Airi’s but wasn’t a periwinkle colour, but instead a gradient. A vibrant blue that faded to black at the bottom of the dress, the lace did the same too.
“An~~~,” Rui teased as the girl huffed and looked to him.
“That’s my brother basically.”
Airi shrugged as laughter spread across them, the wedding being unserious and hysterical as Ena just couldn’t hold herself proud.
She would love to stay here forever, even if there was a pouty Mizuki opposite her and she was unable to kiss the pout away as everyone ‘argued’ with one another.
How magical.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena sighed as she stood in the lift with Mizuki, it was awkward to say the least. Neither one of them wanted to mention the elephant in the room, electing to ignore it but Ena didn’t want to ignore it. She wanted to talk with them, to finally get to know them and not Amia. To know the real Mizuki.
“So, Mizuki, huh?” Ena asked as they reached the bottom, letting them lead the way to their car.
“What? Are you upset you were so uncreative Enanan?” they teased, not letting her breathe as they smiled at her.
“There’s nothing wrong with Enanan,” she huffed standing by their car as they gave her a few suitcases to take.
“No, there isn’t. It’s cute just awfully uncreative, Amia on the other hand is far superior. Cute and creative,” they continued, taking out a massive metal case.
“Jesus Christ, what’s in there?”
“Makeup.”
“How many pink eye liners do you need?” Ena asked leaning on one of their suitcase handles.
“On average... hmmm... 260,” they answered playing along with Ena, “But, I could part with one of them should you like one.”
“Only one of them? When I’m your best friend? What if I needed to do an art project with makeup and your pink eyeliners were just perfect for the job, would i be able to use more?”
“They’re liquid ones.”
“Firstly, liquid is disgusting. But... what brand is it?”
“L’Oreal,” they replied attaching their bags to the suitcases and closing the boot down.
“Good, because if it was Dior...”
“I do not have that type of money Enanan, otherwise I wouldn’t be staying here,” Mizuki justified, smiling and laughing as Ena lugged along two suitcase’s. “You’re comfortable with this right... with me?”
Ena frowned, looking at Mizuki as they impatiently waited for the lift, rolling on their ankles in nerves. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be? I mean is it weird for my internet friend to live with me, yeah, but its Tokyo. It was to be expected I guess.”
Amia frowned as if they wanted to say something more but they resisted. They said nothing to her and walked into the lift ignoring the tension they had created from how little they had said.
It was a loaded gun that question. Direct yet distant.
Ena wanted to figure out the complexities of Mizuki and words.
✩⡱
Ena sat at the small glass table eating in silence as Mizuki and Tsukasa talked. A lot. They understood one another and laughed happily, talking constantly about different musicals and costume designing.
Amia had unpacked earlier, with Ena’s help as they worked in silence. It was tension filled yet neither wanted to acknowledge it as they ate the chips and rice together.
It was something new and special.
“So, Mizuki you never answered me earlier. What do you study? I do acting, Ena does art though with how often she sings she should do music,” Tsukasa mentioned causing Ena to kick him under the table. “Bitch.”
“You make it seem like I sing at all hours in the morning. I don’t do it that often.”
“You do cry often enough-“
“Art is stressful,” she hissed.
“So is theatre and yet I don’t cry-“
“Can you two stop fighting?” Mizuki spoke up, breaking the tension as Ena started to curl her fist up. “I do fashion design-“
“I thought it would be videography?”
“That’s a hobby, like music,” they defended. “Fashion design is my passion, if I could be a fashion designer for everyone I would.”
Ena raised her brow at them but made no comment as Tsukasa wrapped them up in conversation, entertaining them as Ena thought on what they said.
They were a person who contained stories and Ena was intrigued.
✩⡱
Ena was dying, she was failing already not even a month into university. Both with her educational and emotionally, they were killing her.
Emotionally, her and Mizuki refused to acknowledge to K and Yuki how they now finally knew one another in real life. They also both refused to acknowledge one another outside of nightcord especially when they were both missing for long stretches of time doing work. She was also worrying about their complexity with words.
Ena had never really realised that Mizuki was selective with what they said. Words for them were specific and selective, you could tell them something but they’d find a loophole. Asking if they were okay was a bad choice, asking if they were emotionally good was better. But no one ventured that far as they seemed like a bright bundle of energy.
With her education, she was practically failing art so much so her art teacher hesitated to go near her and was assigning her a partner. Admittedly, did make her suicidal and go down emotionally when she thought about it. However, this was specifically related to education.
So, she decided to say fuck it and attend a party with Airi and Shizuku even if she was third wheeling with them. She held onto her red cup filled with whiskey as the music pounded against her head giving her a headache.
“What’s got you drinking? No one has seen you here in a while,” Airi stated, fixing the big bow in her hair as she drank brandy out of her cup.
“You know the person I had a crush on?” Ena began the alcohol clouding her judgement.
“You had a crush on someone?” Shizuku asked, pulling up her jacket as she leant on the couch next to Airi both resting their feet from their big heeled boots.
“The online one? Or me?”
“If it was you Airi I’d come out clean and say ‘I like you again.’ So, what do you think Airi?” Ena retorted snappily, her emotions finally boiling over.
“You are not e-dating again,” Airi sighed putting down the empty cup, tossing her hair back as Shizuku leant on her shoulder.
“It’s not really e-dating if we live together now,” Ena smiled. “But, I don’t have a crush on them again though at least. It’s just awkward because we both act like we don’t know one another to Tsukasa but we let slip too many details that he get’s suspicious and fuck, they’re so stubborn in not being honest.”
“Oh really?”
“They’re worse than me. I mean, I’ve broken down to them after... You know what happened, I mean I didn’t tell them about Akito but I’ve somewhat cried to them.”
“And that counts for something?”
“Yes!” Ena exclaimed passing Shizuku her empty cup as the blue haired girl stood up getting them another round of drinks. “I don’t know Airi, I just want to speak to them and vice versa because there’s something they’re hiding and I don’t know it. But it’s there because Tsukasa twigged onto something the other day but won’t tell me and they’re so strange with words.”
“Strange?”
“Their words have a double meaning and I can’t figure it out because I cant figure them out but there’s something wrong with them.”
“Why? Because they’re in your group of fucked up bandits?”
“I’ll fuck you up.”
“What? It’s a simple statement, normal people don’t sing songs about dying and depression. At least sane people who aren’t fucked in the head,” Airi countered. “But anyway, back to your girlfriend-“
“Partner. They don’t like gendered terms, I got that out of them the other night when they were half asleep and I think Saki called them ‘girl’? It was a blur honestly. But also, we aren’t together,” Ena corrected, a red hue spreading across her cheeks.
Okay. So maybe she was lying to herself and everyone else about no longer crushing on Mizuki because she was. Especially after she had seen them because it truly humanised them and before, she classed them as pixels. A figment of her imagination, but now she could touch them and she constantly wanted to even though they always shied away so she never overstepped the boundary.
And now, she wanted to break down their walls. They wanted them to stay strong but Ena could see the cracks and maybe it was invasive and rude to abuse the cracks.
However, Mizuki would do the same. And they had whenever she struggled after Akito’s birthday, after getting disowned for being gay and it finally being the recognition everyone needed to accept her as a disappointment.
Mizuki always helped Nightcord at 25:00 when they needed it. When Yuki’s good girl persona broke, when Kanade needed that reassurance and when Ena got lost to her depression. They lifted everyone up and took care of them yet ran away when someone else did that for them.
She didn’t love them, she couldn’t not when she didn’t know them properly and truly. But her heart wanted to. It was why ‘Keitai Renwai’ was so bitter. Her feelings for Mizuki were bittersweet.
They were too complex.
She needed to forget them all and drink her sorrows away.
It was causing a headache, her head hurt. She hated thinking emotionally, its why she just scratched Akito when she got overwhelmed. She just lashed out but now, in university, she could drink her woes away and never have to think hard about anything.
That drink, that cup of venom was so nice for her she realised as Airi tried to make her see reason but seeing reason was stupid.
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena paused as she looked to Mizuki, she nearly started to laugh thinking about that party. That drunken kiss in front of everyone when she was an emotional wreck unable to function normally and date whilst Mizuki was, well, Mizuki. Closed off. Distant. Someone who could stand out, yet never aimed to. It was a consequence.
But then the drunken kiss escalated because of course it did, it always would and emotional intimacy was ruined.
Ena felt guilty sometimes, most of the time, but when Mizuki laughed with her. Cupping her cheek and plastering kisses all over her face as they leaned in and started to laugh against her neck.
“What are you smiling at?” they mouthed to her as they exchanged the rings, so much closer to being together.
“The kiss,” she replied as they nearly turned away going as red as Shizuku’s dress.
She had to stop herself from laughing as she zoned out again, nothing was important until she could say ‘I do.’
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Ena’s head hurt as she curled up into her bed more. Curling up into the vanilla scented sheets.
Vanilla scented?
Her eyes pinged open as she tried to sit up, cold and naked too.
Fuck.
She looked up and looked down at the person next to her and she wanted to kill herself even more.
Drunken Ena was the most important person she wanted to kill. How the fuck did she wind up fucking Mizuki and then blanking it out?
She wanted to die, her face going bright red as she figured out what she was going to do.
“Who the fuck opened the curtains?” Mizuki mumbled, sitting up as they tried to wake up from their sleepy haze. “Enanan, close the curtains please.”
They closed their eyes and snuggled into the bed before their eyes pinged open. “Ena? Ena? Fuck. Tell me I’m dreaming. Fuck. Fuckity fuck fuck.”
“Yes?”
“You don’t remember anything? Right? You don’t know anything?” they rushed, their voice deeper than normal.
Odd.
But it makes sense somehow, but I’m not sure how.
“No?”
“Good. Forget this happened and can you leave, please?” they begged, pulling up the blanket close to them. Scared shitless.
“Not when we need to sort this out,” Ena argued thanking God she was in her room. “Also, this is my bedroom.”
“So we got home?”
“Yes! Now, if you really want privacy you can leave.”
“Not really...”
“What do you mean by that Amia? What’s wrong?”
“You’ll know when you remember. Fuck, you’re going to hate me.”
“Hate you? How could I hate you?”
“I’ve not been honest.”
“I know, but you have your reason’s. I mean I haven’t been honest about me having a brother and the fact my dad is a famous artist and I got disowned that day. I can’t be upset,” Ena tried to comfort, sitting on the bed near them.
“I’m not going to pry, but I want you to be honest. In fact, I’ve been waiting forever for you to be honest.”
“You’ve known me a month.”
“In person at least,” Ena explained, “But I was talking about it with Airi. You wouldn’t stay near fucked up people unless you were fucked up and whenever K and Yuki accused you of having secrets you froze. Whenever you got called anything gendered you froze up and became quiet. I didn’t want to force you to say anything.”
“Do you know? Well actually, you have to, you will when you remember because of course you will. But, I mean, have you always known?”
“Known what?”
Mizuki looked away, pulling their hair down, making their movements minimal as they looked away. “That I’m. I’m- I’m trans,” they confessed quietly, Ena nearly didn’t hear them. If she hadn’t seen their mouth move, she would’ve thought they’d stayed quiet.
“Okay.”
“Okay? Is that all you have to say?”
“I’m hung over, but also, what do you want me to say. I feel in love with you for your personality,” Ena confessed. “You piss me off a lot and make me want to commit murder, but I like that about you and maybe these aren’t ideal situations to come out, but that doesn’t mean I’m no longer going to like you.”
“Though I lied?”
“Everyone lies, the world is full of lies,” Ena justified. “But I’m not going to pressure you into anything. I’ll leave you be here then and pass you something of yours. We can take it slowly. We don’t have to date or do anything, we can build up emotional intimacy and figure out everything. But you don’t have to do it alone. Not anymore. I’m here for you,” she smiled walking around her room and grabbing a pair of pyjamas, throwing them on.
She never breathed a word of it to anyone. She didn’t have to. She didn’t need to. She kept it to herself as she slowly closed the distance, she walked as far as she could, now Mizuki had to walk the rest.
It was a treacherous journey, but maybe she had eased their burden a little even though it was less than ideal. But fate was strange in that way she supposed as everything to do with Amia was fated in a weird way.
✩⡱
Ena huffed as she looked over at Mizuki sprawled on her bed, sketchbook in hand as they were colouring in a sketch whilst Ena tried to figure out what she wanted to capture.
What emotions she wanted to portray? What she wanted them to wear?
“Amia?” she called out hesitantly, looking over from her desk as they looked up to her. Smiling softly.
“Yes, partner?” they asked, teasing her immensely as of course, Ena’s partner to improve her art with outfits was Mizuki.
“Kill yourself,” she deadpanned as Mizuki laughed beautifully.
“I’m kidding, what do you need help with?”
“Who said I needed help?”
“You never say ‘Amia’ in that tone when you want to piss me off,” they stated before getting off her bed and standing over her shoulder. “Tartan and polka-dots? After all these year’s and you still don’t know what you’re doing?”
“Do you have to bully me?”
“I’m not bullying you,” they scoffed before dragging one of the dining room chairs (yes, Tsukasa knew thst they had borrowed one for Ena’s room) over to the desk to sit side by side. “What do you want for this person?”
“I don’t know,” Ena huffed. “It was meant to be a self portrait-“
“I know you hate yourself, but you can’t hate yourself that much,” Mizuki sighed, moving Ena’s hand from the paper.
They tended to avoid physical contact now a days, only talking more than normal. A soft smile and a teasing lilt to their voice with a soft gaze.
“Talk to me about how you see yourself,” they began, stealing a small little note book and a pen as they began to write words on their hastily.
“What?”
“What? It’s a self portrait but not really since you’re taking artistic and creative liberties with the outfits meaning that is your task,” they deduced. “I’m not asking you to get deep, because not even I can do that. But, the more you understand yourself the better your art will be.”
“You sound like you’re talking from experience there.”
“When I was younger and I denied who I was, everything I did was stunted. It was why I hate looking back at my early Nightcord works. But, what works for me may not work for you of course,” Mizuki reasoned, not looking to Ena properly and away from her once more.
But, it was one brick broken from the wall built between them.
｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡
ﾟ。 Akiyama Mizuki
ﾟ･｡･ﾟ
Mizuki laughed loudly as they took Ena on a trip, they had had some good memories together but soon their first year as room mates was ending and they were still teetering on the edge of something more yet nothing at all.
They were driving together reminiscing on the past such as the Christmas tree debacle where it was an artistic clash and ‘absolutely revolting’ in Airi’s words. But it was theirs.
It contained the decorations Mizuki got when they first realised who Ena was, forcing them to confess that they’d known who she was for a while. She wasn’t angry at them or upset, more resigned about it admittedly.
They couldn’t surprise her much anymore to be honest. She seemed used to their coy acts, their teasing nature, their smiles and words. The way they teased and pretended to be a modelling scout when meeting up with Airi and Shizuku.
She still got riled up occasionally by them, but she teased them back as normal and they stilled argued together over stupid things. One thing was ramen, no one had a clue how it started but it did and it was ‘utterly hilarious’ according to An who filmed the whole thing.
They were very good friends and Ena was as patient as ever, waiting for them to open themselves up. She rarely touched them unless they instigated and took note of everything they mentioned, such as their sister and love of ribbons.
They still suffered with confusion and hatred to themselves from time to time. But they were doing better with Ena by their side.
“So, what’s this about?” Ena asked as they lead her up a hill and under a cherry blossom tree.
The sun was setting, and everything was perfect around them as they smiled at her.
Sunset was perfect, it marked the beginning of night which was the beginning of them but the end of the day. Just like them. The beginning and the end of everything for them.
“Nothing,” they smiled, holding Ena’s hand. “Nothing at all Enanan.”
“You’re scaring me Amia,” Ena replied, trying to smile but she truly was scared.
Cute.
“I just wanted to say thank you, thank you for following and helping me to close the gap between us. It’s not fully closed, but~~~”
“But?”
“I hope this can close it.”
“What do you mean by tha-“
｡ﾟ • ┈ ୨ ♡ ୧ ┈• ﾟ｡
Akiyama Mizuki smiled as they were finally able to kiss Ena. It wasn’t like the stolen kisses they shared under mistletoe or other things. It was something so much tantalising and teasing because they loved one another and had anticipated it the whole day.
Finally, they could say Shinonome Ena was their wife. An impossible feat became possible because of fate and Mizuki loved that.
So did Ena by the way she smiled and held onto them, forgetting to be composed as she rarely initiated physical contact to this day but Mizuki didn’t mind it. It was a distant memory.
When they finally pulled apart, everyone applauded giving enough noise for no one to realise the look of longing on Akito or Airi’s faces as well as no one to hear the couple’s teasing banter.
“I’m suprised you didn’t say I guess so.”
“I wanted this wedding, of course I’d say I do Amia.”
“I asked you the other morning if you loved and all you could say was ‘I guess so.’”
“I was only teasing!”
“That wounded me Enanan.”
“Well I’m sorry then, but you saying-“