Chapter Text
If someone had told 15-year-old Nancy that she would look forward to spending time in Chester Buckley’s eccentric, decked out in floral wallpaper house every month, she would have called them crazy. Not even crazy, she would have called them insane.
Insane to even imply that Nancy wouldn’t be enjoying her time at college, or as a head writer for the New York Times. Insane to imply that Nancy wouldn’t be dating the boy next door, or that she wouldn’t even be thinking about getting married. That had always been what Nancy assumed her life would be like. Go to college. Get a good job. Marry a nice boy, settle down, and have kids. That was what her parents expected, what Hawkins expected. And it was what she expected too.
But that was before the truth. Before the demogorgons and the Upside Down and Vecna. Before her and her family’s life was on the line, and before she had to take it upon herself to protect them. Before Nancy’s whole world shifted on its axis, and before nothing was ever the same again.
Now, at 23, Nancy wanted to laugh at the vision of the future her younger self had. She doesn’t know where she would be if all the fucked up shit that happened to her didn’t happen, but she feels confident enough in herself to know that if her original plan had worked out, she would have been unfulfilled. Something in Nancy had always wanted more, but it wasn’t until she was forced to seek it out did she realize how much she wanted it.
Nancy found herself laughing under her breath at the thought. Never would she be grateful to the Upside Down, but she couldn’t deny that the experience had given her the ability to fight for what she wanted. To fight for herself.
“Jonathan, I have no idea what you are talking about!”
And of course, fight for her friends. Her family.
Nancy turned from where she was washing her hands, watching as Steve tried to understand Jonathan’s new short film idea. She shook her head as Steve got visibly more confused, turning to turn off the tap and drying her hands on the cloth towel beside her on the counter. The boys were supposed to be setting the table, the clock getting closer and closer to 8 PM as Robin’s dinner took longer than she thought it would.
Nancy had known that it wouldn’t have been finished at the 6:30 time Robin had promised, and had watched as Steve hovered over Robin as she tried to make her mother’s famous chicken noodle casserole. Surprisingly, Steve was the one that usually did the cooking when they had these visits, and was not amused to see Robin burn her first attempt. Still, dinner was eventually made, and Nancy tasked the men to get the dinner table ready.
Nancy tried to tune into their arguing, but found herself frowning as she realized that Robin had disappeared. The journalist was positive that she had been there just a second ago, but there was now no blonde in sight.
“Hey,” Nancy interrupted, stopping the men’s bickering. “Where did Robin go?”
Jonathan just shrugged and Steve looked around the room, confused as he clearly did not notice that his best friend was no longer in the room. After he determined that she wasn’t somehow hiding behind something, he shrugged too. “I don’t know, I think she’s in the garage.”
“Why would she be in the garage,” Nancy questioned. Steve just shrugged again. “I’m pretty sure she mentioned something about grabbing some beers.” Nancy gave him a skeptical look but when he didn’t offer any other explanation, took it, rolling her eyes as she walked about the kitchen. Men, she thought, exasperated.
Nancy made her way down the stairs of the basement, trying to repress the shiver that ran up her skin. She always felt weird walking around the house. Normally, Chester was there, and while he was nice, he always left her a little uneasy. He was like Robin but on steroids, never knowing when to stop talking and always pressing a little too far into their business. Nancy was always nice, knowing that he didn’t have to offer up his house for these meetings. Secretly, however, Nancy was grateful whenever he left. Robin had become very good at convincing him to take weekend fishing trips, allowing the four of them the space to spread out in his colorful house. Still, Nancy wanted to be careful as she made her way to the garage.
She walked up to the door of the garage quietly. It was cracked open, a soft light emulating into the dark basement, which confirmed what Steve had said. Nancy pushed the door further to make her way inside and was met with a Robin who was trying to balance 10 glasses of beer.
“Shit, Nancy!” Robin shrieked as she saw the other woman. “You scared me.” Two of the beers in her hands fell to the ground, luckily not breaking, but sending a loud clatter through the room.
“Sorry,” Nancy said, moving to pick up the fallen bottles. “I just came to help. And by the looks of it, you need it.” She raised her eyebrow as Robin tried to keep the other bottles from falling, wobbling as she did so.
“You know you could have just brought a case in,” Nancy said with a laugh. She moved to grab a few more bottles from Robin, giving the blonde the ability to properly hold the rest. Robin shook her head.
“Well I was going to but then one of the cases was half empty, so I thought, it would be better for us to finish that one before bringing in a new one. But then the open one only had three left so I knew that I had to grab the other one. And it didn’t register to me that I could bring in the unopened case and then grab the three extra until they were all in my hands.”
Robin smiled sheepishly, giving Nancy a shrug as the journalist just rolled her eyes. Even after all this time, Robin was still as…well, Robin as ever. Which was another thing that past-Nancy would be surprised by. Just how much she enjoyed Robin’s company. And not just enjoyed it, but craved it.
Nancy thought back to when she first met Robin; back in that dreadful summer where they thought that everything was over just to find out that it was only the beginning. She hadn’t liked the girl then, she knew that. Her only memories of her prior were of a band geek that liked to scoff at things that the more popular people said. She was nobody, someone that preferred to stay in the back of the class so they could keep spewing their sarcastic comments.
But then she was someone. Suddenly, she was Steve’s best friend, and the newest addition to the crazy group they had formed to fight the Upside Down and its monsters. Nancy hadn’t liked her then either. She thought that Robin talked too much and yet didn’t really say anything of importance. And yes, she probably also was jealous of her relationship with Steve, not quite understanding how they could be so close if Steve always insisted that they were platonic.
Then they were sent to investigate Victor Creel together. That was when everything changed for Nancy. As she watched Robin stand up and lie to the warden, begging him for a chance to speak with Victor, Nancy finally understood why Steve was so attached to her. Here was a girl who was unafraid to say what she thought, and found power in being loud and eccentric when society told her to be quiet. It was what Nancy wanted for herself, and what she had been too afraid to find. God, she was even too afraid to talk to her boyfriend at the time, unsure of what would happen if they had the conversation they so desperately needed to have.
But Robin didn’t care. Robin said what she said without worrying about the consequences, and Nancy admired her for it.
That admiration only grew as they worked at the Squawk together. Nancy remembers watching Robin come alive in that studio booth, her mouth moving faster than her brain but still coming off as charismatic and delightful. The way she would smile after Steve messed up with the sound effects, or after Jonathan complimented her on a particular good music pick. The way her eyes would brighten after Nancy complimented her instead, and how she always seemed to play one of the woman’s favorites afterwards.
The way Robin would look so beautiful, sitting there while looking at Nancy, the sun from the large windows coming in to bask her in light. The way it felt as if they were the only two people in the world. The way-
“Nance, you okay?”
Nancy was suddenly drawn back to the moment, realizing that she was still in the dingy garage, standing next to Robin and her uncle’s tiny, white refrigerator.
“Yeah,” she said, shaking her head. “Yeah, sorry. I was just thinking.”
It was an understatement. Nancy had done a lot of thinking about Robin in the past few years and every time it consumed her. She didn’t know if it was the journalist in her, but she swears that she can go right back to every moment and analyze new details and events. The twitch of Robin’s eyebrows. The curl of her smile. The smell of her hair. It didn’t matter what memory, or how Nancy had felt about the woman then. It was always the same.
It was clear that Robin knew this, or at least knew that Nancy was doing more than just getting lost in thought. She always had a way of knowing what Nancy’s brain was up to. More than Jonathan ever was able to, at least. Sometimes, Nancy felt as if they didn’t even need to speak, although Robin would never pass up the opportunity to talk her ear off. Still, a simple glance of their eyes was usually more than enough.
“You sure?” Robin leaned in close, seemingly forgetting about the bottles still precariously held in her hand. Her shoulder brushed Nancy’s, and Nancy had to resist the instinct to take in a breath. It was just your friend, she reminded herself. Stop reacting like this.
But in truth, Robin had never really been her friend. She had gone from a reluctant ally to someone who shared an unmistakable bond with Nancy. And someone, who in the darkest parts of Nancy’s mind, was able to break down the walls Nancy had so carefully put up.
Nancy nodded her head again, hoping that her lie was convincing. She was fine, objectively speaking. Sure, she was resisting the urge to breathe in Robin’s strawberry scented shampoo, but that was fine. It didn’t matter that it made Robin’s hair glow, or that it was the very shampoo Nancy had given her as a gift last Christmas.
The thought of Robin naked and using Nancy’s shampoo ran through Nancy’s mind. Thinking of her as she used her calloused hands to scrub through her hair, maybe even moaning at the relief of it drawing out knots in her now long hair. Thinking of Robin maybe using the shampoo as a body wash if she was out of her usual one. Her foamy hands running over her body. Moving over her shoulders, grazing past her breasts, moving down her waist. Moving down, down, down until she reached her-
“Nance!”
Nancy was once again shocked out of her thoughts and she felt her cheeks warm. Was she really thinking about Robin like that in front of her?
She was quick to try and regain her composure. She took a step back from the blonde, moving her hands to tighten her grip on the beers still within them.
“Sorry,” she said again, “sorry. I guess I’m just in a thoughtful mood today.” She tried to play it off as a joke, but she could tell that Robin was still worried about her. “I’m fine, really.” She was not fine. Both her mind and body were betraying her, and she couldn’t tell which one she hated more.
“We better get back upstairs,” Nancy said, turning to face the door. “I don’t want to leave Steve and Jonathan alone for too long.”
The comment seemed to pull Robin out of whatever she was thinking because she responded quickly. “Oh no, is Jonathan still trying to explain his new film idea? I told him that it wasn’t a good idea to get Steve’s input.”
Nancy let out a laugh and was relieved to find that whatever spell had just been cast over them had been broken. She instantly agreed, laughing again as she made her way up the staircase, earlier tension forced to the back of her mind.
-
Nancy had never considered her sexuality before. She had always known that she liked boys. She knew she blushed when James Cornwall told her she looked pretty in the elementary school halls, and she readily accepted when Elliot Davis asked her to dance at the Snowball. Nancy knew that she was giddy when Steve first asked her out, and felt good when they slept together for the first time. Above it all, Nancy knew that she had loved Jonathan. She had been in love with him, simple and true.
However, though all these “knows,” she also knew that she blushed just as hard when Penelope Mills complimented her dress, or how she couldn’t help but stare at pictures of the models in her mother’s magazines a little too hard. Not with envy, but with something else. Something she couldn’t place, except for when she was with Steve or Jonathan.
Unlike other teens, however, these feelings never threw Nancy off. Perhaps they would have if she wasn’t dealing with interdimensional monsters and baby sisters disappearing, but she would never truly know. It was hard to compare the weight of wondering if you liked girls the same way you liked boys when the world was falling apart and you were in charge of putting it back together.
By now, Nancy didn’t quite care about it. Her year at Emerson had given her the ability to sort through her thoughts and emotions, and helped her realize that it didn’t matter if she liked girls and boys. Her feelings were her feelings, and she was okay with it being subtly in the back of her mind.
What wasn’t subtly in the back of her mind was how fucking hot Robin looked right now.
She wasn’t even doing anything inherently sexy. She was actually doing the opposite, her back hunched while she sat on the living room floor, arguing with Steve about something that Nancy couldn’t remember. But still, the way her hair flowed down her body, and how her shirt clung to her curves. God, Nancy felt like she was going insane.
And okay, yes, Nancy may have a tini, tiny, little crush on Robin. Yes, perhaps she had thought that she was beautiful the first time she saw her, and yes, it was possible that the less than innocent thoughts she had about Robin a few hours earlier were not the first ones and rather a new addition to the long list of fantasies she had created in her head. And perhaps it was even possible that Nancy’s infatuation with Robin was less of a crush and closer to being full on in love, but you know what none of that mattered. Nancy made sure that it didn’t matter. Robin was her friend, first and foremost.
Of course, neither her heart or her body listened to that reasoning.
Nancy’s eyes were fixed on Robin, as they often were these days. It didn’t matter how often she saw her, she still felt like it was never enough.
While the group had stuck to their monthly get togethers for the most part, cancellations always still happened. Whether it be because of Steve’s baseball tournament, or a deadline for Nancy’s next piece, or finals for Jonathan and Robin, the whole group didn’t truly get together as often as they had promised. Still, with Robin and Nancy being less than two hours away, they still planned times to meet with each other. Nancy always tried to ignore the fluttery feeling in her stomach that she got in realizing that Robin was making time for her.
“Hey,” a voice said, starling out of her thoughts of Robing, again. Jesus, this was becoming a pattern.
“Hey,” she responded back, turning to look at Jonathan. He had sat down on the couch next to her, a now warm beer cradled in his hand. He looked over at Robin and Steve for just a moment. Nancy looked over to follow his eyes and couldn’t help it when they caught on Robin again. Fuck, she was so pretty.
Nancy didn’t notice that Jonathan had turned to look at her again. When she finally did manage to drag her eyes away from Robin, she was met with an all too knowing smirk.
“How’s Will,” she asked, hoping that the question would deter Jonathan from asking questions of his own. It seemed to work, a smile curling up on his lips.
“Good,” he said. “Really good. I mean, you know how he flourished last year. Being able to get away from Hawkins. Away from everything that happened.” Nancy remembered. Jonathan had been so excited that Will had been accepted into the Pratt Institute in New York, meaning that they could live together and Will could finally grow outside of being the beginning of the end.
“And I know that it is still hard,” Jonathan continued, “especially with- especially with Jane.” He didn’t have to give any other details then. Once again, Nancy knew. “But he’s coming into his own.”
“You know,” he said, voice dropping as he leaned into Nancy, “I think he even met someone.” Nancy pulled back in surprise. “Really?” Jonathan nodded his head. “He hasn’t told me yet, at least not officially, but there has been a boy coming around the apartment more and Will seems really happy.”
Nancy smiled at Jonathan’s description. She knew that out of all of them, Will was the most scared by everything. To hear how well he was doing made her heart warm.
“How’s Mike doing?” That question made her heart less bright.
Nancy sighed. “He’s doing…fine, I suppose. He is doing well in his classes and he says that he is writing a lot more. I just-” She stopped herself, trying to find the right words. “I just wish he was doing more. I know why he stayed in Hawkins, and I know that Hawkins Community is a good school. And I know that I can’t really be the one to judge,” she sighed again. “I just wish that he could find something that made him excited. I feel like he hasn’t been since, well, everything.”
She looked over at Jonathan again, finding him nodding along. “But I know that he is excited to visit Will in October.” She gave him a smile. “Thanks again, by the way.”
When Mike had told Nancy that Jonathan had invited him during the few days his school has off in October, she was ecstatic. Ever since the defeat of Vecna and El’s death, Mike had shut himself away. When Will and Dustin moved away for college, it got even worse. Despite Max and Lucas attending school with Mike, Nancy knew that it wasn’t the same. She was glad that Mike was trying to reconnect with his friends, especially Will.
“Of course,” Jonathan responded. “I know that Will has missed Mike. And I want Mike to know that he is always welcome.”
They were silent for a moment, both of them thinking about their respective siblings. Nancy thought that perhaps the silence was going to be the end of their conversation, but Jonathan spoke again.
“I also wanted to tell you that I…” he trailed off, and Nancy had to raise an eyebrow at him. “That you what?” Jonathan looked uncomfortable, his hands fidgeting with his beer bottle. Just before Nancy was about to hit his shoulder to get him to tell her, he spoke.
“I sort of met someone too.”
Nancy gasped. “Jonathan Byers,” she said with delight, “you have a girlfriend?”
Jonathan looked embarrassed and shot a look over at Robin and Steve, trying to determine if they heard or not. When he deduced that they hadn’t, he looked back over at Nancy shyly.
“She’s not my girlfriend. We’ve only been on like three dates.” Nancy still smiled. “Well, who is she?” Now it was Jonathan’s turn to smile, and Nancy could tell how much he liked her just from his facial expression alone. “Her name is Samantha,” he said, “and she is a makeup artist for the new film I’m working on. I met her at the start of the year, and, yeah.” He stopped talking and Nancy could see the blush that was rising on his cheeks.
“I just wanted to tell you before Mike had the chance to. He probably won’t even meet her, but just in case. You know that he can’t keep a secret, especially not about something like this, and I didn’t want you to not hear it from me and-”
“Jonathan,” Nancy interrupted, putting her hand on his shoulder. “I’m happy for you, I promise. She must be a really special girl if she can get you this happy, and that’s all I want for you. For you to be happy.”
Nancy wasn’t sure if ex-girlfriends were normally supposed to act like this, but she supposed that nothing in her life was normal. Both her ex-boyfriends were currently in this room, along with the woman at the center of all her fantasies. She was sure that being happy that your ex-non-fiance fit comfortably along the long list of strangeness in her life.
Jonathan gave her a smile and nodded his head, the tension leaving his shoulders. He looked over at Robin and Steve again. Nancy saw his eyebrows tilt together in thought before he turned back to her, a different kind of smile now graced on his face.
“You know I just want that for you too right? I want you to be happy.” He snuck a glance at the pair still on the floor, or more accurately, Nancy realized, at Robin. “No matter how that happiness comes to be.” There was a new shine in his eyes and for one of the first times in Nancy's life, she struggled to find words to respond.
Nancy felt caught. This was the first time her feelings for Robin was recognized outside of herself. Hell, even she didn’t really recognize her feelings for Robin, preferring them to stay in the “investigate it later” part of her mind that will never truly come to fruition. To hear Jonathan speak about it, even subtly, made a blush rise to her face.
Before she could say anything, Jonathan rose from the couch. Nancy watched, still wide eyed, as he crossed over to Steve and Robin, separating them from where they were tangled up in what Nancy assumed to be a fake fight.
“Alright big guy,” he said, patting Steve on the shoulder. “Time for bed.”
“What no,” Steve protested, making it clear to everyone in the room that he was definitely drunk. “Yeah, come on,” Jonathan said, lifting him up. He raised his eyebrows at Nancy, his expression saying “how did I get into this mess” but he pushed Steve towards their rooms without complaint. Left alone in the living room was just Nancy and Robin, and the fact made Nancy’s face flush deeper.
She looked up to find Robin already staring at her. She was sitting up on her knees and Nancy quickly tried to expel the image of what else she could be doing on her knees. She’s your friend, she reminded herself for what felt like the thousandth time that night. Your totally, completely, one hundred percent, platonic friend.
Robin opened her mouth to say something, but Nancy stood before she could. She was exhausted and would have to drive back to Boston the next day. She also couldn’t stand to look at Robin any longer and have all the thoughts of what it would be like to kiss her plague her mind.
“I’m going to head to bed too.” It came out stiff and awkward and Nancy internally cringed. Robin’s mouth closed and her face seemed to drop, a slight frown tugging down the corner of her mouth. Instead of focusing on what that could mean, Nancy quickly walked out of the living room and towards the guest bedroom that had been determined as hers.
-
Nancy got ready for bed quickly. She moved into the bathroom attached to the room fast, using the bathroom and brushing her teeth, working to get the beer taste off her tongue. She worked to take all the pins out of her hair. It was growing out again, it reaching just above her shoulders, and she was debating about cutting it short again. Once she had decided that her hair problem could wait until her long drive back, she rushed back into her room to change into her pajamas, the soft white long-sleeved set perfect for the slightly chilly September air.
Just as she slipped into the outdated duvet cover and sheets of the bed, she heard a knock at the door.
“Nancy?”
It was Robin, because of course it was.
She felt her breath stop, her mind whirling as she tried to figure out why Robin was visiting her room this late. It was just past midnight, but it felt later, as if the world was closing in around them. Robin had also never visited her before, not in the year that they had been meeting up like this.
“Are you still awake?” Robin’s voice came through the door. “Nancy?” Her name being said again awoke Nancy from her trance. Nancy realized that she was asking for permission to come in, and quickly worked to answer.
“Come in!”
There was a beat of silence and then Robin slowly pushed open the door. She was dressed for bed as well, although her set was the complete opposite of Nancy’s. The black and navy blue spotted pattern of her pajamas were stark against her bare skin, her shorts showing the expanse of her legs. Embarrassly, Nancy had to pull her eyes away.
“Are you not cold,” she found herself asking. If it were anyone else Nancy would be afraid that Robin would take it as a criticism, but Robin just smiled, hearing the amusement in the journalist’s voice. “Are you not hot,” she fired back, smirking. Nancy rolled her eyes but they quickly came back to stare at Robin.
She seemed nervous, but why Nancy didn’t know. She didn’t even know why she was here.
“Did you need something?”
The question seemed to shock Robin out her thoughts, and she shook her head. “No, I mean, yes,” she fumbled. “I just wanted to talk to you. I thought you seemed upset when you were talking to Jonathan earlier and I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Something in Nancy’s chest grew hot at the thought of Robin paying attention to her. Paying close enough to notice that Nancy was upset.
“I was just talking about Mike.” She sighed as she said it, walking back over to her pulled back covers to sit down on the bed. She motioned to the bed, offering Robin to sit. The woman hesitated for a moment before walking over, sitting herself at the edge of it. “I was saying how I wished he could find something that he was passionate about. I obviously understand how much he has lost. We all miss El. And I know that it isn’t the same for him, but I just want him to find that spark again.”
“Sorry, that is such a depressing take,” Nancy said after noticing how sad Robin’s face had gotten. “I didn’t mean to-”
“No,” Robin interrupted, shifting just a bit closer to Nancy. “Don’t apologize. I get it, I would be worried too. I mean, I am. Will’s told me a bit about Mike pulling away.”
Right. Nancy forgot that Robin and Will were close. Their friendship had formed during the days leading up to the final battle, and she had to admit, she hadn’t understood it at first. She still didn’t even understand Steve and Dustin’s friendship, so the thought of Robin and Will becoming friends was too crazy for her to think about. That was until she learned the truth about Will. Until she learned the truth about Robin.
-
Nancy had assumed that Robin was straight, which may have somewhat come from her idea that she and Steve were together. So now as she was learning that Robin was in fact a complete lesbian and in a long-term relationship with a woman, Nancy’s world was shifting.
“You…and Vickie Dunne? The candy striper?” Nancy asked, utterly confused. She tried to recall if Robin had ever talked about her and could only come up with a few instances. But she supposed that if she were hiding a secret relationship, a secret queer relationship, she would be hesitant to share details as well.
Robin nodded, her hands moving together, showing her nerves. “Yes. Me. And Vickie. We're together. Like in dating, together. Not that we aren’t together in other ways, because of course she was my friend and we are together a lot, but I guess we are now dating when we see each other. So yeah, like I said, together.”
It was summer, the sticky July air surrounding Nancy, Robin, Steve, and Jonathan as they sat on the hill that oversaw Hawkins. All of them except Steve were leaving for college in just a few weeks, and Robin had declared that she wanted to tell them all something important. Or at least, Nancy and Jonathan, the blonde admitting that Steve already knew. The fact that Steve knew didn’t surprise Nancy. Rather, the most surprising thing was Robin’s secret. Nancy never would have predicted this.
Something twisted in Nancy’s stomach as Robin continued to talk about Vickie, answering all the questions Jonathan asked her. He was obviously supportive, asking her if Vickie would want to come over to the barbeque that the Wheelers were hosting before Nancy left for Emerson. She wanted to glare at him for inviting her, except she couldn’t think of the reason why. She was happy for Robin, she was, and Vickie had been in a few of her classes in school and always seemed nice. So why was she feeling sick to her stomach now?
“Nance?” It was Steve, looking over at her in confusion, obviously by her reaction, or lack there of, to Robin’s answers. Nancy shook out of her stupor and looked over to where Robin and Jonathan were looking at her. She could see the fear that was still present in Robin’s, and she felt even worse for making her feel that way.
“That sounds great,” she said, putting on a smile she hoped none of them could tell was strained. “We would love to have her and get to know her better.” She nodded her head as if it would convince herself that it was true, and she just hoped that the other three would be convinced. The boys seemed to accept her answer and turned back to Robin, waiting for her to share more about Vickie. When she didn’t immediately begin to speak, Steve took it upon himself to share details about having to wait for them to get together. It was “agony” as he put it.
Instead of paying attention to what her best friend was saying, Robin was fixated on Nancy. The journalist tried to widen her smile, hoping that it would show her support.
She knew that her odd behavior wasn't a judgement about Robin. Rather, it was judgment on herself. For some reason, the fact that Robin was into women had changed everything, and she had no idea why.
-
While Nancy had originally been confused about her reaction to Robin coming out, it was more for a lack of wanting to know then not actually knowing. Her time at Emerson let her think more about her feelings, and how they correlated to other ones she felt with girls.
Of course, knowing that she liked a particular girl was different than just any. Robin had become someone who could make Nancy blush just thinking about, and it had been torture. She didn’t say anything, obviously. For one, they were friends (as Nancy has continuously reminded herself). Secondly, Robin was in a relationship at the time. Nancy was many things, but a homewrecker was not one of them. Even after Robin and Vickie broke up, Nancy still didn’t say anything, knowing that the likelihood of Robin feeling that way about her was low. Just because she was a girl didn’t mean that Robin had to like her that way. They were friends. Just friends.
“Yeah,” Nancy said, realizing that she had probably been quiet for too long. “Yeah, he has been pulling away. Jonathan invited Mike over to his and Will’s apartment for their fall break, so I’m hoping that they can reconnect. And I’m hoping that Will can get him out of his shell. I think it would do him some good.”
Robin nodded along, shifting on the bed some more as if she was trying to get comfortable. “Well, if I know anything, it’s that no one can refuse Will Byers.” She and Nancy laughed, knowing that it was the truth.
They fell into a comfortable silence, letting their laughter fizzle out. Robin shifted again, and Nancy couldn’t help but let her gaze fall onto her legs once more. God, how were they so smooth? Nancy thought about what it would be like to touch them. To run her hands up the pale, clean skin. What it would be like to press kisses up Robin’s thigh, moving closer and closer to the place that Nancy desperately wanted to get her mouth on.
“You and Jonathan looked pretty close,” Robin said suddenly, breaking the silence. “Is there any chance of a rekindling…there?” There was something off in her voice that Nancy couldn’t place. It took her a moment to even register the questions before quickly shaking her head.
“No, no, definitely not. Umm, we’re just friends.” She gave a small smile. “Besides, he actually told me that he met someone.” Robin gasped and moved so that she was hunched on her knees, practically on all fours as she gaped at Nancy. “No way, Jonathan “I want to focus on my movies” Byers met someone?” Nancy laughed at her wording, knowing that it was true. “Apparently! She’s a makeup artists and is really nice and will probably understand the strange metaphors in whatever movie he makes next.”
“Probably,” Robin agreed. She still looked shocked and shook her head in disbelief.
“So yeah,” Nancy continued, “there will definitely be no rekindling of any kind.” And Nancy should have left it there. She should have told Robin that she was tired and had to go to bed. She should have kept her mouth shut.
“Besides-” Nancy said instead, her brain not catching up to her mouth until the word was already out in the open. Robin’s eyes widened at the word. Nancy didn’t even have to say anything else for Robin to know what she meant.
“Wait, does the great Nancy Wheeler also have a mysterious someone?” It was said with the intention to tease, but Nancy could still hear the genuine question in Robin’s voice. Nancy was quick to look down at the sheets, suddenly finding it very hard to look at the other woman.
“No, I- no. I don’t.” Nancy internally cursed at herself for stuttering, knowing that it was a dead giveaway. She was always confident, and yet when it came to her feelings for Robin, she suddenly felt like she was back to being that 15-year-old girl that knew nothing of the world.
“Yes you do!” Robin shrieked, pushing even closer to Nancy. When Nancy looked up again, she sucked in a breath when she realized that their faces were only a few inches apart. She could practically feel Robin’s breath on her face.
“Who is he?”
The question came out soft this time, a stark contrast to the loudness Robin had just exhibited; the loudness that she usually exhibits. It was as if she too had realized just how close the two of them were, although she made no effort to put any distance between them.
Nancy found herself stuck on the question. There was no “he” or no someone. It was only Robin. It was only ever Robin.
“It’s not-” Nancy found herself whispering back, not knowing where the sudden bound of confidence came from. She cut herself off, but she could see that Robin’s thoughts were turning. “Can you tell me about him,” Robin asked, eyes boring into Nancy’s. So much so that Nancy had to take a break from staring at them. As if out of her control, she found herself fixated on Robin’s lips instead. She could see that they were chapped and dry and looked as if they had just escaped a battle with Robin’s teeth but she didn’t care. Couldn’t care. They looked perfect.
“She,” Nancy found herself admitting as she looked back into Robin’s cool, blue eyes, "is perfect.” Nancy let out a breath, suddenly finding it extremely hot in the room. And maybe it was because she was here with Robin, or maybe it was because she was finally being honest. She didn’t know. She just knew that now that the truth was out, she couldn’t stop.
“She’s brave, and smart, and witty. She loves to read and her music taste is strange but good. She knows four languages and loves to insult people in them. She always knows how to make me laugh or how to help me cry if I need it.”
Robin was staring at her, eyes wide as they shifted across Nancy’s face. Nancy was pretty sure about what she was looking for, but Nancy had no room in it to confirm or deny. She was pretty sure that Robin already knew the truth.
“She talks too much and too fast but I love it because I’m always interested in what she has to say. She makes me think in a different way, lets me expand what I know. She’s never once made me feel crazy for wanting what I want, or for not living up to people’s expectations. She’s always there for when I-”
“Nancy.”
Nancy realized that her eyes had shifted back down to the bed and was quick to bring them back up to Robin’s. Her name had come out as a breath, almost too quiet for her to hear. As if Robin had sent her name through a light breeze, hoping that it was rustling Nancy’s hair so that she would know it was from her.
“Yeah?” Nancy swallowed thickly, suddenly afraid of what Robin might say. She was too busy thinking about what possibilities that she had almost missed the glance Robin had taken at her lips. Almost.
Robin was so close now, and before Nancy could think about what she was doing, she moved up so that her lips could lightly brush with Robin’s. It couldn’t even be counted as a kiss. It was so brief and slight that if Robin pulled away right then Nancy would probably convince herself that it didn’t happen.
Robin didn’t pull away.
Instead, Nancy suddenly felt Robin’s lips on hers, real and present.
The kiss was slow, as if Robin was afraid that Nancy would be the one to pull away. Her lips were rough and Nancy could feel the unevenness that came from when the blonde would chew on her lips. Somehow that feeling made the kiss better. Made it more real.
That thought seemed to kickstart Nancy because she suddenly pushed deeper into the kiss, moving so that her hands could grab onto Robin’s waist. Robin let her pull her down, making it so that she was now sitting on Nancy’s lap as their lips stayed connected. With the new closeness, Nancy deepened the kiss, letting out a sigh that was swallowed by Robin’s mouth. Nancy used this opportunity to slip her tongue into Robin’s mouth, and couldn’t help but smirk after Robin let out a moan.
Robin’s arms slowly came up to sit over Nancy’s shoulders, her hands tangling in her hair. Nancy continued to press kisses into Robin’s mouth, letting her tongue get bolder and bolder as she nibbled at the bottom of the other woman’s lips.Robin pulled Nancy closer, as if she was trying to carve herself into Nancy’s skin. Nancy wouldn’t be surprised. Even though they were practically as close as they could get, Nancy still felt like it wasn’t close enough.
Nancy didn’t know how much time had passed before they pulled away, gasps leaving both of them as they tried to catch their breaths. Nancy wanted to speak, wanted to say something, anything. Anything to try and understand what had just happened. But as she opened her mouth, an involuntary moan came out instead.
Robin started to pepper kisses down Nancy’s neck, sucking on bits of skin before soothing it with her tongue. She ran over the edge of Nancy’s jaw, the slope of her neck, the angles of her collarbones. Nancy was helpless to it. Her hands moved across the expanse of Robin’s back before they found solace in Robin’s hair, tugging at the roots before trailing back down the long locks. Robin hummed against her skin and it sent shivers of pleasure down Nancy’s spine.
Robin made her way back up to Nancy’s face slowly, not leaving any inch of skin untouched by her kisses. Nancy let out another gasp as Robin bit particularly hard near her earlobe, no doubt leaving a mark. She tugged Robin’s hair, trying to communicate just how much she was loving it.
“Nance,” she whispered, and fuck, she sounded so hot. She sounded exactly how Nancy felt, horny and high on the feeling of their lips pushed together.
“Fuck,” Nancy moaned in return, moving Robin’s head so that she could crash their lips together again. These kisses were different from the last ones. These were hard and fast and hot. The two women couldn’t get enough of each other, and part of Nancy was convinced that this must be a dream. Or perhaps a vision from Vecna, a sign that he never truly went away, because how could something this perfect exist if it wasn’t meant to kill her?
The kisses seemed to be never ending, and Nancy didn’t know how she was supposed to live after knowing what it felt like to have Robin in her arms. It didn’t matter that they were in her weird uncle’s guest room, or that Jonathan and Steve were asleep just a few doors down. No, nothing but Robin could matter when Nancy had her like this.
Somehow, their kisses eventually slowed, going from heated open mouthed kisses to soft, slow pecks. Nancy was still breathing heavily, her heart feeling like it was rattling around in her chest. She was hesitant to open her eyes, fearing that when she did she would realize that it was just an illusion. But when Robin’s lips didn’t return to hers, she knew that she had to face her.
Robin looked completely disheveled. Her hair was tangled up and her pajamas were skewed off of her shoulders. Her whole face was red, her lips puffy, her eyes almost black from how large her pupils were. She look utterly fucked out.
She looked beautiful.
Nancy knew that she probably looked no better. She could feel the heat on her face and was all too aware of Robin’s weight on her thighs. Still, she kept Robin close, refusing to loosen the grip she had on the other woman’s waist.
“Hi.”
It was whispered by Robin, soft and low. The complete opposite of how Robin usually spoke, so quiet and so simple. And yet, it was perfect for this moment.
“Hi,” Nancy parroted back. Robin smiled at her response and Nancy couldn’t help but match her, her lips up turning into a grin. It seemed as if that simple hello was enough to break whatever tension was in the room, turning the scene back into something both women knew.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Robin giggled, pressing her forehead against Nancy’s.
“Really?” Nancy couldn’t help but be surprised. Sure, she could imagine Robin being attracted to her. Nancy knew that she was pretty. But to be wanting, lusting over Nancy in the same way Nancy had been to her was something that the journalist couldn’t believe.
Still, Robin nodded, smile growing wider. “I’ve always thought you were gorgeous, Nance.” She dragged her hands down Nancy’s shoulders and arms, hands following down to her finger tips before coming back up to repeat the path. “And that was before I realized how unbelievably badass you were. I mean, after I saw you with a gun for the first time, whew,” she let out a breath. “Nothing could have stopped me from wanting you.”
“But-“ Nancy started, confusion among her glee setting in. “You were with Vickie.” Robin nodded, expression becoming more serious, although her smile didn’t leave her eyes. “And I loved her, I did. But after everything, the Upside Down and Vickie and I breaking up, you were the only person I wanted to talk to. The only person I wanted to share this with.”
It was a heart stopping confession and something that Nancy didn’t know how to process. She had always been awkward around love, something she had unfortunately been gifted from her parents. She had never been good at expressing it, and was always annoyed that it was a trait she shared with her brother. “Look at the Wheeler siblings,” she was sure someone would say, “never got love and now they don’t know how to give it.”
But for the first time, Nancy didn’t feel overwhelmed by this thought. She knew that she didn’t need to perform for Robin or admit something that wasn’t entirely true. Robin just wanted her, the good and the bad. Nancy knew that she could be herself with Robin.
“Besides,” Robin continued, likely knowing that Nancy wasn’t going to directly respond to her confession. “It’s not like you weren’t getting action too. Let’s not forget that you dated both our lovely boys down the hall.”
It was silent for a beat before both women burst out laughing. Their foreheads were still pressed together and Nancy could feel Robin’s laughter as if it were her own. Never in a million years would Nancy have thought that this is where she would end up, but now that she was, she wouldn’t change it for anything. All she needed now was Robin, knowing that her love and support was enough for her.
“Now I just want to be with you.”
It was incredibly cheesy and something that Nancy would probably cringe at saying later. But right now it was perfect. Robin’s eyes shined and Nancy could feel herself growing more and more in love the longer she looked at her.
“Nancy Wheeler,” Robin said smiling, dipping her head down and capturing Nancy’s lips within her own once more. “Still always so full of surprises.”