Chapter Text
Sometimes people make jokes. Langdon knows that, and he doesn't usually have major problems with knowing whether something is or isn't a joke. Especially with Mel. Even with her trickier jokes, he's normally able to get them. He's actually incredibly proud of that skill, if he's being perfectly honest. Which is why he feels completely out of his mind right now as he stares at her from in front of the nurse's station as she talks to a patient inside one of the exam rooms. He jumps when the sound of Dana's voice is suddenly right next to him.
“Something the matter with Mel's patient?”
“What? Why?”
“I know you like staring, but you look like you're worried someone's about to attack her.”
The concern in her voice makes him finally turn to face her, his own voice coming out gentle but firm.
“No, that's not- it's fine. There's nothing to worry about there.”
Dana's shoulders relax, a smirk overtaking her face now.
“Trouble in paradise?”
“Nothing like that either.”
“Then quit lollygagging and pick up another patient.” One of her hands raises to flick her finger against his forehead. “Had me worried for nothing, mister.”
He pouts and pretends to hold his forehead in exaggerated faux pain.
“And for that cardinal sin, I'll find a way to pick up two.”
She snorts.
“That's what I like to hear. Now, shove off.”
“Yes, ma'am.”
As Langdon heads toward an exam room, Mel walks out of the one she was in, smiling at him as she looks up from her tablet. He nods, attempting to smile back, but has a feeling he doesn't pull it off as well as he'd hoped when her face falls into her curious look. Sighing, he motions that he needs to get to a patient, and she nods back before he turns away. He has a feeling that if she hadn't realized something was up with him before, then she certainly does now. Which might be for the best, because he needs her to set him straight. He needs to know what that joke was, and what it meant, because he is pretty sure that he has been a man on the edge for days now.
It all started on Thursday night.
—
Thursday Night - Three Days Earlier
It has been fifty-three days since they'd started dating, and tonight he and Mel were at her apartment after a very long shift, and a very nice shared shower. They're in her bed, him sitting up with his back against the headboard, her head on his lap, talking and giggling absently about a couple they had worked on today who had been not at all reluctant to admit exactly how their bedroom exploits had landed them in the emergency department.
In detail.
Langdon licks his lips.
“I was impressed, frankly.”
“It's always good to be yourself.”
He smirks and tugs on a lock of her slightly damp hair as she huffs out a little laugh at her own joke.
“As I was saying, usually they are very hush hush about it, and it makes our jobs harder.”
Mel hums softly, her eyes falling closed.
“True. And it was nice that they weren't ashamed.”
“Exactly. They were clearly comfortable with each other, and probably have no problem saying whatever they want.”
She makes a quiet noise of agreement.
“You can fuck me while I'm sleeping.”
His heart stops.
His heart stops, and his ears are ringing, and his chest is tight, and he cannot breathe as he tries to process the sounds that Mel's mouth had just made. Langdon's voice cracks.
“Right…”
Before he can come up with more words, some form of sentence or…anything, her eyes shoot open, and she looks up at him with a sense of urgency.
“Do you think Princess would let me borrow her air fryer so I can see if it would be worth getting one?”
Langdon is going to die. He chokes on air for half a moment, and then clears his throat.
“What did you wanna try making?”
“Lot's of stuff, but people always say they make really crispy French fries.” Her brow furrows. “Would it be weird to ask to borrow it, though?”
Silence. He's still…processing this subject change.
“What? No, no, Princess loves sharing her shit. I don't think she'd be talking it up so much if she didn't want people interested in getting one for themselves. As long as you give it back on time and in working condition, I bet she'd be thrilled to get the extra use out of it.”
“That's a good point, I'll ask her next time I see her then.”
And then she just…keeps talking to him, the subject never returning to…
It had to have been a joke, right?
—
Return to Three Days Later
Somnophilia. Dormaphilia.
Langdon had googled it. He had thought that maybe he was missing some sort of context to make the joke make sense. It all made sense in theory, the idea of people being into having sex with someone sleeping or into someone having sex with them while they sleep, and it figured that there was a way to do it consensually. Maybe that was all Mel was saying. Maybe she was just giving an example of something that that couple they had been talking about might want. Maybe that was the joke? Is that a joke? Does it count as a joke?
What the fuck is a joke?
The word has lost all meaning.
Now, all Langdon has been able to think about is one very slight possibility. The very slight possibility that, now that he allows himself to consider it, would actually be his first assumption with how well he knows Mel.
How well he thinks he knows Mel.
Does he know Mel?
What is a Mel?
“You okay?”
Langdon jumps as Mel's voice cuts across the silence of his living room. He looks up at her across from him on the sofa, their legs tangled, empty bowls of finished ramen sitting on the coffee table. It's only then that he realizes that the credits are playing on the episode of The Golden Girls that they were watching. It was the one where Rose's boyfriend died of a heart attack in her bed. Which wasn't making him think of-
“Can we please have a conversation?”
The way he says these words is startling if the way Mel's eyes go wide is any indication. She nods.
“Yeah, what- what's wrong?”
“I think- I think I thought that you were gonna ask me about how I was acting earlier, but then you didn't, and I just keep…”
He trails off, his pointer finger making a spiral at his head. She frowns.
“Oh. Sorry, I-I figured you'd tell me if you really needed to talk about it. You usually do.”
A broken laugh. Langdon runs a hand down his face as he chuckles darkly.
“Fuck me. Yeah, yeah, you're right, I usually do. Don't- please don't be sorry, don't mean that. You don't have anything to be sorry for. It's me.”
He feels a hand run up his leg and squeeze his knee, and raises his head to see her staring at him thoughtfully.
“What's wrong?”
“I…what did you mean when you said the words, ‘You can fuck me while I'm sleeping’ the other day? Was that a joke?”
Mel seems to freeze in front of his eyes. Her eyes are wide again. Moments pass. And then suddenly her brow furrows.
“How would that be a joke?”
“I don't- like maybe you were saying that that couple was pretty extreme so they'd probably be into- I don't-”
“It's not a very good joke.”
Langdon huffs.
“That's why I- I thought maybe I missed something, or you were just very clever, I don't know… But, wait- so you weren't joking?”
“We were talking about how they were comfortable with each other, and they didn't have a problem saying what they wanted, and how nice that was, so I just thought…I would say what was on my mind.”
“Well, that was what I thought after I really thought about it, but then you changed the subject…”
Silence. Mel licks her lips.
“I thought I made you uncomfortable, so I moved on.”
“That's why I thought you were joking.”
“Oh.”
More silence.
“I looked it up. When I thought I was missing something, I looked it up.”
“Oh?”
“Basically, somnophilia is when you like being the awake one, and dormaphilia is when you like being the asleep one.”
She raises her brows.
“Huh. I did not know the word for the second one. I've never actually looked them up.”
“No?”
“I mean I've- I've thought about it, especially when-”
“When?”
His strangled voice makes her pause. She bites her lip.
“Sometimes when I'm watching you sleep, you're just so…peaceful.”
He swallows.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. And sometimes when I'm just…really tired, and I can't keep my eyes open, I think about what it would be like, or like…to wake up with you inside me.”
“And that's why you said what you said. You weren't joking.”
She shakes her head. Worries at her lip again.
“But just because you ask for something, it doesn't mean you get it, so I just thought you weren't-”
“Mel, I would try just about anything for you.”
Mel's eyebrows raise.
“Oh?”
“There are things I have never even dreamed of that I am pretty sure I would say yes to just at the idea of it being done with you. But…”
“But?”
“Would you do it first?”
It's her turn to swallow.
“You want-”
“I want you to fuck me while I'm sleeping. Would you- do you…want that?”
“Yes.”
The way she says that one word absolutely destroys him. He whispers.
“Come here.”
Mel maneuvers herself to crawl on top of him, straddling his legs as he pulls her into a heated kiss. He cradles her face as he sticks his tongue down her throat, her little whimpers driving him wild as she claws at his shoulders. When they part to gasp for breath, her forehead rests against his own, and she pants.
“Are you sure?”
“Absolutely. Absolutely, yes.”
Her smile is perfect.
She's so perfect.
Mel kisses him once more, and it doesn't take them long to move things to the bedroom for the night.