Work Text:
Relationships. One of the most complicated topics to talk about because there’s only one undeniable truth about them. Relationships are hard.
You can think of them as pain or as relief because they can be both, and that’s what makes them dangerous. In fact, a good relationship is both, moments where you accidentally hurt each other and moments where the other’s presence feels as warm as a hug.
It needs to feel real.
Relationships are complicated because they involve more than one person, and people are never easy, that’s another undeniable truth. Sometimes you can’t even understand yourself, so understanding others it’s out of the equation.
You can try hard and still be unsuccessful. That’s why, sometimes, you have to lose something to understand its value.
There’s not always the need to reach that point, it’s better when you can realize it before it’s too late. That’s what happened to Minho and Seungmin, their relationship was just a strand away from breaking, but destiny wanted to keep them together.
No, not destiny. Minho was the one who did it.
It was easy to tell how the boys were too different, to think there was no return after reaching the breaking point, but the reality quickly stepped in. The truth showed up, and it was far from the expectations. They grew closer.
The fight was a shift in their relationship, a good one.
∞
It’s freezing cold.
The winter arrived quite late, but the cold took its realm one day to another. Snow had fallen the night before, leaving its trace into the next morning without forces trying to stop it, only a hint of sun reaching the ground.
If we gather all that, we can get two things. The first of them, it’s going to be a long day, and the second, it already is.
Minho has been frowning all day, the cold lingering in his body even though he has been inside for a couple of hours. He dressed warmly, but, as the day was passing by, he noticed it wouldn’t be enough. Well, it isn’t.
His eyes are drifting to his fluffy jacket every now and then, just seeing the blue shining in between the dark coats. He is working now, so he can’t wear his comfortable jacket. He’s cold.
His clothes should have been enough to keep him warm, but the door opening every few minutes makes it impossible.
See? There it goes again.
The door opens, letting in a couple accompanied by a gust of cold wind, and Minho shivers in his place. He is behind the counter, so he has to deal with the couple approaching him with wide smiles and lovely eyes. The sight almost makes him throw up.
Minho hates love.
Not really, he hates the idea of love. He hates the love displayed in the dramas or the movies, he hates the conventional love, and that couple is all over it. It’s disgusting, but, at least, they have the decency to keep his flirting away while interacting with him.
“Hello, welcome to our café.” Minho greets them with the fakest smile he has ever worn, just because of the policy of the place.
“Hi!” the girl smiles at him, his boyfriend already looking for the drinks. “What do you recommend?”
Minho looks at them for a second, astonished thanks to the sudden question, but that’s enough to see how the girl is really paying attention to him and not asking just because. He also notices how the boy is not even a little interested in the drinks, which leads him to think that all this is the girl’s idea.
“Umm… We have special winter drinks, and they are very good.” Minho finally says, smiling more gently, more real, just because the girl is actually pretty lovely. He likes it when customers ask for recommendations, but he likes it more when they actually listen to them, and the girl does just that.
“I will have one of those then, not too much coffee please.” she smiles, and Minho finds himself nodding with a soft gaze when he sees how the girl tugs at his boyfriend’s sleeve just to convince him to order the same as her.
Yeah, maybe he has judged them wrongly. He doesn’t hate their love that much, and maybe he finds them cute. He will never admit that.
“It will be ready in ten minutes or so.” Minho announces before the couple goes to find where to sit.
Then, a little sigh abandons his lips. Sure, the winter drinks are tastier, but also harder than the normal ones, he doesn’t really like making them. Why does he recommend them? He gets extra pay when he sells one of them, and he really needs the money.
Minho has to pay for his studies, so he can’t contemplate the option of being lazy, the extra pay is really needed. The truth is that he is not short on money, even though his relationship with his parents is not good, they send him money. His family is kind of rich, but he isn’t. Maybe they send him money, but it’s not really enough to pay for everything.
He needs to pay for his studies, the house, and other things he needs, such as food and clothes. That’s why he is working his ass off while studying. That and the fact that he prefers to use his own money rather than his parents, but he is not really dumb, he does use it when he needs to.
That’s how life is.
The drinks are being made without paying much attention, Minho has done plenty of them for the past week so it’s not that much of a trouble. The door opens again, the steps and the voices letting him know that it’s a group of at least four persons. Since he is the only one attending, that’s a hassle.
Usually, he doesn’t work alone, but the evening shift is all his. It always is, and it’s never a problem because not many people walk into the café, but it’s all different during holidays.
He sighs, not turning around until the drinks are finished. Then, he faces the new clients, and he was not wrong, six teenagers are arguing on what to order. Minho doesn’t like teenagers, not when they came all together.
“Just a minute.” he speaks, leaving the counter to find the table where the couple sat earlier.
The drinks are soon in front of them, that earning Minho a sweet smile from the girl and a subsequent glare from the boy. Minho feels the need to laugh out loud, sure that the boy thinks he’s flirting with his girlfriend when he smiles back.
It’s not like that, Minho can tell the girl is just a soft person, someone that makes people feel at ease with a smile. That it’s such a gift, something that everyone would like to have. If the boy can’t see it, that’s his problem. Minho just walks away, leaving them alone and facing the teenagers.
“Do you already know what you want?” Minho asks as soon as he is behind the counter again.
One of the boys nods and, as it seems, he is the designed one to order for all of them because he proceeds to list all the drinks they want. None of them are winter drinks, but Minho hasn’t the patience to convince them, so he just lets the money slip away from his hands, nodding.
While he’s occupied doing the requested drinks, his phone buzzes in his pocket. It takes only a couple of seconds to check the surroundings, making sure no one is waiting for him before pulling out the device.
The screen is lighted up with a single message, but another one follows the first before Minho can even attempt to read or open the first one.
Silly Boy
HEY, MIN!
Are you still working?
Oh yes, it’s Seungmin. The younger has now the habit to call him Min, and it’s not like he hates it, but it’s strange. Yeah, just that. Seungmin likes to tease him with every single thing, so he obviously couldn’t stop calling Minho like that when he found the older frowning in confusion.
That’s the principal reason why Minho changed Seungmin’s contact name from Annoying Boy to Silly Boy.
Me
Yeah, why?
Minho types fast, quickly shoving the phone in his pocket in order to walk the drinks to the group of friends. When he is behind the counter again, he checks the chat, finding that he has been left on read. He stares at the screen, blinking twice while frowning.
But it’s not like he can question the thing for a long time because the door opens again, forcing him to leave the phone. He looks up, the surprise appearing in his wide eyes when he sees a boy walking in. Not a boy, Seungmin.
“What are you doing here?” the older questions, still dumbfounded.
“Can’t I?” Seungmin asks in return.
“No. I mean, yes, but…”
Seungmin laughs, amused at the way Minho doesn’t seem to be able to speak properly, that earning him a glare from the older when he can finally process that Seungmin just texted him because he wanted to… surprise him?
“I wanted to check on you, I know a lot of people have been coming at this hour lately.” Seungmin says.
Oh, he was worried.
“I can handle it, Kim Seungmin.” Minho shots back, but there’s no bad intention behind his words because he secretly appreciates how the younger always checks on him when he thinks he’s possibly having a hard time.
“I know you can, Lee Minho.” Seungmin smiles, teasingly. “Now, make one of those winter specials for me.”
“Ah, so bothersome.” Minho whines, but he is quick to grab a cup to start the drink the other asked for.
Seungmin laughs again. Of course, Minho needs to speak and act completely different, it’s his thing. Maybe, just maybe, Seungmin likes it. Maybe he finds it endearing, but he will never say it out loud.
Without saying anything else, Seungmin goes to sit comfortably beside the window. From that table, he is able to see the counter and Minho behind it. It’s not his first time there, he sat at the same table the first day of the vacation, when he went to see how Minho was doing under the excuse of wanting to see if the café was as good as the one he usually goes to.
Eventually, Seungmin attention is focused on his phone, scrolling through the photos he took during the week. He has a good camera at home, but it’s not that often that he uses it. He is used to the routine, when he can’t carry the camera around because of the classes, so, on vacation, he also forgets it.
That’s why he settles certain days to go out solely to photograph, even though his phone takes pretty good photos.
“That’s a good one.” a voice startles him, but he is quick to relax when Minho’s hand settles his drink on the table.
Seungmin doesn’t answer, feeling the presence of the older watching above his shoulder while he observes the picture on the phone.
Snow shining under the fading sun, the sky turning red far away and a little kitty watching through a near window. The details are much more, but that’s what the photo portrays. It really is a good one, really pretty.
“I like the little cat, it’s like he was laughing at the freak outside his window.” Minho teases, zooming on the photo to prove his point. Well, it’s true, the cat’s face does look like he finds something funny.
Seungmin tries to glare at him but, when he looks up, he finds Minho’s face a lot closer than what he was expecting, the older almost resting the chin against his shoulder. They breathe the same air for a second, just until Seungmin looks at his phone again in a poor attempt to cover his embarrassment.
“Well, I’m doing something good if the cat finds me funny.” Seungmin still has the courage to tease back, even knowing his ears are red.
He knows the message has been delivered as soon as Minho gasps. Seungmin has just compared Minho to that little cat in the photo, and that earns him a pinch in the ear.
“Auch!” Seungmin covers his ear while looking back at the older, this time moving a little to put more distance between them. He finds a huge smile on Minho’s face, not even a bit of regret in it.
“Enjoy your drink!” Minho says, saved from the younger’s deathly glare when a new customer walks in. Seungmin only groans, hearing Minho’s laugh while he walks away.
They both know Seungmin isn’t angry. In fact, he finds the bickering (or Minho) quite endearing. That’s the dynamic they have going on, being it something new for the younger, but he finds himself enjoying it. Minho enjoys it too, at least that’s what Seungmin thinks.
On another hand, it’s easy for everyone to tell that they are closer now, but not all is what it seems. Their relationship has shifted, no one can deny that, but they know better. You can’t change a relationship in one night, neither a person.
Minho is still Minho.
What is that supposed to mean? Well, they still fight, and Seungmin still has to apologize for things that are not his fault, but something did change. Minho apologizes too, not always being able to say the words out loud but always making sure that the younger understands the message. Seungmin doesn’t ask for more, that’s enough for now.
Yeah, that’s enough…
“Hey, dumbass! Your phone is ringing!” someone screams in the younger’s ear, that someone being -of course- Minho.
Seungmin jumps in his seat, startled. Minho runs away right after the younger is back on earth, avoiding any confrontation even though the phone is actually ringing, so Seungmin couldn’t have fought him. Seungmin sighs, looking at Minho’s back before answering the phone.
“Hello?” Seungmin asks.
His sister’s voice is heard after that, questioning where he is and why he is not home yet. The call ends as soon as he explains it, the promise to not arrive late floating in the air until Seungmin gets up from his seat and walks to the counter.
“Min.” Seungmin calls, being sure to get Minho’s attention with the nickname the elder hates. No, he doesn’t hate it, but Seungmin is only aware that it works when he tries to annoy Minho.
The older doesn’t turn around, occupied with some drinks, but he hums to let Seungmin know he’s listening. No need to turn around when he already knows who is calling for him, that mostly being because he has Seungmin’s voice memorized rather than because of the nickname.
“I’m going home.”
It’s just like Seungmin is plainly announcing his intentions while leaving the money for his drink on the counter because, after that, when Minho hums again, he just walks away. No need for proper goodbyes between them, neither getting angry at that because there are times when the words are too overwhelming, especially for Minho.
The door closes behind the younger, causing Minho’s eyes to stop looking at the well-known figure. The little smile on his face is impossible to hide while he picks the money because the younger makes the remaining hours of work easier even though he has already left.
Another day is left behind, and he can only think about how the next day is the last before he has his week of vacation. He’s free until the 29th, or the 28th if there’s too much work for the others to handle.
He had always worked during Christmas week but, this time, he managed to be quicker than the other workers, so he got to choose his vacations to be in Christmas week. He’s still surprised about that.
Maybe it was the world doing him a favor because, with the arrival of a new day, he soon realizes it was probably for the best. He feels the headache kicking in as soon as he opens his eyes, and, when he swallows, the realization that his throat is sore comes along. But that’s not the whole thing because, judging by his hot and sticky skin, he probably has a fever too.
The day starts bad, he feels like shit.
Minho closes his eyes again, but the sheets sticking to his sweaty skin makes him hate the thought of staying in bed more than the thought of getting up, that’s why he pulls the sheets aside. Getting up it’s not his best move because he feels his stomach churning as soon as he does it, which causes him to run to the bathroom.
The cold floor soon breaks through his pajama pants, meeting his burning skin in a poor attempt to cool him off. The dizziness causing his world to spin, and his eyes falling shut trying to avoid the sensation creeping up his throat.
It’s the way he can’t even think about getting up that makes him realize that the thought of going back to bed is horrible, almost as much as the thought of going out. Now his whole body is hurting, he can’t pinpoint where the pain comes from anymore.
Not only that, but it also suddenly breaks in the thought of going to work, and he can’t help it anymore, he throws up. Thinking of the food sends him over the edge, but that actually helps him to feel a little better, the dizziness slowly going away after that.
The passing minutes allow him to reorganize his thoughts because he gets up carefully, focused on finding a thermometer. It doesn’t take long to find that his burning skin isn’t just a feeling, the thermometer letting him know that he really needs some medicine if he’s planning to survive his day.
He curses under his breath, dragging himself into the kitchen. He has to work today, not because of the money but because he’s the only one who can do it, it’s his shift because no other worker is free at that hour, the only person that can join him is on vacation.
He sighs, swallowing the medicine with water before heading to the shower. The clothes resting near the shower are the warmest he owns; even double socks are added into the outfit. It’s not the most comfortable thing, but he really needs to keep the cold away.
It sucks because when he catches a cold it takes forever to get rid of it, that’s why he takes care of himself, but he couldn’t avoid feeling cold while working.
Minho doesn’t get sick easily but, when he does, it’s hard for him to do anything more than lay in bed. Even though it’s hard when he can’t fall asleep because sleep is what works better for him, but his body doesn’t always cooperate.
What should he do? Turning off the warm water and getting out of the shower already has him shivering, like trying to prove a point. It will really be a long and exhausting day.
That’s how the hours keep passing slowly, the boy just surviving here and there, incapable of staying still. Minho is restless, uncomfortable in bed and… just uncomfortable everywhere.
The time to go is almost welcomed with happiness.
Well, his time to be happy ending as soon as he steps outside of the house, the wind reminding him that he will have to bear the cold for a couple of hours. He shivers, the fever is not completely gone neither is his headache, but, at least, his throat feels better after some tea with honey, it won’t last long though.
Minho feels tired even before starting his shift but, as soon as he enters the café, it’s like his energy is drained all at once. He sighs, abandoning his warm jacket and greeting his co-workers, only one of them will stay for a couple of hours with him, the café it’s all his after that.
It’s not that bad at first, the presence of someone else helping to go through the hours more easily, but, if Minho has to be honest, there are not many people around, he can manage it alone pretty well.
Maybe that thought causes a reaction because the world proves him wrong, two hours remaining, and the café is overcrowded. Minho curses under his breath every time the door opens.
“Hello, welcome to our café.”
That sentence is repeated like a mantra. Minho is so tired of it, so fucking tired of the headache that doesn’t seem to go away even though he took painkillers an hour ago. There’s something more to add, he’s sure the fever has returned because his whole body hurts, and he feels like falling every time he moves too quickly.
There’s one point when he doesn’t think he will be able to finish his shift, a sick feeling in his throat when someone order’s a piece of chocolate cake, his stomach turning when he serves it, and he almost has to run away.
Somehow, he manages to get through another hour. Only one left.
Tell it fate or luck, but a lot of people leave the café in that last hour. Now there’s only a couple and a group of friends at their tables, the door still opens a lot but most of the customers are just for takeaway.
Minho is grateful for that. Sure, he still has to make the drinks and all that, but it’s easier if they don’t stay because he can start cleaning. Not only that, the less noise the better for his hurting head.
The door opens again, steps approaching the counter.
“Hello, welcome to our café.”
At this point, he’s not really aware of who is standing in front of him, he just greets and nods when the other’s order, so it’s not that surprising that he missed the way the customer, or should we say Seungmin, is looking at him.
“Good night to you too.” the younger answers sarcastically. “You look bad.”
“Oh, Seungmin. Hello.” Minho is almost whispering, not forcing his throat now that he knows it’s just Seungmin. “Do you want the same as always?”
It’s the usual question, he’s not even processing the conversation. It’s then when Seungmin actually looks concerned, catching a glimpse of Minho’s eyes, they are watery and out of focus.
“Min, are you okay?” the worry slips between his words, even the nickname feels soft this time.
“Yeah, just sick.” Minho tries to smile, which comes out as a frown.
“Sick?”
“I have a cold, the head is killing me, but I’m okay. I’m sure I look worse than what it is.” Minho assures, but he’s clearly lying, he feels as bad as it seems.
“Yeah, sure.” Seungmin replies, not believing a single word. “Let me…”
Seungmin doesn’t finish his sentence, but Minho can see the younger’s hand approaching him before it’s placed in his forehead. Seungmin almost yelps, taken by surprise when he feels how hot Minho’s skin actually is.
“My god, you are burning.” the younger says, now clearly worried.
Then, he tries to move his hand away. Keyword: tries. Minho holds it in place, closing his hand around the younger’s wrist in a quick movement to keep him from moving.
“Feels good.” Minho muttered, the hand in his forehead being cold because Seungmin was outside just a minute ago. It felt good against his burning skin.
“You should be in bed.”
Seungmin is gentle with his words, but Minho scoffs, still not quite used to someone worrying for him. Seungmin knows that, it’s not a coincidence that he usually hides his concern under jokes or dares, but no one can blame him for not being able to do it this time, Minho has a really bad fever.
“I would be if I didn’t have to work.” Minho says, not feeling good enough to come up with a more interesting reply.
“I know that, you dummy. I’m asking why are you working.” Seungmin manages to sound more lighthearted this time, shoving the worry deep in his heart with the knowledge that nothing good will come from showing it. “Normal people skip work when they are this sick.”
“I guess I’m not normal then. Congratulations, Kim Seungmin, you may have discovered an alien.” Minho actually jokes, finally letting go of Seungmin’s wrist with a teasing smirk.
It would be a lie if Seungmin says it didn’t relax him a little. Then, his hands are on the counter, his body leaning in so he can keep his voice low in order to not help in worsening Minho’s headache.
“Ha ha, so funny. Now make one of those winter specials, the one with honey.”
“Wow, I thought you would take it easy on a sick person, but I guess I was wrong. I will remember this.” Minho teases but, as always, he complies.
To be fair, Seungmin did ask for the most complicated drink, it’s some kind of tea with honey. Actually, it’s the best one for winter because it’s not a cold drink, so a lot of people have been asking for that for the past few days.
On another hand, Minho can’t actually blame the younger for making him work when he’s sick. He finds out why as soon as he sets the drink on the counter and looks up to meet a smiling Seungmin.
“It’s actually for you, enjoy it!”
And, just like that, Seungmin walks away, sitting on the usual table while leaving behind a shocked Minho. Not an understatement, Minho’s mouth is hanging open thanks to the younger’s words.
He probably should have known, it’s for everyone’s knowledge that honey is good when your throat hurts.
It’s just what it is, Seungmin taking care of him in subtle ways, so he can’t say no when the realization hits. Minho would say he finds it annoying, but not quite. He’s grateful, maybe even happy that someone takes the time to think about how to help him without interfering in his way of doing things.
Small little things, small gestures making Minho fall.
Fall into what? The sun that Seungmin is. At this point, Minho is just orbiting around the younger, not the other way around. It may not seem like it, being Seungmin the one who often follows Minho, but it’s the reality.
Finally, his shift ends. Sadly, not all is good about that, Minho can’t be happy about it when he still has to clean before leaving. He sighs, feeling the hot skin under his cold hands when he brushes the hair away from his face.
It has come to the point that his headache is just an annoying buzzing, no energy left to worry about that when he still has to keep himself going until he returns home. On another hand, his throat feels as well as it can be after a whole evening of speaking to customers, and that’s thanks to the drink Seungmin bought for him.
Apart from that, he has some good news. Seungmin is still there, helping to clean even though Minho has said not to multiple times.
At another time, Minho would have fought the younger but now, now he has no energy to do that. He is grateful to have another pair of hands helping because they can finish faster this way, and they do. Minho doesn’t know how much time passed, but he’s already engulfing himself with his jacket, ready to go home.
“Is it okay if I walk you home?” the sudden question makes Minho aware of the younger’s presence once again, turning around to find a slightly nervous Seungmin avoiding his gaze.
“Cute.” Minho mutters under his breath without thinking. “It’s okay, I guess.”
That’s apparently enough for Seungmin, who walks past Minho until he reaches the door, immediately holding it open for the older to go outside. It’s a nice gesture, but Minho shivers as soon as the winter’s hands reach into the warm space the café is.
At this point, is just his body response, he doesn’t even register it anymore, so he just walks outside, the moon quietly welcoming him into the open space.
Minho closes his eyes, almost grateful for the fresh essence of the winter after too much time being kept inside. He doesn’t like going outside that much but, when he’s sick… Oh, when he’s sick! Being sick makes him a ball of nerves even when he has no energy to move, he just hates staying still.
A sick Minho is a pain in the ass, literally.
“Here.” soft voice surrounds him when the younger appears in front of him, gentle hands following as they tuck a scarf around his neck, Seungmin’s scarf.
“It’s cold. I won’t watch over you if you get sick.”
Yes, Minho is also cranky when he’s sick but, despite his tone, he holds onto the brown scarf, feeling the soft fabric under his fingers. He probably sounds a little harsh, but he finds himself smiling when Seungmin turns and walks away, letting his words fall into nothing.
But, perhaps, the most endearing thing happens when Seungmin stops after a few steps and just waits there, not facing Minho nor moving, just waiting for something to happen.
Something as in Minho approaching him until they can walk beside each other, hands almost brushing into the comfortable silence set between them? Yes, that’s exactly it.
No one breaks the silence, they just put a foot in front of the other at a non-spoken pace. That’s all it takes for the world to know that the two boys may not have a conventional friendship but that they do look for the other.
It’s slow, Minho’s house is not that far, but they walk slowly, mostly because Minho doesn’t seem able to maintain a quick pace even if all he wants is to fall into his bed and sleep. But they finally arrive, and Seungmin watches as the older holds his keys, struggling to open the door in his hazy state.
“Seungmin.” Minho calls, and the younger needs nothing more to reach for the dangling keys in the other’s hand. He opens the door, watching as Minho enters and stumbles while almost kicking his shoes off.
Seungmin knows he can leave now, he knows he should leave because Minho has always been clear about the boundaries, and his house is definitely on the restricted area, in which Seungmin is not allowed yet.
Knowing that, he just stands there, in the door frame, doubting if he should say goodbye or just leave silently. Minho didn’t seem aware of his presence anymore, too busy taking off his jacket. So… should he just close the door and leave?
“You are letting the cold into my house. Come in or go, but shut the damn door.”
That again, the limbo. Seungmin is standing in a thin line despite Minho’s words because, should he take that as an invitation or not?
It’s always so hard with Minho.
Seungmin isn’t sure about what to do because something tells him that he is abusing Minho’s trust, that the older would have never offered that if he wasn’t in that sick state. But there’s also something telling him that this is an important choice, that leaving will be an answer to an unspoken question.
What to do?
The younger looks at Minho just in time to see the threat passing from his eyes to his mouth, a second away from being manifested in words. He must do something like right now, no more time for doubting.
Seungmin steps in, the door closing with a thud behind him.
For a moment, they are just staring at each other, Seungmin catching on Minho’s surprise until the last only hums before walking further into the house. What should he do now? Is following Minho an option?
“There’s tea if you want. I want some.” Minho’s voice comes to the rescue, asking the younger to make something in a weird way, his weird way.
That’s a game Seungmin knows, the familiarity of it finally making him move. He doesn’t know where Minho is, he has no idea where the kitchen is, but the house doesn’t seem that big, he can manage without the older guiding him.
Seungmin arrives at what seems the living room, hearing water falling as soon as he does. So is there where Minho is, showering. Well, Seungmin would have liked Minho telling him about it, but Minho is… special. He can almost hear the older nagging about him being in his own house and, therefore, with no need to explain himself. Seungmin smiles.
Careful steps keep wandering around, controlled eyes avoiding every single thing that can be behind Minho’s walls. Seungmin knows he is welcomed in the house, Minho would have said it if he wasn’t, but, still, he doesn’t want to push too much, so photos or decorations are only seen, not remembered.
The final question is: how the hell did Seungmin manage to not only find the kitchen but also find everything else to make the tea? We may never know, but the boy is already sitting in front with hot tea in his hands when Minho comes out of the shower.
It’s impossible to tell if the sight of Seungmin humming to some song surprises Minho because he just sits across the younger, catching his drink when the younger slides it over the table. Minho hums as a thank you, hair dripping onto the towel on his shoulders while he takes a sip.
“You should dry your hair properly; you are already sick.” Seungmin points out, speaking for the first time since he has entered the house.
Minho hums, again, but does nothing more than take another sip.
“Minho-“
“Do it for me.” the older cuts him off, apparently unbothered by what he’s asking as he takes another sip.
Well, Seungmin isn’t unbothered about it, he almost chokes on his own drink because he sure wasn’t expecting something like that, something that personal to leave Minho’s mouth.
Seungmin looks for any hints that the other boy is joking but, as he finds none, he finally shrugs, abandoning his seat to stand behind Minho, taking the towel from his shoulders to throw it atop of his head. He starts drying off Minho’s hair with slow movements, picking up the pace when the other doesn’t complain about it.
“You are a big baby.” Seungmin blurts out without thinking, pink tinting his cheeks when he realizes what was said.
“Sure.” Minho replies nonchalantly but, if Seungmin hadn’t been so busy taking care of his shame, he would have seen the tips of Minho’s ears also turning red.
The sound of the fabric is the only thing breaking the silence because, when Seungmin drops the towel into the table, the room succumbs into complete silence. The younger watches his work, nodding when he’s satisfied with it before approaching his hand to Minho’s forehead.
“You are still hot.” Seungmin states, putting his hand away as he walks to his seat again.
“I know I’m hot, but thanks for the compliment.” Minho winks, laughing as soon as Seungmin rolls his eyes. “I already took something for that.”
Minho isn’t dumb, he knows how to take care of himself, but Seungmin feels better knowing that the older is feeling well enough to joke with him. Sure, the shower helped, but Minho really needs to sleep if he wants to heal quickly.
“Okay, go to sleep then. I bet you don’t want to spend all of your vacations in bed.” Seungmin scolds playfully, getting up to put his glass into the sink.
No response from the older, so Seungmin looks at him, just in time to catch him slowly nodding. Maybe Seungmin was wrong, Minho is exhausted and not feeling as good as it seems if he complies that easily.
There’s nothing more he can do besides leaving the other to rest, so he starts walking to the door, picking his jacket and scarf on the way out. As always, there’s no need for a clear goodbye, so he doesn’t think too much when Minho doesn’t move from his seat.
Seungmin has his hand in the doorknob when he freezes.
“Seungmin, will you come tomorrow?”
That’s an unspoken question even if it has been said aloud. It has been said aloud but that’s not how it works, they both know that.
Another decision falls between Seungmin’s hands, who’s not sure how he has to answer to that. He can’t think too much about it, knowing that Minho has spoken from the kitchen so he will think Seungmin has already left if he doesn’t receive an answer.
Seungmin can’t answer, he doesn’t know how to do it neither his words seem ready to leave his mouth, so he does what he’s best at. Actions, he acts. The scarf abandons his neck again, hanging beside Minho’s jacket when the door closes behind him.
It takes a while for Minho to finish his tea, and it’s not until then that he drags his feet to the front door. There’s no explanation on why he does it, no promises or previous events to back his actions, but he does it.
“Silly.” Minho chuckles out, the soft fabric of the scarf running under his fingers until his hand falls to his side and he drags his feet again, this time into the bedroom and under the sheets.
The night welcomes him with wide arms, warmth slowly providing struggles to keep his eyes open. There’s one last thought before he falls asleep, one last mumbled thought before he drifts into dreamland.
“See you tomorrow, Kim Seungmin.”
Seungmin is there, handing him a cup of hot tea with extra honey because he has been continuously coughing for the last hour. It arrives just in time, Minho holding onto the cup with watery eyes after a sudden coughing fit shook his aching body.
“Thanks.” Minho says after taking a sip of the beverage, voice slightly hoarse.
After that, he catches a glimpse of Seungmin’s smile before taking another sip. Seungmin plops himself onto the couch again, shuffling until he finds comfort.
Yes, the younger is now sitting on the couch next to him, focused on the television without worrying about the couple of minutes he has missed from the movie because of making tea for Minho. It’s not like he has seen the movie before, just that he doesn’t mind missing it in favor to take care of a sick Minho.
“You can take it back if you want, it’s not like I paid much attention either.”
That’s Minho, who sets the drink on the floor before looking to the other, who is already looking at him. Seungmin is probably considering if he should really replay the last minutes of the movie or not, but he finally shrugs and does it, setting his attention on the television again after that.
It feels like a fever dream. The way Seungmin’s knee is an inch away from his, or the way the entirety of Seungmin is there, keeping him company when he sure has better things to do. Actually, it’s not that, it’s the way the younger is just casually sitting beside him in his house, which was banned territory just a day ago.
It’s crazy the way it feels so natural, so comfortable. It’s crazy because it’s not a dream, it’s reality.
Sometimes, it just takes one decision to change a life. Or two.
Minho feels a hand pressing against his forehead and he realizes he was about to fall asleep; he was in that semi-conscious state before the contact returned him to earth. He opens his eyes, slightly moving his head to see Seugnmin’s face.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought you were asleep.” the younger quickly apologizes, taking his hand back in a hurry while his ears start to heat up. He’s embarrassed as if he has been found doing something he shouldn’t, cute.
“Almost, but not quite.” Minho replies, amused by the way Seungmin is looking down to avoid eye contact.
“You don’t have a fever.” Seungmin feels the need to say, keeping his head low after checking if Minho is still looking at him, which he is.
“Are you sure about that? I don’t think you had enough time to check it.” the older teases, smirking when the red in the younger’s ears become clearer. But he’s not done, he changes his position to lean forward the other’s body, placing his head on Seungmin’s personal space. “You should check properly.”
Seungmin’s first reaction is to make himself smaller, tensing up at the proximity and fighting with the urge to push the older away. But his second reaction is to look up, straight into Minho’s eyes as he tries to fight the red tinting his cheeks.
“Okay.” Seungmin mutters out, instantly placing his hand on Minho’s forehead without moving his body away.
Well, Minho was not expecting that. To be honest, Seungmin wasn’t either.
“See? I told you, you don’t have a fever.” Seungmin says, more confident now that he can’t be questioned anymore. He takes his hand away one more time.
Minho just hums, eyes still locked with Seungmin’s.
It’s finished, no more excuse to invade Seungmin’s personal space, but Minho seems to consider that returning to his spot will be weirder than just sitting there, so they end up with their shoulder’s touching and Minho’s right leg brushing against Seungmin’s crossed ones.
If that affects them, they keep it inside, both landing their attention on the movie even though it’s hard to know what’s happening when neither of them has been paying attention to it. It’s not something they can say, so they just keep watching in silence.
It’s awkward at first, the proximity is. Besides Minho being the one to sit glued to the younger he was the one trying to be more still, trying to keep their bodies away from touching. Minho is usually the one who rejects skinship, so Seungmin is also trying to not move much.
After all, it’s the discomfort that makes them relax. Minho is the one who gives up first, being tense not helping to deal with his aching body, but Seungmin also follows when Minho seems to be fine with it. It’s not much contact, but it’s ten times more comfortable when they don’t have to control their little movements in order to not make the other uncomfortable.
The movie keeps going while they forget about what personal space is.
It’s an interesting movie, it really is, but Minho can only pay attention for a while before starting to fight against the drowsiness. He’s tired, not because he hasn’t slept enough but because he is not feeling well, his body hurts after a night of waking up because of the coughing. Maybe he is tired because he didn’t really rest during the night.
He seems to be winning the fight for a while but, eventually, his eyes can’t stay open anymore. He doesn’t want to fall asleep, not when Seungmin is there with him, but he can’t really decide on that. The sudden movement of his head falling is what keeps him conscious.
“You should sleep if you are tired.”
Seungmin noticed, of course he did. Minho rubs his eyes almost violently, trying to seem fine when he stares at the other. He fails, and it shows at the way Seungmin is trying not to smile so, instead of going with: I’m fine, he says something else.
“You are here, I shouldn’t sleep.” that probably sounds accusatory but, when Seungmin tries to say something, he cuts him off before he can even start. “And I don’t want you to leave yet.”
Oh well, that’s embarrassing. Minho is too sleepy to notice it, but Seungmin looks at him with wide eyes and blushing cheeks. Maybe Seungmin should start counting how many times can his face get red in the span of an hour.
“Okay, but feel free to kick me out if you want to sleep.”
Minho hums, both returning the attention to the movie. Not really both, Minho only tries to do it until his eyes start closing again. The routine of waking up when his head falls forward starting again.
Seungmin notices, but he doesn’t say anything as he knows the older will get angry if he keeps pointing it out. He may not be able to convince him verbally, but he has other ways. The plan starts when he can’t take the sight of a struggling Minho anymore.
The younger waits until Minho’s eyes are closed again, the seconds slowly falling into the room when Seungmin approaches his hand to the other’s head. A gentle touch guided it to his shoulder before leaving.
Minho moves and Seungmin holds his breath, only to let out a sigh of relief after Minho finds a comfortable position. Finally, he feels Minho’s body leaning completely against his own, cheek pressed against his shoulder, and steady breath.
Minho is asleep.
After that, Seungmin doesn’t dare to move, even when the credits leave the television screen in the black, thing that he only notices a few minutes after it happens. No, he has not been paying attention to the film after Minho fell asleep, he tried but failed.
What was the reason? The same that doesn’t give a truce to his burning ears, the same that keeps his thoughts all scrambled. Minho, just him.
Seungmin can’t pinpoint what is the cause of his heart beating so fast, if Minho’s breath fanning his neck every now and then or the way he can feel the warmth of Minho’s body against his.
He only knows that is driving him crazy.
Luckily, his phone buzzes with an incoming call. Maybe not so lucky because Minho moves against him, the threat of him waking up more present with every second passing. Maybe he is indeed lucky, if Minho wakes up his thoughts can stop spiraling.
No, he decides against it. Seungmin doesn’t want the older to wake up, not when his sleep seems so peaceful, not when he needs to rest, so he picks up the call.
“Hello, I will call you back in a second.” the younger whispers into the phone, ending the call right after without letting his sister respond.
The promise to call back makes him sigh, knowing that his sister will call again if he doesn’t do it in the next five minutes. Well, five minutes should be enough. They aren’t, not when Minho holds his arm at his first move and doesn’t want to let go even when Seungmin manages to get up after laying Minho against the couch completely.
After a few more struggles, he’s free. Seungmin needs to call right now, but he still finds time to grab a blanket to cover Minho with.
“Hel-“
“Why did you hang up on me?” his sister is kind of angry, but Seungmin can sense the curiosity in her voice. He knows an explanation will be enough to calm her down.
“Minho is sleeping, I didn’t want to wake him up.” Seungmin explains, a small smile forming the words.
“Oh. Did you invite him already?” his sister asks, not a trace of anger left in her voice. She seems to sense something through the phone because she is speaking again before the younger can answer. “You didn’t. What are you waiting for?”
“I… Leave me alone.” Seungmin sighs, trying to calm his heartbeat once more.
“Okay, okay. Buy something to eat when you come back home, I don’t think I will be able to cook before leaving.” she says, and Seungmin can hear the laugh in her voice.
The call ends after he promises to do just that.
Seungmin checks the hour, he should leave if he wants to buy something for dinner. He doesn’t really want to leave just like that, not when Minho is sleeping, but he needs to. If he sees the good thing about this whole situation…
…he can invite Minho with a note with the excuse that he couldn’t do it personally because he was sleeping. Yes, that will work.
After what seems like an hour, he’s leaving Minho’s place with quiet steps. The promised note was placed on top of his scarf, both things resting on the ground in front of the couch.
The note reads the following:
It’s another unspoken question but, this time, Seungmin is the one formulating it and not the one answering it.
Minho will have to answer, to act.
∞
“What do you mean by: I don’t know when he’s coming? Didn’t you talk about that when you invited him?” it’s Seungmin’s sister, who seems to be stressed out by the younger vague answers. “It’s you who needs to tell him, if you don’t didn’t do it in person you needed to message him. Kim Seungmin! Are you listening to me?”
Oh yeah, his sister is angry. She only uses his full name when she’s tired of dealing with him but, this time, she has a good reason, Seungmin is avoiding her eyes, fidgeting with his shirt while the guilt makes him feel small. He can’t talk, the answer to those questions is so fucking embarrassing.
“I… I didn’t actually invite him. Well, I left him a note asking him to come… I did invite him, but I don’t even know if he’s coming.” Seungmin rambles in half whispers, but he can tell his sister has heard him when a loud gasp takes over the silence.
“Oh my god, you are unbelievable! Go text him right now.” it’s an order, he can tell it even without seeing his sister’s face.
Seungmin almost runs to his room, jumping on his bed with the phone between his hands. How should he explain that he hasn’t texted Minho since that day? How should he feel about the fact that Minho hasn’t texted either, not an answer to his question no nothing.
He can’t expect his sister to understand when he doesn’t either. Actually, he does, but it’s not something he can put to words, he just… he doesn’t find it that weird. No, that’s not it.
Anyway, it makes less sense every time he thinks about it.
There’s no way he can text Minho right now, not when it means asking if he will come. He can’t do that, but he can’t disobey his sister either. She will be angry if he doesn’t follow her instructions, and he won’t be able to calm her down if he can’t explain why it’s important not to contact Minho right now.
Seungmin groans defeated, opening opens his chat with Minho. He’s ready to ask, to fuck everything up, but…
Surprise!
He sees something that almost makes him drop his phone.
It’s Minho’s profile photo. It changed, and he knows it happened very recently because he checked his messages this morning.
Seungmin’s hands are shaking when he clicks on it. As immediate as the photo is displayed on the whole screen, Seungmin chokes on thin air. It takes him a moment to process what he’s seeing but, when he finally does, he runs downstairs.
The phone is left behind, still showing Minho’s photo on the screen.
What did Seungmin see? Nothing more than Minho’s shy smile showing up thanks to his hand holding down the brown scarf around his neck, SEUNGMIN’S brown scarf.
“He’s coming!” Seungmin excitedly yells as soon as he enters the kitchen, where his sister is already cooking dinner.
“Good to know, when?” his sister is trying to hold a grudge for earlier, but she can’t help to smile when she meets her brother’s sparkling eyes.
“I don’t know, he has to sort out a few things before coming. I think he will be just in time for dinner.” Seungmin replies, shrugging.
Maybe that’s not a good reply, but he can’t do any better without actually lying to his sister. The older girl is about to fight him, but something changes her mind before doing it, so she just nods and goes back to his cocking.
What she thinks about the whole thing is a mystery, but she sure finds diversion in the way Seungmin almost leaves the kitchen with happy little jumps. It’s funny to see this side of him, especially when she can really tell that his mood is completely changed with the only thought of Minho coming for dinner.
It’s Christmas, a day to spend with family. Hmmm, not really.
It’s Christmas, a day to spend with your loved ones. Yeah, better.
It’s Christmas and, as always, Seungmin will spend it with his loved ones. His sister was usually the only one, but Minho is now included in that group, so he’s really happy that the older accepted to come.
Seungmin is still wearing his wide smile when he comes back to his room, taking some clothes before heading to the shower. He needs to be quick before his sister starts stressing about everything as she always does when they invite someone over.
I mean, it’s not like they have invited a lot of people for the last few years, just some of his sister’s friends, and never on important days.
Seungmin has been busy for the past hour, commanded by a sister who wanted all to be perfect. Finally, she approves everything and settles down the last thing on the table, a bottle of wine. Seungmin wrinkles his nose, he doesn’t like wine.
“You don’t even like that.” he points out with disgust, he doesn’t even like the smell of wine.
“I like wine, but I only drink it on special occasions.” his sister answers, smiling before disappearing from the room, probably to change her clothes.
Seungmin looks at the bottle a little more, finally shoving his disgusted face away to go sit on the couch. It’s not like he doesn’t like alcohol, just that he can’t suffer the strong smell of it, so he is only fine with light alcoholic drinks. To be honest, he almost never drinks alcohol.
As his sister has said, she only drinks on special occasions. The younger remembers just vaguely the last time she drank in front of him, and that’s why it feels strange to have alcohol in the house.
Maybe that’s not the full reason, but he doesn’t want to dig further because he will burn himself. It’s better this way.
Seungmin gets up to drink some water, and he has only the time to put the glass down on the table when someone rings the doorbell. He almost jumps in his place, the nervousness running through his body as he knows that it can only be Minho.
He’s not ready.
“Minnie, the door!” his sister shouts from upstairs.
That confirms one thing, he is the one who has to open the door. His body moves without his brain, knowing too well that he can’t keep Minho waiting if he doesn’t want him to leave before even entering the house.
That can’t happen. He takes one deep breath to calm his shaking hand before it meets the doorknob, another second to calm himself and he opens the door.
“Hello.” Seungmin greets.
He greets because is the only thing he can do before his brain shuts down, the little smile on his face as frozen as his whole body, only his eyes managing to express shock. Because, under the knowledge that Minho was sick a few days ago, how the hell can he look this good?
It’s not even for something he wears, it’s just him. Minho is only wearing a white fluffy sweater with maroon pants, dark boots, and his usual earrings. In fact, the only change is the slight tone of makeup he’s wearing, that and his hair, ash brown perfectly matching him.
That’s it, no real explanation for Seungmin to be enraptured beyond Minho’s usual charms. Fuck, he’s so pretty. That’s the reason for the alarm now going crazy inside of Seungmin’s head.
“Hi. I’m feeling better, so I thought I should bless you with my presence. I’m sure you were bored before I arrived.” the older says, a teasing wink and a bright smile softening his features.
Fuck, he’s so pretty. Yes, Seungmin’s brain, you already thought that.
Still in awe, Seungmin gestures the older to come it, trying to gather his thought quickly in order to start small talk with him until his sister is ready. Minho seems to disagree with that because, as he passes by him…
“You look cute in purple.” a whisper and a chuckle when Seungmin gasps, followed by Minho’s presence going further into the house.
Minho is messing with his mind. That realization comes at the perfect time, making the younger shake his head with a fond smile, the older is just playing with him. There’s no need to be nervous, he understands Minho the best when he’s being his annoying self.
On another hand, Seungmin does look cute in purple. He’s wearing a large purple sweater with pattern and black trousers, but the sweater paws sure make him look cute.
“Minho’s here!” Seungmin yells from under the stairs, then walks into the living room to find the older. “Stop looking at the pictures.”
“Why? You were an adorable baby; I wonder what happened.” Minho replies, and Seungmin can really tell that he has been joking since he opened the door.
“I bet you were the same as now, an annoying and ugly baby.” Seungmin shots back, playfully sticking his tongue out.
“Come here!” Minho jumped at him, that starting a chase between the boys.
Unfortunately, it’s not long after that Seungmin’s sister walks into the room. She’s wearing a bluish dress, makeup and braided hair. She looks amazing, she should be able to tell from the way both boys look at her with wide eyes. Yep, she can, a chuckle leaves his lips before she can control it.
“Glad to see you, Minho.” she says, and the boy returns the words.
That happens but Seungmin can only feel relieved because his sister seems to not be interested in teasing him tonight, he was already expecting her to bring back the subject from earlier. It wouldn’t be good for him or Minho.
“I’m hungry so, go seat at the table.” the girl says, already walking to the kitchen. “Do what I say, kids.”
Somehow, she catches their intentions before they can even say anything, so they look at each other, giggling a little while they follow the instructions. They sit at the table and, when Seungmin’s sister arrives with the food, they start eating, not without thanking her.
It’s a peaceful dinner filled with smiles and laughs, same with light conversation jumping from one topic to another. Firstly, Seungmin’s sister gets a chance to know more about Minho. Secondly, the boys keep laughing at the silliest things. Thirdly, Seungmin’s sister is just there, trying to comprehend the bond between the youngers. Finally, she gives up, just smiling fondly at the sight.
That’s how dinner ends, the siblings suddenly locking eyes when everyone has finished eating. Minho can’t even notice it before the two get up, leaving the table and the living room in a hurry, both trying to win a race to… wherever they are heading.
Minho can hear their laughs. He wonders what the hell just happened, but he just shrugs and waits for them to come back, he’s not that surprised about that behavior after hanging up with Seungmin, so he’s neither surprised that the girl can act the same as her brother.
To be honest, the siblings seem really different on the surface, but they are more similar than it seems. Both deeply love each other; they are a united family. Minho can even sense that the strong bond was created after some event, same with him and Seungmin, but he won’t ask that.
After a few moments of waiting, he figures out that he may head to the kitchen to find more water, as he has to take his meds. He sure is feeling better, as he has told Seungmin, but he needs something to ease the pain in his throat after talking for so long.
Minho does just that, and he’s back at the table way before the siblings can return. He still has to wait for another couple of minutes before he can hear the footsteps approaching, the figures appearing right after. Both of them are holding a bag.
“Do you mind explaining?” Minho questions, raising a brow at Seungmin.
The younger just smiles at him, ignoring his question while he gestures him to come near the couch, where he and his sister settle the bags. It’s making Minho anxious and nervous, the expectation making him move.
“I think the guest should go first, right?” the girl asks, maliciously smirking while looking at Seungmin, who nods with the same grin before turning to Minho.
Should Minho be scared? He trusts the siblings in front of them, but he doesn’t like the silent words that they share. It’s not that he doesn’t like it, it’s just that he wants to know too.
“Well… this is for you.” the girl speaks again, shoving his hand into the bag before pulling it out with a small package on it. She extends his hand to Minho, waiting for him to take the package. “Come on, open it.”
Minho looks up and down, to her face and her hand, eventually looking at Seungmin too, wondering if he should really do what he’s asked. The look on the younger’s face reassures him, so he slowly takes the package.
He just stares at it for a while, holding onto the thin line before someone can urge him to open it. He finally does, slowly but surely.
It’s a present, and maybe he should have expected that after being it handed to him, but he has never received that many gifts, surely not in the past years, so it takes him by surprise when he finds a little box with a pair of earrings and a cat-shaped pin.
“Seungmin told me that you love cats, animals in general, so I thought you would like to wear something that can help them.” Seungmin’s sister steps in, saving him from the shock with his soft voice.
Still, Minho can only nod, quietly examining the earrings and the pin.
“Thank you.” Minho finally finds his voice, a shy smile holding up his reddened cheeks. “Really, thank you so much.”
As he says that, he puts the pin on his sweater. It looks good, but he doesn’t stop to see it when he raises his hands to his ears, taking off his earrings before trying to put in the new ones.
“Let me help you.” the girl stops him, picking the earrings from Minho’s hands before reaching his ear. “There you go. Go look yourself in the mirror.”
Minho does what he’s told, still dumbfounded because of the surprise. It’s hard to know what to feel, but he’s feeling something, he’s sure about that. Maybe he should ask for Seungmin’s help, try to find out what is he suddenly feeling warm while looking at the mirror.
Speaking of Seungmin, the boy has been silent the whole interaction. He didn’t exactly know what was that his sister bought for Minho, but he’s now eternally grateful for the gift to cause sparkles in Minho’s eyes. It’s a look he has never seen before on the older, a look he’s already loving.
A look he wants to see more, a look he hopes to see again as he’s waiting to gift something to him too.
“I love them.”
Minho’s voice brings him back to the present, where Minho is smiling at his sister while thanking her again and again. There’s one point where she shushes the boy, giving Seungmin the opportunity to give him his gift.
“Minho. I hope you like it.” Seungmin catches Minho’s attention with those words, in time for the latter to receive the package that was almost thrown at him.
The older stares at it for a while, but not as much as before. Seungmin just stares, not bothering to hide the nervousness when Minho stops for a moment before setting aside the last part of the envelope.
Whatever emotion is set on Minho’s face, Seungmin can’t read it, he can only watch as the older holds the book between his hands, reading the little abstract on the back cover of it. Finally, Minho looks up, smiling.
“Thank you, Seungmin.”
That’s what Minho says but, somehow, it feels like he’s saying much more. His eyes are trying to tell everything that he can’t put into words, and Seungmin feels overwhelmed by it, his ears heating up and urging him to escape Minho’s gaze. Well, he does, but not in an expected way.
Seungmin hands Minho another present, breathing again as the latter stops their connection to look at it.
It doesn’t have an envelope, so Minho’s eyes directly meet with the simple black covers of a little notebook while his hands feel the roughness of it. There’s nothing more to see, as he’s met with a plain back cover when he turns it around.
Well, that’s a gift he doesn’t understand, but he’s about to say thank you when an invisible string seems to guide his hand, making him open the notebook.
Yeah, there it is.
There’s something written on the first page, neat but cute handwriting making sure that he knows is Seungmin the one who wrote it. But, who else could be? It’s a gift from the younger, of course it’s his handwriting.
Minho is about to fight himself.
Fortunately, he remembers that Seungmin and his sister are there, probably waiting for him to say something before continuing with the gifts, as they probably have one for the other. At least that’s what Minho thinks.
Well, he’s about to speak but, once again, it doesn’t happen as his mind focuses on the notebook and starts reading the words without asking him if that’s what he wants.
The note says:
Oh.
Just that. Yep, just oh.
Bullshit, Minho is nowhere near to a plainly: oh. His mind is racing almost as fast as his heart, which is a lot because the last is also beating harder than ever. A feeling that inflicts a deep pain, like a needle digging into his heart.
But it’s not actually painful, at least not in a bad way.
For Minho is hard to tell, he feels like someone is crushing his heart with the way his chest hurts, he feels the air is gone when he tries to breathe and the tears are between a thin wall that it’s starting to crack.
He can’t take it; he can’t deal with the kindness and the reassurance that those words exude. Minho can’t keep up with his emotions unfolding in front of his eyes, so he tries to shut them down, he silently begs them to return to their cage. It doesn’t work.
He wants to scream.
He’s doing it, maybe his lips are sealed but his heart is trying to be heard. When the words finally reach his mind, the undecipherable scream transforms into words: Seungmin, what have you done to me?
“Thanks.” Minho chokes out before the words in his mind have the chance to be heard. It’s almost a whisper, but his message sure arrives Seungmin when he presses the notebook against his chest.
That’s an answer, a promise. Seungmin knows as well as Minho.
What happens after that? Minho can’t tell. The boy is only able to regain his composure when the remaining gifts are already exchanged, leaving Seungmin with a new scarf and Seungmin’s sister with some jewelry.
She seems to sense Minho’s gaze because she diverts her attention to him, oblivious about the fight that the boy fought on his own while she was exchanging gifts with his brother. Well, maybe she isn’t that oblivious, but she makes sure to not show what she knows.
“In case you are wondering, I know it’s strange to give presents on Christmas, but Seungmin and I grew up with that tradition. But don’t worry, you don’t need to gift us anything, it’s only our tradition.” the girl offers an explanation for the forgotten questions. “You are welcome to join the tradition for the next year.”
She’s playing, Minho can tell that, but he still feels something crashing his heart again, and he can only stare at her. Luckily, she laughs and walks away, starting to clean the table.
Oh no, Minho is left alone with Seungmin. How is he supposed to look at the younger after he had a whole breakdown because of him, it’s not like it’s exactly Seungmin fault but, in a way, it is.
Maybe it’s an extremely lucky day for Minho because the younger just moves over to help his sister without saying anything to him and, eventually, when Minho joins them both, he doesn’t say anything either.
They clean up pretty fast, the silent agreement on not doing the dishes until the other day falling between Seungmin and his sister while Minho is still lost in his thoughts. They maybe finish fast, but it’s already pretty late, so it’s no surprise when Seungmin’s sister expresses just that.
“It’s late, you can stay if you want.” she invites Minho even though something is telling her that the boy will say no, it didn’t go unnoticed the way he and his brother were acting.
She maybe knows nothing, but she can tell that the notebook is something deep, something that she doesn’t need to know if the boys don’t want to tell her, so she is just giving a way out for Minho. She feels that the boy needs to go home and sort out his thoughts.
“I have something to do at home but thank you.” Minho smiles, and she can’t really tell if he caught her intentions or is just being himself.
“Okay, it was fun having you around. You can come any time you want, you will always be welcomed.” the girl says, softly smiling when Minho nods before heading to the door. “Won’t you say goodbye?”
She asks when Seungmin is still there, just watching as Minho walks away.
“Yeah… Yeah.” Seungmin nods, following the way to the door in time to catch Minho already opening it.
The older didn’t hear him, judging by the way he’s standing there staring at the scarf hanging with the jackets. Minho is already wearing his jacket, and the scarf is Seungmin’s, but the younger wishes for him to take it.
That’s why he stops in the middle of the corridor, not daring to move nor to breathe until Minho picks the scarf and leaves the house.
Fucking hell, Seungmin turns completely red.
∞
It’s another long day of work for Minho.
Correction: it has already been a long day of work. The café is already closed, Minho is just there because it’s 11:30 on New Year’s Eve, so he can’t return home if he doesn’t want to miss the start of the incoming year.
He doesn’t want to miss it.
Actually, it’s not that important, he has never considered it important even if he has followed the tradition every year, but he has started to understand the traditions after being with the Kim family during Christmas.
Maybe he is even a little bit excited.
The minutes are passing quite fast for him because he is cleaning everything up, so it’s already 11:50 when he checks the time again. He will watch the whole thing on his phone, so he sits on a table without realizing he has unconsciously chosen the one Seungmin always sits on.
A cup of coffee in front of him, the phone resting against it while Minho looks through the window. Little snowflakes slowly falling to the ground, it’s a pretty sight, and he feels the need to take a picture.
He picks his phone up, but the window shows in every photo he takes so he’s forced to go out for a moment to take the picture.
He does it and, without thinking, sends it to Seungmin.
Seungmin
[ photo ]
Me
[ photo ]
Oh, both had the same idea.
They actually send the photo at the same time. Minho presses on the photo, the same snowflakes he sees captured on it, Seungmin is also outside, he can tell because there’s no glass reflecting on the photo.
Neither of them answers the other, Minho just walks inside again. Probably Seungmin does too, since the year is two minutes away from ending.
It happens, the clock strikes 12 o’clock.
Seungmin
[ photo ]
The message pops up a minute into the new year.
Minho is quick to open the photo, which shows Seungmin and his sister on it, smiles, and the girl kissing the younger’s cheek. It’s a lovely sight. The way Seungmin’s eyes are full of happiness is a lovely sight.
He doesn’t know why he feels the need to answer, but he does.
Me
[ photo ]
The photo only shows his coffee, but it’s already an advance. Minho puts his phone down after that, pulling out a notebook instead. The notebook Seungmin gifted to him on Christmas, the notebook he yet has to use.
Every time his eyes land on it… His heart beats loudly.
It also does this time, but he forces himself to open it, quickly skipping the first page. He can’t look to Seungmin’s note if he wants to actually write something, and he does.
He does, and it’s the first time he writes. As soon as the pen finds the white surface…
Minho has answered an unspoken question.